


Once Again for the First Time

by MishaBerry



Category: Fantastic Four (Comicverse), Marvel 616, Spider-Man (Comicverse)
Genre: Bisexual Male Character, Break Up, Casual Sex, Coming Out, Especially Peter, Everyone is an idiot, Fluff and Angst, Gay Male Character, Gay Panic, Gay Sex, Getting Together, Homophobia, Jealousy, M/M, Rimming, Sex Toys, Timeline What Timeline, realizing you're Gay™ for your best friend
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-10
Updated: 2020-11-26
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:46:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 88,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22194268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MishaBerry/pseuds/MishaBerry
Summary: Johnny Storm has been hiding something all his life, keeping it a secret from everyone, even his family. When he finally reveals it to the world, Peter starts to question things he always thought to be true about him.Or; Johnny comes out of the closet, Peter has a crisis, fun times all around.
Relationships: Ben Grimm/Alicia Masters, Bobby Drake/Johnny Storm, Peter Parker/Johnny Storm, Reed Richards/Susan Storm (Fantastic Four)
Comments: 209
Kudos: 350





	1. Part I.i: Universal

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so stoked to finally be writing this, it's been in the think tank _forever_. I know I _technically_ haven't finished Nowhere but Forward, but it's so close to being done and I can't write the sexy parts at work lol.
> 
> Anyway, I hope everyone enjoys!
> 
> Trigger warning: f-slur

Johnny was restless. There was a constant buzz of energy under his skin, insistent but mercurial, like a mosquito you could hear but not see, and just as annoying. Nothing Johnny did seemed to be able to alleviate it, no matter what he did. The world around him seemed to conspire to frustrate him further, offering no outlets for relief. Tinkering in the guts of his cars, video games, working out in the gym, none of it was helping. Even flying, rocketing across the sky like a shooting star, with no clear goal or destination in mind didn't do much to scratch the itch under Johnny's skin.

It was too quiet, Johnny decided. The last couple of days had been relatively calm, and it was starting to grate on his nerves. The others seemed to be enjoying the break from the usual chaos, getting some much needed rest and spending quality time with one another. Johnny had tried to hang out with them, but Ben was off with Alicia and Reed and Sue were spending time together, the kids away at the babysitters, and Johnny wasn't in the mood to be a third wheel. The whole world seemed like it wanted a quiet night in.

Johnny didn't want quiet. Life was better with noise and colour and light. All the better to distract himself with.

Reaching for his phone, Johnny considered his options as he scrolled through his contacts. He didn't think he wanted to go too crazy, just enough to take the edge off. He probably could have gone out on his own, but he figured he could kill two birds with one stone this way.

Finally settling on a name, Johnny dialed and waited patiently for her to pick up. She was usually available, but if she wasn't there were a dozen others.

The line picked up. "Julia!" Johnny called before she could say anything. "Guess who?"

"I have call ID, I know who it is," Julia said, probably rolling her eyes. "What's up, hot stuff?"

"I need a party," Johnny said. "Something with a lot of noise and all the right people."

Julia hummed. "I think I know a couple places. Anything you want to do in particular? Any sort of vibe?"

"I need to be _seen_ ," Johnny said. "I need to see the right people and they need to see me, so nothing too crazy. Lot's of noise, but nothing with too much attention, I don't want to be dodging paps all night. Maybe for like an hour or so, but not all night."

"I think I've got a place," Julia said. "Might be hard to get in, so I'll have to make some calls."

Johnny scoffed dramatically. "I'm the Human Torch, I can get into anywhere."

"Keep telling yourself that," Julia laughed. "Okay, get all prettied up and I'll text you the address."

"I'm always pretty," Johnny said, then hung up. Venue secured, Johnny went to get changed.

Fifteen minutes later, Johnny landed on the sidewalk, flaming off as he hit the ground, reveling in the shouts of delight as people recognized him. A small figure came right up to him and took his arm.

Julia de Rosa was a short, plump woman with the thickest black hair Johnny had ever seen. By day she ran a popular Youtube beauty channel, but by night she was a model and Burlesque dancer. Johnny liked her, she was friendly and funny, with a sharp, analytical mind. More importantly, she knew how the game was played, and she knew the right people to play with.

"It a new-ish place," Julia explained. "Still building a clientele, and people are still testing it out. There's a few paps sniffing around, but they're mostly stalking certain people. They'll get a few snaps of us, but their attention is elsewhere for the most part."

"What's the place?" Johnny asked, following along where Julia led.

" _Mastuers_ ," Julia said.

"Ugh." Johnny wrinkled his nose.

"I know, but I promise, it's perfect," Julia said, tossing a lock of black hair over her shoulder. "New enough to be a hot ticket, old enough that people know about it, expensive enough to attract the right crowd, but cheap enough not to be exclusive. The perfect blend for anyone wanting to be seen but not pestered."

Johnny grinned. "In that case, lead the way," he said.

Julia laughed and pulled him along towards the club. Johnny could hear the thumping music from the other side of the street, and the line outside the door stretched down the block. Julia tugged him by the arm right up to the bouncer, who glanced at Johnny once before motioning them both inside.

"Told you, I can get into anywhere," Johnny said. Julia rolled her eyes at him.

The exterior of the club had been a concrete block of a building tricked out will all kinds of neon and laser lights, and the inside wasn't much different, though it had the added comfort of a bar area, tables, a second floor VIP section, and a dance floor. The music was loud and obnoxious, some kind of EDM club remix that could play on loop for an hour and no one would notice. Johnny pulled them towards the bar area.

"First one's on me," Johnny said, offering up a winning smile.

"This whole _night_ is on you," Julia huffed. "Mr. My-Sister-Married-Rich."

"Most of it goes into R&D and non-profit work," Johnny explained. He flagged down a bartender and ordered them both their usual drinks. He handed Julia's pink, umbrella-ladened monstrosity to her and they surveyed the crowd.

"So what first hot stuff?" Julia asked. "Dance for a bit, then make the rounds?"

"Rounds first," Johnny said, sipping his drink. "Then we dance, then rounds again."

"Sound like a plan," Julia said.

The two of them weaved through the throng of gyrating bodies, careful not to spill their drinks on anyone, and made their way to the VIP section. Johnny appreciated Julia's shrewdness when it came to this sort of thing. She knew how the game was played, how to be seen by the right people and keep herself at just the right distance so that everyone worth knowing knew her just well enough to like her, but she didn't get pulled too deep into the drama. She'd been a child star on a couple of obscure 90's TV shows and one famous one, so she'd been doing this just as long as Johnny had. There was a kind of kinship between them for that reason. Johnny figured that was the reason he'd never tried to make a move on her.

 _You_ know _the reason you haven't made a move_ , a tiny voice inside Johnny's head teased, louder than usual. Johnny shook it off and ignored the restless energy that crawled under his skin.

Security at the VIP section let them right through, and they climbed up the stairs to the 2nd level where they could look down at the dance floor and the throngs of people. A group of people looked up to see them and immediately waved them over, all smiles and cheer. Johnny plastered on his own smile to match and went up to the table.

"Erika, Bryttni, how are you guys?" Johnny asked, bending down for obligatory hugs and air kisses. The two girls were cousins, both insanely good looking and with modeling careers that Erika's father had bought them. They spent most of their time partying and begging for more money so they could keep partying.

"We're good," Bryttni giggled. "I've got another new modeling contract."

"That's amazing! I'm so happy for you," Johnny said, knowing that she'd lost her previous contract for showing up to the shoot too drunk to stand up.

"My agent and I have been talking about getting me a TV deal," Erika butted in, always eager to upstage her cousin. "Very hush-hush though, so don't spread it around," she said in a tone that suggested they tell as many people as possible.

"What about you, Julia?" Bryttni giggled. She was always putting a giggle in her voice, Johnny guessed to make herself sound cuter, but it mostly came off as annoying. "How's the stripping?"

"Burlesque," Julia corrected. "It's great actually. I just paid off my parent's house."

"Oh wow, I didn't know your parents were still in the country," Erika said, wide-eyed with surprise. "I thought they got deported."

Johnny bit his lip, knowing Julia preferred to fight her own battles. "Oh no, they're still very much in the country. They did just go on vacation though, saw a bunch of family."

"In Mexico?" Erika asked with a smile that was all teeth.

"Guatemala," Julia said, casually taking a sip of her drink.

"Oh right," Erika said. "I always forget. Silly me."

Johnny and Julie chatted for another moment before moving on to the next people who flagged them down, a trio of up and coming rappers, one of whom flirted relentlessly with Julia in Spanish. Johnny greeted and charmed and chatted, regaling anyone who asked with highlights of his adventures with the Fantastic Four. More than once they were invited to join other groups, but Johnny declined, preferring instead to keep to Julia for tonight.

Eventually they'd talked to everyone they'd meant to talk to and made their way back down to the dance floor, leaving their empty drinks on Erika and Bryttni's table as they walked by. They got out onto the dance floor and let the beat take over, and Johnny finally managed to relax. He loved to move, loved the feeling of the music blasting through his chest. Sue kept warning him about hearing loss, but with the dangerous life they lead, Johnny probably wasn't going to live long enough to go completely deaf.

After an hour or so of dancing, Johnny was starting to run out of breath, throat dry from the exertion. "I'm going to get another drink!" he practically shouted into Julia's ear. Julia gave him a nod and kept dancing, not slowing down for a moment. Johnny admired her stamina.

Johnny found a seat at the bar and sat down, ordering another drink so he could have a breather. A couple of girls, young enough that they probably should have been turned away at the door, pointed at him and whispered amongst each other excitedly. Johnny turned to them and gave them a charming smile, causing them to squeal and chatter excitedly. Johnny counted down from ten in his head.

"Um, excuse me?" one of the girls asked, either the leader or the one who'd been suckered by her friends. "Are you—you're Johnny Storm?"

Johnny smiled at her. "That I am," he said, flicking his hands and sending up a shower of sparks. "What can I do for you?"

The girl's eyes lit up. "Can we get a picture?"

Johnny spent the next fifteen minutes taking pictures with the girls, posing all kinds of ways for multiple different phones. He fished out a notepad and pen and signed autographs, attracting a couple more people around them. One of the girls attempted to flirt with him, but Johnny carefully steered her away. Eventually he managed to extract himself and make his way back to the dance floor, where Julia was still dancing.

After another hour of dancing, Johnny was finally starting to feel the exhaustion settle in. Hopefully he'd be able to sleep tonight instead of tossing and turning, but the night wasn't quite over yet. He tapped Julia's arm and gestured to the back entrance. Julia nodded and they made their way outside.

Johnny no longer felt cold, but the night air was more refreshing than the stuffy atmosphere inside. He took a moment to just breath and stare up at the night sky, considering for a moment just calling it a night and flaming on. Julia bumped his elbow and motioned to where a gaggle of people were smoking in the back alley. Johnny followed along behind her. He recognized the security guard from the VIP section, one of the bartenders, and the rest seemed like clubbers.

"Hey there, mind if we join you?" Julia asked.

"Not at all man," one of the clubbers said, shuffling aside to let them in the circle. He did a double take when he saw Johnny. "Hey, aren't you like, an Avenger?"

Johnny snorted. "I'm the Human Torch, from the _Fantastic Four_ ," he said. "I've never been an Avenger in my life."

"Sick man," the clubber said, putting up his fist for a bump. "That's totally awesome."

Johnny gave him a fist bump. "Thanks, always glad to meet an admirer," he said.

They chatted for a while, and Johnny was pleased to learn that the security guard was actually a huge racing fan. He regaled him with a few tales from the track, even explaining some of the tricks he used when driving. The clubber from earlier tried to pass him a blunt, but Johnny refused.

"My sister would kill me six ways from Sunday if she ever caught me doing drugs," Johnny said. "Besides, it doesn't even affect me."

"Bummer man," the clubber said, lighting the blunt and taking a long drag. "That must suck."

Johnny shrugged. "I mean, being able to boil poison out of my body has been a pretty good trade off, plus I never get sick."

"Sweet," the clubber said.

"So like, you know Spider-man, right?" one of the other clubbers, a woman, asked suddenly.

"Yeah I know him, he's a friend," Johnny said. "He doesn't do birthday parties, sorry."

The circle laughed, including the woman. "Is he like, hot? Under the mask I mean?" she asked, a tell-tale glint in her eye.

Johnny thought about Peter, about the face under the mask that Johnny had known for nearly a decade. Johnny could picture him clearly in his mind; the strong jaw and high cheekbones, the thick eyebrows that framed those intense brown eyes, the thick brown hair that stuck up even when it had been slicked by mask sweat. Unbidden, Johnny's thoughts wandered to Peter's hands, calloused, strong enough to rend solid steel, but so impossibly gentle, just like the man himself.

Johnny suppressed a shiver. The restlessness bubbled back up under his skin.

"Horrendously ugly I'm afraid," he said. "Like Frankenstein's monster had a baby with a shaved Wookie."

The woman was visibly disappointed. "Ugh, too bad," she said. "With a body like that, it's just a waste."

Johnny laughed. "Why do you think he wears a full mask? He's very self conscious about it, so never ask him about it to his face. Feel free to tell your friends though," he said.

"He saved my little sister once," the bartender piped up. "She was walkin' home one night and some guys tried to jump her. She said he webbed 'em all up so fast that she didn't even realize it was him until she saw the webs." He blew out a cloud of cigarette smoke. "If I ever see him, drinks are on me."

"I'll let him know," Johnny said, smiling softly. Peter didn't do what he did for fame or praise, but it was still nice to be appreciated once in a while.

Johnny and Julia went inside with the security guard and the bartender when their breaks were over. The music washed over Johnny and he sighed. Just another hour or so and he could go home.

"Rounds again?" Julia asked.

"Yup," Johnny said. They moved through the crowd, trailing behind the security guard, who let them up to the VIP section with a smile and a nod.

The VIP section was still filled with the people from before, most of them drunker than ever. Johnny made sure to chat a little longer with some of the more sober ones, having to gracefully decline a line of cocaine no less than twice. The section where Erika and Bryttni had been was empty, but Bryttni's purse was still there, lying in a pool of something sticky.

"Ready to go?" Julia asked. Her face was bright and flushed. She could probably dance the whole night long.

Johnny smiled. "One more dance?" he suggested, offering her his elbow.

Julia grinned and took his elbow, letting him escort her down the stairs and back to the dance floor. Johnny tried to lose himself in the music, in the crush of bodies around him. For a moment, he could be just another person in the crowd. No one was looking at him, and he could just exist completely as himself.

Someone bumped into him from behind, nearly toppling him over. He turned around to glare at whoever it was and saw Bryttni, stumbling around on the dance floor, barely standing. She tilted over and nearly fell into him again, Johnny catching her at the last moment.

"Hey, you okay?" Johnny asked, even though he was sure she couldn't hear him over the thudding music.

Bryttni giggled, eyes unfocused and blown wide. She'd clearly had something stronger than alcohol that night. She managed to look at Johnny's face for a moment and smiled. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him down into a kiss.

She tasted like sugar and alcohol, and her tongue was cold and a little dry. For a moment Johnny was frozen, back stiffening and unable to move. After a moment he gathered his bearings and pulled back, tugging her arms from around his neck.

"Let's get you home, okay?" he said, taking her by the arm and gently leading her towards the door. Julia spotted them leaving and trotted after them.

"Can you run for her purse?" Johnny asked her. She nodded and ran off back to the VIP section while Johnny got Bryttni outside.

They stumbled out into the night, Johnny practically having to carry Bryttni to the curb. He flagged down a waiting cab and opened the back door, setting her inside.

"Hey, what's your address?" Johnny asked, trying to get her to sit up so her could buckle her up.

Bryttni giggled. "Noooooo, not my place," she said. "S'messy. Your place?" she suggested, reaching out to clumsily run her hand up his chest.

Johnny gently pushed her hand down, the limb flopping back like wet spaghetti. "No, I need _your_ address," he insisted. "Where do you live?"

Bryttni blinked a few times, head lolling. Julia appeared at Johnny's side and shoved her purse into her hands. Bryttni curled her manicured hands around it, clutching it to her body. Eventually she managed to stammer her address. Johnny stood and let Julia finish getting her buckled up, going to talk to the driver.

"Hey, can you get her home safe?" Johnny asked the driver, rattling off the address and handing him a handful of bills.

"Yeah I can do it," the driver said, snatching the bills away. Johnny wondered what his problem was and stepped back as Julia shut the door. As the driver sped off, he called through the window. "Nice makeup, faggot!"

Johnny jolted, heart startling like a frightened bird in the cage of his chest. He raised his hand to his lips and cursed when they came away red, the same shade as Bryttni's lipstick.

"Here," Julia said, handing him a tissue and a compact mirror. Johnny took them and popped the mirror.

For a second, Johnny stared at himself. The lipstick had stamped his lips perfectly, like he'd applied it himself. The colour was rich, and while it hadn't quite been the right shade for Bryttni, it complimented Johnny's complection well. A small, insistent voice inside of Johnny begged him to stop and admire the colour a little bit longer. a louder voice screamed at him for getting into things he wasn't supposed to.

Johnny swiped the tissue over his lips, rubbing away the colour until his lips burned.

"Want to head back inside?" Julia asked, accepting the compact mirror back and stowing it in her purse.

Johnny took a deep breath of night air. Behind him the club still pounded with music and bodies, and likely would continue to do so long into the night. It was easy to get lost in it, something Johnny had done more than once, waking up somewhere that wasn't his own bed with people who weren't his friends. The restlessness had come back full force, and if Johnny went back inside, there was a good chance he'd let himself be swept away.

"No," Johnny said. "Let's go home."

Julia nodded and shouldered her purse, taking his arm again. They walked down the street in silence for a while, Johnny trying to clear his head. He tried to put it out of his mind, but the taxi driver's words rolled around in his head like a ball of razor wire. The little voices in his head swirled around him like a cacophonous fog, ringing in his ears.

 _Just admit it!_ one of them shouted. _You've known it all along! Why can't you just admit it!?_

"You okay Johnny?" Julia asked, snapping Johnny out of his stupor.

Johnny shook the fog away. "I'm fine," he said, flashing a smile.

Julia raised an eyebrow. "Alright then," she said, "but could you turn down the heat? I'm starting to sweat."

"Oh, sorry," Johnny said. He hadn't even realized his temperature had been rising so much. He quickly brought it back down to a more acceptable level.

"Thanks," Julia said. She didn't offer anything else, no words of encouragement or comfort. Johnny would consider her a friend, but they weren't that close, they didn't have the kind of relationship where they bothered one another with their personal problems.

For a moment, Johnny considered flaming on and sky-writing a message for Spider-Man to meet him at the Statue of Liberty. Peter had always been the person he could bring his problems to, the ones he could tell his family. This time however, Johnny didn't think it was a good idea, not with the restless energy under his skin. Whenever this particular itch popped up, being around Peter always made it worse.

A shout across the street made Johnny look up. It had come from a group of men coming out of another club. The group of men were smiling and laughing, practically hanging off one another. The shout had come from one man dressed in a completely over the top outfit, some sort of feathered crop top and pants so tight they were nearly see-through. His makeup consisted mostly of glitter and bright red lipstick. He'd shouted when another man had swung him around for a kiss.

Johnny stopped to watch the pair, seized by longing. Superficially, he told himself he wanted what they had, that kind of fun, loving relationship that he seemed to see around him all the time. Reed and Sue, Ben and Alicia, so many couples Johnny could think of that seemed so in love, so happy with one another. Wasn't it every other month that Peter came to him with his own romantic troubles? Johnny wanted that, wanted someone in his life to spend it with.

Deep down, Johnny knew that was only half of the problem.

"You want to get into there?" Julia asked, bringing Johnny back to the present.

"Huh?" Johnny asked, finally tearing his eyes away from the couple.

Julia nodded to the club. "That club. I heard it's good. They might not let me in though."

Johnny looked back to the club. It was smaller than _Mastuers_ , practically a hole in the wall by comparison, but it seemed lively and bright. A large rainbow flag hung by the entrance, and Johnny could see in the windows and through the briefly open door that all the patrons were men.

The couple Johnny had been staring at were nowhere to be seen.

"No," Johnny said. "No, I'm done for the night."

Julia hummed. "Just as well. I don't think it's our scene."

"Right," Johnny said. "Not at all."

* * *

Johnny woke up late the next morning, having not slept particularly well. He'd tossed and turned most of the night, unable to calm the thoughts turning around in his mind. He'd tried to relax, tried to put it out of his mind, but it was worse tonight than it had ever been before. It had been building for a while, ever since the Negative Zone. He'd had so long to think about it, so many nights where all he had was the company of his own head.

He'd realized a lot of things about himself, after all that time alone.

When he came home, Johnny had wanted to change things, wanted to tell the people in his life the truth, but he'd quickly lost his nerve. There was so much going on in his head, so many nightmares, it had fallen by the wayside, and eventually buried under all of the normal chaos of the lives of the Fantastic Four. Johnny had tried to push it down again, ignore it like he'd used to, lie to himself, but the truth refused to be stuffed back into the brain-box he'd let it out of. He could heave and shove all he liked, but it refused to be pushed away, not after so long of being locked up tight. Try as he might, Johnny couldn't ignore it any longer.

"I have to tell them," Johnny said aloud to his empty room.

The nervous bird in his chest banged around in its cage, but Johnny was just too tired of it all. He'd spent so long playing the part, acting like it was all fine, he was too damn tired to care about it anymore. His sister kept insisting he grow up, wasn't it time that he stopped playing pretend?

With a deep breath, Johnny hauled himself out of bed. As he went through his morning routine, he felt strangely light, like a weight was sloughing from his shoulders. Johnny stared at himself in the mirror as he shaved and brushed his teeth. Was he finally going to admit it, after so long? Wasn't it too late to start over? Then again, could Johnny really stand to spend the rest of his life this way?

On the other hand, Johnny thought, no one existed in a bubble, and Johnny _especially_ so. He had to consider how something like this would affect the Four, his family. Something like this would drastically change the image he'd crafted of himself. The public would certainly have something to say about it, to say nothing of the media. It was a PR nightmare just waiting to happen.

Would his family feel betrayed by how long he'd kept this to himself? Would they get upset with him? There was no way they'd reject him, Johnny was certain of that. Then again, there was nothing certain in the universe, something that had been proven to him over and over again. What would Johnny do with himself, if he lost his family? Maybe he should tell them one by one, that might be safer.

Johnny's thoughts followed him like a miasma as he made his way through the halls. He went back on his decision to tell his family several times, only to come to the conclusion that he _had_ to tell them every time he did. The back and forth was starting to make Johnny dizzy, and by the time he reached the living room, his stomach had twisted itself so tight that he felt like he was about to throw up.

Johnny stopped in the entryway of the living room, watching his family for a moment. Sue and Reed were curled up together on the couch, reading a book and tapping away at a tablet, respectively. Ben was in his chair, reading the paper, chuckling at the funny pages. Franklin and Valeria were spread out on the floor, colouring Or rather, Franklin was colouring and Val was writing out complex equations in crayon.

Johnny's chest felt like it would burst. He loved his family so much, he couldn't imagine what his life would be without them. How could he keep lying to them? How could he keep pretending to be something he wasn't to their faces, passing it off as himself?

He had to tell them.

Sue noticed him first. "Good morning Johnny," she said. "Or should I say good afternoon?"

Normally Johnny would shoot back with something about having a wild night, something to make Sue roll her eyes. Then Ben would start in on the friendly jabs and they would go back and forth until Val and Franklin took sides, at which point war would be declared and they would tussle until it was time for lunch or some sort of crisis came from some alternate dimension, whichever came first. It was such a natural state of being, Johnny almost gave in and let it sweep him away.

Johnny crossed the room and sat next to Sue on the couch. "I have something I need to tell you," he blurted out, the words bubbling up from somewhere in his twisted stomach.

Sue looked up with a raised eyebrow and closed her book, nudging Reed until he realized he was being addressed. Ben grunted and folded up his paper, setting it down on his knee. Franklin and Val both stopped colouring and stared up at him quizzically. All eyes were on Johnny, and he felt like he was sixteen again, nervous to the point of throwing up before he gave another one of those speeches in a high school assembly.

"What is it Johnny?" Sue asked.

Johnny swallowed thickly, heart thudding in his chest. _It was fine_ , he told himself. _He would tell them and it was all going to be fine because they were his family and they loved him._

"Spit it out matchstick, before we all fall asleep o' boredom," Ben grumbled, starting to unfold his paper.

"Johnny?" Sue asked, beginning to frown. "Is something wrong?"

Johnny took a deep breath.

No turning back now.

"I'm gay," Johnny announced.

For a moment, there was complete silence as everyone absorbed what Johnny had said. Sue's eyebrows disappeared into her hairline and Reed stretched his neck over her head to look more directly at Johnny. "Are you sure?" he asked.

Johnny nodded. "Yeah. I… I've been meaning to tell you, I just…"

Sue's hand landed on his arm. "Hey, don't worry about that," she said. "The important thing is that you told us, and that we love you, no matter what."

Johnny smiled at her, throat starting to feel a little tight. "Thanks sis," he said.

Ben huffed, shaking out his paper. "Don't know what we're all surprised about," he said. His mouth quirked up at the corner and he continued. "I mean, we already knew you was flamin'."

" _Ben_ ," Sue admonished, but it was drowned out by Johnny's laughter. He couldn't help it, the joke was so obvious and terrible. A million versions of the same thing were going to dog Johnny's heels for the rest of his life. It was so perfectly absurd.

Johnny laughed until his stomach hurt. "Sorry, that was just _so_ terrible," he said through his giggles.

Ben huffed. "No one here appreciates my comedy gold."

"You went for the lowest hanging fruit you could find and you know it," Johnny said, tossing a fireball at Ben's head. It bounced off of his rocky skull and scattered everywhere in and shower of sparks, nearly igniting Ben's paper.

"Watch it, bic head," Ben grumbled, brushing away the sparks.

"Make me," Johnny said, starting to relax a little. There was a touch on his knee and he looked down to see Val staring up at him with a serious expression on her face. "What's up kiddo?" he asked, a sudden spike of fear lancing through him. Val was the smartest toddler on the planet, but she was still a little kid, maybe she didn't understand?

"Uncle Johnny," Val said, "why are you crying?"

Johnny startled, noticing for the first time that his eyes were blurry and stinging. He rubbed the wetness away from his face. "Don't worry about it sweetie, I'm not crying because I'm sad," he explained. "I'm crying because—I'm crying because I'm happ—"

Johnny's throat closed and his chest constricted. Tears flowed down his cheeks, dropping onto his lap. Johnny tried to take a deep breath to steady himself but it caught somewhere in his sternum, coming out as a sob. Val's frown deepened and she crawled onto his lap, wrapping her tiny arms around his neck.

"Don't cry Uncle Johnny," Val said, patting the back of his head. "Same-sex behavior is observed in over four hundred and fifty species, and—"

Johnny let out a choked laugh, curling his arms around Val's tiny body and hugging her close. "I'm happy Val," he choked out. "I'm really just… I'm just so _happy,"_ he said, tears falling into Val's silky blond hair.

A hand landed on his back, tugging him over so he was leaning into Sue's side. He turned and buried his nose into her neck, unable to stop trembling. Another tiny body crawled into his lap and he managed to get an arm around Franklin to hold him secure. Two impossibly long arms encircled them all, holding them tightly.

Johnny wasn't sure how long he cried, but eventually he managed to get himself under control. "Sorry," he said, voice still a little rough. "I guess I got a little overwhelmed."

"It's okay," Sue said, running her fingers through his hair. Her eyes were slightly shiny as well. "You must have been hiding it for so long. We completely understand."

Johnny nodded and let out a breath. "Yeah it's… it's been a lot," he said. His throat tickled and he coughed. "Okay, I need some water, I'm going to shrivel up." He gave Val and Franklin a tight squeeze before depositing them on the couch and heading for the kitchen.

Johnny stood in the kitchen for a while, trying to steady his nerves. He gulped down one glass of water, nearly boiling it in his hand, then carefully sipped at a second, concentrating to keep the water cool.

The thud of stone feet on tile alerted Johnny to Ben's presence. "I'm just getting water, not cooking, so don't expect you can weasel a sandwich out of me," he said, turning around to grin at the orange giant.

Ben huffed, but said nothing for a moment, only stared down at Johnny. After a second he sighed. "C'mere," he said, opening his arms. Johnny didn't hesitate and let himself be scooped up in a tight hug.

"All jokin' aside, you know I love ya, right?" Ben said, resting his cheek against Johnny's head. "You're my little brother, nothin' changes that. Don't you believe it for a _second_ that it would."

"I know Ben," Johnny said. "I love you too."

"Good," Ben gruffed. "Saves me the trouble of beatin' it into your skull." He gave Johnny another tight squeeze before pulling back, keeping one hand on Johnny's shoulder. "Now c'mon, let's go see how quick we can make your sister turn colours with inappropriate jokes in front of the kids."

Johnny snorted. "Twenty bucks says ten minutes," he said.

"Ha!" Ben laughed. "Fifty says five."

"You're on," Johnny said, grinning wide and following Ben back to the living room. He was still trembling slightly from the rollercoaster of emotions, but he felt light, lighter than he'd felt in years. He'd done it, he'd _finally_ done it. There was no turning back anymore, no more hiding, no more pretending to be something that he wasn't. It wasn't over, not by any stretch of the imagination, but it was a step in the right direction.

The hardest part was over, and Johnny could finally _breathe_.

Sue lasted seven minutes. Ben and Johnny's argument over who was closer nearly took out a wall. All felt normal in the universe.


	2. Part I.ii: Refraction

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like the mid section of this was kind of filler-y but the chapter was too short otherwise, so I guess enjoy? Special thanks to traincat for recommending me some reading material to hep me with my Peter voice, which I don't think I nailed but I think I did okay at least.
> 
> Trigger warning for the word qu*er (I don't consider it a slur but some people do so)

Peter was beating up a mugger when the sky lit up with familiar burning letters. He webbed the mugger to the alley wall and climbed up to get a better look.

_ Spidey, meet me at the Usual Place, it's important _ , blazed across the sky. In the distance, Peter could see a fireball heading for the Statue of Liberty. Peter checked to make sure that the mugger was secure before swinging off.

After having to wait almost twenty minutes for a helicopter to get close enough, Peter landed on the torch of the Statue and crawled down her arm. Johnny was waiting for him, sitting next to a small pile of foil wrapped hotdogs.

"You really do love me," Peter hummed, dropping down next to Johnny. He pulled off his mask and scooped up a hot dog.

"Help yourself," Johnny said with a snort.

"Don't mind if I do," Peter hummed, stuffing the first hot dog in his mouth. For all Johnny put him through, he always came through on getting him quality street food. "So what's up firefly? What's important?"

Johnny picked up a hot dog and carefully unwrapped it. Peter waited patiently for Johnny to tell him whatever it was that was on his mind. With Johnny, 'important' could mean anything from the end of the world as they knew to the discontinuation of his favourite hairspray. However, Peter had known him long enough by now that he could tell when it was actually important. When Johnny got quiet and pensive like this, the important thing was usually something big but personal, and Johnny had to work up to getting the right words.

"So I'm going to make an announcement soon," Johnny said after he'd eaten a few bites, "and I wanted to tell you first, before you heard about from the papers."

Peter swallowed the last bit of his hot dog. "Sounds ominous, you okay?" he asked, trying not to let his nerves get the better of him. "You're not dying are you?"

Johnny rolled his eyes. "I'm not dying, worrywart."

"Oh, good," Peter said, with no small amount of relief. "So what is it? Trying to start another solo career? Moving out of your sisters basement finally? Shotgun wedding to an interdimensional creature? I warned you about cultural relativism and interspecies courting rituals man, you can't just assume doing a flirty dance is  _ just  _ flirting on other planets."

Johnny flicked a fireball at him. "Of the two of us, who has  _ actually  _ encountered more alien life?" he huffed. "No jackass, to all of those things."

Peter batted away the fireball. "Alright, so what is it?"

Johnny went quiet again and Peter suppressed a sigh. He picked up another hot dog and started to mow down, hungry from all of the swinging he'd been doing. Peter was admiring the quality of the mustard when Johnny spoke again.

"I'm gay," he said.

Peter inhaled in mild surprise, unfortunately taking a piece of hot dog along for the ride. He coughed and sputtered, banging on his chest to try and dislodge the foreign object from his lungs.

"Sorry, sorry," he wheezed. "Wrong pipe."

"Mm-hm," Johnny said, uncharacteristically not laughing at Peter's misfortune.

Peter finally managed to get his breathing in working order. "Ugh,  _ any- _ way," he huffed, wiping his teary eyes, "gay?"

"Yup," Johnny said curtly. "Is it that surprising?"

"Uh, kinda?" Peter said with a shrug, "I mean, I'm  _ surprised _ but it's not  _ unexpected  _ I guess? If that makes any sense at all?" he said. "Like thinking about it in retrospect it makes sense, but I never really connected the dots. I didn't even realize there  _ were  _ dots until they got connected."

It seemed kind of obvious, now that Peter actually gave it some thought. Peter wasn't the kind of person to make assumptions about anyone's orientation, but the more he thought about it, the more it made sense. Going back all the way to when they were kids, Peter could see the evidence piling up.

"Right," Johnny said. He had his eyes firmly on the horizon, every muscle tense. "Is that an issue?" he asked.

Peter's eyebrow went up towards his hairline. Was Johnny being  _ defensive _ ? "No, of course not, why would it be?" Peter asked, somewhat bewildered.

Johnny finally looked at him, immediately relaxing. "Oh. Good," he said.

"Did you  _ think  _ I'd have a problem with it?" Peter asked, not sure if he should feel offended. Had he ever given Johnny any indication that he might be a homophobe?

"No, not really," Johnny said with a one shouldered shrug. "Just… you're never sure until you're  _ sure _ , right?" He rolled a ball of foil between his hands. "I mean, I  _ know  _ Ben loves me as if I were his own brother, but he also takes his religion very seriously. Religions often have…  _ opinions  _ about gay people. How do I weigh his faith against how much he loves me? How can I be  _ absolutely certain _ until he knows? And of course, once you know there's no un-knowing. That's not something you can backtrack on. If it's ruined, it's ruined  _ forever _ ."

Peter pressed his lips together, feeling bad for assuming the worst. "Right, I guess that's fair," he said. "But you don't have to worry, okay?" He reached out to wrap his arm around Johnny. "As far as I'm concerned, you're still the same flame brain I know and tolerate."

Johnny snorted. "Thanks Pete," he said, leaning into him and resting his head on his shoulder.

Peter gave him a squeeze. "No problem man."

They stayed that way for a moment before Peter pulled away, arm sliding from Johnny's shoulder, pausing to rub his back once. He picked up the hotdog he'd nearly dropped during his coughing fit and took another bite.

"So," Peter started, licking mustard off his glove and instantly regretting it when he got a stray strand of web fluid. "Agk, gross.  _ So _ , gay huh? I guess that came as quite a shock?"

"Not really," Johnny said, launching one of the wrappers and incinerating it. "I always kind of  _ knew  _ I was gay, but after… after coming home from the Negative Zone, it got harder and harder to ignore."

Peter swallowed, the hot dog feeling like a wad of paper in his throat at the mention of the time Johnny had been 'dead'. "So you’ve just been—what—playing straight your whole life?"

"Sort of," Johnny said. He leaned back on his hands, feet dangling over the edge of the crown. "I mean I’d basically figured it out when I was thirteen."

"Thirteen?" Peter asked, raising an eyebrow. "You knew that far back? Why did it take you so long to come out?"

"Well, when I was sixteen, my sister's boyfriend at the time had this crazy idea to go to space and take us all with him," Johnny said. "One blast of radiation later, we suddenly crash land in the middle of fame and fortune and  _ especially  _ fame."

Peter snorted. "Y'know I think I've heard this one before."

"Hush, I'm not finished," Johnny said, smacking Peter's arm. "Anyway, we get our powers and Reed is over hot water for stealing a rocket, so he turns us into celebrity super heroes to keep us from disappearing into a government lab to be dissected. It was  _ important  _ that we were famous, that people liked us, that they  _ cared _ about what happened to us."

Peter could guess where this was going, but it made his stomach hurt to think about it. "You think they would have turned on you if you came out."

Johnny let out a long sigh. "I got called 'pansy' enough in high school without even being out. The climate of the time… it wouldn't have gone over well, to say the least. We were these scary people who had weird powers and a certain disregard for the authorities, we  _ needed  _ the people to like us. That meant I needed to be a certain kind of person. I needed to be cool enough that teenage boys wanted to be me, attractive enough that girls wanted to date me, and non-threatening enough that adults weren't worried about me corrupting their precious children. If I had even  _ thought  _ about coming out as gay at the time, they would have been  _ begging  _ the government to haul us away and use us as lab rats."

Peter thought back to when the Four first arrived on the superhero scene. He remembered how jealous he'd been, that everyone seemed to love them while they hated him. It hadn't seemed fair, especially since Peter was the one who was actually out on the streets protecting everyday people while Johnny Storm and his dumb famous face were off gallivanting in space all the time. Peter didn't realize until much later how much being celebrities was as much for protection as his mask was.

Peter considered what might have happened if Johnny Storm, superhero heartthrob and bane of his existence, had come out as gay all those years ago. At best, investors would have been fewer and farther between, agencies more reluctant to help, and the media more critical of their actions. At worst, people would have torn the Fantastic Four apart, claimed they were exposing the public to immoral lifestyles, calling for their dissolution and disappearance from the public eye. Peter himself probably would have been more horrid to Johnny, as insecure as he'd been about being a man and people seeing him a certain way. He might not even have associated with Johnny at all, not wanting to have his reputation tarnished by association.

Maybe Johnny's fears about him being a homophobe weren't as unfounded as he'd like to think.

"I'm sorry," Peter said softly. "That must have been so hard on you."

Johnny shrugged. "I got used to it pretty quickly," he said. "Eventually I just kind of…  _ forgot  _ that it was there. I was Johnny Storm, the Human Torch, my life was amazing and I had everything I'd ever wanted, why would someone like  _ me  _ be a queer? That was just silly. I just kept denying it and trying to convince the world I was what I said I was… I guess I accidentally fell for my own lies."

"Damn," Peter said. "I mean, I've convinced myself of a lot of things, like that kale is good for me and I should eat it at least once every few months, but that's a hell of a thing to choke down."

"Kale  _ is  _ good for you," Johnny huffed. "Honestly, you're going to get heart disease if you keep eating like a teenager all the time."

"What was that? I can't hear you over how delicious these hot dogs are."

Johnny rolled his eyes. "Child."

Peter chuckled. "So what made you realize in the first place? Back when you were thirteen, if you don't mind me asking?"

Johnny's cheeks went a little pink and he mumbled something Peter couldn't hear. "Didn't quite catch that sparky, can you speak up?" he asked.

Johnny's blush deepened and he grumbled. "I met Ben for the first time, alright?"

Peter blinked, then grinned as the lines connected in his brain. "You had a  _ crush  _ on  _ Ben _ ?"

"Ugh," Johnny groaned as Peter started howling with laughter.

"Oh my  _ God _ ," Peter gasped, holding his sides. "You had a boy-crush on  _ Ben _ ! This is too much!"

"He was  _ handsome  _ back then!" Johnny cried, throwing his hands up. "He was handsome and older and  _ nice _ to me! He paid attention to me and made me feel included even though I was the kid brother of his best friend's girlfriend. Of  _ course  _ I had a crush on him!"

Peter was starting to get a little dizzy from the lack of oxygen. "This is amazing. Did you tell him? Are you going to try to woo him away from Alicia? You home-wrecker you."

"Ugh,  _ no  _ I'm not telling him," Johnny said, wrinkling his nose. "One, Ben is like a brother to me now, it would be  _ super  _ weird. And two, he would  _ never  _ let me live it down for the rest of my days." He reached over and punched Peter in the arm. "If you  _ ever  _ tell him, I  _ will  _ cook you in your own webs."

"Oh come on, this is too good to pass up!" Peter whined through his tapering chuckles. His spider-sense tingled slightly as Johnny started to raise the heat. "Okay okay! Sheesh, way to spoil a guys fun."

"You're horrible," Johnny huffed, pouting. "I can't believe I have such garbage taste in men."

"Now that's not nice, Ben isn't even here to defend himself," Peter said.

Johnny rolled his eyes. "I wasn't talking about Ben, moron."

Peter raised an eyebrow. "Who were you talking about?"

Johnny leveled Peter with a look that roughly translated to 'how do you remember to  _ breathe  _ you absolute chucklefuck?' Peter went to ask again when he realized. "Wait," he asked, "were you talking about  _ me _ ?"

"I said I had garbage taste in men, didn't I?" Johnny huffed, tone light and teasing, but there was a flush to his cheeks and he wouldn't meet Peter's eye.

Peter opened his mouth, then closed it. "Really?" he blurted out.

Johnny gave him the look again. "Peter, I once made you breakfast wearing nothing but my underwear and a flirty apron. Take a  _ hint  _ why don't you?"

Peter blinked, trying to wrap his mind around this new information. Suddenly his entire friendship with Johnny shifted about two inches to the right, so many instances making much more sense than they did before. "Wow," he said, choking slightly. "That's… something."

Once again Johnny ducked his head and wouldn't meet Peter's eye. "Sorry," he mumbled.

"No no, don't be sorry," Peter said. "Honestly I'm kind of flattered. Am I flattered? Yes, yes I'm flattered. Wow." He rubbed the back of his neck, feeling inexplicably embarrassed. "But uh, I don't—I mean, I'm not—"

"I know Pete," Johnny said. "I figured you weren't interested."

"It's not that you're not great, and I love you, I really do, I'm just not…" Peter trailed off, not sure what phrase he wanted.

"Into guys?" Johnny offered, giving a crooked smile.

"Yeah," Peter said. "Sorry."

"It's fine Peter," Johnny said. "I was pretty sure that was the case. If you were even slightly into guys you would have noticed by now."

"You think?" Peter asked.

Johnny raised an eyebrow. "Peter, one time I invited you over to my place to watch my  _ sex tape _ with me. I wasn't subtle."

Peter remembered that day, standing on the rooftop with Johnny while he waved the DVD around. He remembered his brain going offline for a moment before he swung away to work out the last of his frustration on Hammerhead, grumbling about taking a shower. He'd sometimes revisit the memory, wondering what the hell Johnny had been thinking, asking him something like that.

Guess he had his answer.

"Wow," Peter said, amazed by how far it had flown over his head.

Johnny snorted. "You either had the be the straightest person  _ ever, _ or the biggest, most  _ oblivious  _ idiot on the planet," he said. "And you can be dumb, don't get me wrong, but that's pushing it, even for you."

"Thanks," Peter said, rolling his eyes. He looked over at Johnny and took note of his body language. He was leaning away from Peter, slightly tense and ready to go on the defensive. "Hey, don't worry," Peter said, reaching out and wrapping his arm around Johnny's shoulders. "I'm not going to freak out on you. Like I said, I'm actually flattered."

Johnny smiled and leaned into Peter's side. "Thanks," he said. "And you  _ should  _ be flattered. I spent way too long wasting my time on you."

"That's your own fault," Peter huffed. "But really who could blame you? It's not every day you come across a specimen like  _ this _ ." He gave an exaggerated flex with his free arm, getting the desired result of making Johnny laugh.

"You're lucky, that's the  _ only  _ thing you've got going for you," Johnny said, giggling. "Your personality leaves a lot to be desired."

"And yet, you had a  _ crush  _ on me," Peter teased. "You were  _ in love  _ with me."

"I regret telling you anything," Johnny huffed, trying to wiggle away.

Peter snorted. Something crossed his mind. "Hey, so you spent all this time being in love with me," he said, grinning widely. "Does that mean you were—"

"Don't," Johnny warned.

"— _ holding a torch _ ?"

"I'm  _ leaving _ ."

* * *

Johnny spent several days brainstorming how he wanted to come out to the rest of the world. He'd done his best to reach out to as many of his closer friends as possible to let them know personally, but that only stalled him for so long—he didn't have that many close friends apparently. He wanted to make it a big announcement, something flashy and bold, leaving nothing up to interpretation. He only got to do this once, he wanted to do it perfectly.

"You could do it in a magazine," Sue suggested. "Make a big deal about making some kind of announcement in an interview?"

"I don't know," Johnny sighed, though he wrote down the idea on his notepad anyway. "It's big, but it's not quite what I want."

"Perhaps a social media post?" Reed said, poking at a holographic projection of something disturbingly organic looking. "You could make a post on—what is it? Chirper?"

" _ Twitter _ ," Johnny corrected, wondering how someone as smart as Reed could be so hopeless when it came to this kind of thing. Johnny would bet money that Reed still thought MySpace was a thing people did. "This is a little big for a Twitter post," he pointed out.

Reed hummed distractedly. "I'm sure you'll figure something out," he said, poking the hologram. It buzzed aggressively at him and flashed red. "Oops."

"What about a televised interview, or something on the radio?" Alicia asked. "You could set up something staged and have the interviewer ask pre-prepared questions."

"Better," Johnny said, "but it's not quite right."

"You're makin' an awful big stink about this," Ben said. "Do you even really  _ need  _ to make an announcement?"

Johnny raised an incredulous eyebrow at him. "Um, I think people are going to be pretty confused when I suddenly start going to gay bars and dating men."

"Exactly," Ben said. "Just live your life and when people start gettin' nosy, answer their questions and move on."

Johnny tried not to be annoyed, reminding himself that Ben wasn't really well versed in these kinds of things. "I  _ want  _ to make a stink about it. I want to tell the world in a big, flashy, over-the-top, fireworks-and-music-blasting  _ bang _ ," he said. "I deserve it after spending so long in the closet."

A tense silence passed through the room. No doubt Sue and Reed had guessed at the reasons that Johnny had stayed in the closet for so long, and Ben at least knew how hard it must have been on Johnny all these years.

Thinking back on it all, it was a wonder how Johnny had been able to stand it all those years. He'd spent so much time and energy trying to fool everyone, including himself. At times it had made him physically ill, and it was all he could do to keep up the charade. He threw himself at women, overcompensating to an embarrassing degree, throwing himself headfirst into unhealthy relationships in a desperate attempt to make it  _ work _ .

Johnny had caused himself a lot of pain trying to convince himself he was something he wasn't.

"Well, why don't you just do that?' Alicia said.

Johnny looked up. "What do you mean?"

"The fireworks," Alicia said. "I mean, don't you write messages in the sky all the time?"

Johnny blinked, taking a moment to process that. He felt a grin split his face. "Alicia you're a genius!" he exclaimed.

"Oh boy," Ben groaned. Johnny could see Sue already shaking her head.

"It's perfect!" Johnny said, hopping up from the chair he'd curled up on. "I can't  _ believe  _ I didn't think of it before. It's big and flashy and one-of-a-kind and  _ perfect  _ for me!"

"Well, I'm glad you have a plan," Sue said, having resigned herself already to whatever crazy Johnny was committed to now.

"Yes!" Johnny said, heading towards the window.

Sue bolted out of her seat. "Wait! Hold on!" she cried, throwing up a force field before Johnny could leap out the window. "Let's not get ahead of ourselves. We still need to tell the PR department and make sure they're prepared for this."

"Plus it's rainin' out," Ben pointed out. "Your flames won't last a minute out there."

Johnny glanced out the window again. Sure enough, the sky was grey and pouring down water. "Oh, right," he said. "Sorry, I guess I'm just excited."

"I understand," Sue said, cautiously lowering the field. "I know you're excited Johnny, I just want to make sure we don't rush into anything without thinking it through."

"Right," Johnny said, trying not to feel too disappointed. "I guess I've waited this long, I can wait another day or two."

Sue gave him a smile, her eyes somewhat sad. "Not too much longer," she said. "It should be a clear night tomorrow."

Johnny nodded. "Yeah. Plus, it gives me time to make plans for how it will look. I want it to be perfect."

"Exactly," Sue said, walking over to hug him. "We'll make sure it's perfect, I promise."

Johnny hugged her back, resting his cheek against hers. "I'm just… I'm so ready to start living as  _ me _ , you know?"

"I know Johnny," Sue said, resting her chin on his shoulder. "I know it must be hard to keep it a secret for so long."

Johnny took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "It's fine," he said.

Sue squeezed him tighter for a moment before pulling back and reaching on hand up to cup his cheek. "We'll keep an eye on the weather, call in a favor to Storm or Thor or something if we have to. In the meantime, we can come up with ideas."

Johnny nodded, leaning into the touch. He opened his eyes and smiled down at his sister. "Yeah. Hey, I think I might already have an idea," he said. "Hey Reed, can you help with something?"

Reed set down the hologram he now seemed to be dissecting. "Well, I don't seem to be getting anywhere with  _ this _ , so sure," he said, swivelling his neck around. "What did you have in mind Johnny?"

Johnny grinned, the perfect idea already forming in his mind.

* * *

As predicted, the next day was clear and rain free, but ended up being far too windy for skywriting. It was just as well, as the device Reed and Johnny were working on hit a snag and wouldn't have been ready in time. The following night however, everything was ready, and Johnny was practically vibrating with excitement.

They were all on the roof of the Baxter Building. They night sky was clear enough that a couple of stars were actually visible tonight, squinting down at the city from the heavens. Johnny stared up at them, feeling like he was sixteen and about to go up in an experimental rocket.

Reed was putting the last touches on the device they'd strapped to Johnny's back. "So you'll have ten seconds from the first moment you flame on before it deploys, then it will stay active for thirty seconds. To get the saturation you want, you'll have to fly fairly slow, otherwise the colours will just bleed into each other," Reed explained.

"I remember. I helped build this you know," Johnny huffed, adjusting the straps. It weighed a lot more than he was expecting.

"Just making sure," Reed said. He batted Johnny's hands away and fixed the straps himself. He caught Johnny's eyes and smiled. "You know I love you very much, right?"

Johnny smiled, heart feeling like it was about to burst. "I know, thanks Reed. I love you too."

Reed smiled wider, laugh lines crinkling at the corner of his eyes. He snaked one hand up to ruffle Johnny's hair, the way he used to do when Johnny was a kid, tailing along behind the adults on their fantastical adventures.

"When did you grow up so fast?" Reed asked, stretching up to bump their foreheads together.

"Somewhere between the first time we fought Mole Man and when Val was born," Johnny snorted, leaning into the touch.

Reed rolled his eyes. He pulled away and stepped back. "Alright, ready?"

"Yup," Johnny said, shifting his weight as he prepared to take off. He remembered something. "Wait! One last thing, who's got my phone?"

Ben grumbled and dug through his pockets. "What, you wanna order a pizza?" he asked, stepping forward to hand Johnny his phone.

"I want to get a good picture," Johnny said, rolling his eyes as he took his phone.

"On your phone? I don't know if the quality will be anything special," Sue pointed out. "I can try taking a picture from here, that would probably work better."

"I'm not taking a photo with it," Johnny said. He tapped through to the texting app and scrolled through until he found the right conversation. He fired off a quick text and handed the phone back to Ben. "I'm arranging for someone  _ else _ to take a picture."

"If you wanted a photographer, you should have mentioned that before," Sue huffed. "Besides, everyone with a camera is going to try and get a photo of this. What's important about this one in particular?"

Johnny rolled his eyes again and ignored her. "Alright, now I'm ready," he said. "Actually, I changed my mind, can you take a video?"

"Would you get on with it already? Before I toss you off the roof?" Ben said, throwing his hands up. "I'm missing my stories for this!"

"Uh, this is my  _ moment _ ? Let me enjoy it," Johnny huffed, crossing his arms.

"Johnny," Sue sighed.

"Fine, fine, it's not like this isn't about to be one of the most significant moments of my life. A once in a lifetime event. The only time I will  _ ever _ do this," Johnny said, turning and walking towards the edge of the roof.

"I'm takin' the damn video, just get your flame on already," Ben snapped, holding up the phone.

"Thank you," Johnny chirped, finally flaming on and taking off into the sky.

Johnny had always loved flying. From the first moment he'd taken off into the sky, even though he'd still been terrified of the fire engulfing his body, he'd been exhilarated by flight. What child didn't look up at the sky and dream of flying?

Flames crackled around Johnny as he counted down from ten in his head, trying to get to the right spot so his message would be seen by as many people as clearly as possible. He hit ten and the device deployed, canisters starting to hiss as they released their gasses. Johnny counted to thirty in his head, travelling in an arc, trying to keep steady so the flames stayed consistent throughout. Johnny hit the end of the arc just as his thirty seconds were up. He zipped around, spelling out the letters in the sky for everyone in New York—and soon the world—to read.

Johnny too a moment to admire his work, feeling his heart sing at the sight. A fifty foot rainbow made of fire arced over the city, flaming letters spelling out 'I'm gay' underneath it. The 'y' was a little wonky on one side, but Johnny could bring himself to be too upset about it. Below him, the city streets began to light up with camera flashes. Johnny flew back down to the Baxter building.

Sue crashed into him the moment he flamed off. "It's beautiful Johnny," she said.

Johnny laughed and spun her around in his arms. By now Johnny could hear people start to shout and cry out. By tomorrow, the whole world would know the truth. No more hiding, no more pretending, Johnny Storm could  _ be  _ Johnny Storm, one hundred percent himself. Johnny felt like he was going to burst he was so happy.

They stayed on the roof for a few more minutes watching the rainbow continue to burn even as the letters started to fade. The chemical gasses Reed had cooked up would hopefully burn for at least an hour, if they weren't blown away by the wind. Johnny wasn't naïve, he knew that tomorrow would bring a whole host of bad press and backlash, not just towards him, but his family as well, but for just this moment, Johnny was going to enjoy the sense of freedom he’d never felt before.

Johnny's phone buzzed with a text. He smiled at the name on the screen and opened it.

_ Webhead: I was sleeping for once you know. >:( _

_ Firefly: Did u get a good pic?? _

_ Webhead: Yeah yeah, I got your pics. _

_ Firefly: :D _

_ Webhead: The Y is crooked btw _

Johnny snorted. "Jerk," he muttered. He pocketed his phone and looked back up at the burning rainbow. Nothing could spoil this moment for him.

"Uh, Johnny?" Sue asked, staring down at her own phone. "You did remember to call the PR department to let them know, right?"

Johnny blinked. "Uh, it  _ maybe  _ might have slipped my mind?" he said, grinning sheepishly.

Sue gave him a deadpan, unimpressed stare before she sighed and picked up the phone. “Hi Kevin… Yes I know what time it is… No, why would it be a hoax?”

Johnny smiled as Sue started to get annoyed with the PR agent. He’d get his own earful later, he was certain of that, but for the moment, he was too happy to care.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beep boop guess who's an idiot?
> 
> I kind of see Reed as this person who's so completely brilliant, but has no clue how modern social media works. He understands the concept and how they function, but if he has an account on anything he makes one post when he first signs up and then his second one five years later when he remembers it exists.
> 
> Ben is kind of interesting to explore here (and also going forward). I'm not certain about how many LGBT people he's met in canon or how he's reacted to them, but I kind of like to imagine that he's fine with them as people, but he was raised a certain way and he just doesn't understand what it's like. Post-transformation I think he'd be sympathetic, what with the whole 'society treats me like a monster' angle, but he's got these leftover prejudices and assumptions that he was raised with. He still loves Johnny, he's just probably going to ask a dumb, borderline offensive question here or there. He doesn't _mean_ to be offensive or ignorant, it's just not something he's ever had much context for.


	3. Part I.iii: Actualize

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took way longer to get finished than it should have, but I _had_ to finish Nowhere but Forward first before getting this done. The issue I'm having though is that I'm doing a lot of writing at work on my downtime (I work at an inbound call centre, there's a lot), but I can't write the sex scenes at work, so I have to do them at home, where I get really distracted. I finally got this done though. It's 3:30am and I'm going to hate myself in the morning but I got it done.
> 
> Trigger warnings for casual sex, a lot of swears, and I guess child abuse if you really stretch it? This is also probably really badly edited so that too.

The media explosion went off as predicted. For about a week it was all anyone would talk about; every magazine, newspaper, news station, entertainment channel, talk show, and gossip blog was talking about it. Twitter blew up so hard it actually crashed for forty-five minutes. Reaction videos and opinion vlogs popped up on YouTube with a day. Calls started flooding in from various talk shows to have him on their shows for interviews. Paparazzi and news crews camped out in front of the Baxter Building, hounding anyone who went in or out of the building for their opinion.

For the most part, the response was overwhelmingly positive. There was an outpouring of support, people cheering Johnny on for coming out, applauding him for his bravery. Bootleg Fantastic Four merch with flames and rainbows popped up all over the city. All of the Four's friends in the super community were completely supportive, congratulating Johnny through text, email, or by phone. A couple of them offered to go after the more aggressively negative voices that were popping up here and there.

As expected, there was the inevitable backlash of negativity. More than one conservative news outlet was howling about the degradation of society and railing against the Fantastic Four, calling them out for being commie liberal lizard people blah blah blah something about corrupting America with their immoral ways. Several investors decided that expenditures into the Fantastic Four were not returning enough profit to be sustainable, and the fact that they were backing out just as Johnny came out as gay was a complete coincidence. Sue politely let them know not to let the door hit them on the ass on the way out.

Johnny had expected the backlash, had been preparing for it from the first moment he realized he couldn't ignore who he was anymore. It was honestly sort of freeing, knowing that he didn't have to try and gain the approval of these people ever again. They would never accept him and that was that, so why even bother himself with it? He had other things to focus on.

Johnny stood in front of the mirror, studying his face. He liked his face, it had always served him well. He'd gotten countless jobs modeling with this face, and even an acting gig or two. People were quick to call him handsome, good-looking, or pretty-boy, depending on whether or not they actually wanted to compliment him. He'd tried a few things over the years, piercings and hairstyles and the like, and of course he moisturized and used products here and there, but for the most part he'd left his face bare.

Taking a deep breath, Johnny reached for the foundation and a brush he'd left out on the counter.

Johnny wasn't a stranger to makeup. Appearing on TV required it, powders and creams to stop him from washing out under the harsh lighting, covering up blemishes and bruises. It was all part of the circuit, something they all went through whenever they had to appear in public.

He'd always enjoyed getting his makeup done. He liked the feeling of the brushes on his skin, and he always asked about the processes with the makeup artists. He even watched a few beauty bloggers on Youtube, saving videos here and there of looks he liked.

Johnny dabbed a few spots of the foundation onto his face and started blending, keeping it light. He had nice skin, so he probably didn't really need foundation at all, but he wanted to practice. Once that was done he moved on to his eyebrows, accentuating the curve of them. Once he'd finished with that, he picked up the eyeshadow pallet.

It was a nice pallet, with a lot of colours. Eventually it would have to be treated with unstable molecules if he ever wanted to wear it in public, along with the rest of his makeup, but for now Johnny was just testing things out. He twirled the brush around, considering his options for colours.

"Nothing  _ too  _ crazy," he said to himself, selecting a nude shade. "We're just testing things out."

Johnny carefully applied the eyeshadow, remembering the techniques the beauty bloggers talked about. Lid, upper lid, crease, and the corner of his eye, buffing carefully so everything was nice and even on both sides. The result was a subtle look, slightly smoky due to a greyish shade he'd chosen for the corner of his eyes. It looked good, and Johnny couldn't help but take a moment to admire his work.

Feeling confident, Johnny reached for the liquid eyeliner. This was apparently the hard part, and he really didn't want to have to redo the eyeshadow, so he was going to have to be careful. He hadn't even planned to use it yet, but the eyeshadow was so good, he wanted to give it a shot.

"Alright," Johnny muttered to himself. "Flick, drag, and hope for the best."

The liner came out alright in the end. It wasn't completely even, slightly wonky on one side, but overall it looked good, and Johnny was pleased with it. He set aside the liner and picked up the mascara. False lashes didn't seem worth it for such a simple look, and Johnny thought he already had long, thick lashes.

"Now for contour," Johnny hummed.

He picked up the contour and studied his face again. He wanted to accentuate the lines of his face, not go too crazy, so just a pop of contour under the cheekbones, then a flick of highlighter on top. It was a simple thing, but the result was dramatic, making his face look sharper, more defined. It was amazing how a few simple brushstrokes made so much difference.

Johnny stared at himself in the mirror, pleased with the look. It wasn't as crazy as some of the looks he'd seen on the beauty Youtubers, but it was a lot more than he'd ever allowed himself before. Stage makeup was fine and dandy, but he'd always wanted to try something like this. He almost wished he could model this look, post it to his Instagram, but he didn't feel quite ready for that. Baby steps.

There was just one last thing that Johnny needed. He reached over to his lipsticks and hesitated. He'd planned on a nude lipstick to match with the rest of the look, but his eye drifted towards a bright red. He'd bought it on a whim ages ago, telling himself he was getting it as a present for Sue, even though it wasn't a colour she preferred. It had sat in his bathroom under the sink for months, unopened and untouched.

Johnny looked back at himself in the mirror. Despite what he always said about only ever knowing Sue as the woman who raised him, he did actually have one memory of his mother before she passed. He'd maybe been three or so, small enough to be able to sit comfortably on the bathroom counter. He'd gotten into his mother's makeup, making a huge mess. The one thing he'd been completely entranced by was her bright red lipstick. He'd smeared it all over his mouth with all the coordination of a toddler, and if he recalled correctly he might have actually eaten some.

Mary Storm had walked in on him as he'd finished the tube. Naturally she hadn't been pleased with him and yelled at him. Johnny remembered her shouting as she roughly scrubbed the lipstick off his face, at one point holding him under the tap to get it out of his hair. It was the only clear memory he had of her before she passed away, probably only a few months later.

Johnny didn't remember exactly what she'd screamed at him for—making a mess, ruining her makeup, or something else—but he did learn an important lesson that day.

Boys don't wear lipstick.

Johnny took a deep breath and grabbed the red.

The red changed the look quite a bit, a bright 'pop' of colour in an otherwise subtle look. It drew attention to his mouth, and the overall look was a little more sultry and sexier than Johnny had intended. Johnny actually really liked it. He smiled at himself, red lips pulling apart and getting a little lipstick on his teeth.

"Shoot," Johnny cursed, reaching for a tissue. He smudged the lipstick a little as he tried to clean his teeth.

Well, it felt like a start at least.

* * *

After the initial explosion went off, Johnny had been busy. It seemed as though every talk show in the US wanted him on as a guest, and there were literally hundreds of requests for magazine interviews. He was a hot ticket, and people wanted in on it.

Johnny didn't mind so much, he enjoyed the attention actually, but it did leave his social life a little lacking. Here he was, finally an out gay man, his name on everyone's lips, and he hadn't had one opportunity to get out into his new dating pool. The closest thing he'd gotten was a flirty wink from an assistant handing him a coffee backstage of The Tonight Show.

If Johnny had to wait any longer, he was going to scream.

Finally the hype seemed to be winding down and Johnny wasn't booked for back-to-back interviews. He finally had a night to himself, and he wanted to have some  _ fun _ .

The club was already hopping by the time Johnny arrived. He could already feel eyes following him as he walked towards the door. Groups of men whispered to one another excitedly. The bouncer out front smiled at him and let him inside with a gesture. The man waiting at the front of the line was scrambling to get his phone out for a picture, but Johnny walked right inside, eager for the night to start.

The inside of the club was dark and smoky, the music was loud and excited. Projector lights cast images of flowers, dragons, and—of course—rainbows across the crowd. The dance floor was packed tightly, as was the bar, but Johnny found his way through easily. Eyes followed him eagerly, and Johnny didn't bother hiding a smile.

Johnny had hardly reached the bar when someone appeared at his side. "Hey, you're Johnny Storm, right?"

The man was tall, with brown hair and five o'clock shadow. He grinned down at Johnny, the straightness of his teeth suggesting he'd had braces at one point in his life. His green eyes raked over Johnny, pausing for a moment to appreciate the tightness of the U-neck shirt Johnny had worn. He was a little disheveled, and Johnny could imagine him struggling through the crowd to get to him first.

Johnny smiled. "Why yes, I am indeed."

The man's eyes lit up in the dark. "Wow, so it  _ is  _ true," he blurted out. "A bunch of people were calling it a hoax."

Johnny had heard that rumor floating around, but luckily it hadn't reached his face until now. "Why would anyone go to all this trouble for a hoax?" he scoffed.

"That's what  _ I  _ said!" the man exclaimed.

Johnny laughed. "Well, it's not like I've never been accused of being a liar before."

The man flushed. "Sorry, I guess that was rude," he said. He gave a crooked grin, showing off his straight teeth. "Can I buy you a drink to make up for it?"

"Sure," Johnny said. The man had to lean over him slightly to flag down the bartender, and Johnny caught a glimpse of a well-toned torso under his loose shirt.

"I'm Andrew, by the way," the man said, handing him a drink.

"Nice to meet you," Johnny said, taking a sip of his drink.

Andrew shifted closer to Johnny. "So, how is it so far? Being out?"

" _ Freeing _ ," Johnny answered with a relieved sigh. "It feels like a weight off my shoulders."

Andrew smiled. "Yeah I remember that feeling. Like taking that first breath of air after coming up from a dive."

"You're a diver?" Johnny asked.

"I free dive as a hobby," Andrew said. "You ever dived?"

"Only when I have to for missions," Johnny said. He sent up a small stream of fire from his finger. "I don't really spend a lot of time in the water."

Andrew chuckled. "Should have guessed," he said. "So how many people have made 'flaming' jokes?"

" _ Literally everyone _ ," Johnny groaned. "It's been  _ weeks  _ now, and I  _ still  _ hear it everyday."

Andrew threw back his head and laughed. "Should have figured. It's kind of the obvious joke to make," he said.

"I'm never going to escape," Johnny sighed. He finished his drink and set the empty glass down. "Dance with me?"

"Absolutely," Andrew said, eagerly following along behind Johnny as he moved towards the dance floor.

The music was the same generic club remixes that Johnny heard everywhere, but it didn't matter much to Johnny, it was something he could move to. Andrew's hand landed on his hip as they reached the floor, possessive and warm. The touch sent a thrill up his spine.

It was different, dancing with a man. For one it was more exciting, moving and grinding with someone he was actually attracted to, sending little shocks of pleasure through his body every time they brushed against one another. It was also just  _ different _ , the way Andrew moved was more aggressive than any woman Johnny had ever danced with. It was refreshing not to be expected to take initiative, to let someone else pull him close and wrap their arms around  _ him _ for once.

Andrew wasn't much of a dancer, not having a sense of rhythm at all, but he was athletic and the way he devoured Johnny with his eyes made him shiver. His hands trailed up Johnny's sides, squeezing once before they dropped back to his hips and pulled Johnny back against him. Johnny's backside met his groin, and he could feel his erection through his tight jeans.

"You're so fucking gorgeous," Andrew growled into his ear. "Come home with me."

It was a demand, not a request.

"Yes," Johnny answered, completely out of breath.

Andrew gave a full body shudder and started to drag Johnny away from the dance floor. They cut through the crowd and spilled through the front door onto the street. There was a line of taxis waiting and Andrew flagged one down, hand never leaving Johnny's wrist. They piled into the back of the taxi and sped off once Andrew gave his address. No sooner than they'd started moving, Andrew leaned over and pulled Johnny into a kiss.

The kiss was demanding and a little rough, Andrew pushing Johnny down into the seat. Johnny shivered, feeling tingly all over, heart pounding in his chest. He curled his arms around Andrew's neck, tangling a hand in his brown hair. Andrew growled, the possessive hand reappearing at Johnny's hip, pushing upwards under his shirt. Johnny moaned, embarrassingly loud.

"Hey you two!" the cabby snapped from the front seat. "Behave yourselves or I'll toss you out!"

Andrew broke the kiss, but didn't pull away. "Sorry man, you know how it is when you've got a real hottie in your arms."

The cabbie grumbled. "Yeah yeah, just keep your clothing on. I don't want to have to clean suspicious stains off my upholstery."

"Will do," Andrew promised before ducking back down to recapture Johnny's mouth with his. The cabbie grumbled something about charging double but Johnny was hardly paying attention, far more interested in Andrew's mouth on his.

If dancing with a man had been exciting, making out in the back of a taxi with a man was  _ exhilarating _ . Johnny could have done this for hours, it felt so amazing. Andrew's body was firmer than what he was used to, hard planes of muscle bunching and shifting under skin that was less soft than what Johnny had experienced with women. Andrew was bigger than Johnny, physically stronger too. At one point he grabbed Johnny's wrist and pinned it back against the seat, causing Johnny to gasp.

Andrew raised an eyebrow at Johnny's reaction. Johnny flushed and squirmed, hoping Andrew got the hint. Andrew's eyes went dark and he surged forward, sinking his teeth into Johnny's exposed collar, dragging his tongue across the mark to soothe the sting.

"Fuck, please tell me we're close," Johnny whined, writhing under Andrew's ministrations.

The taxi came to a jarring stop. "Alright, we're here, get out," the cabbie huffed.

Johnny pulled out his wallet and shoved a handful of cash at the cabbie. From the way his eyes lit up, the total was more than enough to cover the inconvenience. Andrew dragged Johnny out of the taxi and into the non-descript apartment building, keeping a hand on him at all times.

"Sorry, it's a walk up," Andrew said, fumbling with his keys. "Sixth floor."

"That's fine," Johnny said.

They got finally got inside and Andrew started pulling him up the stairs. Johnny glanced up and saw it was basically a straight shaft up. "Hold on," he said. He grabbed hold of Andrew's arms and flamed on, flying them up the six floor.

"Shit!" Andrew yelped, flailing slightly in Johnny's grip. Johnny set him down on the brown carpet, unable to hold back a chuckle at Andrew's frazzled expression.

"Sorry, I figured that was easier," Johnny said through his giggles.

"An easier way to give me a  _ heart attack _ ? Sure," Andrew said, putting a hand to his chest.

Johnny grinned, canting a shoulder to give the impression of being coy. "You're saying you'd rather have waited  _ longer  _ to get me into your apartment?"

Andrew's eyes raked over Johnny. He must have been quite a sight, clothing and hair disheveled and lips red and bee-stung from making out in the back seat of the taxi. "No," Andrew growled. "Not at all."

Johnny smiled as Andrew started pulling him along again. The got to his door and Andrew had to fumble around with his keys again. Johnny stood there for a moment, then stepped forward, pressing himself flush against Andrew's back. He pressed a kiss to the back of Andrew's neck, blowing a gentle breath against his hairline.

"Fuck!" Andrew swore, dropping his keys. He swiveled to glare at Johnny. "You're  _ trying  _ to kill me now."

Johnny just giggled, feeling loose and floaty for all that he'd only had one drink. Andrew finally got his apartment open and yanked Johnny inside, kicking the door closed behind them.

Andrew was immediately all over Johnny again, kissing him fiercely with tongue and teeth. Johnny moaned into it, letting Andrew press him back against the wall. Andrew ground their pelvises together, growling into the kiss, teeth grazing Johnny's lip. Johnny gasped and clung to Andrew, dragging his nails across his shoulders, hips jerking into the delicious friction. Andrew bent to kiss along his jaw, sucking a mark into his sensitive jugular.

"Andrew," Johnny moaned, head thudding back against the wall. " _ Please _ ."

Andrew shuddered against him. "Bedroom," he hissed through clenched teeth.

That sounded like the best idea in the world to Johnny. He let Andrew drag him along to the bedroom, shedding clothing as they went. Johnny sighed when Andrew wrapped him in his arms, skin against skin. They tumbled onto the bed, laughing as they hit the pillows.

“So,” Andrew growled throatily as he kissed his way across Johnny’s chest. “You wanna top or you want me to top?”

“You can top,” Johnny hummed. “I’ve never actually done this with a man before, it’ll be exciting.”

Andrew stopped in his tracks and sat up. “You’ve never done this before?” he asked, frowning. “Are you sure you want to do this? You don't want to, I don’t know, save it for someone special?”

Johnny had considered doing that, keeping his second ‘first time’ for someone special. Considering his actual first time with a woman had turned out to be less than great in the end, Johnny didn't really feel like bothering with all that nonsense. Virginity was a social construct anyway.

“I think I’ve waited long enough, don't you?” Johnny said, sliding his hands up Andrew’s arms, which were pleasantly coiled with muscle.

Andrew stared down at him for a moment. “Yeah I guess,” he said, though he still seemed hesitant. “You uh, know how it works?”

“I’ve been fucked in the ass before thanks,” Johnny said, rolling his eyes. “Pegging  _ is _ a thing straight people do.”

“Right,” Andrew said, relaxing a bit. He leaned back down and kissed Johnny again, tongue sliding across his lips.

Johnny moaned and kissed back, winding his arms around Andrew’s shoulder, one hand ending up tangled in his dark hair. Andrew moved to kiss and suck at his neck, hands trailing down to fiddle with his belt. Johnny helpfully lifted his hips so Andrew could slide his jeans and underwear off.

For a moment, Andrew just stared down at him. “Fuck you're gorgeous,” he growled. He bent to start kissing and biting across his collar and chest. “I wanna lick you all over.”

“Weird,” Johnny said, the word stuttering slightly as Andrew bit down on his nipple. He reached down and squeezed Andrew’s ass through his pants. “Come on, you too.”

Andrew grumbled and sat up, quickly shucking his jeans. He was toned and muscular, with obvious tan lines across the tops of his thighs and under his hips. His cock had a nice curve to it, and Johnny couldn't wait to do all kinds of things with it. He grinned as Andrew laid back down on top of him, revelling in the feeling of his heated skin flush against his own.

For a minute they just made out, tongues sliding against one another, hands roaming over each other’s bodies. Johnny squeezed Andrews firm ass, making him growl into his mouth and grind his hips down. Johnny gasped at the friction, wrapping his legs around Andrew’s hips, squeezing him closer.

“Andrew,” Johnny panted. “Fuck,  _ Andrew _ .”

“God you're so fucking hot,” Andrew groaned, thrusting his hips against Johnny’s. He swore and pulled away. “Okay, I need to get this rolling before I come just from dry humping you.”

Johnny snorted but waited patiently as Andrew fished around in his bedside drawer for lube and a condom. He set the condom on the pillow next to Johnny’s head and uncapped the lube. Johnny helpfully spread his legs while Andrew slicked his fingers.

“Wow,” Andrew breathed, leaning over Johnny. “I’d heard rumors y’know, about you waxing  _ everywhere _ . Never thought I’d get to see that confirmed first hand.”

“I like the way it feels,” Johnny said. He moaned when Andrew’s slicked up fingers slid across his prenerium.

Andrew circled his fingers around Johnny’s hole, making him shiver. Johnny had done this to himself a few times, fingered himself open and then fucked himself with a dildo. He’d also had a few female partners before who’d been into pegging, which had been very fun. This—Johnny thought as Andrew pushed his fingers, first one and then a second, into his ass—was  _ so _ much better.

“ _ Oh _ ,” Johnny moaned, a shudder running through his body at the pleasure. “That’s good. Fuck, please.”

“You’re fucking gorgeous,” Andrew groaned, thrusting his fingers into Johnny, stretching him out. “Fuck  _ look _ at you. I can’t believe you're real.”

He curled his fingers, brushing against Johnny’s prostate. Johnny cried out, cock twitching and leaking precum onto his belly. “Andrew,” he gasped. “Please,  _ more _ , I want it.”

Andrew growled and shoved another finger into Johnny, trying to stretch him out faster. Johnny moaned and writhed on the bed, canting his hips up into Andrew’s fingers. Andrew’s other hand trailed up Johnny’s stomach, across his chest, then back down towards Johnny’s cock, though he didn't touch it.

Johnny cursed when Andrew pinched his nipple. “Okay, I’m ready.”

“You sure?” Andrew asked, breathless and staring reverently down at Johnny.

“God fucking—if you make me wait any longer, I’ll set this bed on fire,” Johnny hissed, grinding down onto Andrew’s fingers. He bit his lip and looked up at him through his eyelashes. “Please Andrew, I need it.”

Andrew’s eyes darkened and he nearly fell off the bed scrambling to get the condom. He hastily put it on and poured more lube over his cock. Johnny spread his legs and sighed as Andrew settled between them. The blunt head of his cock pressed against Johnny’s hole and he shivered in anticipation.

Johnny wrapped his legs around Andrew’s hips and reached up to squeeze his biceps. Andrew gave him a toothy grin and slowly pushed his hips forward. Johnny cried out at the initial breech, drawing it out into a moan as Andrew bottomed out.

“Oh  _ fuck _ ,” Andrew gasped. “You’re so  _ tight _ .”

Johnny dug his nails into Andrew’s arms, pressing his heel to the small of his back to try and get  _ more _ . “Andrew,” he moaned. “ _ Fuck me _ .”

Eager to oblige, Andrew moved, fucking into Johnny with rhythmic thrusts. Johnny cried out, arching his back and jerking his hips up to meet Andrew’s thrusts. A droplet of sweat fell from Andrew’s forehead onto Johnny’s chest.

Johnny felt like he was melting, every nerve ending on fire with pleasure. Whatever he had imagined being with a man would be like, it  _ paled _ in comparison to the real thing. Being with a woman, it had  _ felt _ nice, he’d enjoyed it, but this was an entire different  _ planet _ of sensations, sending him into heights of pleasure he hadn’t known existed.

Was this what it was  _ supposed _ to be like? Was this what people had been talking about when they talked about sex? Was this what Johnny had been missing out on all this time?

“You’re so fucking  _ warm _ inside,” Andrew gasped, picking up the pace of his thrusts. “Fuck you're so gorgeous.  _ Fuck _ !”

“Come on, fuck me,” Johnny whined. “Harder, please,  _ more _ .”

Andrew growled and paused to hook Johnny’s knees over his elbows, bending Johnny in half and ramming into him. Johnny wailed, tossing his head back against the pillows, hand scrambling in the sheets for something to grab onto. Andrew bent down to mouth at his neck, the slight change in angle making Andrew ram into his prostate with each thrust.

“Oh!” Johnny cried. “Right there! Fuck, right there! Please, Andrew!”

“Yeah, c’mon baby, fucking come for me,” Andrew growled.

Johnny felt like he was going to lose his mind. He reached down to clumsily wrap his hand around his neglected cock. He’d barely made it through one stroke before he came over his own belly, mouth opening in a silent scream. The world whited out for a moment, and went Johnny came back to himself Andrew was cursing and snapping his hips into his ass, spilling into the condom.

After what felt like an eternity, Andrew collapsed against him, chest heaving like he’d run a marathon. His softening cock slid out of Johnny’s ass, making him shiver, shocks of pleasure still jolting through his body. He took deep breaths, trying to find what was left of his brain and reassemble it into something resembling coherency.

“Wow,” he managed.

Andrew groaned. “That was fucking  _ amazing _ , holy shit,” he said, rolling off of Johnny so he wasn't crushing him.

Johnny stared up at the ceiling hazily, unable to keep from trembling. He felt incredible, completely overwhelmed by new sensations. “Is that what it’s like all the time?” he asked aloud, more to himself than anyone else.

Andrew cracked an eye open and stared at Johnny for a moment. He finally caught his breath and sat up slightly. “It’s pretty overwhelming, isn’t it? How different it is?”

Johnny moaned and writhed on the sheets, feeling each pleasant little ache. “I feel  _ incredible _ .”

Andrew chuckled. “Those first few times are really something else,” he said. “Everything’s all new and exciting.”

Johnny looked up at Andrew, who was smiling down at him. He reached up and pulled him down for a kiss, slow and sweet. Andrew hummed into it, one hand reaching over Johnny to slide up his ribs.

They kissed for a few minutes, but Johnny could feel the heaviness in his limbs start to settle in. Andrew apparently could feel it as well and reached down to drag the bedspread over them. He settled down next to Johnny, moist breath fanning over his neck as he started to drift off. Johnny closed his eyes and revelled in all of the amazing new sensations in his body, wishing he could live in that moment forever as he fell into slumber.

* * *

Johnny woke a few hours later, tangled up in the dirty sheets. The world outside the window was still dark, probably a few hours from morning. With a sigh, Johnny stretched, feeling the pleasant aches all over his body.

A snore from next to him let Johnny know that Andrew was still dead asleep. Johnny turned to look at him, tracing the contrast of shadows across his face. He was completely relaxed in sleep, the drool on his pillow suggesting he was maybe too relaxed. There was a long scratch on his shoulder where Johnny had dug his nails is earlier. Johnny smiled faintly and sat up, looking around the room.

It was fairly cluttered, he noted, with hardly any floor space available. What little existed was covered in clothing and other detritus, so almost nothing of the actual floor was visible. There was a stack of dirty plates on the bedside table, and the trash bin he could see was overflowing.

Johnny looked back down at Andrew, who was still sleeping soundly. It probably hadn't been wise, to go home with the first handsome stranger who'd bought him a drink, but Johnny couldn't really bring himself to care much. People had been calling him out for being fast and loose with women for years now, despite very rarely ever going home with anyone—all part of that carefully crafted image he presented to the world. After all that time pretending, he probably deserved to _actually_ sleep around.

Andrew snorted in his sleep and pressed his face further into the pillow, smearing drool across his face. Johnny chuckled and slipped out of bed, gathering up his scattered clothes and heading for the bathroom.

One quick shower later, Johnny heated himself dry and took a moment to look at himself in the mirror. There were marks dotting his neck and chest, little bites and suck-marks scattered across his skin. His face, neck, and chest were still flushed pink (which couldn't have been from the shower, as he'd actually left the water quite cool). Johnny didn't really look much different, but he could certainly  _ feel  _ the difference.

"So this is what it's like," Johnny mused aloud.

Dressing quickly, Johnny slipped from the bathroom and back into the bedroom, looking on the ground for his phone and wallet which had fallen out of his pants at some point. He tried to keep quiet, but there was so much stuff on the floor it was hard not to make noise. By the time he'd located his phone and wallet, Andrew was sitting up, bleary and confused.

"Johnny?" he slurred, sitting up and wiping his mouth.

"Hey, sorry to wake you," Johnny said, smiling through the dark. "I hope it's okay, but I borrowed your shower."

Andrew scrubbed his eyes, starting to wake up a little more. "Yeah, that's cool," he said. He blinked at Johnny a few times. With his hair sticking up all over the place, he was kind of cute. "You're leaving?"

Johnny bit his lip. Had he misread something? "Um yeah, unless you wanted me to stay?"

"Uh, no it's fine," Andrew said. "If you've got somewhere to be, that's cool."

"Right," Johnny said, stowing his wallet and phone. "Well, I should go in that case."

"Wait," Andrew called, tossing off the sheets and leaping out of bed in all his nude glory. "Look, I'm not really looking for anything serious right now, but uh, could I get your number?"

Johnny raised an eyebrow. "Really?" he asked. He didn't really do one night stands often, but in his experience they usually ended with the guest slipping away as quietly as possible.

Andrew gave him an eager smile. "Yeah I mean, I don't really do the whole  _ dating  _ thing, but you're super fucking hot. Last night was  _ amazing _ . I'd really like a repeat sometime."

Johnny considered it. "Sure," he said. What did he have to lose, really?

Andrew lit up. "Awesome, great, yeah, let me find my phone," he said, jumping around to search for his pants, still complete naked. He found his pants and dug out his phone, unlocked it, and handed it off to Johnny.

Johnny programmed his number into Andrew's phone and handed it back. "I should actually be getting back soon," he said. "I think it's my turn to make breakfast for the kids."

"Ugh," Andrew said. "Sounds like a nightmare."

"What, breakfast?" Johnny chuckled.

" _ Kids _ ," Andrew said with a roll of his eyes. "Anyway, you want my number?"

"Text it to me and I'll save it," Johnny said. He leaned over and kissed Andrew's cheek. It was slimy from the drool. "Gotta go."

"Okay," Andrew said. "Bye."

Johnny smiled and left Andrew standing in his bedroom, still completely naked.

The sky was just starting to lighten as Johnny stepped out onto the street. Down the street a car alarm was blaring, and something alive was shuffling around in a pile of garbage in the alley next to the building. Johnny took a deep breath and let it out with a satisfied sigh. He flamed on and flew home.

* * *

Peter was in the middle of his morning coffee when he saw it. He didn't follow gossip columns, but he did have notifications set up for certain things in the news for the Avengers, the X-Men, and of course the Fantastic Four. Of course, that led to gossipy sensationalism crossing into his timeline whenever there was some sort of personal scandal or outrageous gossip.

All that being said, his timeline as of late had been filled with article after article about Johnny, newly out and living it up telling the whole world his story. Peter had watched most of the interviews, smiling each time Johnny told and retold his experience of being closeted for so long. It made him happy to see one of his oldest friends start living his life as he was always meant to.

Over the course of the weeks, Peter had noted a change in Johnny's demeanor. The first few interviews after coming out, Johnny had seemed somewhat tense, ready to defend himself if it came to that. After a few weeks, he had become relaxed, more so than Peter had ever seen him. Looking back at older interviews, Peter really did get the impression of a man desperately trying to hide in plain sight. Now that Johnny was out and no longer hiding, he seemed  _ freer _ , more at home in his own skin. He looked  _ happy _ , and it warmed Peter's heart.

All this to say, Peter didn't really think much of it when the article crossed his timeline. He wouldn't have noticed it at all if it hadn't been for the photo, a grainy travesty with the worst composition Peter had seen in a while, which was typical of tabloid fare. Intrigued, Peter tapped the article, taking a sip of his coffee and wondering what sort of wild accusations were going to be heaped onto Johnny's head.

SPARKS FLY FOR FLAMING FANTASTIC? HUMAN TORCH SPOTTED WITH MYSTERY MAN, the headline read, and under it the full picture loaded. Despite the abysmal quality of the photo, it clearly showed Johnny in the backseat of a taxi, locked in a passionate kiss with a handsome man, the man's hand travelling up into Johnny's shirt.

Peter choked on his coffee, spewing it all over his phone in a coughing fit. He read the article through watery eyes, stomach sinking with each word. The story itself wasn't anything special, just some generic gossip about Johnny being seen leaving a gay club with a handsome stranger and a bunch of speculation about who said stranger was. It was nothing Peter hadn't read before a million other times, the only difference being that they were all about whichever woman Johnny was spotted with.

Realistically, there was no reason that Peter's stomach should be twisting in his gut as he reread the article again. He  _ knew  _ Johnny was gay, the whole  _ world  _ knew it. This shouldn't be a surprise in the slightest.

So why did Peter's heart feel like it was in a vice?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At first I was going to give Andrew a different name, but then I decided that Andrew was perfect. Three guesses why lmao.
> 
> I only follow one beauty YouTuber and whoever guesses right can have a hot dog and a cameo in a chapter idk I'm sleep deprived.


	4. Part I.iv: Continuum

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's probably a crap ton of mistakes in this one but fuck it, it should have been published days ago anyway. Hope y'all enjoy!
> 
> Trigger warning for mentions historically accurate homophobia, modern day homophobia, the f-slur, and a sex scene.

After Andrew was Kyle, a banker and part time model. He had a nice apartment in Hell's Kitchen and two cats who woke them up at five in the morning for breakfast. Like Andrew, Kyle wasn't looking for anything serious, but he did make Johnny coffee in the morning and, also like Andrew, asked for Johnny's number for a repeat of the night before. Johnny actually met up with him again, but aside from having fun in the bedroom, Johnny found he wasn't that interested.

Following Kyle was Gilles, a tourist from Montreal with an adorable accent and a cheap hotel room. After thoroughly destroying the bed sheets and breaking a lamp, Johnny and Gilles parted ways in the morning with a kiss and a quickie in the shower.

Eric, Steven, Mark, Julian, Cody, Leo, Tyrell, Patrick, Marshall, Johnny's contact list started to fill up with men he met in the clubs around the city, so much so that he was starting to lose track of who was who. Sometimes he went on actual dates—Terrence was sweet and liked to talk, and Paul was devastatingly handsome and liked to impress—but it never lasted for more than a week at best.

Despite the fact that Johnny had never really been very interested in casual sex that much, he found it was an entirely different story when he was with men. It was as though he'd been sitting at the wrong table at a buffet, forcing himself to eat food he didn't like out of politeness, sticking to one or two dishes that he could stand better. Now he was at the right table, and he wanted to have a taste of  _ everything _ . He felt like a teenager again, wild and without inhibitions, testing his boundaries to see what he liked.

Johnny was bent over on the bed, propped up on his elbows and knees. Strong hands gripped his ass, spreading his cheeks while a wicked tongue pressed into his hole. “Mm that feels so good,” he hummed.

The tongue paused for a moment. “You like that baby?” Darren asked, grinning with shiny lips.

“Fuck yeah,” Johnny purred, pressing his hips back a little. “Come on, don’t stop.”

Darren grinned wider and ducked back down to run his tongue along Johnny’s perineum before pushing into his hole again. Johnny moaned and spread his legs wider, biting his lip when he heard the ‘pop’ of the cap on the lube. Darren bent lower to lick and suck at Johnny’s balls and immediately plunged two fingers into his hole.

Johnny gasped when Darren pressed against his prostate. “Oh! Right there! Fuck that’s so good!”

Darren growled and pushed his fingers in deeper, massaging Johnny’s prostate. Johnny whined and panted, jolting at each shock of pleasure spiking up his spine. His cock leaked onto the bedsheets, twitching with each press of Darren’s fingers.

“Fuck, okay I’m ready,” Johnny gasped. “Come on, fuck me.”

Darren shivered and moved across the bed to grab the condom he’d left on the nightstand.

The prep had been hasty, Johnny bit his lip at the burn as Darren pressed inside. It felt amazing though, Johnny didn't think he’d ever get enough of this, the stretch of being filled. He moaned as Darren bottomed out, hips pressing against Johnny’s ass.

“You’re so  _ hot _ inside,” Darren groaned, grabbing tightly to Johnny’s hips, starting to rock into him.

Johnny groaned at the movement. “Gimme a sec,” he whined.

Darren made a pitchy noise but stilled his hips. “C’mon baby, you feel so good, don't torture me.”

“ _ Wait _ ,” Johnny commanded, trying to adjust to the intrusion. He took a few steadying breaths and finally relaxed. “Okay, I’m ready. Give it to me.”

Darren groaned and did just that, fucking into Johnny with quick, forceful thrusts. He gripped Johnny’s hips tightly, hard enough to bruise, practically dragging Johnny back onto his cock with each thrust. Johnny moaned loudly, dropping his head forward and gripping the sheets tightly. He babled wordless praise, encouraging Darren to move faster,  _ deeper _ , hard enough to make the bed slam into the wall.

“So good, holy  _ fuck _ ,” Darren groaned, thrusts starting to lose their rhythm. He cursed again, reaching out to grab Johnny’s hair, shoving him face first into the bed. He plastered himself against Johnny’s back and settled his hand back at Johnny’s hip. “Fuck baby, you’re so amazing.”

Johnny’s cry was muffled, but he could hardly get anything out with the way Darren was crushing him to the bed and punching the breath out him with with each thrust. His head swam and he felt like he was melting. Johnny was completely pinned under Darren’s weight, unable to move or do anything but  _ take _ it.

Johnny came so hard he nearly blacked out for a moment.

Darren squeezing Johnny’s hips painfully tight brought him back into himself. Darren cursed in his ear, gasping as his hips jerked irregularly. After a moment he collapsed against Johnny, crushing him to the bed. Johnny let out a squeak as the air was pushed from his lungs, but Darren quickly sat up, cock sliding out of his thoroughly abused hole. Darren quickly removed the condom and tossed it towards the bin before flopping back down on the bed next to Johnny.

"Fuck," Darren breathed, tossing an arm over his eyes. "That was  _ incredible _ ."

"Hm," Johnny hummed, stretching like a satisfied cat. "It  _ was  _ pretty good."

Johnny laid there for a while, basking in the afterglow. He was just starting to consider going to sleep when Darren rolled over and started trailing a hand up Johnny's spine. "Hey so," he said, sounding a little nervous. "Wanna go again?"

Johnny turned over and smiled up at him. Before he could answer, his phone started blaring at him from wherever he'd left his pants. He immediately rolled out of bed and checked it, cursing when he saw the screen.

"I need to go," he said, shimmying into his pants. Skintight jeans were great for the club, not so much for having to get dressed quickly.

"Really?" Darren asked, sitting up on the bed. "You can't even stay just to like, cuddle?"

"Some kind of portal opened up over Queens," Johnny said, finally getting his pants back on. He searched around for his shirt, cursing when he couldn't find it. "I've got work to do."

"Oh, right," Darren said. "Well, can I call you? I mean, I'm not really looking for anything serious, but like, we can get lunch sometime if you want."

"Sure, right," Johnny said distractedly. He dug his shirt out from under the bed just as his phone beeped again. "Dammit, I need to go." He quickly jammed his feet into his shoes and went to the window.

"Wait, I didn't get your number!" Darren called after him as Johnny flew out the window, shirt still in his hand.

Johnny arrived to the scene to find the rest of the Four already there, trying to corral what looked like a pack of dinosaurs. A flash of red and blue told him that Spider-Man was also on the scene.

"Alright, what have we got?" Johnny asked, swooping by the Fantasticar where Reed was tapping away at a complicated looking machine. "Time travel? Dimensional portal? Very well-made robots?"

"Looks like a rudimentary time travel portal," Reed said. "It's completely unstable and about to collapse, but we can't let it go until all of the animals that came through are back where they came from."

"Alright then, standard procedure?" Johnny asked, tossing his shirt into the backseat of the car.

"Don't hurt the animals if you can help it," Reed said, more focused on his machine.

Johnny nodded and swooped down to help the other three herd the confused and probably frightened therapods back towards the portal.

"What took you so damn long?" Ben huffed. He was flailing around, giant arms flapping and trying to intimidate the dinosaurs away from the populated areas. Considering the fact that the dinosaurs were barely larger than turkeys, it was fairly effective.

"I was out," Johnny said, starting to cut off streets with walls of fire. The little dinosaurs squawked in panic and started running away, back towards the portal.

"See if you can gather them all together, I'll put up a force field pen around them," Sue said, zipping past on an invisible disk of force field.

"Hey, I think these are velociraptors, "Spider-Man said as he swung by. "Like  _ actual _ ones."

"I thought velociraptors were way bigger than this?" Johnny said, darting around to spook the stragglers back towards the rest of the group.

" _ Movie  _ velociraptors maybe," Spider-Man said. " _ Actual  _ velociraptors were way smaller and covered in feathers. They were basically large turkeys with teeth."

"These things certainly got the  _ brains  _ of turkeys," Ben grumbled, bending down to scoop up one of the smaller dinosaurs that was trying to dart between his legs and escape. "Not that way you stupid little chicken."

The velociraptor screeched and did it's best to scratch the hell out of Ben's hand, barely getting a few scuff marks for it's effort. Ben sighed and tucked the wriggling creature under his arm as he shooed the rest of them back to where Sue was waiting with a large dome, several dinosaurs already inside. They managed to get the rest of them secure, Spider-Man fetching the last of the stragglers.

"They're kind of cute actually," Sue said, watching Spider-Man wrestle with a particularly chubby one, trying to get it into the dome with the rest. "The little babies are so fluffy."

"It's actually quite fascinating," Reed said, stretching down to get a closer look. "It's a shame they have to go back so fast. I would love to study them some more, but they have to get back to their time as fast as possible."

"Before they hurt someone?" Spider-Man asked, barely dodging a snap of teeth around his finger as he finally got the chubby one into the dome.

"Before they get sick from the unfamiliar pathogens in our environment and die," Reed explained.

"That would be terrible," Sue cooed, bending down to admire one dinosaur that was puffing up and trying to intimidate her. "Poor little cuties."

"Sue, the portal is about to collapse," Reed said. "The cuties need to go home now."

Five minutes later, the dinosaurs were back on the other side of the portal just in time for it to collapse. The person responsible for the portal was a college kid trying out a new device. Considering that no one got hurt and the whole incident seemed to be an accident, Reed gave the kid a stern talking-to and recommended a few labs where they could tinker with such things without putting lives at risk.

"Well that went smoothly, all things considered," Johnny said. He turned to Spider-Man. "Why are you here by the way? This doesn't seem like a big enough event for a team up."

"My aunt lives three blocks away," Peter explained. "I was on my way to dinner. Which I'm now late for, by the way."

"You didn't  _ have  _ to stop and help," Johnny huffed, flaming off. "Honestly, you create your own problems."

Peter didn't answer, having gone completely still. He stared at Johnny, the intensity of his gaze making Johnny want to squirm. "What?" he asked. "Something on my face?"

"You've got…" Peter made a weird gesture towards Johnny's chest, "marks."

Suddenly Johnny remembered that he hadn't put his shirt back on. He looked down at his chest and took note of the array of various hickies, bite marks, and the occasional bruise. At his hips were two very obvious handprint shaped red marks from where Darren had gripped him tightly. He flushed and crossed his arms over his chest, covering a conspicuous ring of teeth indentations around his nipple.

"Whoops," he chuckled, giving a sheepish grin. "Guess I should put my shirt on."

Peter grumbled something Johnny didn't catch. "If you don't mind. You look like you were  _ attacked _ ," he said. He tilted his head and reached out to rub something off Johnny's cheek. "What's—? Are you wearing  _ makeup _ ?"

Johnny smacked Peter's hand away. "It's just a bit of contour," he said. He'd been starting to wear more makeup when he went out, though it was fairly light. Johnny bit his lip, feeling a spike of self consciousness run through him. "What, does it look bad?"

Peter went quiet again, still staring at him. "No, it doesn't look bad," he said. "It looks…  _ fine _ ."

"Fine," Johnny repeated. "Well, I've actually been thinking of getting a little more daring with my clothes and makeup. What do you think?"

Peter snorted. "Buddy you once wore a jean vest with your initials bedazzled on it. I think you can't get much more daring than that."

"It was  _ sequins _ , not bedazzling," Johnny huffed.

"What's the difference?" Peter huffed. "Can you put your shirt on please?"

Johnny rolled his eyes and started walking over to the Fantasticar to fish his shirt out from the backseat. "Prude," he said. "And the  _ difference  _ is that sequins are little reflective disks. Bedazzling are usually little rhinestones or plastic gems."

"Oh,  _ my apologies _ ," Peter said, sarcasm dripping from every word.

"For someone who makes such a stink about having to sew his costume back up every time it gets wrecked, you don't really know much about fashion," Johnny scoffed, pulling his shirt on. Not that it covered much anyway, as its V neck dived quite low.

"Seeing as I've never had any sparkly crap on my costume, I don't really see the relevance of learning the difference between the different kinds of sparkly crap you can put on clothes," Peter huffed.

"If you bothered to learn  _ anything _ , you might actually get a damn sewing machine," Johnny grumbled. "Instead of sewing the whole thing by hand like a  _ lunatic _ ."

"I don't even know how to use a sewing machine," Peter huffed. Johnny noticed his head tilt down for a fraction of a second. "Did you want a sweater or something?"

Johnny raised an eyebrow. "Did you hit your  _ head _ or something?"

Peter grumbled something unkind. Johnny rolled his eyes and decided to ignore Peter until whatever bug crawled up his ass took a hike. He walked back over to where Reed and the others were talking to the college kid.

After a few minutes, Reed sent the college kid back home where his parents were waiting to lay into him as well. Sue spoke to the police that had arrived on site and it looked as though things would get wrapped up before the news crews could even arrive.

"Geez, if I had known it was going to be this easy, I wouldn't have bothered," Johnny huffed. "You guys could have handled this blindfolded."

"We have to treat everything with the same amount of seriousness Johnny," Sue said. "We never know what might happen."

"Even Mole Man?" Johnny asked, raising an eyebrow.

Sue made a face. "Yes, even Mole Man," she said, though she didn't sound happy about it. "Where  _ were  _ you, by the way? We almost had everything finished by the time you showed up."

Johnny shrugged a shoulder. "I was out," he said.

Spider-Man landed on the Fantasticar, sticking to it sideways in a crouch. "Yeah yeah, we all saw the rainbow, we know you're  _ out _ , but where  _ were  _ you young man?" He pressed the back of his hand to his forehead dramatically. "You're worrying us sick with all your comings and going all hours of the night. You're breaking your mama's heart!"

Johnny rolled his eyes. "I was  _ out _ , what else do you want me to say?" he said. "You want me to give you a play-by-play of how I was getting my ass eaten?"

Sue made a pinched face like she'd eaten a lemon and Spider-Man let out a noise like a strangled goose and fell off the side of the Fantasticar, landing in a heap. "No thank you Johnny, it's fine," Sue said after composing herself.

Johnny snorted and booted Peter in the side where he was laying. "Maybe that'll teach you to mind your damn business."

Peter sprung up like he'd been zapped in the ass by Electro. He stared at Johnny for a second with those big, blank eyes of his mask. Johnny prided himself on being pretty good at reading Peter's expression through the mask, but at that moment he didn't have a clue what was going on in his webbed head. The moment passed and Spider-Man shot out a webline, muttering something about being late for dinner.

"Our regards to your aunt!" Sue called after him. Peter didn't even turn to wave.

"Well that was abrupt," Johnny said. "Wonder what his problem was."

Sue looked him over for a moment. Johnny shifted uncomfortably under her gaze, knowing what he must look like. He wasn't ashamed of what he was doing, not anymore, but she was still his older sister and he did have a sense of decency sometimes.

"He's probably just running late," Sue said before walking off to help with the last of the clean up. Johnny stared after her, wondering why it felt like she was keeping a secret.

* * *

Whatever Peter's problem was, it was getting worse.

After that first article came out, Peter had chalked his reaction up to being blindsided with the actual reality of Johnny being gay. Sure, Johnny had  _ said _ he was gay, told the whole world and then some, but actually  _ seeing _ Johnny in the arms of another man was completely new. Peter hadn't expected it, and hence his weird visceral reaction. Eventually he'd get used to seeing Johnny with men instead of women and he'd stop getting that weird feeling in his chest.

The weeks went by, and Johnny was seen with no shortage of men, but Peter still felt like he wanted to crawl out of his skin each time he saw some stranger wrapped around Johnny like a slimy octopus. Each time Peter stumbled onto yet another tabloid spread about Johnny being caught going home with yet another man, he got the overwhelming urge to punch something. Lately he found himself staying out later and later, swinging through the city searching for something to work out the unnamable emotions roiling in his stomach.

Maybe it was the fact that Johnny seemed to have a different guy on his arm every time Peter turned around? Despite the rumors that circled Johnny like vultures, he very rarely had 'casual' relationships with women. He'd made up crazy stories about women he 'dated', but for the most part he actually did  _ date  _ them. Now Johnny seemed to have a date once in a blue moon, but as many casual 'encounters' as there were stars in the sky. It was a jarring turnaround, and perhaps the reason behind Peter's feelings.

Peter glared down at the newspaper on the coffee table. The front page was yet another sensationalist article about Johnny's new 'habits', probably rife with speculation and thinly veiled homophobia. Peter didn't bother reading it, but the photo on the front drew his eye. Johnny was stepping out of yet another gay club, one hand on the chest of a tall man. The man, dark haired and hungry eyed, had an arm wrapped possessively around Johnny, his hand—thought out of view—obviously on Johnny's ass.

Something ugly like an oil slick made its home in Peter's stomach.

"Peter?  _ Peter _ ?" Aunt May called, startling Peter out of his head.

"What?" Peter blurted out. He remembered where he was—at dinner at his aunt's house, dinner being over and the two of them—JJ Senior having gone out to spend time with JJ Junior—having moved into the parlor for tea and a chat. "Oh, sorry Aunt May."

Aunt May tutted at him. "Goodness boy, wherever did you go just now?" she asked. "You looked like you were on another  _ planet  _ you were so far away."

"Sorry," Peter apologized again. "I was just thinking about… a friend," he said.

Aunt May raised a white eyebrow and glanced down at the newspaper Peter had been glaring two holes in. She set down the tray of tea she was carrying and picked up the newspaper, setting it aside.

"It was quite sudden, wasn't it?" she said, pouring out the tea. "Him coming out like that."

Peter thought about that night at the usual place. "Yeah, I was pretty shocked. I never even guessed."

Aunt May hummed and handed him his cup of tea. "Careful dear, it's hot. I suppose it was, though I had a suspicious feeling," she said, finally settling down on the sofa next to him.

"You did?" Peter asked. He took a sip of tea despite his spider-sense warning him and winced at the scalding temperature.

"I  _ said  _ it was hot Peter, goodness," Aunt May huffed. "And yes, I thought he might be inclined a certain way."

"Inclined a certain way," Peter repeated, blowing on his tea. "What made you think that?"

Aunt May raised her eyebrow at him. "You remember you brought him to my wedding?"

"I remember," Peter said. "He spent the whole night flirting with Carlie Cooper."

"Yes, and making moon eyes at you whenever your back was turned," Aunt May hummed. "I've been around a while, I know what it looks like when a man desperately wants something he can't have."

Peter felt his face heat. "Oh," he said.

Aunt May gave him an assessing look. "You don't sound very surprised," she observed.

Peter took another sip of his tea, stalling for something to tell her. "Well, we've been friends for a while," he said, "and when he came out he told me first, before he made his big announcement." He shrugged a shoulder casually. "He may have mentioned having a crush on me."

"Oh I see," Aunt May said, "and how badly did you break that poor boy's heart?"

"Aunt Maaaay," Peter groaned, flopping his head against the back of the sofa. "I let him down as easily as I  _ could _ . And he was fine! No broken heart or anything!"

Aunt May chuckled. "Well, I can't say he doesn't have good taste in men," she said, reaching over to pinch his cheek like he was twelve. She glanced back down to where she's stashed the newspaper. "I take it from your expression you've been having a hard time with this?"

Peter blew out a long sigh. "That's the thing, I  _ haven't  _ been having a hard time. He's my friend, of  _ course  _ I accept him for who he is, no matter what gender he prefers to be with. He told me he was in love with me and I joked around with him about it. I'm totally fine with him being gay," he explained. The ugly feeling in his gut slithered around like an eel. "Or I  _ thought  _ I was. I don't know what's wrong with me."

Aunt May hummed and sipped her tea, waiting for him to gather up his thoughts. Peter thought back to earlier, when he'd seen Johnny shirtless. His chest and back had been  _ littered  _ with marks, bites and scratches and even  _ bruises  _ in some places. It had twisted Peter's gut, to see Johnny like that, like he'd been roughed up or hurt. In his head he knew it was probably all consensual, but that didn't make it easy to look at.

"I don't think I like the guys he's hanging around," Peter said finally, glaring at the ceiling. "They don't seem like they're good for him."

That felt like the right answer. These men Johnny was going home with, none of them seemed to be the type to want a long lasting relationship. Peter  _ knew  _ Johnny, knew that under all the bluster and bragging he was a romantic, that he wanted love and commitment. The guys Johnny was hanging around didn't seem like commitment material; they were way too rough with him. Didn't they realize that Johnny bruised easy?

"Ah, I see," Aunt May said sagely. "You're worried about your friend."

Peter sighed. "He's a big boy, he can take care of himself," he said. "I just… I  _ know  _ him, he gets his heart broken easily."

Aunt May hummed and took a sip of her tea. "You know, when I was young, I had a lot of friends. Many of them were  _ inclined _ . Of course, no one ever  _ said  _ anything, there was none of this 'coming out' business that they do today. It was a different time you see." She stirred her tea for a moment, the spoon clinking against the delicate china. "It was always such a secret. Secret words, secret hand gestures, secret meeting places, so many  _ secrets _ . It was a necessity, you understand. I even stepped out with a few of them, to keep the police off their scent."

Peter raised an eyebrow. "Really? I never heard about that."

"I wasn't born a little old lady Peter, I had my own wild youth," Aunt May said with a sly smile. "In any case, these friends of mine, they had to keep most of their lives a secret. From their families, their friends, everyone they met, because if they didn't the police would arrest them for indecency." She let out a long sigh. "I lost quite a few friends that way."

Peter said nothing and took a sip of his tea. He hated to see his Aunt so sad, especially over something he couldn't control. If Spider-Man had been around back then he might have been to do something, but barring going back in time, there was nothing he could do.

Aunt May stared down into her tea, the weight of her melancholy memories falling across her shoulders like a blanket. "I always felt so terrible for them, having to keep such a huge part of themselves locked up so tight. I can't even  _ imagine  _ what it must have felt like, not even allowed to love someone in public. I saw it weigh on them so heavily."

Peter glanced away, thinking of all the times he'd snuck out the bedroom window of this very house, the secrets the walls could tell. Suddenly he empathized deeply with Johnny, having to keep such a difficult secret to keep himself and the people he loved safe. Some days it felt as though he had a stone around his neck, strangling him and dragging him down. Yet he kept his mouth shut, knowing the kind of hell he'd rain down on the people he loved if he told them.

A heavy weight indeed.

Aunt May reached out and placed her weathered hand on his arm. "All this to say Peter, I think you should go easy on your friend," she said. "He's just come out,  _ just  _ started living freely. After a lifetime of keeping it all a secret, he can finally be himself. Wouldn't  _ you  _ go a little wild?"

Peter felt the corner of his mouth quirk up in a smile. "I don't know about that. I'm not really the wild type."

Aunt May huffed a laughed and patted his arm. "Well, I'm sure you can try to understand what he might be going through. If you're worried about his safety, you should talk to him, but I'm certain this will run its course eventually. Just let him have his fun."

Peter thought about Johnny, about how long it had taken him to come out. He'd said he’d known he was gay since he was thirteen, and had spent all this time putting on a mask of a person he thought people wanted to see. He'd dated women,  _ married  _ a woman (for all that had turned out to be a disaster), all while knowing that he didn't actually want them they way he was supposed to. It must have been  _ maddening _ .

"Alright," Peter said finally. "You're right, he's probably earned the right to have fun. I'll keep my judgy nose out of his business."

Aunt May chuckled. "That's probably for the best."

"I still don't like the guys he’s spending time with," Peter huffed.

"You don't  _ have  _ to like them Peter," Aunt May said, shaking her head but giving an exasperated smile. "You just have to support your friend."

"Of course I support him," Peter answered, the truth rolling easily off his tongue. "He's my friend, I love him no matter what. I just think he's making bad decisions is all."

"And they're his bad decisions to make," Aunt May said, patting Peter on the knee. "He'll smarten up soon."

Peter snorted. "You'd think, but for a guy who lights himself on fire, he's not very bright."

Aunt May tutted at him. They spent the rest of the night chatting about the various goings on of one another's lives—Peter was thoroughly updated on the latest drama from the book club. For a while, he forgot all about the weird, misshapen feeling in his gut whenever he thought about the men Johnny was going home with. By the time he left to head home, he'd put it out of his mind completely.

Peter decided to swing home, the weather being nice and having a bit of energy even after the portal fiasco. It was nice to swing through the old neighborhood, almost a little nostalgic. With the remains of a hearty, home cooked meal in his stomach, Peter was actually feeling pretty good. He was nearly home when he heard the telltale scuffles of a mugging coming from a secluded alleyway. A quick glance confirmed three thuggish types looming over a young man, shoving him to the ground.

Dropping gracefully out of his swing, Spider-Man landed at the mouth of the alley, cutting the escape route. "Excuse me gentleman, hall monitor here. I need to see a hall pass or I'm going to have to write you up."

The three thuggish types were smarter than their criminal ways gave them credit for, and took off running down the alley the moment they saw him. Spider-men easily webbed them up, the straight, narrow alley making it almost too easy to hit his targets. A few quick tugs had the three thugs webbed up to a wall within seconds.

"I'll have you three hooligans know that loitering in the halls without a hall pass is against the rules. I'm afraid you're going to have to go to detention," Spider-Man said, making sure that the webs were secure. He turned to the young man on the ground. "You okay?"

The young man nodded, slowly getting up. "Yeah, I'm okay," he said.

One of the thugs cursed and struggled against the webs. "Don't think is over Aaron, you little fag! We'll get you one way or another!"

Peter growled. "Alright, that's enough out of you," he said, reaching over and grabbing the thug by the head, slamming it back against the wall and knocking him out cold. "Anyone else?" he snapped at the other two, who shook their heads vigorously.

"Thanks," the young man—Aaron Peter guessed—said, brushing himself off.

"No problem kid," Peter said. "I take exception to people who bully others for stupid reasons."

Aaron chuckled. "Wish there were more people like you in the world. It would make walking alone at night a lot safer."

"You gonna be okay getting home?" Peter asked.

Aaron glanced back at the webbed up thugs. "I don't think going home is a good idea right now," he said quietly.

Peter raised an eyebrow under the mask. He glanced back at the knocked out thug and noticed that he bore a striking resemblance to Aaron. That, and the fact that he'd called Aaron by name made Peter think the two were related, maybe cousins, possibly brothers.

"You got a place to stay?" Peter asked.

Aaron shrugged. "I have a friend in the area who might let me crash on the couch," he said. "After that, who knows?"

"You don't have any sort of family in the city?" Peter asked.

Aaron scoffed. "None that would take me now that I've been outed. Knowing Mom she's called everyone she knows to wail about having a faggot for a son."

Peter winced. "Oof. Well, you must have some friends? Someone to look after you?"

Aaron let out a long, weary sigh, the kind that would be out of place coming from a man twice his age, let alone someone as young as him. "I can probably couch surf for a while until I can get an apartment I guess. I was gonna try to save up some more, but I guess life just wants to suck right now."

"Know how that feels," Peter said with his own weary sigh. "Well, if you ever need help, you can always count on me, alright? I think Stark actually owes me a favor right now, I'm sure I could get him to cough up enough for a rental. Otherwise I can always shake him down for his lunch money, that would probably last you a few months in Manhattan."

Aaron laughed. "I'll keep that in mind. Thanks for saving my skin."

"All in a days work for your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man," Peter said, giving a jaunty salute before swinging away. He landed on the rooftop and carefully followed Aaron for a few blocks to make sure he would be alright, then turned back around to go home.

Crawling in through his window, Peter dumped his webbed up civvies on the floor and stripped out of his suit, heading straight for the shower. Once he was squeaky clean he wrapped himself in a towel and flopped onto his couch, turning on the TV for a little late night channel surfing before bed.

Peter flicked through the channels for a minute, absently taking note of what was on each channel before moving on to the next. Footage of a giant flaming rainbow caught his attention and he stopped, setting down the remote. It was some sort of pop culture 'news' show doing a piece on Johnny, like the hype of him coming out hadn't already fizzled out weeks ago. Peter shook his head, but stayed on the channel anyway. At the very least he could laugh about whatever dumb things they were saying with Johnny when he saw him next.

Suddenly the footage on screen switched to a shaky cell phone camera shot of Johnny coming out of a club. A man followed at his heels, grabbing Johnny around the waist and pulling him in for a rough looking kiss, which Johnny seemed to melt into.

The ugly feeling in Peter's gut came back with a vengeance, chewing on his inside until he felt like he was about to throw up.

He turned off the TV and picked up his mask from the floor. It was going to be another long night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pop culture will tear scientifically accurate dinosaurs out of my cold dead fingers.


	5. Part I.v: Cepheid

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I fought with this chapter so. Fucking. Much. to get it to where the pacing didn't feel like ass. There was a ton that got cut out and extended and manipulated. Some stuff is going into other chapters, but we'll see how that goes when I actually write those chapters. For now, here's this.
> 
> I've been trying to title the chapters after science terms, and I finally found a list of astrophysics terms so I'll be using that from now on to help.
> 
> Triggers for the f-slur.

It was a rare evening that Johnny stayed in these days, but that day had been particularly tough on him. They'd been investigating weird energy readings on a 'deserted' island that had turned out to be home to an interdimensional parasite that wanted to feed on earth's energy and suck it dry. Johnny had needed to go nova in order to stop it, and he was too beat to think about heading out to the club. Besides, it had been a while since he'd spent a night in with his family, he was looking forward to spending time with them.

"Quit hoggin' the remote ya brat," Ben growled, reaching over to snatch the reinforced plastic rectangle out of Johnny's hand.

"Hey!" Johnny huffed, trying to grab it back.

"You're not even watchin' anythin'," Ben griped, holding Johnny back with one huge hand. "You're just channel flippin'."

Johnny rolled his eyes. "Yeah, but  _ you're  _ just going to watch football."

"What's wrong with football?" Ben grumbled, settling down in his chair.

"It's  _ boring _ ," Johnny sighed, flopping down on the couch. "Just a bunch of guys running around tackling each other."

"Woulda thought that'd be right up your alley," Ben sniggered.

"If they were  _ naked  _ maybe," Johnny said, just to watch Ben make a face, "but it's filmed from so far away we barely see any of the good stuff."

"Good stuff like what?" Ben huffed.

"Like all those football player's cute butts," Johnny hummed. "In those nice  _ tight  _ pants."

Ben rolled his eyes. "Remind me not to invite you out to games anymore. Don't want to get banned for inappropriate behavior."

"If we were going to be banned from public places for indecency, your face would have done it years ago," Johnny huffed. Ben grumbled but didn't take the bait, already absorbed in his game. Johnny sighed and flopped down on the couch, resigning himself to a boring afternoon. After a few minutes of barely paying attention to what was going on in the game, Johnny pulled out his phone and started browsing his twitter.

For the most part, Johnny's fans had been completely supportive after he came out. It was actually quite nice to go through all of the sweet messages people left him, though sometimes it made him feel a little silly for having waited so long when people were clearly fine with him being gay.

Of course, not  _ everyone  _ was fine with it.

Johnny was scrolling through his mentions when he saw the tweet. It wasn't from anyone he recognized, just a random person—with a conspicuous American flag in his profile picture—who apparently thought it was a good idea to tag Johnny in his post.

_ @JohnnyStorm is a flaming fag _

Johnny raised an eyebrow. "I mean, no fucking shit?" he muttered aloud.

"What's that?" Ben asked, half paying attention.

"Some guy on twitter," Johnny said. "Called me a 'flaming fag'."

"Ah," Ben said. "Well he's right, technically."

"Right?" Johnny said. "Honestly, I've heard some variation of that 'flaming' crack  _ every day  _ since I came out. The  _ first thing _ you did when I told you was to make fun of me for being flaming. I don't know what this guy thinks he's accomplishing here."

"Probably just lookin' for attention," Ben said, taking a swig of his beer. "They always are."

"I should just get it on a T-shirt or something," Johnny huffed. ""Johnny Storm is a flaming fag'. Honestly, it would save these people a bunch of time."

"Now  _ that  _ would get you banned from public spaces," Ben snorted.

"It would be hilarious though," Johnny said, thinking about every time he'd had to fake laugh yet another clever 'joke' someone made about him being flaming. He'd known right from the start that it would haunt him to the end of his days, and he had made his peace with it, but aside from the obvious connection with his powers, he hadn't really been all that 'flaming' in his outfits or style. In the last few weeks he'd changed his style a little, opting for lower cut shirts with a tighter fit, and more bright colours and patterns, but nothing that would constitute as stereotypically flaming. He was actually using less product in his hair, leaving it more curly and bouncy.

And his makeup.

Johnny had been experimenting with wearing more makeup in public lately. Usually it was just a bit of contour and mascara, maybe some eyeliner if he was feeling more daring, but Johnny had been reserved about doing anything more than that. It wasn't that he didn't  _ want  _ to do more, he was just nervous about how it would land. Would it be too much? Would it seem like he was trying too hard? Would people ridicule him?

Johnny stared down at the tweet on his phone. It was so silly, how something like this could still send him spiraling into self-doubt. Wasn't he supposed to be over this by now? He was out, he was starting his new life as a gay man, why did he care about some homophobe on the internet?

_ You want flaming? _ he thought.  _ I'll  _ **_give_ ** _ you flaming. _

Johnny stood up from the couch. "You know what, screw it, I  _ am  _ getting it on a T-shirt."

"Oh brother," Ben sighed.

"I mean, I've been wanting to get a little crazier with my clothes," Johnny said, starting to pace a bit, getting excited as he started thinking about designs. "This is the perfect excuse."

"Crazier than that getup you've got on?" Ben asked, gesturing to Johnny's person.

"A low cut shirt and tight jeans is not a 'getup', it's barely an outfit," Johnny huffed. "I'm thinking of going for a full on  _ look _ ."

"Riiight," Ben said. "You wanna try that again in English this time?"

Johnny rolled his eyes. "If you're determined not to get it, I'm not going to bother explaining," he said, stalking out of the room.

Ben grumbled and turned back to his game. "Just don't get us  _ actually  _ banned from anythin'!" he called after Johnny, who waved in acknowledgement, already ordering what he needed on his phone.

Johnny had everything he would need express shipped to Baxter, but that still left him a day or two to come up with designs. he more or less knew what he wanted, but it wouldn't hurt to do a few sketches to toss around some ideas. It had been a long time since he'd actually  _ designed  _ anything, and he was having fun tossing around different ideas. Eventually he settled on a design that he liked, something that would capture the essence of what he was trying to say.

Johnny's items arrived after two days, Willie cheerfully delivering them as he always did. Johnny carefully balanced the stack of boxes and headed back to his suite.

"What's all that?" Sue asked as he passed her in the hall.

Johnny grinned at her. "I'm making a statement," he said.

Sue knit her eyebrows together. "Uh-huh, and how much trouble is this 'statement' likely to get you in?" she asked.

Johnny didn't answer, only giving her a shrug and a coy grin. She sighed and left him to his shenanigans.

Johnny had never used a bedazzler before, but the concept seemed simple enough. He'd considered hand-beading for a second, but quickly decided that would be too much work for something that was at least fifty percent a gag. He made sure to get the higher quality beads at least. The tutorials he'd watched recommended using a stencil and to mark where the beads would go on the fabric before gluing them to make sure the design would fit the way he wanted it. The work was incredibly tedious, and Johnny would have to make an appointment with his massage therapist from hunching over his desk, but he told himself it would be worth it in the end.

Once he'd finished the pants, Johnny moved on to the shirt. He'd ordered it with the lettering pre-printed on it, so

he didn't have to worry about that part. He  _ did  _ have to worry about tailoring it to fit him though. It was a good thing he had his own measurements memorized, and he easily took the shirt at the seams. He also picked up his shears and gleefully cut away the bottom of the shirt, leaving enough for a hem.

Johnny held up the finished products, pleased with how they'd turned out. He tossed them over his arm and made his way to the lab to get them treated with unstable molecules. The whole process took about an hour, which left Johnny plenty of time to do his makeup and gather his accessories, including the shoes.

Johnny had had the heels for a while, keeping them from an old Halloween costume from a few years back. They were sensible black pumps, fairly cheap so far as his usual price range for shoes. Every so often Johnny would take them out and practice walking in them, enjoying the way they clicked across the hardwood floors. It had taken him ages to figure out that he needed to shift his weight in his hips in order to keep his balance.

The timer for the unstable molecule machine (it had an official name, but Johnny had never bothered to remember it) went off just as Johnny was putting the last touches on his makeup, using the bright red lipstick he'd had for ages. After a quick jaunt to retrieve the clothes, Johnny finally assembled his outfit.

It had come out much better than Johnny had expected. The black yoga pants clung to him like a second skin, the yellow, orange, and red rhinestones sparkling in the light, creating a stylized flame pattern up one leg and spelling 'flaming' across the butt in bold letters. The crop top T-shirt similarly hugged his figure, the words 'Johnny Storm is a Flaming F*g' written in black against the white fabric. The crop wasn't that high, but the pants were slung low on his hips, leaving a lot of bare skin on display.

Johnny grinned at his reflection, twisting and turning to admire himself. He smoothed his hands down his side, coming to rest at his hip bones. With the heels, red lipstick and aviator sunglasses, Johnny was  _ absolutely  _ flaming. He just knew the media was going to go apeshit the moment he stepped outside, and he couldn't wait to wait to watch everyone lose their minds.

With a final check to make sure there was no lipstick on his teeth, Johnny picked up his wallet and phone, then stopped. If he put them in his pocket, it would bulge out and look funny in the skin tight pants. He didn't want to have to leave behind his phone or wallet, but in his eagerness he'd forgotten to order a bag. He considered a jacket for a moment, then remembered that Sue had a purse that would more or less match with the rest of the outfit.

Johnny stole into Sue's suite, feeling like a teenager trying to sneak out of the house. He quickly found the purse he was looking for (Sue's closet was very organized) and slipped his things into it. He slung the strap over his shoulder, smiling brightly.  _ Now  _ he was ready.

Johnny passed Ben in the kitchen on his way out. Ben looked up and raised the rocky ridge where his eyebrow would be. Johnny suddenly felt a little self-conscious. Maybe he'd gone a little overboard?

"Is that Susie's purse?" Ben asked, eyeing the sparkly clutch.

Johnny shifted his weight on the heels. "Putting my stuff in my pockets ruins the lines of the pants," he explained.

Ben grunted. "And where're you headed?" he asked.

"Just for a walk," Johnny said, shrugging a shoulder. "Gonna give the people what they want."

"Right," Ben said. He finished spreading mustard on his slice of bread and squashed it down on top of the rest of his sandwich. "Well, knock 'em dead kid."

Johnny smiled and relaxed. "Thanks Ben," he said.

Ben grunted and waved him off. Johnny blew him a kiss and trotted the rest of the way to the elevator.

The paparazzi spotted him the moment he stepped out of the building, comically scrambling over one another to snap photographs. Johnny smiled but didn't acknowledge them further, knowing it would only inspire the more brazen ones to try and get closer—most knew better, as Johnny had a habit of melting cameras when they got shoved in his face.

Johnny stuck to well-travelled streets, aiming to be seen by as many people as possible. People stopped and stared, whispering excitedly to one another. One man whistled at him, either trying to be mocking or actually interested. Johnny blew him a kiss, complete with a little fire heart. All the while the flock of paparazzi followed him, trying to circle around him so they could get him from all angles.

After about an hour of walking, Johnny ducked into Ben's third favourite donut shop, just to make it seem like he hadn't come out just to wander around like an attention whore. Everyone in the shop did a double take, and the teen behind the counter looked like she was going to start hyperventilating.

"Hey," Johnny said, slipping off his sunglasses and smiling at her.

"Hi," the girl said, clearly forgetting she was working.

Johnny chuckled. "Could I get a dozen donuts to go please?" he asked.

The girl snapped back to reality. "Oh! Uh, right, of course. For here or to—ah, right, sorry," she babbled, flustered.

"Take your time," Johnny said, leaning a hip against the counter. Out of his peripheral vision he saw no less than three phones out and pointed at him.

Eventually the girl managed to box up his order and ring him up. She handed over the box and the receipt. "Will that be everything?" she asked, customer service voice back in practice.

"That's all, thank you," Johnny said, flashing her another smile. He turned to walk out of the store when someone sitting at a booth jumped up.

"Human Torch!" they called, loud enough to be too loud. "Can I get a picture?"

Johnny smiled. "Sure, anything for a fan."

The group of teens in the booth jumped up and scurried over, chatting excitedly. Johnny posed for a few minutes, borrowing a pen from one of the teens to sign as many clean napkins as they could find. A few other patrons joined in, including the girl behind the counter ("I'm technically not allowed to do this on the clock, don't tell my boss"). Johnny didn't mind the delay, though he could feel the paparazzi hovering outside.

Eventually Johnny managed to extract himself and left the shop, heading back the way he'd come. He considered flaming on and flying back, as his feet were starting to hurt a little—walking long distances through the streets was a lot different than practicing in the halls of his suite—but he persisted until he reached home. He'd been out for about an hour, plenty of time for the pictures to hit the news.

Johnny slipped out of his shoes as soon as he got back to the common floor. "I'm back!" he called, receiving no response. "I brought donuts!"

"Where from?" Ben asked, poking his head around the corner. Johnny held up the box and he grinned. "Knew there was a reason we kept you around, Matchstick."

"All the times I've saved our hides notwithstanding," Johnny remarked, dodging Ben's hand trying to swipe the box from him. He made his way to the kitchen and set the box down on the counter, snagging two donuts before Ben descended on it. "Didn't you just have lunch?"

"So? That was lunch. This is donuts," Ben huffed, stuffing a donut in his mouth. He looked Johnny up and down. "Have a good walk?"

Johnny grinned and leaned back against the counter. "Lots of people with cameras out today," he remarked.

Ben snorted. "I'll bet. You're gonna give Sue a coronary one of these days."

"My sister is in perfect health," Johnny huffed. "Which is more than I can say for you. You should be thinking about your poor heart."

"My heart's fine," Ben grumbled around another donut. He glanced down at Johnny's outfit again. "This gonna be a regular thing?"

Johnny shrugged. "Probably, though maybe not this shirt. It's more of a statement piece," he said. "I like how the pants came out though."

Ben nodded. "Alright then. Let me know if I need to clobber anyone who gives you a hard time about it."

Johnny smiled. "Thanks Ben."

Ben grunted, snagging another donut before heading back to the living room. Johnny pulled his phone out of his borrowed purse and went searching through his social media. Sure enough, his Twitter has exploded and he'd been tagged on Instagram, messages flooding in from every angle.

_ OMG did y'all see this!!!???  _ 👀👀

_ yaaaas queen! work it! _ 😍🙌

_ What's @johnnystorm doing with all that tummy out? trying to make every man in NYC die of thirst?  _ 😩😩😩💦💦

Johnny smiled and liked a couple comments, responding to a few of them. Some of the paparazzi shots were pretty good, and Johnny was very pleased with how the outfit looked at a distance. The shirt was a statement piece and he probably wouldn't wear it again, but that didn't mean he wouldn't start incorporating more eccentric looks into his outfits.

He might have to practice in his heels a little more.

"Johnny?" Sue called, wandering into the kitchen. "Do you know why PR is blowing up my pho—" she stopped, taking in Johnny's outfit and the donuts he'd obviously just run out to get. Johnny smiled innocently at her and she sighed. "Never mind."

"Donut?" Johnny offered, gesturing to the box.

"No thanks," Sue said, turning and stalking from the kitchen. A minute later she marched back in, grabbed two donuts, then marched back out again. Johnny very carefully did not laugh.

* * *

Peter was on his way out to go swinging, one foot hanging out of the window, when his phone pinged. He considered ignoring it, but ultimately decided to check it just in case.

He immediately regretted it when he saw what popped up, nearly falling out of the window.

It was another gossip piece about Johnny. Peter apparently hadn't learned his lesson from last time and disabled the notifications for the tabloid nonsense that followed Johnny everywhere, despite the fact that lately it was just filling him with vicious, unidentifiable emotions that chewed on his guts whenever he saw another story about Johnny being spotted with another man. Even more bizarre, Peter sometimes found himself masochistically seeking out new images and stories of Johnny in the arms of strangers, torturing himself by feeding the weird feelings he was having every time he saw his friend with barely covered marks.

"You really do create your own problems," Peter hissed at himself, trying not to crush his phone in his hand.

The source of Peter's ire this time was an online tabloid that posted paparazzi photos as fast as they possibly could. Johnny had been spotted coming out of the Baxter building, which shouldn't have been noteworthy at all, except for the outfit that Johnny was wearing. Peter choked when he saw it.

Johnny was not a shy man, and had no qualms about showing skin, no matter how weather-inappropriate it was. Peter had seen Johnny sans clothing a few times before—the incident at the waterpark came to mind—but there was something about the way the crop top framed Johnny's stomach that made it seem all the more risqué. The sparkling stones across the back of the pants drew the eye to the plump curve of Johnny's ass, and Peter would have a hard time looking away if it weren't for the makeup.

Johnny had been getting more obvious with his makeup, but nothing like  _ this _ . He looked like he belonged at a red carpet kind of event, not a random street in New York. He'd done some kind of subtle smoky look with his eyeshadow, contoured his face to make his cheekbones sharp enough to cut yourself on, and the  _ lipstick _ .

Dear sweet God, the  _ lipstick _ .

A deep, dark red, the colour perfectly complemented Johnny's complexion, and made the whole look vampy and sexy. Peter felt his mouth go dry, his eyes glued to the close up photo, the colour highlighting the poutiness of his lips. Peter had never noticed before, but Johnny had really full and plump lips, with a cute little cupid's bow and framed by cute little dimples.

It was like his mouth was  _ made  _ for kissing.

Peter tossed his phone across the room and threw himself out of the window. He swung until he was nearly all the way across town, trying to scrub the mental image of Johnny's red mouth out from the back of his eyeballs. What was Johnny thinking, wearing something like that in public? It was like he was trying to send the media into a frenzy.

_ Knowing him, that's  _ exactly  _ what he's trying to do _ , Peter thought, gritting his teeth. Johnny thrived on attention, and this was exactly the kind of thing he'd do to get it. With any luck, this would be a one-time thing, a gag to send the gossip mongers into a tizzy then laughed about later on. After the media calmed down, Peter would never have to see or think about Johnny in lipstick ever again.

A mushroom cloud of smoke billowed up over Lincoln Square.  _ Perfect _ , Peter thought, changing his direction.  _ Something to punch. Just what the doctor ordered. _

'Something' turned out to be the Serpent Society throwing a semi-literal hissy fit across a couple blocks. Spider-Man swung down in the middle of the action, the Avengers already on the scene. Forgoing his usual witty one-liner, Spider-Man immediately started to web and kick criminals in the face.

"Watch it!" Hawkeye snapped when a webline nearly clipped him.

Peter ignored him, too focused on working out his weird emotions on snake people. He hardly noticed who he was punching, only paying attention enough to differentiate friend from foe. It worked until there was no one else to punch.

"Well that went by quickly," Iron Man said, hovering a foot off the ground. "Good job everyone. You're all invited for cake and ice cream back at my house. Later!"

"Oh no you don't," Captain America huffed, grabbing onto Tony's boot before he could fly off. "We still need to clean up."

Tony groaned. "Oh  _ come on _ , I thought I was your favourite?"

"It's Power Man's turn to be the favourite," Steve said, not missing a beat. "Help secure everyone until SHIELD comes to pick them up."

"Does that mean  _ I  _ can go home?" Luke asked.

"No," Steve answered, already moving off to help with an overturned car.

Peter considered swinging off anyway, knowing that—while he'd get an earful later—there was nothing Cap could do to actually stop him. He noticed a young woman trying to climb over some rubble in order to reach her boyfriend that she'd been separated from and sighed, walking over to help her.

"Clean fight," Spider Woman remarked while they moved a slab of sidewalk aside together. "You were quieter than usual. Something up?"

"No," Peter said curtly, giving the sidewalk a final shove. It moved about five feet, grinding against the road and cracking where his hands had pushed it.

"Riiiiight," Jessica said. "I can practically  _ see  _ the tension coming off of you. You sure you're cool?"

Peter gritted his teeth. "I'm  _ fine _ ," he snapped.

Jessica huffed. "What crawled up your ass?" She turned and went to go help Thor with… whatever Thor was doing. Peter sighed and made a mental note to find some way to apologize at some point, when he didn't feel like ripping someone's head off. He tried to focus on moving more debris and not thinking about certain blonde friends of his in bright red lipstick.

_ It was a really nice colour on him though. _

Peter put his fist through a fallen sign, swearing under his breath. He noticed Wolverine staring at him a second later. Peter stared back. "Thought I saw a cockroach," he explained.

Wolverine shook his head and walked off. Peter resisted the urge to give him the finger.

Eventually they cleared the worst of it. "Good work team," Cap said, sanctimonious as ever. He caught Iron Man's eyes and got that quirk in his mouth he always had when he was being an asshole. "Remember to show up for cake and ice cream at Stark Tower later."

"That was a joke," Tony said. "I was joking. Don't come to my house."

Peter didn't bother to watch the ensuing squabble. As entertaining as it always was to watch Steve and Tony bicker like a married couple, Peter still had too much energy to burn off. He swung off, still itching under his skin and trying to keep his mind and hands busy.

It was the middle of the night when Spider-Man finally decided to call it quits. He'd kicked the crap out of enough muggers, burglars, carjackers, and other assorted criminal types to fill his quota for the whole week, with the added bonus of not thinking about lipstick anymore. All he was thinking about was crawling in through his window, taking a long shower, and sleeping until he had to be at work.

Peter climbed into his apartment, nearly face planting onto the floor. He was about to start peeling off his suit when he heard something buzzing across the room.  _ His phone _ , he remembered—he'd tossed it across the room earlier like it had burned him. Biting his lip, Peter trotted over to fish it out from the back of the couch, praying that it wasn't cracked.

The phone Gods were merciful that day, and Peter's phone was no more cracked or dented than it had been earlier. The buzzing was because he was getting a call—Peter's stomach sank when he saw that it was Johnny.

For a moment Peter thought about declining the call, ignoring Johnny for a while. Whatever was going on with him, he clearly wasn't over it enough that seeing Johnny live his new life didn't send him into knots. It was more tempting than it should have been, the urge to blow Johnny off until he figured himself out, but Peter found himself pressing 'accept'. It wasn't Johnny's fault Peter couldn't keep his shit together.

"Peter!" Johnny barked as soon as Peter picked up. "What the hell man, I've been trying to call you for hours."

"I forgot my phone at home," Peter lied. "What's up, you need something?"

"Uh, did you forget?" Johnny asked, sounding both incredulous and offended.

_ Movie night _ , Peter's brain decided to remind him just then. "Shit, I'm so sorry, I completely forgot."

"So I gathered," Johnny said with a resigned sigh that made Peter feel like a heel. "You're out really late. I guess it must have been something important?"

There was no way Peter was ever getting his deposit back anyway, but his landlord probably wouldn't appreciate it if he put his head through the wall. "Yup, super important," he lied through his teeth like a lying liar.

"Are you okay?" Johnny asked. "Do you need me to come over and play nurse?"

"Nope, I'm good," Peter said, banishing the thought of Johnny in one of those stupid nurse's costumes. What a completely inappropriate thought about one of his closest friends.

"Good enough for a late movie or do you just want to crash?" Johnny asked. "I can head over to your place if you're too tired to swing?"

Peter bit his lip, debating for a moment. It had been a while since they had actually been able to do movie night, every other night they'd planned having been crashed by some sort of catastrophe. It was probably a really shitty move to cancel on Johnny just because Peter was having weird feelings about seeing his friend in makeup.

"Or we can reschedule again, it's cool," Johnny said after Peter had spent too long in his own head.

"No, come over," Peter said, instantly regretting it but committed now. "Just don't make fun of the mess my place is."

"No promises," Johnny chuckled. "See you in a bit!"

"Right, see you," Peter said, then they hung up. Peter looked around at his disaster of an apartment and sighed, starting to gather up the various discarded socks he'd left around.

Johnny arrived just as Peter was finishing running a broom across the floor, coming in through the window Peter had left open. He flamed off and was thankfully not wearing any makeup or crop tops. "Hey man, long time no see," he said, stepping forward for a quick hug.

"Guess we've both been busy," Peter said, giving Johnny a squeeze.

"Your place looks fine by the way," Johnny said, extracting himself from Peter and setting down a bag of snacks and DVD's on the coffee table. "It's a lot better than the last time I was here."

"Last time you were here, you threw a party with the Universal Inhumans and trashed the place," Peter huffed. "My bathroom has never been the same."

"Oh yeah, I guess it has been a while since I was here," Johnny said, conveniently dodging the rest of the sentence. "I didn't know what movies you had, so I brought a couple."

"I do have Netflix you know," Peter said, but helped Johnny set up anyway. A few minutes later they'd settled on the couch and were munching away on popcorn as the movie began to play.

Peter tried to stay in the present, tried to keep his attention on the movie, but it was harder than it should have been. He couldn't stop thinking about the photo from earlier, about Johnny dressed up like that. Had it been a gag? A stunt for the newspapers? Johnny had been wearing makeup more and more lately, but nothing like  _ that _ . Peter tried not to think about it, but he couldn't help but be curious.

"So," he said, finally unable to take it anymore. "Saw your outfit from earlier. Pranking the PR department again?"

Johnny turned to him and grinned. "A little bit. They honestly make it too easy to mess with them," he said. His eyes softened slightly. "But… part of it was also for me."

"For you?" Peter asked.

Johnny ate a handful of popcorn. "I've always really liked makeup, and dressing up. It's a lot of fun, and there are a lot of styles that guys just don't get to wear, especially when they're desperately trying to stay in the closet."

"Right," Peter said, already not liking where this was going.

Johnny continued. "I've been wanting to do more with my style, experiment a little, push boundaries. It's the twenty-first century and gender is a social construct, why shouldn't I wear makeup and dress up a little?"

_ Because it gives me weird feelings and I'm not sure why _ , Peter thought, but he knew he'd get punched and/or roasted for saying so. "I mean, I guess if it makes you happy," he said.

Johnny raised an eyebrow at him. "Gee, don't hurt yourself with all that enthusiasm," he said.

"Sorry," Peter said, rubbing the back of his neck. "I guess I just don't really  _ get  _ it? I mean, I wear coverup if I've got a bruise I want to hide or something, but I've never thought about wearing makeup just to  _ wear  _ makeup."

"That's fine, you don't have to get it," Johnny said. "No one is asking you to wear makeup."

"I know that, I'm not that much of an asshole," Peter huffed, nudging Johnny playfully. "I guess I was mostly just shocked. You kind of sprung it on everyone out of the blue."

Johnny smiled. "I wanted it to be a surprise," he said. His smile faded and he shifted self consciously. "Did it look okay?"

Peter thought back to the image he'd been trying to forget all day. The fitted crop top, the sparkly pants, the makeup, the  _ lipstick _ . "It looked good," he said, fighting to keep his voice steady. What was  _ wrong  _ with him?

Johnny smiled brightly, his whole face lighting up almost literally. "Really? It looked good?"

"Yeah, it was quite the outfit," Peter said. "The shirt was a bit much."

Johnny chuckled. "That was more of a one-time thing for the paparazzi. People kept calling me 'flaming' without really knowing what that meant."

"You're gay and you literally light on fire, I think that's what they mean," Peter said.

Johnny snorted. "Yeah yeah, but 'flaming' implies a certain amount of performative camp. My outfits and manner were not enough to be truly  _ flaming  _ by any means."

"I have no idea what you're talking about, but I trust you," Peter chuckled. "So I guess you're going to start wearing makeup more?"

"Yup," Johnny chirped, pleased with himself. "Today was kind of a test run, so we'll see what happens, but I think I really like wearing makeup in public."

Against his will, Peter's eyes dropped to Johnny's mouth, vividly recalling how well the red lipstick had made them stand out. He ripped his gaze away and smiled at Johnny. "That's great," he said, wondering why it was so hard to get the words out.

Johnny smiled and settled back against the couch to watch the movie that they'd been ignoring. Peter tried to watch the movie, but for some reason he couldn't focus, he was too hyper aware of Johnny's presence next to him. It was like that first night Johnny had come home from the Negative Zone, when he could hardly pay attention to anything around him because all he'd wanted to do was watch Johnny. It had been so astounding at the time, to have his best friend back from the dead, alive and healthy and annoying and  _ alive  _ as ever. Twice while Johnny had been moving back out Peter had nearly changed his mind, begged Johnny to stay where he could keep an eye on him.

It had taken Peter a long time to stop having nightmares about a world without the Human Torch in it.

Eventually they finished the movie and Johnny left, leaving the uneaten snacks for Peter to have. Peter finished cleaning up and finally crawled into bed, planning on sleeping until the last possible moment and swinging to work to save time. He closed his eyes and almost immediately dropped off to sleep.

Peter was high in the air, New York miles beneath him, glittering with light. Above him the sky was filled with stars, so many that it was as if it was a reflection of the city below. Peter felt weightless, calm and peaceful, all of his fears and worries melting away. He let out a long sigh, his breath puffing like a cloud. Was it cold? Peter couldn't tell.

A shining light in the sky caught Peter's attention. It was a star, coming down from the heavens towards him. Peter realized then that he was flying up to meet it. Peter reached out, reaching for the star. The star reached back to him and they met somewhere between heaven and earth, glittering reflections of one another.

Peter wrapped his arms around the star, laughing and swinging it around, so happy to have it back.  _ I missed you _ , he didn't need to say because of course the star would understand. He'd missed the star so much, he'd been so sad when it went away, but now it was back and Peter didn't think he'd ever been this happy.

They flew through the sky for a while, for years, sometimes racing and sometimes chasing each other. Sometimes they were rivals, sometimes they worked together, always they were better together.  _ You make me feel like myself _ , Peter told the star. He'd been so sad, but the star had made him smile again.

Eventually the star stopped, landing on the head of a giant queen, fitting like a jewel in her crown. Peter landed beside him, feeling right at home in this familiar place, this spot just for them. The star smiled at him and offered him fruits and berries. They shared them with one another, juices staining their mouths. The star laughed, licking his lips and colouring them red. Peter stared at him, suddenly overwhelmed by the urge to taste the red juice on the star's lips. He leaned over, one hand coming up to tilt the star's chin up so Peter could press his mouth to his. Above them, the glittering stars began to explode like fireworks.

Then Peter woke up.

For a moment Peter just laid in bed, the dream floating in that space between waking and sleeping. He felt like there was something important he should be remembering from it, but it was already starting to fade away. Something about a star? Flying? Had he been in space? Peter shook his head and checked his phone, swearing and leaping out of bed when he realized he was late.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh Pete, you're so fucking stupid.
> 
> Also guess who's still Stony trash after all this fucking time?


	6. Part I.vi: Ephemeris

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had this finished last night, but I figured I'd let it sit until morning. I kept having pacing issues with these last two chapters, but I think I've figured it out now. Hopefully that means I can get chapters out more quickly.
> 
> No real triggers this chapter I guess? Unless you're triggered by Peter being an idiot.

The media exploded following Johnny's little stunt. It was like Johnny had come out all over again. Duplicate clothing articles popped up across the city until Fantastic Four INC stepped in and slapped down a trademark, selling the clothes from the gift shop at Baxter and donating the profits to LGBT charities. People talked about it for days, with the tones running from applauding Johnny for being so brave and daring to decrying him as a dangerous transvestite here to ruin gender for everyone.

Johnny took it all in stride, thriving on the attention. There were still mean comments on the internet, but he was having too much fun to actually care. He felt like he was on top of the world.

"Johnny, you know I support you no matter what, but you really need to contact the PR department _before_ you do things like this," Sue said, watching a news clip of Johnny after a race, taking off his helmet to reveal a full face of makeup underneath.

"Those guys are a total drag though," Johnny huffed, trying to concentrate on getting the nail polish even. "Every time I talk to them they're freaking out about something."

"Because you only ever talk to them _after_ you've done something crazy," Sue huffed. "You're not sixteen anymore Johnny, you don't need to ask for permission to do anything, but you should at least let them know beforehand so they can be prepared for the inevitable hurricane."

Johnny bit his lip, deciding not to tell Sue about how he'd tried that with the race, only for several agents to 'politely' suggest that he do something less outlandish instead, like only wear a bit of eyeliner or earrings or something. One of them sent a strongly worded note begging him to just call off the race.

"Fine," Johnny sighed dramatically. "I'll send them a memo next time."

"That's all we're asking Johnny," Sue said. She glanced over at Johnny trying to put the polish on his dominant hand with his non-dominant hand. "Need help?"

"Ugh, no thanks," Johnny said, putting the brush back in the bottle. "I wanted to try it out, but I don't think I like this look. It's not for me."

"Do you need remover?" Sue asked.

"I can probably just burn it off," Johnny said. He lit up his hands, but the polish only warped. "Damn."

"You borrowed that from me, didn't you?" Sue asked. She rolled her eyes at Johnny's sheepish but guilty grin. "Stop taking my stuff. If you want to borrow something, just ask."

"But that's no fun," Johnny said, slumping over on the couch to lay his head on her shoulder. "It's way more satisfying to try and sneak around. It's like being a teenager again."

"You stopped being a teenager at some point?" Sue asked, but Johnny could tell she was hiding a grin. "Come on, I've got some remover that works on unstable molecule nail polish," she said, getting up from the couch and letting Johnny fall over.

Johnny snatched up the bottle from the coffee table and followed her. "You know what we should do? One of those 'who wore it better' things. Or matching outfits. Something fun like that."

Sue chuckled. "I can call the stylists and have them work something out." They reached her bathroom and she searched under the bathroom sink. She made a huffing noise and switched to searching the cabinet. She turned to Johnny. "Did you take the remover?"

"Why would I have taken it?" Johnny asked, setting the bottle of polish on the counter. "If I had taken it I wouldn't have tried to burn the polish off."

"Well it's not here," Sue said, checking all of the cabinets again. She stepped back and seemed to think for a second. "I might know where it went."

Johnny followed her through the winding halls to the labs, eventually getting to the chemical lab. A gaggle of children were clustered around a table, chattering excitedly. On one corner of the table was a bottle of nail polish remover.

Sue sighed and stalked into the labs. "Kids? Any particular reason you have my nail polish remover?" she asked, crossing her arms and tapping her foot. Johnny shifted on his feet, remembering all the times as a kid she'd turned that stance on him when he'd done something wrong.

To their credit, most of the children looked appropriately sheepish. "We thought of an experiment, but we needed acetone that had been affected by unstable molecules," Valeria explained.

"And you could make some on your own?" Sue asked, raising one blonde eyebrow.

"We're not allowed to mix chemicals without Dr. Richards or Dragon Man present," Alex explained. "Not after what happened last time."

"Right," Sue said with a sigh. "Listen, I don't mind you borrowing it, but you need to _ask_ , okay kids?"

There was a grumble of agreement from the group. Sue shook her head and turned to leave the room, giving Johnny a pat on the arm as she passed.

Johnny chuckled and walked to the table to pick up the bottle. "Do you guys still need this or can I take it?"

"We're finished with it Uncle Johnny," Val said.

"Thanks kids, don't blow yourselves up," Johnny said. He went to leave but stopped when he felt a tug on his sleeve.

"Johnny Storm, I must ask you something important," Tong implored, gazing up at him with her slitted, bulbous eyes.

"What's up kiddo?" Johnny asked, curious.

Tong fidgeted. "Are you like me?" she asked.

For a moment Johnny was confused by what she meant, but then he realized that she was asking if he was transgender. "No sweetie, I'm not," he said gently. "I like to wear makeup, but I'm still a man."

"But isn't makeup for girls though?" Bentley piped up.

"Not necessarily," Johnny answered. "Gender identity and gender expression overlap a lot, but they aren't the same thing."

"You started to wear makeup after coming out as a homosexual," Vil chimed. "Do you have a different gender expression because of that?"

"Sexual orientation is completely unrelated to one's own personal gender," Val answered before Johnny could say anything.

"But he only started using makeup _after_ coming out of the closet," Bentley pointed out. "You can't deny there's a link."

Val glared at him. "Correlation does not equal causation," she huffed.

Bentley glared back. "I didn't being homosexual _caused_ him to like makeup, I said there was a probable link."

"Okay," Johnny cut in before there was a bloodbath. "So to answer your questions, yes, I started wearing makeup after I came out as gay, but it was less because being gay _made_ me like makeup and more that I was finally confident enough in my identity to start expressing myself _with_ makeup. Val is right in that sexuality doesn't determine anything to do with one's gender, but Bentley isn't wrong in saying that there's a link between alternative gender expression and being non-heterosexual."

"How can they both be right?" Mik asked.

"It isn't so much so that being gay or lesbian _causes_ you to have a different gender expression as it is that the community is more open to _allowing_ you to explore those sides of yourself. I'd bet a lot more straight men would wear makeup if it was socially acceptable for them to wear makeup," Johnny explained. "Makeup is like clothing, or your hairstyle, it's a personal thing that's up to the individual. Lots of gay men don't like makeup, lots of straight women don't like makeup. It's up to the person to decide whether or not they want to wear makeup."

There was a murmur of excited curiosity. "But how would one tell if they preferred makeup or not?" Wu asked.

Johnny thought about it for a moment. "Well, I suppose you'd have to just try it out for yourself."

Tong bounced excitedly on her heels. "I would like to try on the makeup!"

Johnny smiled. "Sure, we can use mine."

"Can I try too?" Onome asked, setting off a chain reaction of children clamoring to try on makeup.

"Alright alright, we can all try on makeup," Johnny said, feeling slightly emotional all of a sudden.

Bentley rolled his eyes. "I have no desire to try on any makeup, thank you. I shall abstain," he huffed.

Johnny grinned. "You sure?" he asked.

Bentley crossed his arms. " _Quite_ sure."

"Alright," Johnny said, "but I do have a _black_ lipstick if you change your mind."

With that, Johnny turned to help Alex herd the other children down the hall towards the elevator. Counting down from ten, Johnny reached an impressive three before Bentley caught up to the rest of them. "Do you have black eyeshadow as well?" he asked.

"Sure do," Johnny said, smiling brightly.

They took the elevator up to Johnny's floor, the children immediately overrunning the place. Johnny went and fetched his makeup bag for everyone. He would probably have to replace some stuff after this, no doubt someone would get excited and drop something, but it was worth it to see everyone so happy.

"Okay, Tong asked first, so she gets to go first," Johnny said, picking up his brushes and a pallet. "What colours do you want?"

"Pink!" Tong exclaimed. "I wish to embrace the colour of traditional femininity, despite knowing that I am an independent woman who does not need any male protection!"

Johnny laughed. "Alright then, pink it is," he said.

It was difficult to work on someone else, especially a squirming child, but Johnny managed to get Tong's makeup looking nice. He had to improvise a little, seeing as the Moloids face structure was so different, but Tong was especially pleased with the blush and the pink lipgloss. For Onome he used golds and shiny purples, and Bentley of course demanded black. Johnny ran into a slight problem with Vil and Wu and their helmets, but solved it by bringing out some of his clothes and accessories so they could play dress up. Everyone ran around excitedly, complimenting each other's makeup and pretending they were off to a fancy party (Johnny had lost track of the narrative sometime around the party being on Jupiter and they needed to build a spaceship that would withstand the harsh climate of the gas giant).

Everyone was having so much fun that they lost track of time, hardly noticing Reed coming in until he was standing next to Johnny as he was putting false eyelashes on Alex. "What all this?" he asked.

"An experiment," Alex answered, blinking a few times to get used to the weight on his eyelids.

"An experiment," Reed repeated. "That involves makeup?"

"It's a social experiment!" Val declared. She was wearing one of Johnny's large silk scarves like a cape, trailing it around behind her. She'd demanded that Johnny draw a mustache and beard on her instead of traditional makeup. "We're exploring the intersection between gender identity and gender expression, as well as debating the nature of the gender binary as it exists in our current society and other cultures."

"I see," Reed hummed, starting to look interested. "I suppose it's certainly a relevant topic, given the current sociopolitical climate. What have you determined so far?"

"Decorating one's body with colourful paints and powders is found in all cultures. Gendered distinctions between how the colours are applied and which colours correspond to certain genders are arbitrary." Korr said. He threw up his arms. "Makeup is fun!"

"Bodily decoration is a sign of individuality and personal distinction," Vil said, admiring the silk ribbon that had been tied around her helmet. "It is probable that this is one of the hallmarks of a civilization and sapience in a species."

"Cultures can be vastly different in how they perceive gender in how it relates to biological sex," Onome said. "As well as how those genders are expressed. For example, there is a garment in Wakanda that an American would perceive as a dress or a skirt, but it is primarily worn by those identifying as men."

Reed nodded along. "Very good points everyone. Alex? What's your take on it?"

"It feels weird," Alex said, still blinking and making gestures like he wanted to rub his eyes, "but damn if I don't look good."

Reed chuckled. "Alright then, I'll leave you to it. Write up your points later and we can bring them up next class."

He started to turn to leave, but Val ran to cling to his leg. "Dad, you should get your makeup done!" she insisted.

"That's okay sweetie, I'm not really interested in makeup. It's not for me," Reed said, though he leaned down to scoop her into his arms.

"Have you ever _tried_ makeup?" Johnny asked.

Reed raised an eyebrow. "I can't say that I have. Not outside of having it done for television anyway."

"If you haven't tried makeup, how can you be certain it's 'not for you'?" Bentley asked. Along with the black lipstick, he'd demanded winged eyeliner 'sharp enough to cut a man'.

Reed paused. "I suppose that's a fair question. I've never felt any desire to try it, but my socialization has been entirely as a heterosexual man—"

"A _cisgendered_ heterosexual man," Tong corrected.

"A cisgendered heterosexual man," Reed agreed, settling Val on his hip. "Maybe I've never wanted to try it because I've never been raised to _want_ to try it." He smiled down at Val and tugged her scarf around her head. "I suppose it wouldn't hurt to give it a chance."

Johnny chuckled and gestured for Reed to take a seat. Reed sat and pulled Valeria so she was sitting on his lap. "Any particular colour you want?" Johnny asked, reaching for his pallets.

"I'll leave that up to you," Reed said, smiling at Johnny. "I'm trusting you to not make me look terrible."

"If I can put makeup on squirming children, I can put makeup on you," Johnny said. He tapped his brush against the side of the pallet. "I think we should do something with blue and silver. That would look nice on you."

Reed chuckled and obediently held still while Johnny did his makeup. Eventually Ben came up to find them and laughed at them until the Moloid's cornered him and demanded that he try it too. Johnny used a shiny orange eyeshadow as highlight and put false eyelashes on him, declaring it the best he could do with 'what he had to work with'.

It was silly and all in good fun, and Johnny was happy to show off his skills and share them with everyone. "So, what do you think?" Johnny asked Reed. "Gonna start wearing makeup for your regular look now?"

"I don't think so," Reed said, smiling. Johnny had contoured his cheekbones to look all the more defined. "This was fun though."

Johnny looked around at the children, who by now had torn or ripped most of the clothes he'd let them use. The Moloids had taken his lip glosses and were trying to paint Ben with them. Later Sue would huff and puff at him for making such a mess. But the children all looked so happy, and were having so much fun, Johnny couldn't be too concerned about it.

"Yeah, it was pretty fun," Johnny said.

* * *

Peter was trying not to let it bother him, but it was getting harder to deny that something was going on with him when it came to Johnny. No matter what he did, he couldn't seem to shake off the weird reaction he got whenever he saw Johnny with another man or wearing makeup, which was more and more often lately. He'd tried to tell himself that he just needed to get used to it, that this was who Johnny was now, but it was like his body didn't want to listen. Every time he saw Johnny in the news or on some gossip magazine, either all made up or wrapped around some strange man or _both_ , Peter had the overwhelming urge to hurt something.

Frustratingly, the world didn't seem to understand his predicament, and everywhere Peter turned there was more news about Johnny. The media couldn't seem to get enough of Johnny, plastering his face over magazines, posters, across television and the internet, anywhere they could. It was a whole new height of obsession with Johnny, who hadn't been this popular since the Rawhide Kid.

Still, Peter tried not to let it show. Johnny was his friend, and whatever Peter's feelings on it were _his_ problem to deal with. Besides, Peter was pretty sure if he tried to bring it up with Johnny, he'd end up one crispy spider.

 _It's not your place to tell Johnny what he can or can't do with his body_ , Peter told himself, glaring down at the cover of a tabloid that was loudly speculating about a potential orgy that Johnny may or may not have been involved in due to the number of love marks spotted across his skin. It was nothing but another salacious claim trying to get suckers to buy the embarrassment to journalism's excuse for a magazine, but Peter couldn't help but grind his teeth at the thought of Johnny in the middle of an orgy.

"Hey buddy," the newsstand vendor barked at him, "if you're trying to set that rag on fire with your brain or something, buy it first."

Peter grumbled and hurried on, trying to put the mental image out of his head. It wasn't any of his business who Johnny slept with, or what he wore. He didn't have to like it, he just had to be supportive.

He was actually on his way to meet Johnny. They didn't usually hang out outside of costume or the privacy of movie night, not wanting to tie plain Peter Parker to the Fantastic Four too much, but they were connected enough that it wasn't unheard of for them to be in the same place. Johnny had also promised to keep a low profile so people wouldn't recognize him, but that meant very little. Johnny was incredibly recognizable and he loved attention, and people were always on the lookout for him, now more than ever.

They'd decided to meet up for coffee and then head out to an art show. The café Johnny had picked was upscale and probably completely overpriced, but Johnny was also paying so Peter wouldn't complain that much. The interior was done up to look 'rustic', with rough wood and red flannel. Instead of a traditional bar type counter to one side of the room, there was a square counter in the middle of the space, with the barista standing in the middle, turning this way and that to serve customers sitting at the counter. If Peter a dollar for every pair of antlers he could see, he'd probably be able to afford one of the ridiculously overpriced coffees they sold at this hipster monstrosity.

"Gentrification is a plague," Peter grumbled, looking around for Johnny. Someone waved at him and Peter looked up to see Johnny sitting at a table jammed into a corner. Peter waved back and made his way over.

Johnny stood up and Peter's mouth went dry. His makeup wasn't as crazy as Peter had seen in some of the paparazzi shots, but there was something about the slightly shimmery copper-coloured lipstick that seemed so daring, like Johnny was inviting people to stare at his mouth. Peter resisted the urge to impale himself on one of the antler mounts on the wall.

"You're late," Johnny said, wrapping Peter in a quick hug. "Something happen? Vulture? Sandman?"

"No, nothing happened," Peter said, giving Johnny a one armed squeeze before they parted and sat down.

"Ah, so you're late because you're just a _regular_ human disaster who can't keep to a schedule to save his life," Johnny huffed, grinning at him.

"There's nothing regular about me," Peter huffed, settling into the cheap plastic chair that had been given a terrible flannel slip that slid and bunched under him whenever he moved.

"Well, lucky for you, the gallery doesn't open for another two hours, so we have plenty of time," Johnny said.

"Nice to hear it," Peter said, trying to adjust so he wasn't sliding off his chair. "Where the hell did you even hear about this crappy place?"

A server suddenly appeared at their table, wearing a flannel shirt, a slouchy beanie, and sporting a thick beard that had been curled with wax at the ends. Peter would bet his rent money that he had a man-bun under his dumb hat. "Hi, welcome to Buck's. What can I get you?"

"You have that giant ass square counter in the middle of the room, but _also_ floor service?" Peter blurted out before he could stop himself.

" _Peter_ ," Johnny warned.

"It makes no sense is all," Peter defended. "What's the point of having that thing take up so much room if you're just going to have servers running around, clogging up the aisles? It seems an inefficient use of space."

To his credit, the server didn't immediately throw him out. "We at Buck's pride ourselves in putting the customer first at all times. What can I get for you?"

"A menu?" Peter suggested.

"All of our items are on the board sir," the server said, gesturing to the chalkboards arranged in a square above the counter.

"So a giant, unnecessary square counter like a self-serve place, but also floor service like a sit-down place, but _also_ also no menus, like a self-serve place," Peter listed. Johnny groaned and thumped his head against the table. "Right, makes _perfect_ sense," Peter said.

"I am _so_ sorry," Johnny said to the server. "I'll have a mocha frappe, extra whipped cream."

"Black coffee," Peter said.

"Flavour shot?" the server asked, scribbling their orders down on a notepad.

Peter raised an eyebrow at the server. "One. Black. Coffee," he said slowly, dodging a kick from Johnny under the table.

The server got a twitch in his eye, but he smiled under his beard. "Coming right up _sir_ ," he said, turning on his heel and walking, straight-backed, to the counter.

Johnny reached over and punched Peter in the arm. "Why are you _like this_?"

Peter swatted Johnny's hands away. "Why did _you_ bring me here? You know I hate places like this."

"I wanted to watch you turn colours, not get into a fist fight with the waitstaff," Johnny grumbled. "I should make you pay for your own coffee now, jackass."

"I forgot my debit card at home and I only have twenty dollars cash on me, I couldn't afford it," Peter said. He spotted the server across the room and waved. Johnny punched him in the arm again.

Their drinks came, coming in ceramic cups that resembled those baked enamel tin cups for camping. Peter cautiously sipped his coffee, but since his spider-sense didn't go off, he was fairly certain that it hadn't been poisoned or spit in. It was decent coffee, but nowhere near 'decent' enough to justify the price tag.

"So what's new with you?" Johnny asked, scooping up some whipped cream on the end of his (metal) straw and licking it off.

"Oh you know," Peter said, not staring at Johnny's mouth, "the usual."

"Pete, with you? That can mean _anything_ ," Johnny said, pointing at him with his straw. "Come on, there must be at least _one_ interesting thing you've done since we saw each other last."

Peter shrugged. "It's been a slow month I guess," he said. "I mean, there was the new villain I beat up, but honestly it was more pathetic than interesting."

"Tell me about it," Johnny asked.

Peter groaned. "There's really not much to tell. Some jerkoff calling himself 'Ribbon Eel' like that's not the stupidest name ever. Could turn himself flat and squeeze through cracks and stuff. Got into a vault, put a bunch of stuff in a bag, then couldn't get it out again because his dumb suit only turned _him_ flat, not the stuff he carried. Instead of cutting his losses and escaping to try again after he'd figured out his own damn tech, he spent forty-five minutes trying to get that damn bag of loot out."

"Oof," Johnny said. "What a moron."

"When I showed up he started crying," Peter said, staring forlornly into his coffee. "I didn't even punch him."

"You can't win them all," Johnny hummed. "Don't worry, I'm sure you'll get to punch the next one."

"You say the sweetest things Torchie," Peter said, taking a long drink of coffee. "What about you? Anything new?"

Johnny grinned like he'd been waiting for Peter to ask him that. "Weeell," he said coyly. "I shouldn't really be telling anyone this, but I just got signed on for a new modeling contract."

Peter smiled, Johnny's happiness infectious. "That's great Johnny."

Johnny practically glowed. "I was really happy to be approached for this. The modeling work has been a little slow since I came out."

Peter pressed his lips together. "Yeah," he said, wondering what to even say to something like that. He couldn't think of anything and figured it was better to skip it altogether. "What is it? Jeans? Cologne again? A new line of toaster ovens?" he teased.

Johnny rolled his eyes, but his smile didn't drop. "It's a new makeup company that wants to market their products as completely gender neutral."

"Oh," Peter said, brain going blank for a moment. "That's… that's really great Johnny. I'm really happy for you."

Johnny seemed like he was in too good a mood to notice Peter being weird. "They reached out to me as their first choice. This is a really good opportunity for me to start rebranding my image."

 _What was wrong with the old image?_ Peter thought. _The one that didn't make me feel like I just got sucker punched?_ "That's really amazing Johnny. Congratulations."

"Thank you," Johnny said, smiling brightly. "I've been angling to get something like this for a while now. It's a little smaller than some of the brands I've worked with before, but I really like their approach to things. Plus they want me to be _the_ face of their product, which was super flattering," he said. "And their products are actually pretty nice. Very good for the price and a portion of the sales go to LGBT focused charities."

"Not bad," Peter said. He needed to talk about something else. "Hey did I tell you about the new program Aunt May is running at FEAST?"

Johnny didn't appear to have noticed Peter's deft change of subject. They chatted about the charities Peter's aunt and Johnny's sister were involved in for a while, bouncing around between topics until it was time to leave. Johnny slapped a fifty down on the table as they gathered their things to leave.

"Wow, I was joking about it costing more than twenty," Peter said, shouldering his bag.

"It's for the tip, to apologize for you being an _asshole_ ," Johnny huffed. "Let's go before we get banned."

"You actually _want_ to come back here?" Peter asked, probably too loud as the barista shot him a dirty look. "I mean the coffee was _okay_ but—"

Johnny shoved him towards the door, not letting up until they were outside. "Why do you have to do that?" he hissed once they got onto the street.

"To watch you turn colours," Peter teased. "Come on, you're taking me to an art thing right?"

Johnny rolled his eyes and started leading Peter down the street. "I don't know why I bother with you," he said.

"Must be my winning charm," Peter said, falling into step next to him.

The art thing turned out to be a photography show, something Peter honestly did enjoy. He would have been appreciative of Johnny keeping track of what he might like if the show hadn't ended up being completely boring. The show had been billed as a study of queer life in New York City, but it was mostly a bunch of older gay white men in their fancy West Village condos posing against their white, minimalist furniture.

"I thought you said this was going to be fun," Peter complained, eyeing the tray of hors d'oeuvres that whisked by. He'd tried them earlier and had nearly gagged on how dry and tasteless they were.

"I thought it was going to be," Johnny sighed, looking at yet another sixties-something white man posing against an off-grey couch. "The invite made it seem like it was going to be like this big celebration of queer culture."

"I think I've seen maybe one rainbow since we got here," Peter said. He grabbed a little cheese cube from a tray and tried it. He winced as it crumbled like drywall in his mouth. "Wanna ditch and race to the usual place?"

"Absolutely," Johnny said. They started making their way around to the exit when a man stepped in front of them and blocked their path.

"Oh my goodness!" the man squeaked. "I can't believe you actually _came_!"

Johnny put on his best 'I'm a celebrity and strangers approach me all the time' smile. "Hi, nice to meet you."

"Oh my goodness, I can't believe I've been so rude," the man said. "I'm Zekiel, the artist. It's just so _amazing_ to meet you."

"Likewise. I was so happy to get your invitation," Johnny said like he hadn't just been planning to bail. Peter scratched his nose to hide a grin.

"Oh that makes me _so_ happy," Zekiel beamed. "Did you see the portraits over here? They're some of my favourites," he said, reaching an arm around Johnny's back to usher him away, hand pressed to Johnny's spine.

Peter followed them, gaze zeroing in on the hand, half-listening to whatever Zekiel was prattling about. Peter was no expert on how men flirted with other men, but that seemed a little forward. Johnny walked along without resistance, but Peter could trace the line of tension across his shoulders. A moment later he turned slightly and shot Peter a look that clearly spelled out 'save me'. Peter strode forward.

"Hey firefly, did you see this one?" Peter said, too loud for the room. He slid his arm around Johnny's shoulders and tugged him out of Zekiel's grip, pulling him to his side to stand in front of the only photograph that had caught his eye in the whole set. It was another interior shot, but this time it was of two older women, not looking at the camera but smiling at one another, one woman tilting her head to look up into the other's face, looking completely smitten with her partner. The entire room was strung with plants and splattered with colour. A large cat lazed in the windowsill to one side.

Zekiel startled slightly at Peter's intervention, but followed along with them. "Oh, that one? Not my best work I think, but the director was adamant it be included."

"I can see why, it's really good," Peter said. "I like the composition."

"The colours are really nice," Johnny agreed. "It feels really intimate, like a moment frozen in time."

Zekiel blinked, clearly not used to being disagreed with. "Well, I'm glad you like it so much," he said. "I wasn't used to photographing with so much bright colour in the shot, it was difficult to make it look nice."

"Really? I always thought it was easier if the colours were bright," Peter said, snagging a champagne glass from a tray and taking a sip. It was terrible enough that Peter wondered why his spider-sense hadn't warned him. "I mean, so long as you don't overexpose, bright colours usually come out really nice, especially in natural light. Was it foggy that day?"

Zekiel was starting to look a little ruffled. "I'm sorry, have we met?" he asked, barely not glaring at Peter.

"This is Peter Parker, a friend of mine," Johnny said, reaching one hand up to touch Peter's chest lightly. "He's a photographer as well."

"Charmed," Peter drawled with a grin.

"Of course," Zekiel said, looking Peter up and down, sizing him up. "Have I seen any of your work?"

"Well if you've ever read The Bugle, you've probably seen it," Peter said. "I mostly take photos of superheroes."

"Oh, a _photojournalist_ ," Zekiel said, sharpening his teeth on the word. "I should have guessed."

"Peter actually published a book of his work, _Webs_ ," Johnny said. "You might have heard of it, it was a bestseller."

"Oh yes, that Spider-Man book," Zekiel said dismissively. "I never really cared for that one. Always seemed anti-social, if you ask me."

Johnny snorted derisively. "Oh that's all Bugle nonsense," he said. "Spider-Man and I have been friends for years. He's an amazing person."

Zekiel flushed. "Oh, well I heard—"

"Well you heard wrong," Johnny cut him off. "Spider-Man is a _hero_. I trust him with my life."

Zekiel flushed a little deeper and Peter could feel Johnny's temperature start to rise. He figured now was a good time to hit the road. "Hey, didn't we have that thing?" he asked, giving Johnny's shoulder a squeeze.

Johnny looked up at him. "Thing?"

"That thing we wanted to get to after this," Peter said. "We should probably _race_ there if we want to be on time."

"Oh right, _that_ thing," Johnny said, making the connection. He turned back to Zekiel with a bright smile. "Well, it was nice to meet you, but we really need to be going."

"Oh, well before you go, I wanted to talk to you about some modelling—" Zekiel started.

"You'll have to speak to my agent about that," Johnny said, letting Peter pull him away to the closest exit. "He has all the information about my schedule and rates. Just send him an email and we can work out a contract. Some other time!" he called over his shoulder as they disappeared through a side door.

"Wow, what a jackass," Peter said, keeping his arm around Johnny's shoulder as they stepped out into the alleyway.

Johnny huffed. "I'll say. He doesn't even _know_ you."

Peter raised an eyebrow. "I mean, _Webs_ sold well, but it's kind of a niche interest—"

"Not that," Johnny huffed. "I meant about Spider-Man."

"Ah, _that_ ," Peter said. "Well it's nothing new."

Johnny grumbled. "After everything you've done for this city, you'd think people would be more grateful."

"I've heard worse," Peter shrugged. "Anyway, the usual place?"

"Last one there has to buy lunch!" Johnny said, slipping out of Peter's grip and taking off into the sky like a comet.

"Cheater!" Peter called after him, quickly stripping out of his clothes and yanking on his mask. The space under his arm where Johnny had been pressed into his side felt extremely cold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This kind of feels a bit like filler, but I promise next chapter will be better.


	7. Part i.vii: Retrograde

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the reason this got done so fast was because I actually had a good chunk of it written ahead of time, what with all the pacing crap I've been dealing with. The next chapters will probably be out slower since I don't have anything for them written at all. This ended up being a shorter chapter as well, but I don't think I could make it longer without bloating it.
> 
> Trigger warnings for blood, almost-violence, discussions of homophobia.

Peter was out swinging the first time he saw it. It must have gone up quickly, as he was on his way home from a night of beating the crap out of Shocker and it hadn't been there earlier when he'd swung out. For a moment he didn't even register it aside to note the colour, a bright splash of red against the skyline. Then his brain processed the image completely and Peter's head snapped around to get a better look.

The billboard was giant, illuminated by flood lights to be visible at all hours of the night. Johnny's face was the main draw, slightly to one side to make room for some swirly, loopy text Peter didn't bother trying to decipher. Bright oranges, reds, and golds had been painted across his face, a stripe of black liner cutting across his eyelid. Highlight and contour defined his face, making his cheekbones stand out sharply. Johnny's head was tilted back slightly, exposing the long line of his throat, hair in tousled curls like he'd been running his hands through it. His eyes were hooded, a slim hint of cool blue under the warm colours across his face. Johnny's lips had been painted a deep, almost bloody looking dark red, mouth parted slightly and pushed up into a permanent pout.

Peter stared at the billboard, mind blanking out. It felt like he was looking at some kind of optical illusion, his brain trying to make connections that didn't make sense. He couldn't look away, couldn't tear his eyes away from Johnny's bright red, plush lips.

_ They look so soft. _

The singular thought streaked across Peter's brain before his spider-sense drowned it out. He ripped his eyes away from the billboard just in time to take note of the orange brick wall in front of his nose before he slammed right into it. Stunned, Peter dropped his swing and fell, the ground rushing up to meet him. Finally his brain rebooted enough to realize he'd rather not be turned into a spider-shaped smear on the pavement and he shot an arm out, sticking his hand to the very same brick wall he'd slammed into. His arm wrenched painfully and his guts protested the sudden stop. Not having enough time to correct his angle, his knees and shins slammed into the brick first, sending shockwaves through his body hard enough to rattle his teeth.

Peter clung to the wall for a second, breathing hard and gritting his teeth. His face felt wet and he was pretty sure that his nose was bleeding, if not broken, and his knees were screaming at him. He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to figure out what the hell had just happened.

Slowly, knees protesting the entire way, Peter crawled back up the side of the building until he reached the roof. Pulling himself to sit on edge of the railing, Peter pushed his mask up and probed his nose. Bleeding and tender, but not broken at least. That determined, Peter looked back over at the billboard.

It was just as jarring as the first time he'd seen it, but with the adrenaline fading he could finally form coherent thoughts. It was an advertisement for the makeup company Johnny had told him about, the one who'd wanted him to be the 'face' of their products. It was a good photo, the photographer obviously knew what he was doing, catching Johnny at a perfect angle, and of course the makeup artist was obviously good at their job.

Peter didn't really know why he was having such a strong reaction to it. Giant images of his friends and loved ones weren't new to him, MJ had more than one billboard go up with her face done up to be sexy and pouty. There had been one in particular for an underwear company that Peter had changed his swinging route for so he could see it every day on his way home. Johnny had also had billboards and posters and all kinds of things plastered with his face. Somehow this was  _ specifically  _ an issue with Johnny in makeup.

Peter groaned and rubbed his face, heedless of the blood he was probably smearing everywhere. This shouldn't have been happening. There was no reason for him to be having such a strong reaction to Johnny in makeup. Peter considered himself a fair man, someone who judged people based on their actions towards others and not on their personal lifestyle. People were people and it was how they treated other people that truly mattered. He didn't care in the slightest about religion or colour, or who they liked to kiss, so long as no one was getting hurt. His aunt and uncle had raised him to see the person first, and it was something he stuck by, no matter what.

Unless apparently that person was Johnny Storm.

_ Have I secretly been a homophobe this entire time without knowing it? _ Peter thought, pulling on his mask and checking his web shooters. He took one last glance at the billboard before finally swinging off. He'd been on his way home but maybe another swing around the block to clear his head would be good for him.

_ But why is it  _ **_only_ ** _ for Johnny? _ he thought, swinging over a busy street.  _ Shouldn't I have the reaction to other people too? _

_ Maybe it's  _ **_because_ ** _ it's Johnny _ , he thought, landing on a lamppost and leaping over the street.  _ I've never really been close with any gay people the way I know Johnny. _

_ It can't just be that though, can it? _ Peter thought, frowning deeply as he swung.  _ He's been my friend for so long, it would be silly for this to be the thing that comes between us. _

_ I've never had an issue with other people who are gay, it  _ **_can't_ ** _ just be that _ , Peter mused.  _ There has to be something else going on. _

Peter swung higher and higher over the buildings, like he was trying to chase the meager spattering of stars above him. Johnny had been out for months now, and the image of him in lipstick was no longer a new phenomenon. Peter had kept telling himself that he just needed to get used to it, just needed to acclimatize himself to seeing Johnny in makeup and gender-ambiguous clothing, but it had been way too long to justify that as an excuse anymore.

_ And of course there's the whole issue with the men Johnny's been going out with _ , Peter thought bitterly. He'd tried to follow his aunt's advice had keep his judgy nose out of Johnny's love life, but something still unsettled him every time he saw a stranger wrapped around Johnny like a slimy octopus.

He recalled the way Zekiel had crowded into Johnny's space, put a hand on him without even asking.  _ I've  _ **_never_ ** _ liked it when people acted entitled to Johnny's space _ , Peter thought. A dozen or so other incidents came to mind where Johnny had been kissed, touched, groped, or licked (something that had happened  _ twice _ ), most of them involving women. Every time he'd seen or heard about something like that happening, he'd been filled with a white hot rage bubbling up from deep inside. He  _ hated  _ it when people got handsy, no matter what gender they were. It wasn't even exclusive to Johnny, as Peter remembered one time when he'd had to rescue Harry from the clutches of a very drunk girl way back in college.

_ But these aren't stoned sorority girls who aren't taking no for an answer _ , Peter realized.  _ These are grown men that Johnny is consenting to go home with. There's no reason to get so pissed off. _

Peter growled and shook his head, trying to dislodge all of the thoughts chasing themselves in circles around his head. He tried instead to get lost in the movement of his swinging. He felt pent up, all nervous energy and nowhere to direct it. Before he knew it he found himself swinging out into areas he didn't usually go, searching for  _ something  _ to punch.

He was just about to consider heading home when something caught the corner of his eye. Landing on the side of a building, Peter stopped to get a better look. His breath caught in his chest when he realized it was Johnny.

Johnny was dressed up tonight, wearing a tight, sparkly top that ended under his ribs, showing off his toned stomach, and a pair of loose, flowy pants that swished when he moved. Peter couldn't see from where he was in the dark, but he would bet that Johnny was also wearing makeup.

_ I wonder what colour the lipstick is? _ Peter wondered before something else caught his eye.

There was a man with Johnny, walking with him as they stepped out of the club, one hand possessively at the small of Johnny's back. All of a sudden he grabbed Johnny's elbow and pulled him into an alley, moving them quickly. Peter instantly felt his hackles rise and crawled along the wall to follow them.

The alley was dark, and it took Peter a moment to find Johnny again. He crawled along the wall and watched them, squinting through the dark. All of a sudden he saw the man crowd Johnny against the wall, pushing a knee between his thighs and one hand reaching around and squeezing his ass. The other hand grabbed a fistful of golden curls and wrenched Johnny's head back so the man could lunge forward and sink his teeth into his neck. Johnny's yelp echoed through the alley.

Peter's vision went red and before he realized it, he was moving.

Peter landed on the ground directly behind the man, reaching up and grabbing his shoulders. Before the man could react or even turn around, Peter threw him down the alley where he landed in a pile of trash. Peter stalked forward, ignoring Johnny confusedly calling his name. In a moment he was on the man, who was trying to scramble out of the pile of trash, desperate to get away from the six foot pissed off spider bearing down on him. Peter grabbed the man by the front of the shirt and lifted him off the ground, one hand pulling back, curling into a fist so he could knock the man into next week.

"Spider-Man! Stop!"

Peter's spider-sense blared and he jumped, dropping the man like a sack of rocks. He landed on the alley wall just in time to avoid a blast of fire. He looked down to see Johnny poised to go on the attack, fire crawling up his arms and back, and looking  _ extremely  _ pissed off and ready to roast something.

"What the  _ fuck  _ Spider-Man?" Johnny shouted. "What the hell is  _ wrong  _ with you?"

Peter stared at Johnny incredulously. Of all the  _ ungrateful _ — "He was attacking you!" he shouted back, gesturing to the man in the trash pile.

Now Johnny looked equally confused and pissed. "What? No he wasn't!"

Peter growled and dropped from the wall. "Well it sure didn't look like a game of  _ bridge _ . I know  _ I  _ always go down dark, creepy alleys for completely innocent reasons."

Johnny's flames flicked higher. "He was not  _ attacking  _ me!"

"He grabbed your hair and he  _ bit  _ you!" Peter shouted.

Johnny snorted. "Yeah, because I  _ asked  _ him to!"

Peter blinked, stalling up short. "What?" he asked.

Johnny rolled his eyes and crossed his arms. "What, you've never heard of 'liking it rough' before?"

All of a sudden Peter's mind went blank. For a moment his brain was flooded with images of Johnny being pinned down, getting manhandled and bitten and  _ fucked _ . It took Peter a moment to shove the images away, stomping them down and locking them into a box never to be looked at again.

Johnny's lipstick was pink today, matching the blush and coral colours of his outfit.

Peter realized he was being waited on for a response, Johnny still staring at him with literal fire in his eyes. Peter shook himself out of his stupor and let his indignation creep back in. "Well it sure as hell  _ looked  _ like you were in trouble. Excuse  _ me  _ for trying to help."

Johnny groaned, flames starting to flicker out. Johnny burned hot but never for very long. "Spidey, you're a real dumbass sometimes, you know that?"

Peter huffed. "So what, I'm just supposed to  _ ignore  _ you when it looks like you're in trouble? If I did that, you'd  _ still  _ be talking to that boring photographer."

Johnny stared at Peter incredulously. "What the  _ hell  _ does that have to do with anything?"

Peter recalled the way Zekiel's hand had creeped up Johnny's spine. The bite mark on the side of Johnny's neck was an angry red. Peter's stomach burned.

"So it's fine when I step in to save you from a weird photographer, but when it looks like you're being  _ assaulted  _ in a back alley I'm supposed to back off?" Peter shouted, throwing up his arms. "Yeah,  _ that  _ makes sense!"

"I was not being  _ assaulted _ !" Johnny shouted back. "And I  _ asked _ you for help with the photographer! It's a completely different situation!"

"Well  _ pardon me _ for taking some initiative!" Peter shouted. All of the yelling was making his nose hurt again.

"I am  _ fine _ ," Johnny hissed. "God it's like you're  _ trying  _ to piss me off."

"I was  _ trying  _ to protect you!" Peter hollered, throwing his hands up.

Peter's spider-sense blared suddenly as Johnny flared up like a miniature sun, sending Peter scrambling backwards a few paces. Johnny burned hot and bright, making pools of water hiss and garbage bags squeal. The dumpster next to Johnny started to slouch.

"Do I  _ look  _ like I need your protection!?" Johnny snarled. "I can take care of myself! If a guy gets rough with me, it's  _ because I let him _ !"

Peter was starting to sweat from the heat Johnny was putting out. While he was reasonably sure Johnny wouldn't  _ actually  _ roast him, he wouldn't put money on him not singing Peter a little. Johnny didn't like to hurt people, but he could get pissed enough to toss Peter around a bit.

"Uh, if I can interject," a voice called out. It was the man whose block Peter had nearly knocked off. He was now standing several feet away, out of the range of the heat. "I'm not sure how much it matters, but uh, I'm kind of on Spider-Man's side here."

Peter blinked. Well  _ that  _ was unexpected.

Johnny didn't look impressed. "Seriously Henry?" he snapped.

'Henry' fidgeted. "Well, from an outsider perspective, you have to admit it must have looked kinda bad," he said. "If I saw something like that, I probably would have stopped to ask questions."

It was hard to see through the flames, but Johnny looked like he was getting a twitch in his eye. "I can't believe this," he grumbled. "You know what? To hell with both of you, I'm going home," he said.

Johnny flew into the air, pausing once to turn back to glare at Peter. "Whenever you get your _ head out of your ass _ , let me know!" he shouted, then streaked off like a comet.

Peter watched Johnny go until he disappeared around a skyscraper. The alley around him still hissed and sizzled with heat. Peter's vision was slightly spotty from the bright light of Johnny's flame. With a sigh that turned into a groan, he dropped his head into his hands and fought down the urge to slam it into the brick wall until whatever was wrong with him leaked out of his ears. On the backs of his eyelids he could trace the trail in the sky Johnny had left as he's flown away.

"You okay man?" Henry asked, cautiously making his way forward.

"Fine," Peter snapped. "Just… fine."

"O-kay," Henry said, fidgeting a little. "Well uh, I think I'm just gonna go."

"Wait," Peter said before he could disappear back onto the street. "Did Johnny… did he really ask you to rough him up like that?"

Henry gave him an odd look. "Uh, yeah? I never would have done that if he hadn't."

_ Oh great, he's nice _ , Peter thought, feeling like a heel. "Right. Sorry for almost… you know," he finished lamely, waving a hand.

Henry smiled. "It's cool man, you were just trying to be a good friend. Johnny's lucky to have people like you looking after him."

_ Fuck you _ , Peter thought. "Thanks," he said.

Henry gave him one last smile before exiting the alley and heading back into the club. Peter sighed and slumped against the wall. Maybe throwing himself off the Chrysler building would shake some sense into him. At the very least it might make him feel better.

* * *

Johnny was still fuming by the time he reached the Baxter building. Where the hell did Peter get off trying to protect him? He was the Human Torch! A quarter of the Fantastic Four! He could hold his own against Doctor Doom, he was  _ more  _ than capable of defending himself against any random guy if they tried to get fresh. He didn't know what Peter's problem was lately, but he was getting sick of it.

Flying in through the window, Johnny flamed off as he landed, but he could still feel the flames licking up his neck. He stomped through the living room, only noticing that it was occupied at the last moment.

"You're in a mood," Sue remarked, sitting up on the couch, a mug of tea and a book beside her on the end table. She looked a little bleary, like she'd been dozing in the living room waiting up for Reed to come out of the lab.

Or for Johnny to get home.

"Yeah well, Spider-Man decided to drop in and be an  _ asshole _ ," Johnny growled, crossing his arms.

Sue got that look on her face like she'd gotten when she used to indulge his teenage drama. "What did Spider-Man do?" she asked.

Johnny huffed and paced around the room, giving his sister a basic rundown of events. He had to go back and explain what had happened with Zekiel and the art show, which made her raise her eyebrows, but Sue listened patiently as Johnny told her what happened. All the while, puffs of smoke curled up from Johnny's hair and shoulders, which he thought was very demonstrative of his current mood.

"I mean, can you  _ believe  _ it?" Johnny hissed. "Trying to  _ protect  _ me? Who the  _ hell  _ does he think he is?"

"Well," Sue hummed, "from an outsider's perspective—"

"Ugh!" Johnny groaned, flopping down on the couch next to her. "He's been so  _ weird  _ since I came out. He thinks he's been hiding it, but I can tell he's uncomfortable about something."

Johnny hadn't noticed it at first, he hadn't  _ wanted  _ to notice it, but it was obvious that Peter had started acting weirdly around him whenever certain things came up. Peter didn't like talking about Johnny's sex life, despite the fact that Peter wasn't shy about his own, and he'd never been shy about Johnny's until after he'd come out as gay. There was also the way he kept staring at him whenever Johnny wore makeup in front of him. He'd stop for a half second, like he was shocked to see Johnny in makeup, even though it had been ages since Johnny had started painting his face. When they hung out, Johnny would catch glimpses of Peter staring at his mouth if he was wearing lipstick, especially a dark colour. A million little things that all added up to  _ something  _ that Johnny couldn't figure out.

Sue raised an eyebrow. "You think he has an issue with you being gay?"

Johnny sighed, throwing an arm over his eyes. "No, I don't think it's that," he said. "At least, I don't  _ want  _ to think it's that. He was cool when I told him I was in love with him for so long, and he's been nothing but supportive. It's just… we can talk for hours about what it was like for me to be in the closet, and how great it is to be out now, but the minute I start talking about being with other guys, he gets all cagey. It's like he's fine with the  _ idea  _ of me being gay, but being confronted with the actual reality makes him squeamish."

Sue let out a hum. They sat in silence for a moment and Johnny's anger began to simmer down. He let out a sigh. "I just want to know what's going on with him. He's my friend, I'd hate to lose him over…" he trailed off, not wanting to even consider it.

Johnny thought back on all the years he and Peter had known each other. Peter had been Johnny's first real friend in life. Before he'd been the Human Torch, Johnny hadn't had any friends to speak of, and after he'd crash landed into fame and superpowers, he'd only had 'friends' who wanted to get close to the Human Torch, they couldn't have given less of a shit about Johnny Storm. Of course he'd had Ben and the FF, but that was family, and all of them had been so much older than he was. Peter—Spider-Man—had been his first real friend, even if they hadn't known it in the beginning. They'd bandied insults back and forth and competed with one another, goding each other into stupider stunts, to reach higher, to be  _ better _ . Peter had been there for him through so much, Johnny didn't know what he would do without him.

Sue stayed quiet for a moment. "Do you think maybe he is just worried about you?" she asked.

Johnny cracked an eye open and looked up at her. "What do you mean?" he asked.

She let out a sigh. "Johnny, you know I love you, and I'm so incredibly happy for you to be out and being true to yourself," she said, looking down at him with deep concern in her eyes, "but this is the first night in  _ two weeks  _ you've been home earlier than midnight. You've been parading around for the media, practically  _ inviting  _ people to be nasty to you. I'm not saying you shouldn't be going out, or you shouldn't wear whatever you want, but… I  _ worry  _ sometimes, that you're running headfirst into something just because you  _ can  _ now. I  _ know  _ you, and sometimes it feels like you're doing all this to—I don't know— _ prove  _ something to someone, to yourself maybe."

Johnny swallowed. He folded his hands on his chest and glanced away, considering his sister's words. He let out a sigh and sat up, settling next to her. They sat in silence for a while as Johnny tried to find the right way to respond. "You aren't… wrong," he said.

Sue looked over at him as he continued. "Before I came out, I was so scared of being  _ found _ out. I lived every day terrified that I was going to slip up, give myself away. Some days I wanted so badly for it to just… go away. It would have been so much easier for me to just be what everyone wanted me to be. Maybe then I wouldn't  _ hate  _ myself so much."

Sue sucked in a deep breath. She reached out and pulled Johnny close, tucking his head to her shoulder and running her hand through his hair, nails scraping gently against his scalp. Johnny sighed and relaxed into it, closing his eyes. He remembered all the nights she'd done this when he was a child, upset from yet another difficult day at school. Caroline Walters had made fun of his thrift store clothing, Bernard Harris had pushed him into a locker, Mr. Vanderbaek had sneered at him during gym class when he couldn't keep up with the other boys. Johnny took a deep breath.

"When I came out, it was like… it was like everything I had ever cut myself off from had suddenly opened up for me," he said. "I could actually  _ have  _ all the things I'd never let myself want. Wearing clothing I get to have fun with, meeting people I'm actually attracted to, having sex that I actually get to  _ enjoy _ ."

Sue's hand stilled at that, but Johnny pressed on. "I guess I went a little crazy," he said. "I just… it's been so hard. I've been living a lie for so long, I just… I just wanted to live for  _ me  _ for once, and fuck what anyone else thinks. Don't I… don't I deserve that?"

"Yes," Sue said, and Johnny could tell she was holding back tears. "Yes you deserve to do all of that. I know… I know it must have been so  _ hard  _ for you all these years. I think back on it and… I just wish I'd  _ noticed _ . I  _ hate  _ that you spent all that time thinking you had to be a certain way in order to protect yourself. I'm your sister, I should have been the one protecting you."

"That's not your fault," Johnny said softly. "I didn't tell you. You did your best."

"I should have done  _ better _ ," Sue said, pressing her cheek to the top of his head. "You said you were afraid to come out, I should have done more to show you there was no reason to be afraid. That I love you and I'd move hell and earth and heaven for you no matter what. I think about what you went through and it  _ kills _ me to think that you didn't know that. I feel… I feel like I  _ failed  _ somehow."

"You didn't fail," Johnny said quickly, turning so he could wrap his arms around Sue, pulling his sister into a tight hug. "You've done a better job than anyone would have expected you to. You're the best sister I ever could have asked for. You're the best mom I've ever known."

Sue let out a watery laugh, curling her arms around Johnny and clinging to him tightly. Johnny could feel her tears soaking into his shoulder and felt his own eyes begin to sting. "I never once doubted you'd love me no matter what Sue. I knew all along that if I came out— _ when  _ I came out—you'd be my first line of defense. There was never any doubt in my mind that you'd be there for me. So  _ please  _ don't feel like you failed me, like you didn't do enough to show me you loved me no matter what. I knew Sue, I  _ know _ ."

Sue sniffled loudly and Johnny felt the tears rolling down his cheeks. They held each other tightly for a while, both of them crying and sniffling in the quiet of the dark living room. Johnny had never liked seeing his sister cry; she'd always been so stoic when he was younger, putting on a brave face while she tried to navigate having to raise her younger brother while also growing up herself. It hadn't been until later, until after Reed had entered their lives like a cosmic whirlwind, that Johnny had realized she hadn't smiled much either.

After a few minutes Sue pulled back and patted her face to try and dry it. "Sorry, I didn't mean to make this about me," she said. "You're the one who actually has to deal with being gay."

"I mean, you have to deal with me being gay too," Johnny said. "It's not quite the same, but it's still something that affects you."

Sue gave him a watery smile, then her face went serious again. "Johnny, can I ask you something?"

"Of course," Johnny said.

Sue fidgeted for a moment. "You said you didn't doubt that I would still love you after you came out. Can I assume you felt the same about Reed and Ben?"

Johnny raised an eyebrow, wondering where this was going. "Reed's never cared about anyone's sexuality. I always figured he'd barely notice the difference," he said, smiling when Sue snorted. "Ben… he can be a little old fashioned at times, but I love him, and I know he loves me. I never doubted that he'd stick by me if push came to shove."

Sue nodded. "Of course. We all love you so much, we'd never turn our backs on you," she said, reaching out to put a hand over his. She gave it a squeeze and bit her lip. "It's just… if you knew that, can I ask why it took so long for you to come out?"

Johnny took a deep breath, thinking about all the years he'd stayed in the closet, all the years he'd wasted trying to be something he wasn't. "I… when I was younger, I kept it hidden because I knew… there were certain expectations of me, of the person I needed to be in order to keep us in the public eye."

"Johnny," Sue said softly. "We'd never ask you to do that for us."

"You didn't have to," Johnny said. "I… I understood what it meant for us to be famous, I knew how important it was. You and Reed never had to say it, but I knew."

Sue let out a long sigh. "Yeah," she said softly.

Johnny squeezed Sue's hand. He'd had to hide the fact that he was gay to keep the general public tolerant of them, but Sue hadn't gone unscathed in that fight either. Back when they'd just been starting out, they'd all had to sculpt themselves into something palatable for the media. Most people  _ still  _ liked to assume that Sue was a happy stay-at-home-mom and wife who just happened to have super powers. The reality was that was just as much of a carefully crafted image as Johnny's had been. They didn't realize that Sue was more their leader than Reed had ever been, that she'd always been more involved in sports than she'd ever been interesting modeling, that out of all of them,  _ she  _ was the most dangerous. Susan Storm was far from the demure, sweet little wife the media liked to make her out to be, but she'd had to swallow her wicked tongue and let people paint her the way they wanted to see her.

"I spent a long time pushing it down," Johnny continued, "and after a while I just kind of…  _ forgot _ about it. It wasn't until the Negative Zone that I realized it again."

Sue nodded. "But… all those women you dated. Dorrie, Crystal, Frankie Rae? You were  _ married  _ to a woman, wasn't it—didn't it feel wrong?"

Johnny closed his eyes, trying unsuccessfully not to remember all of the relationships he'd been in that had broken down over the years. "It felt… empty," he settled on.

"Empty," Sue repeated.

" _ Empty _ . I dated them because I knew I should  _ want  _ to date them," Johnny explained. "I felt like I was in love with them because I knew I  _ should  _ be in love with them. And of course I  _ loved  _ them, cared about them, but it felt…  _ incomplete _ . Everyone always talks about how it's supposed to feel when you're with someone you love, and I never felt like that. I felt more like I was going through the motions of being in a relationship, checking boxes off of all the things I knew I was  _ supposed  _ to do."

Sue squeezed his hand. "And now?"

Johnny took a deep breath. "Well, I haven't really  _ dated  _ anyone yet, but… it's just  _ so  _ different. Even just  _ talking  _ to other gay men is different. I feel attractive and  _ sexy  _ when a man shows interest in me. I finally get what the hell people keep talking about when they talk about sexual attraction. It's… it's  _ good _ ."

Sue smiled at him. "Good," she said. "Good, I'm glad. I want you to be happy Johnny, that's all I've ever wanted. I'm sorry you had to spend such a long time feeling that way."

Johnny shook his head. "You don't have to be sorry," he said. "I did this to myself really."

"Still," Sue chuckled, giving his hand another squeeze. "I love you Johnny."

Johnny smiled, filling with a warmth that had nothing to do with his flames. "I love you too Sue," he said. He pulled her into another tight hug. "I'll try to calm down a little with all the crazy outfits and going out every night."

"You do what you need to," Sue told him, stroking a hand up his spine. "If you're having fun, if you're happy, that's all I could ask for."

Johnny squeezed her once, inhaling deeply. Sue didn't care for scents, never had, and it didn't make sense for someone who turned invisible to smell strongly of anything, so all he could smell was her, his sister, the only person he'd had for the first half of his life. He'd do anything for his family, and he knew they do anything for him in kind.

"Alright," he breathed, pulling away and getting up. "I'm going to go take a shower and then get some sleep. It's been a while since I slept in my own bed."

"Okay, goodnight," Sue said, settling back down on the couch. "Reed should remember that it's supposed to be date night soon, so I'll stay up a bit longer."

"Oof," Johnny groaned. "Don't go too hard on him. We need him to pay the bills."

Sue chuckled. "Oh he'll make it up to me, one way or another," she said, something sly in her eyes.

"And I'm leaving," Johnny said, starting to walk out of the living room. He stopped and turned around, taking out his earrings. "These are yours, I borrowed them without asking. Sorry," he said, holding them out for her to take.

Sue looked down at the earrings in his hand and then smiled at him. "You keep them honey, they suit you better."

Johnny blinked, then smiled. He leaned over and kissed the top of her head. "Thanks sis."

"You're welcome," she said. "Get some sleep."

Johnny flashed her one last soft smile before heading to his rooms. Despite heading to bed alone, Johnny couldn't help but feel satisfied by how the night had gone.

_ Well _ , he thought, smile fading slightly,  _ except for whatever was going on with Peter. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They're both so dumb.


	8. Part I.viii: Eclipse

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again! I had this done a few days ago but I needed to wait for a friend to do some translations lmao. I'm really excited about this chapter because I think I'm going to mark this as the official end of Part I. I had a lot of fun writing this and I'm super excited to write the next chapter.
> 
> French translations at the end of the chapter. Extra special thanks to my friend for helping with the translations! It's all québécois French, and it was super fun since I live in Montreal where Jean-Paul is from, so I got to write from my own experience of listening to my Frenglish friends switch back and forth between languages.
> 
> Also we're seriously ignoring the timeline for Marvel, especially when it comes to the X-Men. We're just going to assume Bobby coming out happened like a year or so prior to the events of the fic.
> 
> Content warnings for possible homophobia, a guy being a grabby creep, and Frenglish.

Peter didn't hear from Johnny for over two weeks. Even when Peter tried to text him to apologize, Johnny left him on read. Peter knew how to take a hint, but he could feel the whole situation rotting in the back of his mind. He knew he'd acted like an asshole for no reason, but he didn't know what to do to make it better.

Seventeen days after their tiff, Johnny lit up the sky.  _ Meet me at the Usual Place, Jerk _ . The 'jerk' was tacked on a moment after the rest, letting Peter know that Johnny was still pissed at him. Tomorrow the media would speculate on why Spider-Man was in the doghouse, but that was a problem for tomorrow. Peter suited up and swung out.

Johnny was waiting for him when he got there. "Sorry I'm late, I made a stop," Peter said, holding out a pizza box.

Johnny looked down at the box and then back up at Peter, unimpressed. Peter sighed and threw back his head. "Look, I  _ know  _ I'm an asshole," he groaned. "I shouldn't have tried to punch your date in the face. You can take care of yourself and I need to respect your boundaries. I'm sorry."

Johnny raised an eyebrow. "Is that all?" he asked.

Peter grumbled and gestured to the pizza box. "I brought you a whole pie! Pineapple and banana peppers, the one you always order when you want to humiliate me. I even went into the most crowded parlor I could find and made sure everyone heard my order. I think someone tried to stab me as I walked out."

Johnny didn't even crack a smile. Peter really was in the doghouse. He sighed deeply. "Look Johnny, I know… I know it's been a little weird since you came out."

That seemed to be the right train of conversation, as Johnny quirked his brow slightly. Peter kept going. "I've been trying to get used to it, but I admit I haven't been doing great on that front," he admitted.

The benefit of having spent seventeen days stewing was that Peter had taken some time to sit down and  _ think  _ about why he'd been having such strong reactions to Johnny. He'd made some startling and frankly a little upsetting realizations about himself, but it had been good to actually understand why he was being such a jerk. He just hoped Johnny wouldn't fry him until he could explain.

"Johnny… these guys you're hanging around… I don't like them," Peter admitted.

Johnny scoffed but Peter pressed on. "I know that's not my place, but I can't help it!" he insisted. "I see some guy slobbering over you and I just get annoyed. I do the same thing with my female friends."

"So you think of me as a woman now that I'm out?" Johnny asked.

Peter scrubbed the back of his neck, feeling a little guilty already. "Maybe a little?"

"Wow," Johnny snorted. "That's really shitty, even for you."

"I  _ know _ ," Peter groaned. "I think it might be the makeup? My brain just sees lipstick and makes weird connections."

Johnny didn't look appeased, and the temperature around Peter was starting to rise. "Look, I  _ know  _ it's bad and I've got a lot of weird internalized assumptions I need to work on, but you're still my friend Johnny," Peter insisted. "I've only ever wanted what's best for you, and honestly? I don't think any of these guys are it."

"That is  _ so  _ not your decision to make," Johnny huffed.

"I know, I know, but… Johnny, I've seen you get your heart broken before," Peter said. "All these guys? I don't like them, and I don't like that they hurt you."

"He  _ wasn't  _ hurting me!" Johnny insisted, throwing up his hands.

"It  _ looked  _ like he was hurting you!" Peter shot back. He growled in frustration. "Look, I'm sorry I'm a jerk, but I just hate seeing you with all these guys who I don't think are good for you. They're all—" he waved his hand around as though trying to snatch the words out of the air. A bunch of non-committal club guys just looking to party? Fanboys wanting to say they slept with the Human Torch? Just a bunch of random people not worthy of Johnny's time? "— _ bad  _ for you."

Johnny scoffed. "I don't need your  _ approval  _ Pete. If I want to have a bunch of casual sex, that's not your business," he snapped, turning away from Peter and crossing his arms petulantly. He stared out over the bay and finally sighed. "But… you may have a point."

Peter raised an eyebrow under his mask as Johnny continued. "Look, I'm not saying you're  _ right _ , or not still an  _ asshole _ , but… I talked to my sister after I got home that night. I thought about everything I've been doing since I came out and… I'll admit I may have gone a bit overboard with all the guys I kept going home with. I went a little crazy."

"Yeah?" Peter asked.

Johnny let out another long sigh. "I just… I've finally been able to actually  _ enjoy  _ my own sex life. Is it so wrong that I wanted to have it all?"

Peter remembered what his aunt had said. "Well, it's understandable I guess," he said. "And I mean like, casual sex is fine, you're an adult, but it's never seemed like your scene before. I just got a little worried."

"I know," Johnny said. He glanced over at Peter and glared a little. "Don't let this go to your head though. You still owe me like, five more humiliation pizzas,  _ and  _ you need to get your head out of your ass."

Peter couldn't help but grin under his mask. If Johnny was talking about future humiliation pizzas, Peter wasn't banned as his friend yet. "I'm going to try and work on it. I really am sorry for how I've been acting."

"Yeah well, I'm used to you being an asshole I guess," Johnny said with a resigned sigh. He finally reached for the pizza box and sat down with a slice of pizza.

Peter settled down next to him. "I really am sorry Johnny, I didn't even realize I had this problem until now. I don't really have any other gay friends." He dug out a slice of pizza and started pulling off the pineapples.

Johnny flicked a pepper at him. "You really need to work on it, you dumb homophobe," he said.

Peter snorted. "Yeah yeah, I get it, I'm a terrible friend," he said. "But I didn't actually mean to be a bad friend this time."

"I know," Johnny said. "And… there probably  _ were  _ a few guys I probably should have thought twice about going home with."

Peter felt a flare of heat in his gut. "Do I need to kick anyone's ass?"

Johnny waved a hand. "I handled it fine on my own. We only needed to get the lawyers involved once."

"What happened?" Peter asked.

"A guy tried to publish a shitty cellphone pic he'd taken of me while we were having sex," Johnny huffed. "Shut it down before anything could go to the media. Ben just about broke the poor guys arm to get him to erase the photo."

"Only just?" Peter growled. The  _ nerve  _ of some people.

"Simmer down, it's all taken care of," Johnny said. "Besides, I don't think I'll be having a lot of casual sex from now on."

Peter raised an eyebrow. "Oh? Why not?"

Johnny looked over at Peter, a soft smile spreading across his face, eyes shining like stars. "I've got a  _ date _ . I think it might actually get serious."

Peter felt like he'd just been sucker punched in the gut. "Oh?" he asked, forcing himself to smile. "Who's the guy? Anyone I know?"

"Yeah actually," Johnny said. "It's Bobby Drake."

* * *

_ A week earlier _

The nice thing about New York was that it seemed to be a hub for superheroes, and no matter what kind of trouble happened there was always someone around to help. The argument could probably be made that all the superheroes actually  _ attracted  _ all the trouble, but Johnny didn't really care right at the moment. Not when there was a giant robot on the loose and the Fantastic Four, The Avengers,  _ and  _ the X-Men were all on the scene helping to take it down.

It was also nice to have more hands on deck when it came to the clean up as well, as it was easier to slack off. The fight had dragged a little, and Johnny was feeling a bit rough around the edges. He stood next to a giant crater, watching all of the heavy lifters clear out the scattered robot parts, trying to catch his breath.

Johnny heard them before he saw them, two voices whispering excitedly to one another. He glanced around until he noticed two younger heroes standing a ways away, talking to each other and looking like they were trying to get the other to approach him first. After a moment, Johnny recognized them as two of the Young Avengers, Wiccan and Hulkling. He smiled and gave them a wave, chuckling when they flushed. A moment later, the smaller one—Wiccan—walked over to him, Hulkling following behind, simultaneously hiding behind and pushing his friend forward.

"Hi," Johnny greeted when they reached him. "Saw you guys out there. Good work."

Wiccan squeaked. "Thanks," he said. "I mean like,  _ you  _ were really good out there. As well. You were good out there  _ as well _ ," he babbled.

"Thank you," Johnny said, smiling cheerfully at them. Oh to be young and bright eyed again. "You guys are on a team with Cassie, right? Giant Girl?"

Wiccan nodded. "Yeah, she's our friend."

"You know she used to babysit for my nephew?" Johnny asked. Their eyes went wide and Johnny chuckled. "Yeah I knew her when she was just little. Tell her I said hi?"

"Of course!" Billy said. He flushed, embarrassed by his exuberance. He shuffled awkwardly until Hulkling gave him a nudge. "Um, we just wanted to say that… we think it's really cool that you came out as gay."

Johnny suddenly remembered that Wiccan and Hulkling—Billy and Teddy—were dating. It had been a talking point a while back, something Johnny had taken note of and then filed away. He smiled down at them. "Thank you."

"It's really inspiring," Hulkling—Teddy—piped up. He flushed a little but pressed on. "Like, there weren't a lot of gay superheroes when we were growing up, so there wasn't really anyone we had to look up to."

"And you're one of the  _ originals _ ," Wiccan—Billy—said. "You're the  _ Human Torch  _ of the  _ Fantastic Four _ , one of the first big name superhero teams. You've been doing this since you were  _ our  _ age. It's… it just feels really  _ important _ , you know?"

Johnny felt his chest fill with warmth. "Well, if we're being honest, you guys are the ones who are inspiring."

Their eyes went wide. "What, really?" Billy asked.

"Of course," Johnny said. "It took me  _ forever  _ to come out, I'm going to be thirty in a few years and I only got the courage to come out  _ now _ . You guys aren't even twenty yet and you're already confident about who you are. I wish I had been that brave when I was your age."

Billy and Teddy both went red, but got matching wide, beaming smiles. Johnny noticed that Teddy was clutching a phone in one hand. "You guys want a picture?" he asked, chuckling when they excitedly agreed.

Johnny took a bunch of pictures with the two of them, then signed a couple autographs. They finally wandered back to the other Young Avengers, talking excitedly and scrolling through the pictures on their phones. Johnny smiled as he watched them go, feeling the warmth settle in his chest. He'd had fans since he was a teenager, people who admired him for his powers and his heroics, but there was something about being looked up to as a person that made his chest feel like it was about to burst from joy.

"Hey, Johnny Storm, right?" someone said from behind him.

Johnny turned and saw a man with a black star tattoo around his eye. "That's me. You're Shatterstar, right?"

"I am," Shatterstar said, smiling and holding out his hand for Johnny to take. "I think we've met in passing once or twice. I just wanted to congratulate you on coming out recently."

"Thanks," Johnny said, smiling and shaking Shatterstar's hand. "It's been quite the ride."

"I can imagine. It was strange enough for me, and I'm not even famous like you," Shatterstar said. He didn't let go of Johnny's hand right away, his thumb stroking along the back of Johnny's hand.

At that moment, a brown haired man appeared at Shatterstar's side, sliding a possessive arm around his waist. "Hey Star, ready to get going?" he asked.

Shatterstar smiled at the man. "Julio, have you met Johnny?" he asked, either completely oblivious or entirely deliberate.

"We've met once or twice maybe," Julio said, glancing Johnny up and down. Johnny smiled pleasantly and leaned back, trying to come off as non-threatening and non-boyfriend-stealing.

"Johnny just came out of the closet recently, isn't it great?" Shatterstar said.

"It  _ was  _ all over the news," Juilo said.

"It's always nice to have more people in the community," Statterstar said.

"Community?" Johnny asked.

"The queer superhero community," a new, accented voice said. Johnny turned to see another man approaching them. He had black, windswept hair and distinctive pointed ears. "We're not a big group, but we're growing all the time."

"Northstar," Johnny said. "Nice to see you."

"Likewise, and félicitations pour ton coming out," Jean-Paul said.

"Thanks, it's been something else," Johnny said. "Some days I can't even believe I took so long to come out."

"It's certainly different," Julio agreed, relaxing a little now that there was another person around to act as a buffer. He tugged on Shatterstar's arm, pulling him away. "Come on, I'm hungry, let's get lunch."

"Why don't we invite Johnny?" Shatterstar suggested, but Julio was already dragging him away. Johnny watched them go and wondered if he should be concerned.

"Laisse faire about those two, they do this all the time," Jean-Paul said. "I think it's some kind of game they like to play. I've never really wanted to find out."

"Weird," Johnny said. "Possibly a little unhealthy?"

Jean-Paul shrugged. "J'men câlisse. They can have their weird kinky games. I'm married."

Johnny snorted. "Living the dream," he said. "Is it different? Being married to a man?"

Jean-Paul raised an eyebrow. "Comment esque j'srais? I've never been married to a woman."

"Right," Johnny said, a little embarrassed. "Sorry, I'm still new to everything, I forget not everyone started out like me."

"S'correcte," Jean-Paul said, waving a hand. "I sometimes forget not everyone has the same experience as me either. You were married to a woman, yeah?"

"Something like that," Johnny said quietly. "But yeah, you were one of the first ones to come out, weren't you? Way back when I was still a kid."

"I was a kid too," Jean-Paul said, smiling. "Pi ouin, I was never really  _ in  _ the closet, pas vraiment. Then again, I've always had ‘j'men câlisse’ disease. I just didn't care about what anyone thought."

"And I supposed Canada is a little more tolerant than the US," Johnny said.

"Fais-toi pas à croire, Canada has its fair share of hatefulness," Jean-Paul said. "There's always going to be des estis d'caves no matter where you go."

"True enough," Johnny said, recalling the several death threats he'd received in his fan mail since coming out. One person had even tried to mail a bomb, but it had been stopped at the first post office. "Some people just have too much free time."

Jean-Paul laughed. "Pas sérieux," he said. "Anyway, I think Iceman was looking for you as well."

"Bobby?" Johnny asked. He'd seen Bobby around in the fight, but only in passing and only for a moment. Johnny wondered what Bobby could want with him.

Jean-Paul raised an eyebrow at him and gave him a knowing grin. "He's around here somewhere. You should talk to him. J'pense qu'vous allez ben vous entendre. Vous seriez cute ensemble."

"What?" Johnny asked, not understanding the last part.

Jean-Paul waved him off. "Nevermind, I forget when I switch sometimes," he said. "Anyway, I think he was over there somewhere," he gestured to where some other X-Men were gathered. "I'm going to call my husband. Bonne chance!" he said, then sped off, leaving Johnny wondering what he'd been talking about.

Left with nothing else to do, Johnny wandered over to where the X-Men were milling around. Kitty Pryde noticed him walking over and reached over to nudge Bobby, saying something to make him look up. Bobby looked over at Johnny and broke into a wide grin, which Johnny couldn't help but return. Bobby practically ran over and Johnny couldn't even say hello before he was scooped up into an embrace.

"Oh my God!" Bobby cried out. "You're gay!"

Johnny laughed and threw his arms around Bobby's neck. "I know!"

"That's so amazing! Congratulations!" Bobby said, setting Johnny down but keeping his arms around him. "I'm so excited for you!"

"Thanks!" Johnny said. "I tried to call you months ago to tell you in person. You never answered."

"Time travel weirdness," Bobby explained. "Something something alternate timeline blah blah blah oh hey it's Cable," he said. "I got back and I saw your messages and the papers, but I wanted to see you in person. Sorry it took so long, you know how it can be."

"One crazy adventure after another," Johnny said. He noticed how close they were and flushed a little, but he couldn't stop smiling.

Bobby seemed to notice at the same time and coughed. He unwound his arms from around Johnny and pulled back slightly, but kept his hands at Johnny's waist. His fingers felt cold even through Johnny's uniform, but Johnny couldn't seem to bring himself to mind.

Bobby's smile went soft and there was something in his eyes Johnny couldn't put a name on. "I'm really happy for you Johnny."

Johnny smiled brightly. "Thanks Bobby, that means a lot," he said. His heart tripped in his chest a little.

A moment passed and Bobby brightened up again. "We should hang out!" he suggested.

"We should!" Johnny agreed. "I don't have any other gay friends. This'll be exciting."

"I tried hanging out with Julio and Star once," Bobby said. "I felt like such a third wheel."

Johnny snorted. "Well, that's your own fault, hanging out with a couple," he said. He slung an arm around Bobby's shoulders and gave him a pat on the back. "We can just be two single guys, hanging out."

"Two single  _ gays  _ hanging out," Bobby corrected, causing Johnny to laugh. "I'm free tonight, if you don't have anything else you're doing."

Johnny shook his head. "I don't have any plans," he said.

"Great!" Bobby said. He finally stepped away. "I have to get back to the school and finish a class, but I'll come by the Baxter building later?"

"Sure," Johnny said. "Around eight?"

"Eight it is! See you then!" Bobby said, turning to ice and sliding off.

Johnny smiled as he watched Bobby go, something fluttering around in his chest making him inexplicably giddy. He turned and noticed Northstar smiling at him knowingly. He flashed him a thumbs up and then sped off with the rest of the X-Men.

By the time eight was close to rolling around, Johnny had worked himself into a state and was tossing his clothes out of his closet.

"Why does nothing look right?" Johnny growled in frustration, tossing another shirt onto the growing pile.

"Wow, I don't think I've seen you get this worked up about a date since you were twenty," Sue said, leaning against the doorframe.

"It's not a date," Johnny grumbled. He held up a sparkly button-up against his chest and considered it in the mirror, then tossed it onto the bed with the rest.

"Sure," Sue said, rolling her eyes. She pushed off the door frame and started sorting through the pile of discarded clothes. "I'm surprised it took you this long to get in touch with Bobby."

"He's been away. Time travel or something," Johnny said. "I tried to call him when I first came out."

Sue hummed. "Well you're certainly going to have a lot to talk about. You've got a lot in common," she said. She held up a top that was made almost entirely of mesh and sequins. "Are you trying to go casual or dressed-up?"

"Casually dressed up," Johnny said. "Like, 'I totally didn't put effort into how amazing I look, I just wear this every day'."

"Right," Sue said, putting down the top. She picked up a loose, shell-pink cropped hoodie and considered it for a moment, then set it aside. "What about the blue top?"

"Which blue top?" Johnny asked.

"Hold on," Sue said, digging through the pile for a moment before going to sort through his closet. She finally pulled out a jewel blue silk button up and held it out to him. "Here, try this," she said.

Johnny pulled on the shirt. It was loose and light as air and brought out his eyes. It looked good. "Tucked or untucked?" he asked.

"Tucked, and unbutton to your chest and roll up the sleeves," Sue said. "Are you going to wear heels?"

"No, I don't know. I'm not even sure where we're going," Johnny said.

"Go with dress shoes or loafers," Sue said, "And those tight black dress slacks, the ones that make your butt look good."

Johnny smiled. "Thanks sis. What would I do without my big sister to help me get dressed in the morning?"

Sue smiled, walking over to his dresser to rummage around his jewelry box. "Panic and go on your date looking like you threw together an outfit while blindfolded," she said, taking out some diamond earrings and a simple silver pendant on a black cord.

"It's not a date," Johnny insisted, rolling his and taking the earrings.

"Of course not," Sue said, smiling like she was laughing at him and then walking out of the room.

Johnny huffed and shrugged out of the shirt so he could brush his teeth and put his makeup on without getting anything on it. He had about a half an hour to finish getting ready and he still needed to style his hair.

Bobby showed up at five after eight, texting Johnny from the lobby. Johnny smiled and headed for the elevator, the fluttery, giddy feeling from earlier returning.

"Have fun on your date," Ben told him as he passed him in the hall.

"It's not a date!" Johnny called over his shoulder. Ben just laughed and Johnny stabbed the button for the lobby viciously.

Bobby was loitering near the closed gift shop when Johnny reached the lobby. He looked up and smiled brightly at him as he walked over. "Wow, you look really great," he said.

"Thanks, you too," Johnny said. Bobby was wearing a red cotton shirt with a low v-neck tucked into a nice pair of jeans. "Where are we headed?"

"There's a really cool gay bar I know," Bobby said. "We can grab a taxi or—?"

"Or?" Johnny prompted.

Bobby grinned and turned to ice. "Race you?"

Johnny smiled and flamed on. "Loser has to buy the drinks?"

"You're on!" Bobby laughed, jumping up and sliding out the door, Johnny hot on his heels.

They chased each other through the streets, laughing as they tried to sabotage each other. Johnny felt light and excited, even as Bobby nearly doused him. He felt like a teenager again, having fun without a care in the world, the only thing on his mind being the night ahead. Johnny had always liked Bobby, right from when they were kids. Bobby was one of the only people who got what it was to be the youngest, most inexperienced person on the team they were on, at least the only one who was Johnny's age. They'd been fast friends, for all they were literally fire and ice sometimes.

_ Opposites attract _ , Johnny thought, promptly shoving it away and trying to concentrate on where Bobby was heading.

Bobby stopped in front of a non-descript bar entrance with a loud 'whoop'. "I win!" he crowed.

Johnny flamed off with a scoff and landed next to him. "Uh yeah, I had no idea where we were going."

"I know," Bobby said, grinning toothily and ushering Johnny towards the door.

"Cheater," Johnny huffed.

The inside of the bar was dim, with men milling about and chatting, soft music being played over speakers that were probably a few years passed needing replacement. There was a large, slightly faded rainbow flag hanging up behind the bar. It was a far cry from the places Johnny had been going to these last few months.

Bobby found them a booth near the back. "So, how's being gay treating you so far?" he asked.

"Well," Johnny said. "It's been very freeing."

"I can tell," Bobby laughed. "I like your lipstick by the way."

Johnny reached up to touch his lips. He'd chosen a nude shade, to keep the focus on his eyes. "Thanks," he said.

Bobby's eyes followed the movement of Johnny's fingertips. "Yeah, and all your outfits are cute too. I'm a bit disappointed you didn't where one of those crop tops. You've got a stomach to die for."

Johnny laughed. "Thank you, I work out and try to eat right," he said, lounging back against the booth seat. "It takes a lot of work to look this effortlessly beautiful."

Bobby snorted and rolled his eyes, but his gaze was appreciative. Johnny fought not to squirm in his seat. "What about you?" he asked. "What was it like when you came out?"

"Confusing," Bobby said. "I mean, aside from the whole thing about being outed by the younger version of myself, it was a lot of recontextualizing. All of the things I'd pushed so far down, all of the relationships I'd had until then, trying to figure out how to flirt with men. That last one took me a while."

Johnny chuckled. "Really? I've found it's been really easy to—"

"Johnny?"

Johnny looked up to see a semi-familiar face. He was saved from having to guess at the man's name by the nametag on his apron. "Bernard, hi," he said, hoping he sounded convincing enough.

Bernard smiled down at him. "Hey, it's nice to see you again," he said. He nudged up his glasses and Johnny suddenly remembered where he'd seen him before—in the club, grinding against him and then in Bernard's apartment, legs tossed over his shoulders as Bernard blew him.

"Of course, how have you been?" Johnny asked, smiling up at him. Of all the times to run into a guy he'd fucked once.

"I've been good," Bernard said. He leaned against the side of the booth, one hand dangling just above Johnny's shoulder, a breath away from touching him. "Could be better though."

Bobby coughed. "So what's the special tonight?" he asked.

Bernard seemed startled, like he hadn't noticed Bobby was there. Johnny tried not to laugh at him. They got the menus and Bernard wandered off with one last lingering look at Johnny.

"Like I was saying," Johnny said, "I haven't really had much trouble finding men to flirt with."

Bobby grumbled. "Well, we can't  _ all  _ be beautiful famous celebrities."

Johnny laughed. "You think I'm beautiful?" he teased, giving an exaggerated toss of his head.

Bobby looked up at him, his smile turning soft at the edges. "Of course I do."

Johnny flushed, heart tripping in chest. He shifted in his seat, feeling suddenly shy. He picked up his menu and started flicking through it, aware of Bobby's eyes lingering on him. He was suddenly very glad he didn't sweat.

They ordered drinks and a plate of fries for them to share. They spent the whole night talking, not even noticing the hours passing. Johnny couldn't believe how nice it was to actually talk to someone who was like him, someone who had come out later in life after spending years trying to live a way that just wasn't fulfilling.

"I felt like I just wasn't working hard enough," Bobby said. "Like if I just did it  _ better  _ I would be happy in a relationship with a woman."

"Yeah, I know the feeling," Johnny said, swirling his drink around. "Every time I got into a new relationship, I would just… throw everything I had into it, desperate to make  _ this time  _ work. And then when it inevitably went sour, it was because I screwed up somehow, I wasn't good enough to make it work."

Bobby nodded, rolling his beer bottle between his hands. "You use all kinds of ways to justify it, to twist the narrative to fit what you think you know about yourself, but the truth was that the relationship was just… empty, right from the start."

Johnny stared down into his drink. The crushed ice in the glass had mostly melted by now, watering down the drink. Bobby's beer bottle was frosty and sending up licks of fog.

"Do you ever regret it?" Johnny asked. "Taking so long to come out?"

"Yes," Bobby said. "I feel like I could have saved myself a lot of trouble if I had just been honest with myself. I could have had better relationships—a better  _ life _ —if I had just come out sooner." He took a swig of his beer. "Then again, watching my younger self have a boyfriend and living his best little gay life probably contributes to that a bit."

Johnny laughed. "I can imagine."

Bobby smiled, but his eyes were a little sad. "Every time I saw him being happy with being gay, all I could think was how that could have been me. I could have had what he had if I had just screwed up the courage to be brave."

Johnny nodded, the silence settling around them for a moment. "What about you?" Bobby asked. "Do you regret taking so long to come out?"

"I don't know," Johnny said. "I mean, on the one hand, I've spent so long being something I'm not, denying myself a lot of things that make me so happy now. I probably could have saved myself a lot of grief. But… who's to say that coming out back then would have been better? I stayed in the closet to help protect my family, so it's hard to say what could have happened if I had come out back then. Would I even be the same person I am now?"

"It's complicated," Bobby agreed, "and there's no way to ever  _ really  _ know what could have happened. Even my younger self, yeah he was having fun in  _ this  _ time, when society had progressed enough that more people were okay with kids being gay, but would I have had fun  _ back then _ ? Who's to say?"

"We'll never know for sure," Johnny said. He downed the last of his drink and set the glass down on the table. "I mean, would it have saved me from all the heartbreak of my previous relationships? Or would it have just shifted them somewhere else?"

Bobby hummed in acknowledgment and the silence returned. Johnny ran his finger along the top of his glass. "I'm going to get another drink. You want one?"

"I'm good," Bobby said, lifting his half-full beer. "Maybe you could get more fries though?"

"I'll see if the kitchen is still open," Johnny said, getting up to head to the bar. He set his glass down and waved for the bartender. He tried to get the other bartender to look up, but Bernard noticed him first and walked over.

"Another round?" Bernard asked, grinning at him.

"Just for me," Johnny said. "Also, is the kitchen still open? We were thinking of getting more fries."

"Closed five minutes ago. I could ask them to reopen, but they might just cook my ass instead," Bernard said with a chuckle.

"That's alright then," Johnny said, waiting for Bernard to finish making his drink.

Bernard took his time fixing the drink. "So how's the date going?" he asked.

"It's not a date," Johnny answered automatically. "We're just hanging out."

Bernard's eyes lit up. "Oh yeah? Well," he leaned over the bar, one hand reaching out to Johnny's resting on the bar top, "I clock out in an hour, if you want to come home with me again."

Two weeks ago Johnny would have agreed without thinking about it. He remembered Bernard being amazing at giving head, and Johnny wasn't opposed to a repeat performance. Now Sue's words floated through his head, and he pulled back slightly. "Um…"

Bernard's hand shot out to grab Johnny's wrist. "Look, I know I said I wasn't looking for anything serious last time, but I can't get you out of my head." He pulled Johnny's arm and leaned over to whisper in his ear. "I wanna keep you forever. God I could lock you up in my closet."

Bernard pulled back to raise his eyebrows over his thick framed glasses and smirk at Johnny. "So what do you think?" he asked breathily.

Johnny heated his arm up enough that Bernard made a small surprised noise and dropped his wrist. "I think you should finish making my drink and then get us the bill," Johnny said evenly.

Bernard, realizing he'd messed up, quickly finished making the drink and handed it to Johnny, then slunk off to get the bill. He came back with the ticket and set it on the bar for Johnny to take. Johnny glanced at the total and fished out some bills from his wallet, double what the total was. He picked up his drink and downed it in one go, setting the glass down on the bills and the ticket.

"For the tip," Johnny explained, turning to head back to the table. Bobby had finished his beer and was already standing up.

"You okay?" he asked as they walked out.

"Fine," Johnny said. "I can handle myself."

"I saw," Bobby said. "Not gonna lie, that was pretty badass."

Johnny smiled, already feeling better. "Thanks," he said. "Honestly, he wasn't bad in bed last time. If he hadn't grabbed me like that, I might have gone home with him."

"Fuckboys are always ruining their own chances," Bobby tutted, shaking his head. "When will they learn?"

Johnny chuckled. "Well, he didn't  _ really  _ have a chance," he said.

"No?" Bobby asked, raising an eyebrow at him. "Why not?"

Johnny smiled, feeling bright and warm. "Well, you're here, aren't you?"

Bobby flushed pink across his face and right to the tips of his ears. It was so adorable, Johnny was tempted to bring out his phone to take a picture. Bobby cleared his throat and they walked in silence for a while. They walked aimlessly for a while, not talking but enjoying each other's company. The night had cooled quite a bit, but Johnny didn't mind. Every so often there would be a gust of cold air from Bobby. Johnny wondered if Bobby could feel his heat the same way. Every so often their hands would brush against each other, sending a little thrill running up Johnny's spine.

They walked through the city together for at least an hour. Eventually Johnny noted the time. "We should probably call it a night soon."

"We can if you want," Bobby said. "I mean, I should probably start heading back to the school."

"Yeah probably," Johnny agreed, tucking his hands into his pockets, then pulled them out again. "I should probably get back to Baxter. My sister will wonder what I'm up to."

"Wouldn't want to worry her," Bobby said. Neither of them made a move to go anywhere. Bobby cleared his throat. "I mean, unless…"

"Yes?" Johnny asked, the word coming out in a rush.

"Unless you want to… come over for coffee?" Bobby asked.

A moment of silence passed. Johnny felt a grin split his face and he snorted, trying to hide it behind his hand.

"Sorry," Bobby chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck, the pink flush back on his cheeks. "That was lame."

"No no, it was fine," Johnny said through his giggles.

Bobby looked like he was about to say something else, some kind of self-deprecating joke, but Johnny managed to get himself under control in time to cut him off. "Besides," he said, "I  _ like _ coffee."

Bobby blinked, realization clicking into his brain. "Oh," he breathed, a crooked grin growing on his face, making him look boyish with excitement. Johnny was sure his own face matched.

_ Be brave _ , Johnny thought to himself. He stepped forward into Bobby's space. Bobby's pupils went wide, but he didn't move away. Johnny could smell the beer on his cold breath. Slowly, tilting his head for a better angle, he leaned forward and pressed his lips to Bobby's.

Bobby's lips were cold, but incredibly soft. He wasted no time in kissing back, eyes fluttering closed and sighing into the touch. Bobby's hand came up to his waist, sliding around to his back so he could pull Johnny closer. Johnny hummed, a slight shiver running through him, never from the cold.

They parted after a moment, but stayed close, their breath mingling. Puffs of fog swirled between them from the difference in temperature. Johnny slid his hands up Bobby's arms, squeezing once.

"You know," he said, somehow out of breath, "my place is closer."

Bobby nodded, nearly knocking his head into Johnny's. "Yeah, okay," he said, sounding equally breathless.

Johnny grinned, heart pounding in his chest as Bobby grabbed his hand, tugging him along towards the Baxter building, only a few blocks away, like they'd known where they wanted the night to end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There was a vote on my twitter on whether or not to include some sexy bits next chapter and they voted yes so the next chapter will take way longer than my usual to write.
> 
> Translations:  
> "Likewise, and félicitations pour ton coming out," — "Likewise, and congratulations on your coming out,"  
> "Laisse faire about those two, they do this all the time," — "Never mind about those two, they do this all the time."  
> "J'men câlisse." — "I don't care/I don't give a shit."  
> "Comment esque j'srais?" — "How would I know?"  
> "S'correcte," — "It's fine,"  
> "Pi ouin, I was never really in the closet, pas vraiment." — "And yeah, I was never really in the closet, not really." (it's very québécois to double down on the negatives, especially when using both languages)  
> "Fais-toi pas à croire, Canada has its fair share of hatefulness," — "Don't fool yourself, Canada has its fair share of hatefulness,"  
> "There's always going to be des estis d'caves no matter where you go." — "There's always going to be fucking assholes no matter where you go."  
> "Pas sérieux," — "Not serious," (this is a very québécois sarcastic phrase that's used in the same way as the English 'no kidding')  
> "J'pense qu'vous allez ben vous entendre. Vous seriez cute ensemble." — "I think you two will hit it off really well. You'd be very cute together." (in Montreal they use the English 'cute')  
> "Bonne chance!" — "Good luck!"


	9. Part I.ix: Nova

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took for-fucking-ever to write, but I finally got it done because I'm working remote from home under quarantine. It's 3am but here you go finally. I hope you enjoy it.

They took a taxi back to Baxter even though they could have used their powers like they had when they raced to the bar, but the taxi allowed them to make out with each other in the backseat, so it was a no brainer. Bobby tasted like the beer he’d been drinking and the spearmint he must have brushed his teeth with. His hands were cool as they roamed Johnny’s body, never straying too far into dangerous territory but squeezing with just enough pressure to make Johnny shiver.

They weren’t far from Baxter, so the trip didn’t take long. Johnny paid the taxi driver handsomely and practically dragged Bobby out behind him. He was about to lead him into Baxter when he stopped so suddenly that Bobby nearly crashed into him.

“Johnny? You okay?” Bobby asked. “Do you… want to stop?”

“Hm? No I’m fine,” Johnny said, squeezing Bobby’s hand. “I was just thinking that if we go in through the front, my family might catch us.”

“Am I to be your dirty little secret?” Bobby purred, crowding up behind Johnny and grabbing his hips.

Johnny’s breath caught in his throat. “Tempting, but no,” he said. “I just don’t want to have to deal with them teasing me about my ‘not a date’ with you. At least not right  _ now _ , when we could be focussed on… other things.”

Bobby audibly swallowed. “Yeah, that would be… distracting,” he said. “Is there a back way in? Some way we won’t get noticed?”

“Yeah I’ve got an idea,” Johnny said, stepping back from the building and looking up. He looked at Bobby and grinned, holding out his hand. “Do you trust me?”

“Who am I, Jasmine?” Bobby asked, taking Johnny’s hand. “Just don't drop me.”

“I won’t drop you if you don't let go,” Johnny said. He gripped Bobby tightly and flamed on, flying them upwards. “And you struck me more as an Elsa.”

“Har har, I’ve  _ never _ heard that before,” Bobby said.

Johnny flew them up the side of the building until they reached Johnny’s floor. He always kept a window open just in case a certain spider needed to crawl in at ass o’clock in the morning to get a patch job, so it was easy to slip inside. They landed in the hall outside Johnny’s bedroom (close enough that Johnny could hear someone come in, but with hardwood floors that could be easily cleaned of dirt and blood) and quickly slipped inside. Johnny was glad he’d decided to put all of his discarded clothing away before he left.

For a moment after the door shut behind them, Johnny hesitated, a bubble of trepidation rising in his gut. For all he’d been basically whoring around since coming out, this was the first time he had ever brought someone back to his place, and there was a kind of intimacy in that, something Johnny was suddenly unsure he was ready for. Was he rushing into something headlong again, like he’d been doing with all the men who didn’t matter? This was Bobby Drake, Johnny’s friend. Would they still be friends if they slept together? Did Johnny even want to be friends with Bobby, or did he want something  _ more _ ?

Bobby’s hand landed on Johnny’s shoulder and the bubble burst, melting away into nothing. Johnny turned and smiled at Bobby, feeling nothing but warm as Bobby leaned in for a kiss. They fell back against the wall, Bobby pressing himself into Johnny, hands running up his sides. Johnny moaned and wrapped his arms around Bobby’s neck, spreading his thighs so Bobby could fit between them.

They made out against the wall for a minute, growing increasingly frenzied. Johnny threw back his head and moaned as Bobby sunk his teeth into his sensitive neck. He tangled one hand in Bobby’s hair, tugging on it to tilt Bobby’s face back up for another kiss. Johnny rolled his hips forward, grinning into the kiss when Bobby let out a moan. With a growl, Bobby started to tug at Johnny’s shirt.

“Careful, that’s real silk,” Johnny complained as his shirt was yanked a little rougher than he’d like.

“Of course it is,” Bobby muttered, but he did manage to slow down a little, at least until he got it off of Johnny and flung it across the room. He paused and pulled back, looking Johnny up and down, taking in his heaving, flushed chest and toned stomach. “Fuck you’re gorgeous. I’m both jealous and really fucking excited.”

Johnny smiled, biting his lip and canting his hip slightly, knowing just how to put on a show. He reached out and pulled on the hem of Bobby’s shirt. “You next.”

Bobby grinned and shed his shirt. Johnny didn’t know what Bobby was jealous of, he was just as toned, planes of pale skin shifting over hard muscle. Johnny reached out and slid a hand up Bobby’s stomach and chest, licking his lips.

“If I said you had a hot body, would you hold it against me?” Johnny asked with an exaggerated waggle of his eyebrows.

Bobby snorted. “I think you're the one with the ‘hot’ body here,” he said. “I’m cool as a cucumber baby.”

Johnny laughed, feeling like he could do this all night. If they just made out all night and traded stupid pickup lines and banter, Johnny would be okay with that. He was normally so desperate to get to the fun parts, but with Bobby he felt like he could take his time.

Bobby laid kisses across Johnny’s collar and shoulders. Johnny trailed his hands up and down Bobby’s back, mapping his skin. His hands dipped low and he grabbed Bobby’s ass, squeezing two handfuls through his jeans. Bobby hummed, thrusting his hips into Johnny’s, grinding their erections together. One of his legs slipped between Johnny’s thighs, pressing in all the right place. Johnny moaned and tossed his head back, rocking into the delicious friction. He cracked his eyes open and noticed something in the air.

“Hey,” he said, poking Bobby in the side to get his attention.

“Mm? What?” Bobby asked, still biting kisses into Johnny’s skin.

“Look,” Johnny said. Curls of white clouds puffed up, swirling towards the ceiling until they dissipated into the cool air.

“Steam,” Bobby said, passing a hand through one of the clouds, “We’re  _ literally _ steaming.”

There was a pause as they looked at each other, but then Johnny cracked up and Bobby followed shortly after. Soon they were doubled over with laughter.

“Oh my  _ God _ ,” Bobby cackled. “This is  _ awful _ . I knew from the second we kissed that we were going to get someone making a joke about it. Now I’m going to have to look them in the eye with a straight face and try not to crack up because I know they’re  _ right _ .”

A fresh wave of laughter had Johnny lean back against the wall to brace himself. This was all so absurd, he felt like he was in some kind of dream, which was exacerbated by the foggy, dream-like quality the steam gave the room. Bobby dropped his head onto Johnny’s shoulder, shaking with the force of his laughter. Johnny wrapped his arms around Bobby, feeling his cooler body against his own. This felt good, this felt  _ right _ .

Their laughter began to die down and they were left with the silence of the room, the only sound their harsh breathing. Johnny stared up at the ceiling, watching the clouds of steam curl through the air. This whole situation was entirely absurd. A sliver of nervousness from before came worming its way back into Johnny’s head. What was he doing?

Bobby picked up his head and stared into Johnny’s eyes. They were close enough that they’re breaths mingled together, creating more puffs of steam. Bobby leaned forward, pressing their foreheads together, his arms sliding around Johnny to pull him close. They stayed there for a moment, existing in each other’s presence. Johnny shivered, knocking his nose into Bobby’s. Slowly, like they might startle the other, they tilted their heads in tandem, lips meeting in a soft kiss.

Johnny sighed into the kiss, eyes fluttering closed. He’d had plenty of lovers since coming out, handsome men who devoured him with their eyes and pulled him apart with their hands and teeth, but he’d never had this. He’d never had anything slow and curious, tasting and exploring, ready to spend the whole night getting to know the other person's body. It felt good, better than Johnny had ever expected. He felt like time had slowed down, like he could spend ages in this moment, kissing Bobby while pressed back against the wall.

Bobby’s arm tightened around Johnny’s waist. He pulled him away from the wall and towards the bed, kissing him the entire way. They reached the bed and Bobby pulled him down, pulling him onto his lap. His hands travelled from Johnny’s waist to his hips and finally to his ass. He gave an appreciative hum as he squeezed.

“You’re unfair all over, aren’t you?” Bobby said, kissing down Johnny’s chest. He bit down on Johnny’s nipple and flicked his tongue over it to soothe the sting.

“You know you’re gorgeous as well, right?” Johnny asked, shivering and tangling his fingers through Bobby’s hair.

“Yeah but I’m not  _ you _ ,” Bobby said. “You’re on a whole ‘nother level compared to me. To everyone.”

“I’m really not,” Johnny said, but he couldn’t help the small smile on his face.

Bobby looked up at him, eyes wide and curious, like he was seeing Johnny for the first time. One hand left Johnny’s ass and came up to cup his cheek, thumb stroking along the ridge of Johnny’s cheekbone. He stretched up to kiss him, slow and meaningful.

Johnny leaned forward into the kiss and they toppled over onto the bed, Johnny straddling Bobby’s hips. He smiled and began to rock his hips, grinding down onto Bobby. Bobby groaned and his hands reappeared on Johnny’s hips as he started to thrust up. He reached around and started fiddling with Johnny’s belt, then his zipper. Johnny helpfully pushed his pants down and kicked them off, sending them over the edge of the bed to the floor, then reached for Bobby’s pants, giving them the same treatment.

Johnny settled back on top of Bobby, flesh to flesh, their cocks brushing against each other. Groaning, Johnny wrapped a hand around both of their cocks and stroked, slowly rocking his hips into it. More puffs of steam puffed up from where their skin connected. Bobby’s chest heaved and flushed pink. Johnny wanted to taste him all across that flush, which extended almost onto his stomach, but that would require moving away, and the friction between them was too much to resist.

“Johnny,” Bobby moaned, swallowing thickly. “God you’re so amazing.”

Johnny shivered. “Bobby,” he sighed. He ran his thumb over the head of Bobby’s cock, sliding through the precum beading there, moaning when Bobby twitched under him. “I want to ride you.”

Bobby groaned. “Sounds good to me. You got everything?”

Johnny paused for a moment, realizing that he did in fact  _ not _ have everything. “I don't have any condoms, just lube,” he said.

Bobby raised an eyebrow. “Really?” he asked.

Johnny flushed. “I don't usually bring guys home with me. I go to their places. The lube is for uh… toys,” he explained.

Bobby swallowed, eyes going dark at the mention of toys. He cleared his throat. “I don’t have any either. I was hopeful about tonight, but I erm, didn’t want to be presumptuous?”

Johnny flexed his hand around their cocks. “So much for that,” he purred, rocking slightly again. “It’s fine. I can’t actually catch anything. I burn too hot for anything to survive.”

Bobby ran his hands up Johnny’s thighs. “What about the mess?” he asked, voice breathy.

Johnny shivered. “I don’t mind,” he said. “It sounds kinda hot actually.”

Bobby groaned. “You’re going to be the death of me,” he whined. “Okay yeah, let’s do it. Ride my cock baby.”

Johnny bit down on a keening noise and got up so he could dig through the nightstand for the bottle of lube. Bobby situated himself more fully on the bed as Johnny crawled back over him, dropping the bottle onto the sheets. He bent down to kiss Bobby, excitement tingling through his body from his head to his toes.

“You wanna prep me?” Johnny asked. “Or do you wanna watch me do it to myself?”

Bobby’s eyes went dark again and he hissed through his teeth. “I want to watch you,” he moaned. “God that sounds so hot.”

Johnny grinned and reached for the lube, leaning back so Bobby could get the best angle. He wasted no time coating his fingers and sliding one into his hole, barely bothering to tease himself. He already felt too wound up to draw this out. If he tried to tease either of them he didn't think they’d get to the main event.

Bobby scooted up on the pillows a little, reaching down to stroke his cock as he watched Johnny finger himself open. “Fuck, look at you,” he groaned, licking his lips. “Absolutely gorgeous.”

“You like what you see?” Johnny purred, plunging another finger inside of him, stretching himself out. He was glad he’d taken up yoga, or otherwise this position would be way too difficult to hold for long.

“Yeah,” Bobby said. “You’re like a work of art, fuck.”

Johnny licked his lips. “You’re not so bad yourself,” he purred. “C’mon, work that cock for me baby.”

Bobby grinned and stroked his cock faster, canting his hips up and spreading his legs so Johnny could see more. Johnny moaned, adding another finger and thrusting faster. He curled his fingers and jolted as he pressed into his prostate, letting out a loud cry.

“Okay, we need to get on with this or I’m going to explode,” Johnny whined. He pulled his fingers out and crawled over top of Bobby, snatching up the lube from the sheets. He dribbled lube onto Bobby’s cock, giving it a quick stroke before lining himself up.

Bobby’s hands slid up Johnny’s thighs to grip his hips. “Ready?” he asked.

Instead of answering, Johnny just grinned and slid down on Bobby’s cock, making them both moan, Bobby’s hand tightening on him and there was a puffing noise as more steam curled up from them. Johnny moaned as he bottomed out, Bobby’s cock sitting fully inside of him. He could feel how much colder than him Bobby was, how he drew the heat out of his surroundings, how strangely it matched up with Johnny’s powers flooding heat everywhere. If they didn’t have opposing powers, Johnny didn't think they’d be reacting so strongly, reaching such extreme temperatures they were literally creating clouds of steam.

“You feel so good,” Johnny moaned, tossing his head back and starting to rock his hips. “God,  _ Bobby _ .”

Bobby panted underneath him, staring up at him through dark eyes, pupils blown wide. His hands flexed on Johnny’s hips as he moved. “Johnny,” he gasped. “ _ Fuck _ , Johnny, faster.”

Johnny groaned and sped up his hips, reaching out to grab the headboard to brace himself as he moved. Bobby’s cock brushed against his prostate with every movement, sending little shocks of pleasure up Johnny’s spine with each thrust. They’d probably used more lube than necessary, but the way Bobby’s cock slid into him made the mess that Johnny was going to have to clean up later so worth it.

Bobby moaned loudly, one hand leaving Johnny’s hip to wrap around his cock, stroking it in time with Johnny’s movements. “You’re so fucking gorgeous,” he breathed. “So fucking beautiful.”

Johnny felt his face heat a little. He’d heard it before a hundred different ways, from a hundred different pairs of lips, but the way Bobby said it somehow felt more  _ real _ , more genuine. Johnny was used to being told he was good looking, but something in Bobby’s voice, in the way he stared up at Johnny like he was seeing a star for the first time, made Johnny want to believe it.

Bobby’s other hand trailed up Johnny’s stomach, his touch ice cold but not unwelcome. Johnny groaned as Bobby’s hand smoothed across his abs and chest, stopping very briefly at his neck, like he was going to wrap his fingers around his throat. Johnny moaned at just the thought of that and tossed his head back, working his hips faster. Bobby groaned low in his chest, shifting to grip at Johnny’s shoulder, thumb pressing into the divot between his clavicles.

Johnny could feel his orgasm start to build, that heat low in his belly starting to pool. He worked his hips faster, chasing the feeling, squinting his eyes shut. Bobby’s hand let go of his shoulder and reached up to cup his cheek, thumb stroking across his lips. Johnny pried his eyes open and stared down at Bobby through the haze of steam they were created between them.

Bobby was staring up at him reverently, eye’s hooded and dark with lust, his lips parted as he gasped for breath. Johnny grinned and tilted his head to kiss the palm of Bobby’s hand, his lips tingling from the cold. Bobby groaned and surged up, pulling Johnny down to kiss him. They met with a tangle of wet tongues, panting into one another’s mouths.

“I’m close,” Bobby groaned, his hips still jolting up as Johnny rocked down onto him.

“Fuck, me too,” Johnny gasped between kisses.

Bobby dropped his head to Johnny’s shoulder, his arm curling around his back to hold him close. “Can I… can I come inside you? Johnny please,  _ fuck _ ! Can I come inside you?”

Johnny shuddered. “Yeah baby, come inside me. Fuck, come inside my ass,  _ Bobby _ !”

Bobby moaned loudly, nails scraping against Johnny’s back as he jolted, hips snapping up into Johnny as he came. Johnny whined, so close to the edge he could taste it on the end of his tongue. He ground his hips down onto Bobby, searching for just the right angle that would send him over the edge. Bobby shivered and rocked his hips, completely overstimulated but with enough brainpower to remember to keep jerking Johnny off. He barely made it through three strokes before Johnny was coming.

Johnny threw back his head and wailed, his orgasm crashing through his entire body, making his toes curl and his back arch. For a second, the world whited out around him and Johnny became a being of pure sensation, only able to feel the pleasure coursing through his veins. After what felt like an eternity, Johnny began to float back into awareness, his entire body trembling from the aftershocks. He slumped against Bobby, letting out a deep, satisfied sigh.

Bobby tightened his arms around Johnny and leaned them over so they flopped down onto the bed, still tangled in one another. The only sound in the room was their harsh breathing and the slight hiss of steam. Johnny sighed again, the pleasant feeling of exhaustion starting to creep in. Bobby pressed his lips against Johnny’s nose, not quite a kiss, making Johnny chuckle softly. He shivered as he felt the come and lube leak from his ass.

“Just a sec,” Bobby murmured before getting up.

Johnny watched him shuffle to the ensuite bathroom, then heard water running a moment later. Bobby returned with a damp washcloth and crawled back into bed next to him. Gently, Bobby cleaned up the mess between Johnny’s thighs, careful to avoid any sensitive spots. Johnny shivered at the gentle treatment all the same, letting out soft moans as Bobby worked.

Finally Bobby finished and tossed the washcloth away, flopping back down next to Johnny on the dirty sheets. He flung his arm over Johnny and snuggled close, mumbling something waking up early. He pressed one last kiss to Johnny’s nose before he went limp against the pillows, dead asleep.

Calm silence settled over Johnny, soothing like a balm over aching skin. The only sound in the room was Bobby’s deep breathing, and under that the steady beating of his own heart. Johnny curled closer to Bobby and let himself be soothed to blissful sleep.

* * *

Johnny woke up with a body pressed against his back, an arm thrown over his waist and a cool, moist breath tickling across the back of his neck. The memories of last night floated back in and Johnny smiled, turning over to watch Bobby's sleeping face.

Morning light flooded in through the windows, casting everything a pinkish-golden glow. Bobby slept peacefully, completely dead to the world, making little snuffling noises with every breath. Johnny couldn't help them smile on his face. He carefully turned over so he could continue watching Bobby without straining his neck. Bobby huffed as Johnny shifted in his arms, arm tightening around Johnny's waist as thought to prevent him from leaving. When Johnny settled back down, Bobby relaxed again with a soft sigh. Johnny let out a quiet chuckle.

Johnny had never really done this, just lounged in bed with his companion from the night before, studying their face for what felt like hours. If he spent the night, which was rare, he usually got up after a minute or two and got ready to leave. He'd never really taken the time to note the light dusting of freckles across their nose, or how his lashes were thick but short and blunt.

Then again, Johnny considered, he'd never really slept with anyone like Bobby before. Random men he met in the club, the person of the night who managed to catch his eye first. Bobby… he'd known Bobby since he was a kid, since they were  _ both _ kids. They were friends, he  _ cared  _ about Bobby.

Suddenly Johnny felt that nervousness again. Had he made a mistake sleeping with Bobby? Would this ruin their friendship? They'd never been particularly close, but there had always been a connection between them, a kind of draw. Johnny could count the people he truly considered 'friends' on his fingers, he didn't know if he was prepared to lose one because he couldn't keep his pants on around anyone hot and interested.

Bobby snorted in his sleep, nose scrunching up cutely as he pressed his face into the pillow. He grumbled a little and cracked open his eyes. After a moment he seemed to realize where he was and smiled blearily at Johnny. "Hey," he hummed.

"Hey," Johnny answered, trying not to give away his nervousness.

Bobby sighed and stretched, his hand travelling up Johnny's ribs. "Morning," he yawned. "You sleep okay?"

"I slept great," Johnny said, starting to relax.

"Oh good," Bobby said, rubbing his eyes with the hand that wasn't curled around Johnny. "People sometimes have trouble cuddling with me. On account of being cold all the time."

"I don't get cold," Johnny said.

Bobby looked up at him and smiled, bright and happy. "Oh, right. Neat."

Johnny felt himself smiling back. Without thinking about it, he moved forward to place a quick kiss on Bobby's lips. Bobby hummed and kissed back, moving forward so their noses bumped against each other, causing them both to laugh.

"We should probably brush our teeth if we're going to keep this up," Bobby remarked.

"I don't need to," Johnny said. "The fire burns everything away."

"Gross," Bobby laughed, leaning forward to kiss Johnny again, his hand travelling from Johnny's ribs back down to his hip.

Johnny sighed into the kiss. His phone chimed from somewhere in the room and he grumbled. "I should check that," he said regretfully.

"Sure," Bobby said, removing his hand and letting him up. "I should probably check mine as well."

Johnny rolled out of bed. At some point they had kicked the sheets off the bed, neither of them really needing them to keep warm. Johnny found his phone in his slacks and pulled it out. It was another text from Peter.

Johnny ignored it and set his phone aside. He had other things to think about.

Bobby was sitting up on the bed, completely naked scrolling through his phone. He looked up at Johnny and smiled. "Anything important?" he asked.

"Nope," Johnny said. He sat down on the bed and Bobby eagerly set his phone aside, reaching for him. They fell back onto the bed, naked bodies flush against each other. Johnny hummed and shivered, one hand wrapping around Bobby's back and the other reaching up to curl in his hair.

"You're so damn gorgeous," Bobby groaned into his lips. His hands reappeared at Johnny's waist, reminding Johnny of last night.

Johnny moaned as Bobby began to mouth down his neck, kissing and nipping the sensitive skin. "We should probably get up and shower. We forgot last night."

Bobby hummed into the nape of his neck. "Are we sharing?" he asked.

Johnny grinned. "Obviously," he said.

Bobby sat up and grinned mischievously down at Johnny. "Well then, what are we waiting for?"

Johnny matched his grin and sat up, taking Bobby's hand and dragging him along to the en suite, feeling like a giddy teenager. They got about five minutes into the shower before Bobby dropped to his knees.

“No tan lines,” Bobby remarked as he took Johnny’s dick in his hand. “You have a tanning bed or something? God you have a nice cock.”

“I sunbathe,” Johnny said, inhaling sharply as Bobby started to lick him. “On my balcony.”

“Seems dangerous,” Bobby mumbled. “What with all the people who fly in New York.”

“Reed built a special screen,” Johnny moaned as Bobby took him fully into his mouth. “But I kinda like a bit of risk.”

Bobby didn’t answer, mouth occupied with other things. He bobbed his head and hollowed his cheeks, clearly trying to bring Johnny off as quickly as possible. Johnny threw back his head, thrusting his hips into Bobby’s mouth, his moans reverberating throughout the bathroom. Bobby put one hand on his hip to keep him steady, but otherwise relaxed his throat to take as much of Johnny as he could.

Johnny didn’t last long, and came with a loud moan, spilling into Bobby’s mouth. Bobby spat it out into the stream up water and stood, pressing kisses along Johnny’s collar as he wrapped a hand around his cock. Johnny managed to get his brain online enough to realize he should help and reached down to take over. Bobby groaned loudly and fucked into his fist. He came with a full body shudder, kissing Johnny fiercely. The kisses turned lazy as sweet as he rode his orgasm out, before he finally slumped against him. Johnny chuckled and reached for the body wash.

"I thought you didn't need to brush your teeth?" Bobby asked once they had actually finished showering and were finishing getting ready for the day.

"I don't," Johnny said, taking the brush out of his mouth. "I still do it though. It feels kinda weird not to."

"Fair enough," Bobby said. He swished some mouthwash around his mouth and spat it out into the sink, having to nudge Johnny aside to do so. "I'm going to go put my clothes on," he said, patting Johnny on the butt as he passed.

"If you must," Johnny chuckled, turning back to the mirror to finish scrubbing his teeth. He took note of the marks across his neck and chest. They were lighter than usual, Bobby hadn't been as rough on him as the guys he usually went home with.

_ You didn't go home with Bobby _ , Johnny thought to himself.  _ You brought him home. What do you want to bet that means? _

The nervousness from earlier came back, fluttering in Johnny's stomach. He bit down on his toothbrush for a moment, trying to take deep breaths. He finished brushing his teeth and exited the bathroom.

Bobby was just finishing pulling on his shirt. He turned and smiled. "So, last night was fun," he said.

The nervous fluttering doubled. "Sure was," Johnny said, smiling back.

Bobby shuffled on his feet, ducking his head slightly like he was also nervous. "I'd… I'd really like to see you again, if you want."

The fluttering moved up into Johnny's chest, excited now. "Oh. Okay sure," he said.

Bobby looked up, eyes shining. "Really?" he asked, a crooked grin on his face.

Johnny smiled. "Yeah," he said.

Bobby's crooked grin grew. "Cool, awesome," he said. "Do you want my—you already have my number, right, of course."

Johnny laughed. "I do. I'll text you?"

"Of course," Bobby said. He checked his phone and grimaced at the time. "Shit. Okay so I actually do have to go. I've got a class I totally didn't prep for and there are only so many times you can play a movie in class before someone starts asking questions. But I really do want to go out with you again."

Johnny nodded. "Yeah, I want to go out with you too."

Bobby smiled and stepped towards Johnny, wrapping an arm around him and kissing him. Johnny leaned into the kiss with a sigh, a thrill running up his spine. He wanted to drown in this feeling.

"I need to go," Bobby said, sounding pained to do so. He pulled away from Johnny and headed for the door, then stopped. "Uh, just to be clear, we did agree to go on a  _ date _ , right?"

Johnny chuckled. "Yes, a date."

"Oh good," Bobby said, relieved. "Just making sure." His phone started ringing and he glared at it. "Okay, that's Kitty, I need to go before she puts me on detention duty again."

Johnny snorted. "Go. I'll text you later," he promised.

Bobby flashed him one last smile before heading out the door. Johnny felt warm and light, like he was flying. He smiled to himself and went about getting dressed.

Ben, Reed, and Sue were in the kitchen when he came down, the kids nowhere to be seen. Johnny squeezed by Ben to get to the fridge.

"Saw Bobby heading down earlier," Ben sniggered. "How was the not-a-date?"

"It was good," Johnny said. "I rode his dick and he gave me a blowjob in the shower. Is there any coffee left?"

" _ Johnny _ ," Sue admonished while Ben choked on his coffee, coughing and spluttering.

"Ask a jackass question, get a jackass answer," Johnny said, shrugging a shoulder as he peeled a clementine.

"You  _ did  _ set yourself up," Reed commiserated even as he thumped on Ben's back, not that it seemed to do anything.

Ben grumbled, still coughing. Johnny grinned and popped a slice of clementine in his mouth.

* * *

_ Now _

Peter swung through the city, feeling weirdly numb. He'd just come from the Statue of Liberty after hanging out with Johnny for the first time in half a month. Peter had apologized for being a jerk, they'd eaten gross pizza, and Johnny had told him all about how he was maybe dating Bobby Drake.

"It's nothing official yet," Johnny said, licking pizza sauce off his fingers. "We've been on one not-a-date and one  _ actual  _ date as of yesterday. But y'know… I think it could happen."

"Right," Peter said, scooping up the pile of pineapple he'd pulled off his pizza and dumping it onto Lady Liberty's head. A little treat for the birds.

"I mean we've known each other for a long time," Johnny said. "Almost as long as you and I have been friends. We've got a lot in common."

"Yeah," Peter said, flinging a piece of pineapple over the edge. A seagull swooped down and snagged it before it could go very far.

"Plus we'd never have to worry about one another's powers. We cancel each other out," Johnny said. He looked over at Peter and smiled. "You know Bobby too. What do you think of him?"

A thousand and one things marched to the end of Peter's tongue, ready to list all the ways Bobby and Johnny would never work together. Then he saw Johnny's eyes, bright and shining with excitement and delight. His smile was shy, but hopeful. Johnny looked breathtakingly happy to be starting a potential relationship, something Peter hadn't seen in a long time.

So Peter swallowed his tongue, bit back all of the things he could have said. "He's a nice guy," he said, the words feeling odd in his mouth for all that it was the truth.

Because Bobby  _ was  _ nice. Spider-Man had fought alongside Iceman on more than one occasion, and he was genuinely a good person. He was funny and he liked people, he liked helping people and doing good in the world. There was nothing about him that Peter could identify as bad. Maybe he wasn't the cleverest of people, and he could be immature and brash, but the exact same could be said about Johnny. The more Peter thought about it, the more Peter could see how the two of them would work really well together.

So why did it feel like Peter was going to lose his mind at the thought of Johnny and Bobby together?

Johnny beamed. "He is, isn't he?"

They'd talked for a while longer, Peter putting on a brave face the entire time, even though all he felt like doing was flinging himself off the statue and diving headfirst into the water below. He'd thought, in the days that Johnny hadn't been talking to him, that his issues stemmed from the fact that Johnny was sleeping around with a bunch of strangers who didn't care about him past the surface level. Despite all the teasing Peter liked to do, he did truly think that Johnny deserved the world, and wanted him to have the best. Now here was something genuinely good for Johnny, someone Peter—under any other circumstances—considered a good, kind person, who was well matched with Johnny, and it was all he could do to bite his tongue so he didn't talk Johnny out of it.

What was  _ wrong  _ with him?

Peter swung through the city aimlessly, lost in his own head. He'd try to comfort himself by telling himself that they'd only been on one date, that there was a chance it wouldn't happen, but that didn't exactly matter if Peter was so upset even by the  _ idea  _ of the two of them dating.

_ Bobby's a good guy, you should be happy for Johnny _ , Peter told himself as he did a lazy backflip over a street.  _ They're really well matched, they're already friends, and you like Bobby. _

Peter tried to forget about it, tried to put the whole thing out of his head. What did it matter who Johnny dated? Johnny was a grown man who was perfectly capable of making his own decisions, good or bad. It wasn't any of Peter's business who Johnny wanted to date. Besides, wasn't it better that it was someone that Peter already knew? Of all the people Peter could think of off the top of his head, Bobby was probably the best option anyway.

_ You're being a nosy bastard _ , Peter told himself. It wasn't his place to even comment on the whole thing, so he was just going to put it out of his head.

Resolved, Peter finally turned to start swinging home. He really needed to wash his suit tonight, as it was starting to get a little funky and his spare was covered in cement dust. Peter usually tried to wash them as soon as he made the switch from one to the other, but sometimes he just got lazy and didn't.

_ I should call Aunt May _ , he thought.  _ It's not too late, I can probably catch her after her shows wrap up for the night. _

Peter was so focussed on planning out his night in his head that he nearly missed the billboard until he was practically on top of it. The ten foot image of Johnny in makeup shouldn't have made him fumble his swing the way it did, he saw it nearly every day because he was too damn stubborn to change his route, but Peter had to catch himself quickly to avoid splattering himself on the pavement. He managed to correct himself at the last moment and kept swinging, trying not to grind his teeth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is the end of Part I, we'll be getting into Part II with the next chapter and I'm really excited.


	10. Part II.i: Aether

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, how's everyone doing? Staying home? Washing your hands? Good. As a reward have some JohnnyBobby cuteness. Don;t worry we'll get Peter being a dumbass next chapter.

Over the course of two weeks, Johnny found that it was as different to date a man as it was to sleep with a man. There were different rules, different ways that they spent time together then Johnny had done when he was with a woman. It sometimes felt no different than when they'd hung out before aside from slightly more flirty comments and a lot more making out. Other times it felt entirely different, like Johnny had never dated before and everything was shiny and new.

In a way, Johnny realized he never  _ had  _ dated before, not in a way that he'd ever truly enjoyed. He'd  _ liked  _ dating, just as much as he'd  _ liked  _ the women he dated. Johnny enjoyed being the other half of a couple, having someone else waiting for him at the end of the day. Dating a man was all the fun he'd had being part of a couple before, but paired with the fact that he was actually  _ attracted  _ to the person he was dating.

Johnny had to admit, he was  _ very  _ attracted to Bobby.

Maybe it was that they'd known each other for so long, or maybe it was that they were so similar to one another, but he and Bobby just seemed to 'click'. Johnny had been nervous at first, having never dated another man and not knowing what to expect, but despite his trepidation, he and Bobby hit it off. Johnny wasn't necessarily surprised, they'd always gotten along, but dating was a whole new situation for the two of them. Johnny had worried that he would choke and mess it up somehow, but all of his anxieties seemed to melt away by the time he and Bobby were together.

They spent two weeks 'seeing each other', going on dates that often ended in the bedroom, either Johnny's or Bobby's, but even when they didn't end up tangled in sullied sheets, they had fun together. There were nights that they simply laid together, talking until they were both too tired to stay awake. Sometimes they whittled away entire evenings watching movies and playing video games, pausing to make out occasionally. It was fun in a way Johnny hadn't experienced before.

“Alright, so if you had to be stuck on an island for a month, no flying away or getting rescued, what would you bring?” Bobby asked, tossing a handful of popcorn in his mouth.

Johnny hummed. “Are we assuming all of my necessities are taken care of? Food and water and stuff?”

“Yeah, it’s like, a resort island or something,” Bobby said. “Or there are lots of fruit trees and a lake or something, whatever. The point of the question is ‘what can’t you go without for a month’?”

“Then why didn’t you just ask that question?” Johnny asked, reaching over to snag some popcorn. They had long given up on pretending they were watching the movie and instead decided to play a game.

“Because that’s how you ask that question, everyone knows that,” Bobby said, nudging Johnny. “Come on, stop stalling and answer.”

Johnny made a show of thinking it over. “Can I bring people? Because I don’t think I could go a month without my family. What about a phone to talk to them?”

Bobby rolled his eyes. “I’m accepting that answer because I love what a sap you are,” he teased, leaning over to kiss Johnny on the cheek.

Johnny smiled. “I mean, my second answer would be a bed to sleep in, preferably mine.”

Bobby snorted. “With your literal hundreds of pillows and silk sheets and everything? I’d hate to see what you consider ‘roughing it’.”

“I can ‘rough it’ just fine,” Johnny said. “It's just if I have the  _ option _ to sleep on something soft and comfy, I’ll take it.”

Johnny decided not to mention that the reason he’d pick his bed to take with him was that it was the second thing he’d missed the most while trapped in the Negative Zone after his family. He’d slept on a stone bench for nearly two years and longed for at least a blanket the entire time.

“Your turn,” Johnny asked. “Stranded on a deserted island, basic necessities taken care of, what do you bring?”

“Probably a video game,” Bobby said. “One of those stupidly addictive ones that you can play for literal hours and it feels like five minutes.”

Johnny snorted. “So something to entertain you, okay.”

“Hey, you want to take a bed and all its fixings with you, you don't get to judge,” Bobby huffed.

Johnny rolled his eyes. “Whatever. Okay, my turn,” he said, thinking for a minute about what to ask. “If you could go on a date with any of your teammates, who would you pick? Sexuality of the other person doesn’t matter, pretend he’s into guys or curious or something.”

“Nightcrawler,” Bobby answered, scooping up another handful of popcorn.

Johnny raised an eyebrow. “Wow,  _ that _ was a quick answer. Should I be worried about competition?”

Bobby flushed a little. “Sorry, no, you don’t have to worry,” he said. “It’s just I’ve known my team for a long time, and out of all of them, Kurt seems like he’d be the nicest one to date.”

“Really?” Johnny asked.

“ _ Really _ ,” Bobby said. “Like, he’s so sweet and charming. I’ve seen him date a lot of people, and every time, even if it’s really casual, he’s just super attentive. If he took me out on a date, I  _ know _ he’d make me feel special and treat me right.”

Johnny hummed, still not entirely convinced, but willing to let it go for now. Bobby flicked a popcorn kernel at him. “Okay, your turn. Who would you date on your team?”

“Uh, fucking no one? Of the three other people on my team, one is my sister, one is my brother-in-law, and the other one is  _ Ben _ . I wouldn’t date any of them,  _ ever _ ,” Johnny said.

“Oh come on,” Bobby huffed. “If I have to answer, you have to answer, that’s the rule.”

Johnny frowned. “Okay, that’s not actually fair, my team is my  _ family _ , dating any of them would be super weird.”

“You asked me  _ knowing _ this was coming,” Bobby huffed. “You think it wouldn't be weird to date someone on my team?”

“I have basically  _ one _ option!” Johnny protested. “And it’d be super weird and uncomfortable because Ben is like my older brother. I met him when I was  _ thirteen _ .”

Bobby rolled his eyes. “So pick from the expanded list. Other people have been on the Fantastic Four, pick from them.”

Johnny huffed. “Alright  _ fine _ ,” he said. He thought back through all of the years, all the different people who’d been on the Fantastic Four. A dozen names came to mind, some of them Johnny had even dated before. Crystal, Frankie Raye, Namorita, Darla, they’d all been on the team for a short while before it all went wrong.

Johnny shook those thoughts away. It wouldn't do any good to get all melancholic about his exes while he was on a date. He thought of some of the men who’d been on the team and what they’d be like to date. His options were still a little limited though, as now that he thought about it, there hadn’t been as many men filling in on the team as there had been women. There was Luke, T’Challa, Scott, and of course Peter.

_ Peter. _

Johnny slammed the door on that train of thought before anything showed on his face. Sure he’d been in love with Peter since he was fifteen and in denial about why Spider-man got under his skin so much, and there was probably a part of Johnny that would  _ always _ be in love with Peter, but this wasn't the time to be thinking about that. There was no reason to compare Peter’s strong jaw and serious brow to Bobby’s boyish charms. Johnny shouldn’t even be  _ thinking _ about Peter’s rough, calloused hands, so incredibly strong but so incredibly gentle at the same time. Not with Bobby sitting on the bed with him, all long lines of muscle and pale skin, looking at him expectantly.

“T’Challa,” Johnny answered. “He’s a king. I play my cards right and I could be set for life as royal consort,” he said with a suggestive waggle of his eyebrows.

Bobby laughed. “So you want to be a professional mooch? Suits you,” he said, flicking another kernel at Johnny.

“Quit that, you’re going to get popcorn all over my bed,” Johnny said, brushing the dropped kernels off of his bed spread.

“Make me,” Bobby said, grinning wide and dangerously tipping the mostly empty bowl over the center of the bed.

“What are you, twelve? Knock it off,” Johnny huffed, trying to swipe the bowl away. “If you get butter on this, I’m making you pay to replace it.”

“How much does it cost?” Bobby asked.

“Three grand I think?” Johnny said. “I forget. I think I got them on sale anyway.”

“Three  _ grand _ !?” Bobby sputted. “Why would you ever pay so much for a  _ blanket _ ? How do you even sleep on something so expensive?”

“Well it has a washable cover,” Johnny said, picking another kernel off the bedspread and flicking it away. “And feel how soft it is, I couldn’t  _ not _ get it.”

“You are ridiculous,” Bobby huffed, setting the bowl on the nightstand. “It’s like you exist in an entirely different world sometimes.”

“Which is why royal consort suits me,” Johnny teased, leaning back on the bed and posing suggestively. “T’Challa would be able to keep me in a lifestyle I’m accustomed to.”

“Is that a hint?” Bobby huffed, leaning over Johnny to press a quick kiss to his lips. “I need to step up my game in order to keep you around? Gotta start hustling the stock market so I can buy you fur coats and Lamborghinis?”

“Do you even know what the stock market is?” Johnny asked, reaching up to curl his hand around the back of Bobby’s neck and pull him down for another kiss.

Bobby hummed into the kiss, putting his other arm down on the bed, caging Johnny underneath him. “I’m sure it’s not that hard,” he said.

Johnny didn't dignify that with an answer and instead wrapped his arms around Bobby, pulling him down while sliding one hand up his shirt to feel the cool skin of his stomach. He scraped his nails lightly across Bobby’s abs and grinned when he shivered. They quickly lost all their clothing after that.

"Hey so," Johnny said two hours later as they lazed in Bobby's bed, the afterglow still floating around them, "this is really good."

"Hm, I should hope so," Bobby mumbled, rolling over to press a kiss to Johnny's shoulder. "I mean, I know  _ I _ enjoyed myself. You been faking this entire time?"

"Not at all," Johnny said, turning onto his side so he could snuggle into Bobby. "I've been enjoying this a whole lot." He pushed Bobby onto his back and swung a leg over his waist to straddle him. "So much in fact, that I think I want to make this official."

"Official?" Bobby questioned, sliding his cool hands up Johnny's thighs, giving them a squeeze just under Johnny's ass.

"Yeah, like—" Johnny suddenly felt a little nervous. "I mean like um, dating?"

"We are dating, we go on dates," Bobby said, brow furrowing slightly. "You okay Johnny?"

"I mean—" Johnny fidgeted, trying to get the words out. Had Bobby thought they were 'dating' this whole time and Johnny just hadn't realized? Would he get upset if Johnny asked? Suddenly Johnny regretted bringing it up.

After a moment, Bobby seemed to realize what Johnny was getting at. "Oh! You mean you want to be  _ boyfriends _ ?" he asked.

Johnny flushed; it sounded so silly and juvenile out loud. "Well—"

He didn't get to finish the thought as Bobby surged up to kiss him, tumbling them over onto the sheets. Johnny relaxed, smiling into the kiss and laughing when Bobby began peppering his neck and chest with staccato kisses. He squeaked when Bobby playfully bit down on his shoulder.

"Boyfriends," Bobby said again. "Sounds good to me."

"Oh good," Johnny said. "I wasn't really sure how to say it. 'Cause we've been  _ dating _ , but we never really said anything about it being exclusive or serious. I wanted to be sure."

"That's fair," Bobby said. "I mean I  _ thought  _ we were exclusive, but I didn't want to assume anything either, so I didn't say anything."

"I want to be exclusive," Johnny said, tangling one hand in Bobby's already messy hair. "I want to be  _ yours _ ."

A shiver ran through Bobby. "Well, can't say no to  _ that _ , now can I?"

Johnny chuckled and stretched up for a kiss, Bobby meeting him halfway. They rolled across the sheets for a while, hands roaming over flesh. Bobby's fingers skittered up Johnny's sides, right where he was ticklish, making Johnny squeak and jolt. He retaliated by pinching Bobby's stomach, and eventually they both devolved into fits of laughter.

"God, my first boyfriend and we're already abusing each other," Johnny huffed, trying to catch his breath.

"Hey that's right," Bobby said. "I'm your first actual boyfriend, aren't I?"

Johnny rolled onto his side and smiled at him. "Yup, I've never had an actual boyfriend before. You're officially my first."

"I feel all special," Bobby said, wrapping his cool arms around Johnny to pull him close. "I feel like I should ask your family's permission or something."

"You can certainly try if you want." Johnny chuckled. "Reed is pretty easy to win over, just let him talk your ear off about science. Ben is a little trickier, he can be a bit…  _ protective _ . He'd probably try to intimidate you, scare you away, but if you can handle that he's pretty easy going."

"What about your sister?" Bobby asked.

"Never cross my sister,  _ ever _ ," Johnny answered. "Sue will be entirely polite and accepting, treat you like family, but the moment you do anything to hurt me—" Johnny broke off with a whistle. "You won't even see her coming."

"Great,  _ that's  _ not terrifying at all," Bobby said. "If I hadn't been an X-Man since I was a teenager, I might be intimidated."

Johnny laughed. "Don't worry, if they try anything, I'll be there to keep them off your back."

"My hero," Bobby hummed, leaning down to kiss Johnny.

"Well," Johnny said, tilting his head to deepen the kiss, "I am expecting you to do the same when I meet your family."

Bobby stilled. "My family?" he asked. "Do you mean the X-Men or…?"

Johnny raised an eyebrow. "I mean  _ yes _ , but I figured I'd meet your parents eventually."

Bobby made a pinched expression. "Yeah, eventually," he said quietly. "Maybe in like, a year or five."

Johnny got the sense they were starting to travel into uncomfortable territory, which wasn't something Johnny thought they needed to deal with five minutes after deciding to become an official couple. He decided that deflection was his best option. "A year huh? Planning on keeping me around for that long already?"

Bobby relaxed. "Maybe I'm planning on taking you for everything in the divorce," he teased, settling back down next to Johnny.

"Good luck with that. Like you said, I'm a professional mooch. It's all Reed's money, so if you want to get your sticky little mitts on it, you'd have to go through my sister." Johnny said. "Which is—as I said—a very bad idea."

Bobby clicked his tongue. "Damn, guess I'll have to think of something else," he said. He leaned down to lay kisses all along Johnny's neck. "So here's a nutty question, what's your life insurance payout look like?"

Johnny laughed and grabbed a pillow to smack Bobby with. Bobby grabbed the other one and they tussled for a while, eventually discarding the pillows so they could wrestle. It wasn't long after that that they abandoned wrestling entirely.

* * *

Telling their respective families went better than expected. As Johnny had predicted, Reed and Sue were immediately overjoyed to know that Johnny was dating Bobby, and Sue insisted on having Bobby over for dinner to 'meet him properly'. Also as Johnny had predicted, Ben—who had never once had an issue with Bobby—was now suddenly suspicious of Bobby's intentions.

"I mean, how well do we  _ really  _ know him?" Ben grumbled, basting the ribs he was cooking in more sauce.

"We've known Bobby since he was a kid," Sue said, rolling her eyes as she chopped lettuce for a salad. "He's a nice young man. Honestly I've been expecting Johnny to bring him home ever since he came out."

"Am I really that predictable?" Johnny asked.

"I meant that you and Bobby have always gotten along really well," Sue explained. "He came out before you, so I figured the two of you would at least talk at some point."

"The similarities between the two of you are actually quite fascinating," Reed said. "Considering the differences in your powers, I wonder if you two are unconsciously trying to achieve some kind of thermodynamic balance. It would be quite interesting if that were the case."

"Please don't try to science my relationship," Johnny groaned. "At least not in front of him. I want him to think we're at least somewhat normal."

Ben barked out a laugh. "Pretty sure that ship's sailed a long time ago matchstick. You should just be glad you found someone willin' to tolerate our kinda crazy."

Johnny sighed. "Well at least he at least somewhat knows what to expect. Just please don't embarrass me."

"So the story about the time you were three and ran away from a bath to run up the street buck naked is off the table?" Sue asked, schooling her expression into inquisitive innocence, even though her eyes shined with mischievous cunning.

" _ Absolutely  _ off the table," Johnny said, already flushing. "No naked toddler stories, no matter how cute you  _ think  _ they are."

"Everyone has naked toddler stories," Sue said. "I bet money Bobby's parents have tons of them on him as well."

"Ooh, actually, serious for a sec," Johnny said. "Don't bring up Bobby's parents. He's not on good terms with them."

"Why's that?" Ben asked.

"They just disagree on some stuff," Johnny said. "Like mutants and gay people."

Ben grumbled. "And you want these people to be  _ our  _ in laws?"

Johnny rolled his eyes. "We've been dating a week, it's  _ way  _ too early to be talking about in laws," he said. "Besides, Bobby's  _ family  _ is the X-Men, and we already know them. They're just as crazy as we are."

"That's true," Sue said, mixing the salad together. "We should invite Storm over some time, or at least call her."

The doorbell rang a half an hour later while they were setting the table. Johnny let Bobby up and then went to greet him at the door. Bobby had dressed up nicely for dinner and brought a bottle of wine.

"Hey," he said, sheepish for some reason. "You look nice."

"Thanks, so do you," Johnny said, waving him inside. "We're just getting the table set now. Ben made ribs."

"Great, nice and messy and easy to slop on yourself," Bobby said dryly.

Johnny chuckled. "I think that's why he made it to be honest."

Sue appeared around the corner. "Bobby, so nice to see you," she said, walking up and giving him a quick hug. "How have you been?"

"I've been great," Bobby said. He flushed slightly and held out the wine. "I uh, brought a bottle of wine, but I kind of accidentally froze it."

It was then that Johnny noticed that the 'bottle' of wine Bobby had brought was actually a frozen chunk of wine in the  _ shape _ of a bottle, no glass to be seen. "Are you okay? You didn't cut yourself did you?"

"No no, I'm fine," Bobby insisted, showing his hands to prove it. "I was in my ice form when it happened. I unconsciously switch sometimes when I'm nervous."

"You don't have to be nervous Bobby, we already like you," Sue said. "Why don't we go find something to put it in so it can melt?"

Bobby followed Sue to the kitchen, Johnny right behind them. Ben was pulling the ribs out of the oven and looked up when they entered. "Well you clean up nice at least," he said, setting the rack down to cool.

"Ben," Sue warned, walking passed him to get a pitcher out from the cupboard. "Be nice."

"It was a  _ compliment _ , it was nice," Ben insisted. "You thirsty kid? Let me make you a drink."

"No, I'm alright, thank you though," Bobby said.

"Nonsense, you need a drink," Ben said, heading to the liquor cabinet. "What's your poison? Whiskey fan?"

"I'll just have a soda," Bobby said.

Ben raised an eyebrow but went to the fridge to dig out a can of soda. Instead of handing the can to Bobby, he took out a glass and poured it in. "Here you go," he said, handing it to Bobby. There was something in his eye Johnny didn't quite trust. His suspicion was confirmed when Ben spoke again. "Whoops, forgot the ice, silly me."

"I don't need ice," Bobby said, but Ben had already moved to the freezer.

Ben scooped up two ice cubes in his hand, and Johnny noticed they were the round kind, the ones that went into fancy drinks. Ben took the glass back from Bobby despite his protests and grinned at him as he crushed the balls of ice into the drink in his giant stone fist.

"There you go, crushed ice in a soda," Ben said, handing the glass back to Bobby. "Nice and refreshing."

Bobby took the glass wordlessly and Johnny buried his face in his hands, already planning to fill Ben's shoes with shaving cream. Ben gave Bobby a pat on the shoulder. "Nice to have you for dinner Bob," he said, then took the plate of ribs to the dining room.

"Ignore him," Johnny said once he was mostly out of earshot. "Like I said, he's just being a protective jerk."

"Consider me intimidated," Bobby said, setting aside the glass of soda.

Johnny smiled, but couldn't help the spike of anxiety impaling his stomach. "It's not too late to bail if you don't want to do this. I'm sure we can make up some kind of excuse. An X-Men emergency in Cancun or something. I guess it  _ is  _ a little early to be doing all this—"

"Hey hey, stop that," Bobby said, placing his hands on Johnny's waist and knocking their foreheads together. "I  _ want  _ to be here Johnny. I want to sit down and meet your family even though I've met them before. I want to listen to them tell embarrassing stories about you and sit awkwardly while you make in-jokes with them. I know how important your family is to you, and I'll gladly sit through one of the strongest people on the planet threatening to crush me in order to do this properly. I'm a big boy, I can handle a little threat to my life."

Johnny smiled, feeling like he was about to burst. He tilted his head and pressed a kiss to Bobby's cool lips, trying to pour as much of that feeling into it as possible. By the way Bobby sighed into the kiss, he figured it came across.

Someone cleared their throat and they broke apart. Reed had stretched his neck into the kitchen. "Dinner's ready," he said.

Johnny flushed. "Thanks Reed, we'll be right in."

"Take your time," Reed said, badly hiding a grin. He disappeared back through the door, leaving Johnny and Bobby alone.

Johnny felt his flush deepen as Bobby chuckled. Bobby pressed a kiss to Johnny's heated cheek. "Shall we?" he said.

Johnny looked at Bobby and gave him one last kiss. "Last chance to back out," he offered.

Bobby scoffed. "Come on," he said, taking Johnny's hand and walking with him into the dining room. Johnny squeezed his hand, the overwhelming warmth in his chest returning, making him feel excited and content all at once.

* * *

Janet Van Dyne was a hard woman to book a meeting with. She was in high demand in the fashion world  _ and _ in the superhero world, making it nearly impossible to catch her at a good time. Johnny had tried several times to talk to her after a battle, but she was difficult to spot in a crowd, especially with all the dust and debris floating around. Johnny had also attempted to make an appointment the usual way through her management team, but after the third time getting the runaround and told that her next available appointment was two whole months away, he decided to take matters into his own hands.

Desperate times called for desperate measures.

Jan hardly looked up as Johnny barged into her studio. "You know, it's probably not a good idea to walk in unannounced on a superhero,” she said. “ _ Especially  _ one holding scissors."

"You'd think that, and yet to this day I remain unstabbed," Johnny said, sauntering over to her work table. "How are you doing Jan? Busy?"

" _ Very _ ," Jan said. "So you better make whatever you're here about fast before I toss you out."

“You wouldn’t toss me out, you love me too much,” Johnny said, leaning a hip against the worktable, heedless of Jan side eyeing him.

“You want to test that?” she asked.

"I need an outfit," Johnny declared rather than answer. “A Janet Van Dyne original.”

"You  _ have  _ outfits," Jan said, carefully cutting through some pattern paper. "That one on Instagram last week was really nice by the way. That colour coat looked very nice on you."

"Thank you, and that's not what I meant," Johnny said. "You should know better than to think any number of outfits would ever be enough."

The corner of Jan's mouth quirked up. "True, that one’s on me," she said. "What do you need Johnny?"

Johnny grinned. "The MET Gala, I need one of your designs."

Jan finally looked up at him, raising an eyebrow. "The MET Gala? That's  _ months  _ away. And doesn't the FF have a stylist?" she asked. "He's really good, you guys looked amazing last year."

"He  _ is _ good, and we did look amazing," Johnny said. "But that was last year and  _ this _ year is different. I want you to design my outfit this year."

Jan made another cut in her paper. "Not that I'm not flattered, you know I love dressing you, but why me? I can think of a dozen different designers who would beg at your feet for the chance to design for your MET Gala outfit."

Johnny gave her a deadpan stare. "Did you really just ask me that Jan?  _ Really _ ? Gee Jan, I don't know, why  _ would _ I be asking the best designer in New York City—in the  _ world _ —someone who has  _ years _ of experience working for people with superpowers and making them look  _ amazing _ , for one of her pieces? Wow, that’s a real head scratcher right there.”

Jan chuckled. “Flattery will get you everywhere,” she said. “Alright, so you want me, and for you, I can squeeze something in.”

“That’s why I came so early,” Johnny said. “So you’d have a lot of time to get it perfect.”

“My designs are perfect no matter what, but I appreciate the consideration,” Jan said. “Did you have anything in mind? What’s the theme anyway? Have they even announced it yet?”

“They haven’t announced it yet, but I know a girl who knows a guy who knows someone on the inside who knows all the juicy little secrets,” Johnny said. “And I know that they’re going to announce that the theme this year is ‘Cosmic’.”

“Ooh, I like that,” Jan said. “And it’s perfect for you and your family. It’s like it was made for you.”

“Well, Sue might have made a big donation this year, but you didn’t hear that from me,” Johnny said. “And yes, I did have a few things in mind, but I figured I would let the master work her magic.”

“I appreciate your trust,” Jan said. “Alright, since you’re already here because you barged in unannounced, let's go over some of your ideas. What have you got for me?”

Johnny grinned ear to ear and proceeded to outline the general idea of what he wanted. He had some idea of who he wanted it to look, but he also did trust Jan to come up with something amazing. She’d never disappointed with her designs before, and just was sure she wasn’t about to start now.

Jan listened attentively, jumping in with suggestions from time to time until they had a rough idea of what Johnny was looking for. “This is going to be so much fun,” Jan said, scribbling down notes on a piece of scrap paper. “I’ll pencil out some designs and get back to you with a few different versions.”

“Take your time, we’re not rushing,” Johnny said.

“With the kind of things you have in mind, we’re going to need all the time I can spare,” Jan said, tapping her lip with the pencil. “Honestly, you should have come to me as soon as possible, I just  _ know _ we’re going to screw this up a couple times.”

“Well I  _ tried _ to get in touch with you sooner, but your assistant told me you weren’t available for appointments until next month at least,” Johnny pouted.

“Atta girl,” Jan said, grinning. “Not impressed or swayed by bigshot superheros in the slightest.”

Johnny chuckled. “Yeah it was like talking to a wall. I could not get past her for the life of me. I had to sneak by when she went to the bathroom.”

“That’s why I hired her,” Jan said. “You know she did the same thing to Tony once? Sent him packing with his tail between his legs. He had Hank call me so he could steal the phone and whine about it.”

Johnny snorted. “Honestly Tony could stand to be knocked down a peg or two,” he said.

“Says the man who barged in here after sneaking around like a burglar,” Jan said, poking him in the side with her pencil. She picked up her scissors and started cutting her paper again. “So what’s different?”

“Different?” Johnny asked.

"What's different about this year?" Jan asked. “You said this year was special, but you never mentioned why.”

Johnny paused for a moment, slightly blindsided. He’d been having so much fun talking with Jan about all the fun things he wanted to try out with this design that he’d almost forgotten the reason he’d known he’d needed to get Jan on board for this. Sure, Johnny was a hot ticket in the fashion world right now, everyone wanted him for their projects, but none of them had her experience working with superpowers. None of them  _ knew _ Johnny like she did, none of them would get it.

“Johnny?” Jan asked.

"It's the first year I'll be attending as an out man," Johnny explained, the words tumbling out in a rush.

Jan paused in her cutting. "Oh Johnny," she sighed, setting down her scissors.

"The MET Gala is one of the biggest events of the year," Johnny continued, wanting to explain, to make her understand. "Like sure, some people keep up with the society pages, but the MET Gala gets seen by  _ everyone _ . This will the first big event I'll be at as an out gay man. I want it… I need it to be  _ perfect _ ."

Jan smiled up at him, but he kept going, a nervous babbling he couldn't stop. "You know why they call it 'coming out'? It's not just a closet metaphor, they used to hold like, balls and galas at gay clubs where people would 'debut' in gay society for the first time. They'd dress up and they'd dance and have all kinds of fun coming out and joining a community that accepted them," Johnny explained. "And like, I came out, I've been out for months, and I'm dating Bobby and it's been great and everything is great, I just… I want this year to be  _ extra  _ special, you know?"

Jan reached out and put her hand on his arm, smiling up at him. "I understand Johnny," she said.

Johnny smiled down at her, covering her hand with his own. “I knew you would,” he said. “That’s why I knew I needed you for this. There’s no one else I trust to make this absolutely  _ perfect _ .”

Jan smiled up at him, eyes bright. “I promise I won’t fail you Johnny. I’ll make this Gala unforgettable for  _ years _ to come.”

Johnny laughed. “Thanks Jan, I knew I could count on you.”

Jan beamed up at him, then turned back to her work. “Well, as fun as it was to chat with you, I  _ really _ do have to get this done. I’ll have Erin pencil you in for a brunch or something so we can talk more about it. This will take a lot of planning and probably a few false starts.”

“Text me to let me know,” Johnny said. “I’m going to jump out your window instead of try to sneak past your assistant again.”

“Smart call,” Jan said, picking up her scissors once again.

“I’ll see you around Jan,” Johnny said, leaning down to kiss her cheek before heading for the windows. “Love you, bye!” he called over his shoulder as he flamed on and dove out the window, arching into the sky.

* * *

Johnny’s dinner with the X-Men somehow went considerably worse and better than Bobby’s dinner with the Four.

“Do rogue Sentinels always crash dinner or is this a special occasion?” Johnny asked, lobbing fireballs at robotic eyes.

“I wouldn't say they  _ always _ crash dinner,” Bobby said, “but it happens every now and then. Sorry.”

“No need to say sorry, I was genuinely surprised when an interdimensional sinkhole didn’t open up in the dining room when you were at my family’s dinner,” Johnny said.

“Honestly? So was I,” Bobby confessed, sliding passed and freezing a Sentinel’s legs together so it toppled over.

Johnny sniggered, swooping around to melt off a metal arm. He was actually doing quite well, all things considered. It might have had to do with the fact that Johnny wasn't a mutant, and therefore the Sentinels weren’t targeting him. It was easier to fight something that wasn’t even paying attention to you.

That’s not to say Johnny didn’t need to keep his guard up. The Sentinels were big and nasty, equipped with all kinds of ways to combat a range of powers. Though Johnny wasn't being targeted, some of the Sentinels were pretty thoroughly fireproof, which was causing Johnny a little bit of frustration. He was also unused to working with the X-Men without the rest of his team there, so he was constantly having to dodge around people.

Johnny swore as he ducked around Wolverine, flying through the air after being hurled by Colossus at a Sentinel’s face. Unfortunately that put him in the way of Storm’s gust of wind, snuffling out his flames and blowing him off course. He tumbled down towards the ground, unable to get his bearing enough to right himself.

There was a loud ‘bamf’ noise and a strange lurching sensation, as well as the quickly fading smell of sulfur. Strong arms wrapped around Johnny and after a moment he realized he wasn't falling through the air anymore, but safely on the ground. He steadied himself and looked up into a concerned blue face.

“Are you alright, Herr Storm?” Nightcrawler asked, brows knitting together and tilting his head slightly.

Johnny had known Nightcrawler for many years, worked with him professionally for ages, but he’d never actually been this close to him before, and had certainly never been cradled in his arms like this. This close, Johnny could actually see that Kurt was really quite handsome under his startlingly demonish looks. He had sharp,angular features that were—for lack of a better word—almost elvish. His fur looked incredibly soft and velvety, and for a second Johnny wanted to touch it. Kurt’s yellow eyes were framed by thick lashes, and there was something oddly magnetic about them, something that made it difficult to look away.

“Yeah uh, I’m fine,” Johnny said, shaking himself out of his own head. “Just had the wind knocked out of me. Literally.”

Kurt smiled, white fangs flashing behind his lips. “Ah well, so long as you are unhurt, I am relieved. Bobby is very fond of you, and I would hate to see such a close friend saddened by an injury to your person.”

“Right,” Johnny said. He noticed he was still being carried and wondered how strong Kurt was to be able to hold him up so effortlessly.

“Still, that was a nasty tumble you took. Perhaps you should sit aside while we finish here?” Kurt asked. There was a shriek of metal slicing against metal. “Besides, I believe Logan has things in hand.”

“Okay,” Johnny said, expecting to be put down and feeling oddly sad about it. To his surprise, Nightcrawler carried him further away from the battle and carefully laid him down so he was sitting on the steps of the school.

“Rest here a moment Herr Storm, I will find Bobby for you,” Kurt said, standing up and flashing him another grin. Johnny really hoped there was no one with super hearing around that could hear his heart speed up.

“Uh, think he found us,” Johnny said, noticing Bobby running towards them.

“Johnny!” Bobby called as he reached them. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” Johnny said. “Just got blown ass over teakettle a little. I’ll be fine.”

Bobby breathed a sigh of relief. “Oh thank goodness. I saw you fall and nearly had a heart attack.”

Johnny waved him away. “I’m fine, I’ve had worse sparring with Ben,” he said. “Falls like that are only bad when you land, and luckily I got caught before I hit the ground.”

“Happy to be of service,” Nightcrawler said, giving an exaggerated little bow. “I’ll leave you to play nurse Bobby, I should get back to see if Logan needs to be pulled out of a crater again.”

“I think he’s stuck inside a Sentinel head actually,” Bobby said.

Kurt sighed, grumbling something in German as he walked away, tail flicking around in annoyance. Johnny couldn't help but watch him go, slightly entranced by the smoothness of his movements, the grace in every line of his body. It was easy to see his history as an acrobat in the way he moved.

Johnny nudged Bobby. “Hey so remember when you said you’d date Nightcrawler if you could?”

Bobby raised an eyebrow. “Yeah?”

“I totally get it now.”

“ _ Right _ !?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me, desperately shoving my giant crush on Nightcrawler under the bed: Nothing to see here folks.


	11. Part II.ii: Meteorite

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took so much longer than it should have. I had most of this chapter already finished by the time I had the other chapter up, literally I only had to finish the last scene, but working at home has super messed with my productivity. Here's hoping the next chapters will come more easily.

"So Morris, we've known each other for a long time, right?"

Hydro-Man let out a bellow of rage as Spider-Man twisted away from his watery grip. Peter would consider that a 'yes'. He landed on the side of a building and started crawling up, trying to get Hydro-Man to stretch himself thin.

"What am I saying, of course we've known each other for a long time, I was there when we met," Peter said, slinging away down the street. "I remember it like it was yesterday. The open ocean, the sweltering heat, the murderous intent in your eyes, so romantic."

"I'm gonna kill you!" Morris shouted, blasting out a jet of water to try and knock Spider-Man off of his webline.

Peter had to do a complicated twisting motion that made something stretch weird in his leg in order to avoid getting hit. Oh to be young and elastic again. "See, you know how to keep the spark alive. Now Vulture,  _ whoof _ , talk about a stale relationship. At least Mysterio  _ tries  _ to surprise me once in a while."

Peter's spider-sense had him moving before he even noticed the tidal wave of water and debris heading for him. "Anyway, I'm getting off track. So we've known each other a long time, right? You mind if I ask you a question? I'm in the market for some advice."

"Here's some advice," Morris growled. "Hold still!"

"Now what would the fun in that be?" Peter said, skittering across the side of the building. He had to be careful with windows, or Morris's water would pick up shards of glass. "I mean I've got to do my part to keep things interesting as well. Relationships are about give and take. We both have to contribute."

"I'll contribute to your funeral by providing your corpse," Hydro-Man snarled. He was starting to wear himself thin, which was just what Peter needed. He just had to keep talking for a while longer.

"That's the spirit," Peter said, swinging a fallen lamppost around to slam through Hydro-Man's torso, giving him a minute of reprieve. "So as I was saying, I'm looking for some advice. See, I've got this…  _ friend _ ."

Peter felt his stomach twist in a way that had nothing to do with the looping acrobatics he did to keep out of Hydro-Man's blasts. It felt like a bit of a disservice to call Johnny just a 'friend', but Peter didn't have the proper word to describe his relationship to Johnny. They'd known each other for so long, 'friend' didn't seem to capture the depth or breadth of all they'd been through together. But it was the word that fit the closest, so Peter would stick to it for now.

Ha, 'stick' to it. He was so hilarious.

"So this 'friend' and I, we're close," Peter continued, dodging as he talked. "We've known each other as long as I've been in this gig, and I don't know where I'd be without him."

This was true enough. It was Johnny that had inspired Peter to pick the mask back up when he'd felt like giving up. When Peter had been reeling from Gwen's death, it had been Johnny who'd made him feel like himself again. When Johnny had been trapped in the Negative Zone—dead for all that Peter knew—it had nearly shattered Peter. What would he do without Johnny?

"Recently this friend of mine has started dating another person I also consider a friend," Peter explained, launching a manhole cover at Morris, slicing off a section of his arm. "And like, I thought my whole issue was that my friend wasn't hanging around good people. I was kind of a jerk about it, but I maintain that I was  _ right _ ."

"God, do you ever  _ shut up _ ?" Morris growled. He swept up a car and launched it at Spider-Man.

Peter caught the car with a grunt, trying not to slip on the wet ground. He tossed the car back at Hydro-Man, glad that it was one of those little mini Coopers. "But now he's dating my other friend, and I can't help but feel all  _ weird  _ about it."

Since Johnny had started dating Bobby, Peter had tried his best to be happy for them. They seemed like they were working well together, and Peter couldn't remember the last time he'd seen Johnny so happy in a relationship. Yet something dark and ugly made its home in Peter's chest every time he thought about them together. It stuck to him like tar, and no matter what Peter did he couldn't get it off of him. It had gotten worse when Johnny and Bobby had officially become a couple. Peter put on a happy face for Johnny, but all he wanted to do was scream.

"It's so stupid, he's a great guy, but I can't stop thinking it would be better if they broke up," Peter said sullenly. "Am I the asshole here?"

Peter's spider-sense blared and he looked up to see another car sailing towards him. It was another small one, so he simply caught it like the last one, grunting at the impact. Before Peter could correct his balance, a flood of water slammed into him from behind, knocking him over. It was all he could do to take a deep breath and toss the car aside so it didn't crush him. The wave dragged him across the pavement, slamming him headfirst into all kinds of debris. Disoriented, Peter thrashed against the current, trying to find purchase. He knocked into the edge of something metal and felt the sting of his flesh slicing open.

Cursing internally, Peter twisted around and stuck to the ground under him, crawling along for all he was worth. He managed to reach a lamppost and shimmied up it, coughing and spluttering and trying to get his bearings. His spider-sense screamed and he turned a fraction too late, noticing the wall of water just as it was about to crash down on him.

_ Shit _ .

Peter braced himself, gripping the lamppost hard enough to dent the metal to try and keep from being swept away. He hoped that he didn't get slammed into anything that would knock him out. Broken bones would heal, but if he went unconscious, he would drown before he could even fight back.

Inches before contact, the wall froze,  _ literally _ . Ice traveled up the flow of water, heedless of Hydro-Man's bellows of rage. Morris swung around, swatting at something, but he was quickly frozen solid. Within a few seconds, Hydro-Man was completely immobilized, no longer a threat to innocent people and less-innocent spiders.

Peter blinked, still slightly dizzy and not sure what had just transpired. His question was answered when a familiar figure slid into his vision on an ice slide. He wondered if he might still be able to drown as Iceman slid up next to him.

"Hey man, you okay?" Iceman asked. "That looked like that was a really hard hit."

Peter was saved from answering by a coughing fit, trying to expel the last of the water from his lungs. He lifted his mask enough to spit the water out. "I'm fine," he croaked.

"Yeah sure. You know you're bleeding?" Bobby asked. "You need me to call someone?"

Peter waved him away. "It's not too deep, it'll heal up," he said. He looked over at the frozen visage of Hydro-Man, face twisted in rage. It wouldn't last forever, Morris would be back eventually, but it was a cool day, so it would hold until the special forces could be called in to cart him away until the next time he broke out.

"Thanks for the assist," Peter said.

"No problem," Bobby said, smiling brightly. "I don't normally step in, but I saw you go down and figured I could help."

"Right," Peter said. If Bobby hadn't stepped in, Peter would probably be a bug-shaped watery smear on the wall. He knew he should be grateful for Bobby's help, pleased even, but that dark ugly feeling in his gut was making it difficult. All he could think about was how much it bothered him that Bobby was dating Johnny.

"You gonna hang out until the police get here?" Bobby asked. "I don't want to risk this guy unfreezing, but I'm going to split the moment the fuzz shows up. Don't want to get the rap for the property damage."

Peter thought about swinging off, avoiding Bobby so he didn't have to confront whatever weird feelings this whole situation evoked in him, but he knew that would only get him so far. Eventually Johnny would insist that they all get together to hang out. Peter should just get used to being around Bobby.

"Yeah I'll stay," Peter said. "Cops should be here soon anyway."

"Cool," Bobby said. "Want to grab some pizza after? It's been a while since we talked."

"Sure why not?" Peter said, forcing the viciousness out of his tone. Hopefully it would just be passed off as Spider-Man being testy from his injuries.

The boys in blue finally showed up and they fled the scene, leaving the mess for someone else to clean up. Peter hung out on a roof nursing his split open shoulder while Bobby got them some pizza. The cut ran from the far point of his shoulder and ran down across his shoulder blade towards his spine. It wasn't deep and probably didn't need stitches, but it stung like the dickens and made his shoulder stiff and achy.

"What's the verdict?" Bobby asked when he returned with the box. "We need to amputate anything?"

"Just my pride for getting clocked like that," Peter said, digging into the box for a slice. "I mean, having a fast one pulled on me by Hydro-Man? Not my finest hour."

"Yeah I hear that," Bobby said. "I once got my ass handed to me by  _ Toad _ ."

"The humiliation hurts worse than the bruises," Peter commiserated sullenly. He scarfed down his first slice and reached for a second.

They chatted for a while and Peter began to relax. He remembered why he liked Bobby, the guy was genuinely fun to hang around with. There weren't a lot of people in their line of work who knew what it was like to start out as a teenager and grow up doing what they did. It had probably messed them up in the head somehow, now that Peter thought about it.

However, even as they talked and Peter enjoyed himself, there were still the persisting feelings churning in his gut like bad ravioli. Peter would suddenly remember that Bobby was dating Johnny, and it would make his blood boil for a second until he got it under control. What did Johnny see in Bobby? He knew they were similar and got along well, but something about the match didn't sit right with Peter. Maybe this was the perfect time to investigate why.

"So you and Johnny huh?" Peter asked.

Bobby's eyes lit up with excitement. "Yeah! We've been dating for a couple weeks now," he said. "Did he mention it?"

"He's mentioned it," Peter said, ripping his pizza crust apart. "Can hardly shut up about it actually."

It had actually started getting annoying, how much Johnny had been talking about Bobby. Ever since they'd made it official, Peter had been hearing all about it every time he hung out with Johnny. He'd seemed so excited to talk about it, and Peter had hated to burst his bubble, so he'd put on a smile and listen attentively, even though it was the last thing he wanted to hear about it.

Bobby went a little pink across the cheeks. "Really? That much? Wow," he said. "I mean, I know  _ I _ can't stop talking about it, but it's neat to hear he's the same way."

_ Oh great _ , Peter thought. Now he was going to get it from Bobby as well. "Yeah he's really excited to have his first boyfriend," he said. "It's been a while since his last relationship."

"Yeah he said," Bobby said. "It's a little daunting. I feel like I'm under pressure to get it  _ right _ , you know? Especially for Johnny."

"Why especially?" Peter asked.

"Well… he's  _ Johnny _ ," Bobby said, his flush deepening.

Peter raised an eyebrow. Was Bobby using Johnny for his fame, like all the other people who flocked to him? It didn't seem like him, but Peter guessed he couldn't be too careful. It probably wasn't a good idea to jump down his throat about it just yet though, better to gather more information first.

"Yeah, he certainly is," Peter said. "I mean, who hasn't thought about it? The fame, the money, the cars. He's a catch."

"Well yeah, all of that," Bobby said, and Peter could feel the heat rising up his neck, but Bobby continued. "But I mean, I don't really care about that stuff. That celebrity stuff? That's not Johnny, not really."

Peter felt the heat fizzle out, replaced by something ice cold. "No, it's really not," he said softly.

Bobby got a far off, gentle look in his eyes. "I've known Johnny for a long time, since we were kids, and I've always liked him. I think there was always a part of me that had a bit of a crush on him." He flushed a little. "Kind of hard not to, he's always been so attractive."

Peter would be lying if he didn't get what Bobby was talking about. Throughout the years, Johnny had always been unfairly gorgeous, seeming to skip right over the awkward teenage years and go straight into being an absolute stunner. He'd stayed consistently beautiful throughout his life, something that had annoyed Peter to no end at first. It hadn't seemed fair for Johnny to have it all when Peter had so little. The universe couldn't have offset the fame and fortune and the proximity to Peter's childhood hero Reed Richards by making Johnny a butterface?

"When I heard about Johnny coming out, I was so excited," Bobby said. "Not just because I was hopeful, but because he and I were so similar. The way we'd both come out so late in our lives, after spending so long trying to be something we weren't, I was excited to have a friend who  _ got it _ , you know?"

Peter nodded. "Yeah," he said. "Johnny's always been really easy to talk to."

"He is, he's so attentive," Bobby said. "Sometimes I feel like I could just talk with him for hours. He's so sweet."

The cold feeling in Peter's gut intensified. "Yeah, I know we're always losing track of time talking to each other."

"He's also so caring," Bobby said. "He'd drop everything in a heartbeat to help someone he cares about. Sometimes I actually get a little worried that he's  _ too _ nice and he won't take care of himself before others. I'm worried he'll rush into something and get himself hurt."

Peter closed his eyes for a second, remembering when he'd gotten the news about Johnny's apparent death, how he'd sacrificed himself to save Ben. When Johnny loved you, he loved you with  _ intensity _ , and Peter knew he'd do anything to keep the people he loved safe. "He worries me too sometimes," Peter said quietly.

They went quiet for a moment, each of them wrapped up in their own thoughts about Johnny. Peter would do anything for the people he cared about as well, but there were times Johnny seemed almost eager to sacrifice himself. Peter wondered sometimes what Johnny thought of himself to act like the world would ever recover without him in it.

"I was really happy when he said yes to dating," Bobby said after a few minutes of silence. "Despite how nerve wracking it is, I'm really happy. Johnny's… he's just  _ special _ , you know?"

Peter's heart twisted.  _ Oh no _ , he thought,  _ he's in love with Johnny _ .

It was such a strange thought to have, Bobby being in love with Johnny. Realistically it was the best case scenario for Johnny, someone who loved him and wanted to be with him. There was nothing Johnny wanted more in his life than to be loved by someone, and here was Bobby, a great person who Peter considered a friend, practically shouting from the rooftops how much he loved Johnny. It should have filled Peter with joy, to know that Johnny finally had a person that would treat him right. Peter should have been ecstatic for his friends.

All he could think about was shoving Bobby off the roof.

_ You're being irrational _ , Peter thought to himself.  _ Bobby's an amazing guy and Johnny is lucky. Stop doing this to yourself _ .

"You guys seem like you're good together," Peter said genuinely. "Johnny's been through a lot, he deserves someone who can give him everything."

Bobby smiled, bright and happy. "Well I'm certainly going to try my best," he said.

Peter pulled his mask down so he didn't have to force a smile back. "I should probably get going," he said.

"Alright," Bobby said, not seeming to notice anything amiss. "It was nice talking to you, we should hang out more."

"Absolutely," Peter said. Before he could do or say anything stupid, he shot out a webline and swung off, leaving Bobby on the rooftop.

Peter's shoulder screamed at him—he really should have rested it for longer—but he kept swinging, trying to keep his head clear. It was good that Bobby and Johnny liked each other, Peter reminded himself. How often had he watched Johnny date someone, knowing that the other person was only interested in the Human Torch, not Johnny himself? He'd kept his mouth shut then, let Johnny live his life the way he wanted, why did he all of a sudden want to butt in?

_ Because Johnny was dating  _ **_women_ ** _ back then _ , Peter thought.  _ Now that he's dating a man, you suddenly have a problem with it _ .

This was starting to get absurd. Peter had never once in his life ever had an issue with gay people until now. Until it was  _ Johnny  _ that was gay. It didn't even seem tied to the fact that Johnny was gay—when Johnny had come out to him at first, Peter had been fine. Peter had been  _ happy  _ for Johnny. He'd genuinely enjoyed seeing Johnny start to live his life free to be himself.

Then all of a sudden Peter had started losing his mind. Seeing Johnny with strange men, seeing how those men  _ treated  _ Johnny—all those bruises vicious marks—it had made Peter's blood boil. He'd thought it was just that, the unsavory quality of the men Johnny went home with, but now it was  _ Bobby _ , one of the more well-adjusted X-Men. Bobby seemed to genuinely care about Johnny, and Johnny in turn was happy with Bobby. By all accounts, Peter should have been happy for both of them.

_ But I'm not _ , Peter thought sullenly.  _ I think about them being together and I just feel miserable _ .

It made no sense in the slightest, but it was true. There was something about the idea of Johnny spending the rest of his life with Bobby that made Peter feel ill. He hated the thought, he hated himself more for having it. Johnny deserved to be happy, and if Bobby made him happy, why couldn't Peter accept that?

It's almost as if he was jeal—

Peter's spider-sense blared, cutting off his train of thought. He jerked on the end of his webline, narrowly avoiding a blast of sticky paste. He landed on a flagpole and whipped his head around, searching for the source. A figure moved on the rooftop across the street.

"Say your prayers Spider-Man!" Trapster shouted, aiming his stupid glue gun again. Peter leapt into the air, easily avoiding the spray of adhesive.

_ Perfect _ , Peter thought.  _ Some stupid thug to beat the hell out of. Just what the doctor ordered _ .

Peter took his time chasing down and scaring the crap out of Trapster, relishing making the poor bastard work for his defeat. By the time Peter finally took him down, hanging him up a lamppost to be cut down whenever someone got around to it, he felt loads better. He didn't quite remember what he was thinking when he'd been attacked, but he chalked it up to the blow to the head earlier.

_ If it was important, I'll figure it out eventually _ , Peter thought, giving Trapster one last spin before swinging away.

* * *

Peter was not figuring it out at all.

The more time passed, the longer Johnny and Bobby dated, the more Peter felt like he was losing his mind. No matter what he did, he just couldn't seem to get used to the idea. He felt like he was constantly waiting for the news that Bobby and Johnny had broken up, which in turn made him feel like a garbage friend to both of them. Every time he saw them together, that horrible feeling in his stomach intensified, even so many weeks later.

Peter had tried to ignore it, that nasty feeling in his stomach whenever he saw Johnny and Bobby together, but it was difficult. It seemed to bubble up from deep inside of him where he couldn't get to, couldn't scrape it out of his head to examine. He considered for a moment that he was going  _ legitimately  _ crazy, but he quickly dismissed the idea. If he was crazy, he'd have to deal with that, and he didn't think he wanted to deal with that. Better to ignore it as best he could and hope it went away eventually.

So far it didn't seem to be fading any time soon. On the first snowfall of the year, good old Doc Doom decided to throw a tantrum for some reason or another and flooded the city with Doombots. Normally the Fantastic Four would have dealt with it on their own, but a portal the size of several city blocks had opened up for the Doombots to rush through, making it an all hands on deck sort of situation.

Spider-Man had been happily tearing his way through a crowd of Doombots when a streak of fire flew past. "Watch it flame brain!" he called. "You're supposed to set the robots on fire, not spiders!"

"Sorry webhead," Johnny said, melting a couple Doombots. "You're both so ugly, it's hard to tell the difference."

"Har har, you're just  _ so  _ funny," Peter said. "You can't tell under this mask, but I'm rolling my eyes at you."

Johnny gasped dramatically. "Oh no! Not rolling your  _ eyes _ ! How will I ever recover from such a slight?"

Peter grinned. "You say that, and yet you always seem to return to annoy me some more," he said. He webbed two Doombots together and watched them tear each other apart trying to get free. "Any idea what crawled up Vic's ass today?"

"Not a clue, but from the way Reed was mumbling to himself and shaking his head, I'd guess it's some kind of anniversary or something," Johnny said, ducking and weaving out of the way of a blast. "Actually, you know what? It might be the reunion."

"Reunion?" Peter asked, catching one bot on the end of a webline and swinging it around to crash into the others.

"Reed got an invitation to his alumni reunion at State,” Johnny explained. “If Vic got wind of it, that might be why he's throwing a hissy fit."

"I guess he'd be mad about not getting an invite?" Peter mused. "Did he even graduate? Is he just calling himself a doctor without the necessary qualifications?"

"He's a tyrannical autocrat hell-bent on destroying my brother-in-law and ruling the world, I don't really care what qualifications he has," Johnny said.

"I'm just saying, at least Doctor Strange is an actual MD. He's not just running around calling himself a doctor without actually  _ earning  _ that title," Peter said. "Which brings me to another point, why is it 'Mister' Fantastic and not 'Doctor' Fantastic? Reed's got like, seven PhD's."

"I don't know, ask him about it," Johnny said. He lured a few Doombots into the air and then fried them when they got too close. "You could ask the same thing about Tony. He's got a bunch of PhD's too, but he still goes by 'Mister' Stark."

"Yeah put Tony's a  _ yutz _ though," Peter said. He grunted as a Doombot managed to corner him and two others took the opportunity to dog pile him. The problem with Doombots wasn't that they were hard to deal with, but that there were so many of them.

"Need and assist?" Johnny asked, looping down low enough that Peter could start to feel the heat coming from him.

"Nah, I'm—oof—I'm good," Peter said, throwing off the bots. He lashed out with a wild punch, landing it right against a metal cheek hard enough to spin the robot's whole head around.

It happened very fast after that.

The Doombot beeped a few times, seemingly confused as to why it was now facing the wrong way around. It must have had enough juice left in it to recognize the Human Torch, flying close enough to be in range. With one last shrill alarm noise, it let loose some kind of energy beam from its eyes, catching Johnny off guard and hitting him squarely in the chest. Johnny's flames snuffed out and he dropped like a stone, hitting the pavement with a sickening thud.

" _ Johnny _ !"

For a split second, Peter was sure it was him who screamed. It must have been him, the raw emotion in the voice matched perfectly with the absolute terror he felt in his soul. A moment after that he realized that it wasn't him, there was no way it could be him because his heart and tried to evict itself from his chest via his throat, getting stuck somewhere hear his larynx and jamming everything up, leaving him unable to make a sound.

The question of 'if it wasn't me who screamed, then who was it?' was answered a second later when the entire section of street they'd been fighting on suddenly froze, frost climbing up the buildings and turning the pavement and asphalt into a sheet of slick ice. Doombots froze in place, metal creaking as the temperature suddenly dropped. A few of them warped and shattered with how quickly they froze. Peter barely had time to get clear of anything metal as his spider-sense blared at him. In just a few seconds, the fighting in that section of the street came to a complete standstill.

Peter tried to move towards Johnny, heart still pounding in his throat. He slipped and slid, having a hard time sticking to the ice. By the time he managed to get moving, Bobby had already reached Johnny and was kneeling at his side.

"Johnny!" Bobby cried, panic in his voice. Peter landed next to them just as Johnny groaned and opened his eyes.

"What happened?" Johnny slurred, wheezing with each breath.

Peter's brain conjured images of crushed ribs and punctured lungs. "Don't move firefly, just lay still for a sec," he ordered, trying to keep his voice from shaking.

Johnny groaned again, ignoring Peter and common sense and trying to sit up. Peter swore and reached for him, but Bobby was already there. "Johnny please," he said.

"I'm fine," Johnny grumbled, but he laid back down. "I'm just a little winded."

There was the sound of engines whirring above them and suddenly Reed stretched down from the Fantasticar. "What happened?" he asked.

"Took a direct hit in the chest," Peter explained. "Dropped to the ground like a rock."

"I'm fine," Johnny insisted again.

Reed leaned over Johnny, elongated fingers pressing gently into tender spots. "Do you feel any pain in your chest? Where does it hurt?"

"My shoulder, the one I  _ landed  _ on," Johnny groaned. "I told you, I'm just a little winded. My chest is fine."

Reed finished prodding at Johnny's ribs. "You said you took a direct hit?"

"After Spider-Man nearly ripped it's head off," Johnny said. "I'm guessing it wasn't functioning at full power."

Reed let out a breath. "You're lucky. A concussive blast like that to the chest could have stopped your heart," he said. He leaned over to start examining Johnny's shoulder. "This looks like it might be dislocated, we should get you back to Baxter."

"What about the battle?" Johnny asked.

"Mostly wrapped up, we got the portal closed," Reed said. He glanced around at the frozen Doombots. "Plus, someone took out a significant chunk of the army in one shot."

Johnny looked around, seeming to notice the ice surrounding them for the first time. He looked up at Bobby and raised any eyebrow.

Bobby couldn't blush in his ice form, but the way he ducked his head made Peter guess he could feel the flush anyway. "I saw you go down. I guess I panicked a bit."

Johnny smiled, fond and sweet. He reached up and cupped Bobby's face, stroking his cheek. "My hero," he said, tugging Bobby down for a kiss.

Peter's heart ached.

Bobby took a deep breath and rested his forehead against Johnny's. "Let's get you back to Baxter," he said.

Johnny sighed. "Alright," he said.

Bobby and Reed helped Johnny up, leaving Peter to stand by awkwardly, feeling like a third wheel. He tried to reach for Johnny as he stumbled, but Bobby was already there. Bobby's hand rested at Johnny's waist, supporting him as he listed to the side slightly. Peter had the overwhelming urge to separate them.

"It's okay Spider-Man," Bobby said, smiling at him. "We've got this handled. You can go help with the rest of the Doombots."

Peter felt like socking Bobby in the jaw, anger bubbling up from deep inside of him. How many years had  _ Peter  _ been the one to help Johnny when he was in trouble? What right did Bobby have butting in where he wasn't wanted? What made Bobby think he knew more than Peter about what Johnny needed?

Peter was seconds away from telling Bobby off when he realized what he was doing. "Yeah, right, okay," he said, stepping back. "I'll just… go."

Johnny flashed him a weak smile. "I'll call you later, okay?"

Peter gave a nod, watching as Johnny was put into the back of the Fantasticar, Bobby glued to his side. He stayed silent as Reed flew them away, taking Johnny back to Baxter for medical attention. What had come over Peter, thinking he had more right to Johnny than Bobby did? Yeah he and Johnny were friends, closer friends than Bobby had been with either of them, but Bobby was  _ dating  _ Johnny now. He had just as much right to be by Johnny's side when he got hurt, possibly more.

"Get your shit together man," Peter grumbled to himself. He thwiped out a webline and swung away, eager to take out his frustration with himself on whatever Doombots remained.

* * *

Weeks turned to months, and Peter couldn't seem to improve his attitude around Bobby. He did his best to grin and bare it for Johnny’s sake, but it was starting to fray his nerves a little. No matter what he tried, he couldn’t seem to get comfortable with the idea. It wasn’t anything against Bobby in particular, or at least it had started that way, but more and more Peter could feel himself growing bitter and resentful whenever he thought about Bobby. It seemed like everything Bobby did was annoying and even the smallest things he did would send Peter hurtling off the edge of madness.

There didn’t seem to be any reason for Peter to be so annoyed either. The few times Peter had been around the two of them together, Bobby had been nothing but sweet and attentive to Johnny, making him laugh and giving him just the right amount of attention. If someone asked Peter what sort of person he’d want hanging around Johnny, he probably would have described Bobby. On paper Bobby seemed like the perfect match for Johnny, and Peter knew that, but he couldn't help that ugly little part of him that kept imagining throwing Bobby into the river.

Peter stared down at his phone, glaring at the photo that was just posted to Johnny’s Instagram. It was a terrible cell phone pic of Bobby and Johnny together somewhere on a beach, Johnny’s head thrown back in a laugh as Bobby squeezed him in for the photo. Aside from the clear affront to the weather in New York—which was a balmy below freezing—meaning that they’d gone on some kind of vacation together, the photo irritated Peter in a way he couldn’t put a finger on. The filter that had been slapped over it was an affront to Peter’s professional standards, but not enough to be downright insulting. Overall it wasn’t a horrible photo, but staring at it had Peter fighting the urge to crush his phone in his hand.

There was a snapping sound and Peter was jolted out of his own head. "Earth to Pete, come in Pete, we need you back in the present,” someone said, their fingers snapping in front of his nose again.

Peter shook his head and smiled at his companion, quickly stowing his phone away. "Sorry MJ, I got a little lost."

MJ raised a perfectly sculpted red eyebrow at him. "I noticed. What were you looking at?”

“Just a dumb photo on Instagram,” Peter said.

“Let me see,” MJ demanded, reaching into his pocket to fish out his phone. She had it unlocked before he could snatch it back.

“Stop hacking my phone” he grumbled, making a half-hearted attempt to get it back from her.

“Stop making your password your Aunt’s birthday,” MJ said. She tapped through his phone until she got to Instagram, which was helpfully still on Johnny’s post. “This one? It looks fine.”

Peter rolled his eyes. “Yeah sure, for amature work maybe.”

“Well it’s not like it’s a professional shoot or anything,” MJ said. “It looks nice actually.”

“That’s because it’s impossible to take a bad photo of Johnny. Trust me, I’ve  _ tried _ ,” Peter grumbled. “He’s a freak of nature who doesn't have a bad angle.”

“Being photogenic makes him a freak?” MJ asked.

Peter scoffed. “ _ Everyone _ has a bad angle MJ. Literally every other person on the planet has a bad angle except for him.”

MJ raised an eyebrow at him. “So  _ I _ have a bad angle?” she asked, tone light but razor sharp.

Peter paused for several seconds, wondering how he’d just run head first into this brick wall of a question. “No?” he said, plastering on a wide smile.

MJ hummed and handed him back his phone. “Tabling that for some other time, what’s up with the storm face? Yeah it’s a mediocre photo, but it’s not like that actually bugs you, not really. Something on your mind tiger?"

Peter let out a long sigh, a cloud of fog forming in the cold air. Winter was in full swing, frigid temperatures blowing in as the days got shorter and shorter. Along with the cold, a certain fiery haired model had also come back to the big apple, taking the city by storm. Peter had been excited to see MJ again, eager for a friendly face. He'd met up with her so they could both get some shopping done. The holidays were weeks away, but he always did better when he had her advice.

"It's nothing MJ," Peter said eventually.

"Riiight," MJ said. "Are we pretending that I don't know you? Is that what this is? Because I can play along. Stranger danger! Stranger danger!"

Peter laughed, reaching out to try to cover her mouth, letting her get away when she ducked. "Can you please not get me arrested today?" he asked through his laughter.

"I make no promises," MJ huffed, falling back into step next to him. "Now spill the beans before I have to try and wrestle it out of you."

"Wouldn't that be an ordeal," Peter purred, wrapping an arm around MJ's waist, fingers skittering along her side.

MJ elbowed him in the ribs hard enough to make him grunt. "Peter, with you?  _ Everything  _ is an ordeal,” she said. “So how about we cut out the roundabout ‘I’m fine no really don't worry about it’ circle jerk and get right to the point?”

“Did anyone ever tell you that you should write poetry?” Peter asked, pretending to stop and stare into a shop window.

“Quit deflecting,” MJ huffed, yanking him along by his sleeve. He could have rooted himself to the spot and refused to budge, but he’d always been weak to her. “You know I’ll get it out of you eventually, why are you stalling the inevitable?”

“Pride?” Peter suggested, earning him another elbow in the ribs.

“You think you’re so funny, don’t you?” Mj said, unimpressed. “Fine, whatever, don’t tell me what’s going on.”

_ That’s a trap _ , Peter thought, gritting his teeth behind his lips, but he wasn't going to fall for it. He was an adult who wasn’t going to be baited by such an obvious, juvenile tactic. There was no way he was going to let MJ win like this, not in a million years.

“So you know Johnny’s dating Iceman, right?” he said, folding like wet cardboard.

MJ was gracious enough not to look too smug. “He’s an X-Man, right?” The ice guy?” she asked. “What, is he a jerk or something?”

“No, he’s super nice and sweet to Johnny and so far he seems like he’s an incredible boyfriend,” Peter said, the growl of his voice at odds with his words.

MJ raised her eyebrow. “Aaaand this is a bad thing?”

“No. Yes, maybe,” Peter said. He let out a sigh. “I don’t know. I know I should be happy for Johnny, but…”

“But?” MJ prompted.

Peter frowned down at a pile of slush off to one side of the sidewalk. That morning it had probably been a fresh mound of powdery white snow. Now it was a greyish pile of dirty, half-melted sludge waiting for someone to put their foot in it and slip. There was a cigarette butt stuck in it near the top.

“But I’m  _ not _ ,” he said, frown deepening. “I see the two of them together and it just… it pisses me off.”

“I see,” MJ hummed. “And you have any idea why?”

“Not a clue,” Peter said. “I  _ thought _ I was just being weird and protective, especially over the guys Johnny used to see. All those—” he waved a hand dismissively, “—party guys who just wanted to get close to Johnny because he’s famous.”

“Right,” MJ said, following along but not sounding like she was convinced yet.

“But Bobby isn’t like that,” Peter continued. “He’s nice, he’s  _ good _ to Johnny. Hell, I  _ like _ Bobby usually. But every time I see the two of them together I just want to throw Bobby into the Hudson.”

MJ hummed in consideration. Peter could see the wheels turn behind her eyes as she tried to figure out what the hell was going on. Over the years he’d come to depend on her advice and guidance, steering him in better directions than he would have ever figured out. Sometimes it felt like she knew his head better than he didn, and if anyone could help him out of this hole he’d found himself in, it was her.

“So you said that you were having issues before Bobby and Johnny even started dating?” MJ asked. “When Johnny was basically going home with whoever caught his eye that night?”

“Yeah,” Peter said. “I mean, yeah it's Johnny’s right to do whatever he wants with his time, but those guys were just…  _ bad _ for him. They didn’t care about him, they wanted to use him for his fame.”

“But Bobby’s not like that,” MJ said, a statement rather than a question.

“No, he’s not like that,” Peter sighed. “He genuinely cares about Johnny. Shit, I think he might even love him.”

“Right,” MJ said, “but you're still—?” she wiggled her fingers at him vaguely.

Peter groaned. “I  _ know _ . I just—I just can’t seem to help it. I see Johnny with a guy, no matter who they are, and I get all these nasty feelings inside. I don’t even know where they came from. When he told me he was in love with me I was completely cool with it, but when he started seeing other guys it suddenly became an issue.”

MJ’s eyebrows shot up. “I’m sorry, what? He told you he was in  _ love _ with you?”

“Oh, yeah,” Peter said. “He apparently had this huge crush on me for a long time. Looking back on it now, it was so obvious, I’m really surprised I never suspected.”

MJ looked at him like he’d grown a second head. “And you’re just fine with this?” she asked.

Peter frowned. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” he said. “Honestly, I was actually a little flattered. It was kind of sweet to know that he’d been holding a torch for so long.” He grinned. “Get it? Holding a—”

“Peter shut up, I swear to God,” MJ said, bringing a hand to her forehead like she was fighting off a migraine. She took a few deep breaths and finally looked up at Peter, her eyes assessing. “Peter,” she said slowly, “do you think what you’re feeling might be  _ jealousy _ ?”

Peter blinked, surprised. Jealousy? Why would he be jealous? And of what? Of Johnny? Of  _ Bobby _ ? The thought of it was just absurd, and he opened his mouth to tell MJ so, but then he stopped. Jealousy… now that he actually gave it a second thought, the swirling feelings in his gut did feel pretty similar to jealousy, he supposed it wasn’t entirely implausible. The question remained however, as to why he’d be feeling jealous over Johnny and Bobby dating. Was he jealous of their relationship? Jealous of Johnny for having something that Peter had been struggling to find for the last little while?

Peter thought back to the photo he’d been glaring at earlier. Johnny looked so…  _ happy _ in the photo. There was a bright smile on his face and his eyes were alight with mirth. Peter had always taken it upon himself to try and coax that smile out of Johnny, knowing that he was one of the few people who could. Despite Johnny’s seemingly charmed life, there were very few people Johnny actually had around to call ‘friends’. There was Wyatt of course, but he had his own life, and was rarely in New York besides. Jen was equally busy with her own stuff, as were most of the other people Peter could think to name that Johnny might consider friends. Peter was also often busy with his own stuff, but he always made time for Johnny when he could.

Was that what was bothering him? That someone else was making Johnny smile that way, when until now it had only been Peter the majority of the time? Was that where these horrible feelings were coming from? All this time, had it been because Peter was jealous of  _ Bobby _ ?

“I think…” Peter said slowly, “that you might be right.”

“I often am,” MJ said, something glinting in her eyes.

“Wow,” Peter said, blinking at the sudden revelation. “I can’t believe I was so  _ blind _ . All this time and it was staring me right in the face.”

“You are kind of a moron when it comes to your own emotions,” MJ said, starting to look a little relieved.

“Yeah, but I never really realized I could ever be this bad though,” Peter said. “I mean, I can’t believe I never noticed that I’ve been feeling neglected all this time.”

MJ paused. “What?” she asked.

“I mean, I noticed Johnny and I hadn’t been hanging out as much recently, but I didn't realize how much I resented Bobby for it,” Peter said. “Maybe if I talk to Johnny a little we can clear the air.”

MJ stared at Peter, looking a little like she was having five revelations all at once. “Oh my god,” she said. “I almost  _ married _ you.”

“What?” Peter asked, completely confused now.

“I have to leave,” MJ said, starting to walk away. “Before I strangle you for being the world’s stupidest  _ genius _ .”

“What’d I say?” Peter asked, trotting to keep up. “MJ! C’mon, what was it  _ this _ time?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MJ is off to scream into the void.
> 
> I've noticed that there's a running thread of me dunking on Tony in this fic. Honestly I like Tony I'm just sick of the MCU.


	12. Part II.iii: Asterism

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took way longer than I hoped it would, but I finally got it up. I'm hoping everyone likes it and that everyone is staying safe in these weird wiggly times we're living in.
> 
> Also sorry for the Christmas episode in May, though to be fair it was originally going to be Valentines and i was aiming for it to be February but uuuuuuuhh whoops?
> 
> Trigger warning for pooooooorn

Christmas morning began the way it always did; with Peter crawling out of his window at ass o’clock in the morning, making his way towards the Statue of Liberty, swinging through the quiet streets.

It was particularly cold that morning, enough so that Peter was wondering if he shouldn’t just call Johnny to pick him up instead of swinging through the frozen air. He quickly dismissed the idea, tradition was tradition after all, and he always met Johnny at the statue. He’d just have to deal with the cold until he met up with Johnny, who would certainly be willing to warm him up.

That in mind, Peter tucked his present a little more securely under his arm and put a burst of speed into his swings. If he was lucky, Johnny would beat him there and be waiting for him when he arrived.

Luck, it seemed, was in short supply that morning. Peter heard the sirens before he saw it, but the moment he switched his trajectory, he could clearly see the plume of smoke rising against the dim skyline. Cursing, Peter swung towards it, wondering if any other heroes were around or if they, like most sensible people on Christmas, were taking the day off.

The fire wasn't too big by the time Peter arrived, but he knew that could quickly change. Firefighters were already on the scene, but the fire looked like it was fairly high up and he knew it could take a while for them to get up all those stories. Not wasting a moment, Peter swung in through the shattered window, trusting his spider-sense to warn him if he was about to land in any flames.

The fire was concentrated in one corner of the room, where presumably the Christmas tree used to be. Unfortunately it was also near the door, so the terrified occupants of the apartment were left cowering in the corner, too scared to move past the inferno for the door. Peter landed on the ground next to them, keeping his head low to see under the smoke.

“Is there anyone else inside!” Peter called through the din. The woman shook her head frantically. “Okay good, hold this,” he said, thrusting the present under his arm into her hands.

It was difficult carrying two people at once, but Peter managed to secure a hold around the woman and let the man cling to his back as he swung them down to ground level. As he was handing them off to some EMT’s, there was a shout and people began to point up at the sky. When he turned, Peter spotted the streak of fire in the sky just before it flew through the window.

A moment later, the smoke dissipated and Johnny flew out of the window, arching upwards into the sky. Peter followed him closely, crawling up the side of the building just in case he needed to make a daring rescue. A burst of fire lit up the sky overhead, far above the buildings where it couldn’t damage anything. Peter squinted through the low clouds, trying to pick out where Johnny was. A gently falling star broke through the clouds, and Peter swung down to meet it as it landed.

“Good morning,” Peter said, reaching out to catch Johnny as he stumbled. “You okay?”

Johnny took a few deep breaths, leaning heavily on Peter. “Yeah, yeah I’m okay,” he said. “Wasn’t a very big fire, I’ll be fine in a minute. Just need to sit down.”

“You got it firefly,” Peter said, slinging Johnny’s arm around his shoulder and hoisting him up with a hand on his hip. “Merry Christmas by the way.”

Johnny chuckled, smiling up at him. “Merry Christmas Spidey.”

Peter smiled and deposited Johnny on the back of an ambulance, where an EMT descended to ask a dozen questions while Peter went off to retrieve the present that he’d left in the care of the woman from the apartment. When he returned, Johnny had been tucked into a blanket and was sipping from a water bottle.

“That for me?” Johnny asked, gesturing to the present tucked under Peter’s arm.

“Yes, but you can’t have it until we get to the statue,” Peter said. “Tradition and all.”

Johnny rolled his eyes. “Fine fine, but let’s skip the race okay? We’re both here, I can just fly you over.”

“Fine with me,” Peter said, sitting next to Johnny on the step of the ambulance.

Eventually they learned that the fire had been ignited by a faulty string of lights on the Christmas tree. It was apparently a very common problem over the holidays, when people kept dry, dead trees inside their homes strung with flammable tinsel and lights that had been sitting tangled in boxes the rest of the year. From a distance, Peter and Johnny watched the woman from the apartment chew out her boyfriend for cheaping out and getting a dry tree.

“Oof, so much for the holiday spirit,” Peter said, watching the couple be escorted into separate ambulances to be checked over.

“I mean, it probably doesn't help that their apartment just burned up,” Johnny said. “Kind of puts a damper on the whole holiday.”

“Probably,” Peter said. “Anyway, feeling better?”

“Just another minute,” Johnny hummed, stretching. “It always takes so much out of me to do that.”

“Luckily the fire wasn't so big,” Peter said, unable to tear his eyes away from the long lines of Johnny’s figure as he stretched.

“Very,” Johnny said. “I was hoping to spend part of the day with Bobby, and it would really suck to be exhausted before we even get to have any fun.”

Peter sucked in a breath, trying not to think about what Johnny was implying. It was harder than it should have been—it took Peter a moment to move past it enough to even speak. “That would be terrible,” he managed.

Johnny grinned, bright and mischievous. “It certainly would. Bobby said he had a  _ surprise _ for me,” he said.

“How nice of him,” Peter said, carefully keeping his voice steady. He wanted to talk to Johnny about how he’d been feeling left out lately, but he didn't think now was the right time. Better to wait until after the holidays.

After a few more minutes, Johnny stood up and handed the blanket back to the EMT. “Alright, I think I’m good,” he said. He held out a hand for Peter to take. “Ready?”

“Took you long enough,” Peter teased, hopping up and taking Johnny’s hand, reveling in the warmth. He’d managed to warm up a little sitting in the back of the ambulance, but there was nothing compared to the sheer heat Johnny gave off.

“I could just drop you in the river, you know that right?” Johnny scoffed. He took Peter’s other hand and flamed on, flying them up.

“You wouldn't though,” Peter said. “You love me too much.”

It was hard to see Johnny roll his eyes through the flames, but Peter had years of experience behind him and had long ago learned to read the subtle movements under the fire. “To my own detriment. Honestly, I don’t know why I even developed a crush on you in the first place.”

“My rugged good looks?” Peter suggested with a grin.

“I didn’t even know what your face looked like,” Johnny pointed out.

“My magnetic charms?”

“You’re more annoying than charming really.”

“My wicked sense of humor?”

“No.”

Peter laughed. “Well it must have been something about me,” he said. “You were  _ in love _ with me,” he sang.

“Ugh,” Johnny scoffed. “I never should have told you that.”

“But you did, and now you're stuck with me forever,” Peter teased.

Johnny scoffed. “I could still drop you in the river,” he said, casting a meaningful glance at the grey water as they approached it.

“If you drop me, I’ll haunt you forever,” Peter threatened.

“You’d probably live,” Johnny said. “You’ve survived worse.”

“I know where you sleep,” Peter hissed, tightening his grip on Johnny’s wrists.

Johnny didn't answer, making Peter look up curiously. Johnny wasn't even paying attention to him anymore, instead looking off over the water. Peter frowned and followed his gaze, looking out to where the Statue of Liberty stood in the distance, the grey air obscuring it slightly. Even through the foggy air, there was something off about the statue’s head, looking oddly distorted even at this distance.

“What  _ is _ that?” Peter asked, squinting through the fog.

“I don’t know. Hold on,” Johnny said, putting on a burst of speed.

In moments, they got close enough to see what was making Lady Liberty’s head look so strange; a flower crown made of ice encircled her head, the spikes of her regular crown peeking out through the sculpture. Delicate petals and leaves glimmered in the morning light as the sun finally began to peer over the horizon, the fog starting to dissipate and clear away.

“What the heck?” Peter asked incredulously. “What sort of vandal makes ice flower crowns on monuments? And on  _ Christmas _ ?”

“I think I have an idea,” Johnny said, sounding a little guilty. He swooped down over the statue, and sure enough, Iceman was there, shaping a delicate rose out of ice.

Peter’s stomach twisted.

Bobby looked up as Johnny landed on the head of the statue. “Johnny?” he called, looking confused but still smiling. “What are you doing here?”

“I think the bigger question is what are  _ you _ doing here?” Peter said, the words more hostile than they probably needed to be.

“Spider-man?” Bobby asked, raising an icy brow. “What’s going on?”

Johnny stepped forward, putting himself between Peter and Bobby, stepping close enough to take his hands. “Bobby, what are you doing?” he asked.

Bobby squeezed Johnny’s hand, still in his ice form. Peter wondered if he would melt if Johnny flamed on. “I was making your present,” Bobby said.

“My present?” Johnny questioned.

“I didn’t know what to get you, you’re  _ really _ hard to buy for, so I thought I’d make you something,” Bobby explained. “I was going to call you later to fly out here to see it.”

“Right,” Johnny said slowly, glancing around at the ice sculpture. Up close, it was incredibly intricate, with different textures on the leaves and the petals, and even a few little ice bees crawling around. Bobby must have woken up extremely early to get started on it.

Bobby saw Johnny’s hesitation and frowned. “You don’t like it,” he said.

“No, no that’s not it,” Johnny protested, shaking his head and stepping closer into Bobby’s space. “It’s beautiful and I  _ love _ it,” he said. “It’s just…”

“This is  _ our _ spot,” Peter said, crossing his arms, trying to reign in the anger in his throat.

“Your spot?” Bobby asked, glancing at Peter for a moment before looking back to Johnny.

Johnny sighed. “You know how I write messages in the sky for Spidey to meet me at the ‘Usual Place’?” he asked. “Well, this is it.”

“This?” Bobby asked, glancing around. “The Statue of Liberty?”

“Yeah, we come out here all the time to hang out,” Johnny explained. “We met here a few times years and years ago, and over the years this just kind of became ‘our’ spot,” he said. “Every Christmas we meet up here to exchange gifts. It’s kind of a tradition for us.”

“Oh,” Bobby said, looking guilty now. “Oh man I’m so sorry babe, I had no idea,” he said. “I didn't even think about that.”

“It’s okay, I never really mentioned it,” Johnny said.

“I mean, it's not like we made it a secret or anything,” Peter grumbled. “There are whole blogs dedicated to spotting us up here. We’re practically a landmark.”

“Spidey,” Johnny huffed, glaring. “Not helping.”

“No, he’s right,” Bobby said. “I should have put more thought into where I was doing this.”

“It looks like you put lots of thought into it already,” Johnny said, reaching out to run a hand over a delicate petal of ice. It was so thin it looked like it might snap at the lightest touch, but it didn’t even tremble under Johnny’s hand.

“I mean, you can put an ice sculpture anywhere,” Peter said. “Especially if you have ice powers.”

“ _ Spider-man _ ,” Johnny hissed.

Bobby let out a sigh. “Johnny, I’m really sorry,” he said. “I didn’t mean to intrude on your thing with Spider-man. I’ll just… I’ll just go,” he said, starting to pull away from Johnny.

“Bobby wait,” Johnny said, grabbing onto Bobby before he could leave. “You don't have to go.”

Peter’s stomach sank. Throughout the years, this place, the Statue of Liberty, it had only ever been for Peter and Johnny. For all that they’d been through over the years, this spot was  _ theirs _ and theirs alone. That Johnny would so casually invite Bobby to stay made something in Peter’s chest feel small and fragile.

“No, it’s okay,” Bobby said, forcing a smile. “I’ll meet up with you later, okay?”

“Okay,” Johnny said softly.

Bobby’s smile melted into something a little more genuine, though slightly sad around the edges. He leaned in and placed a kiss on Johnny’s lips—Peter glanced away—before sliding down an ice ramp and away from the island, leaving Peter and Johnny alone at the Usual Place.

For a second, Johnny watched Bobby skate over the river, back to the city. He let out a long, deep sigh, his breath curling out in a large cloud of fog. He turned around to face Peter.

“Sorry about that,” he said. “I honestly had no idea he was going to do that.”

“Yeah,” Peter said, stomach still cold.

“It really is pretty though,” Johnny said, looking around at the sculpture surrounding them. “He must have been planning this for a while.”

“Yeah probably,” Peter said. A moment of silence stretched out between them before snapping like an old rubber band. “You know, I never brought Mary Jane out here.”

“Huh?” Johnny asked, looking up.

“Mary Jane,” Peter repeated. “I’ve never brought her out here. Not even when I was sure I was going to  _ marry _ her.”

“Okay,” Johnny said slowly. “What does that have to do with anything?”

“It means that this is  _ our place _ ,” Peter said. “I don’t—I  _ wouldn’t _ bring anyone else here.”

Johnny frowned. “I didn’t  _ bring _ Bobby here, he came here without asking.”

“Well you were pretty quick to invite him to stay,” Peter snapped, the anger bubbling up before he could stop it.

Johnny’s eyes flashed—literally. “I was trying to comfort my boyfriend. It wasn’t like I was going to invite him to come out here whenever he wants.”

Peter opened his mouth to protest, but Johnny cut him off. “And you’re one to throw stones. I’ve lost count of the times you’ve blown me off to go spend time with one of your ‘real’ friends.”

“ _ Real _ friends?” Peter asked. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

Johnny scoffed. “It means that you call me your ‘best friend’, but I’ve met Mary Jane  _ twice maybe _ in the entire time I’ve known you, and—like you said—you almost  _ married _ her.”

Peter bristled. “I have a secret identity!”

“Not from her,” Johnny pointed out. “She knows you’re Spider-man, and she knows we’re friends. I can count on one hand the times I’ve been in the same room as her.”

“You met my aunt, you came to her wedding!” Peter protested, but he could tell he was losing traction on this argument.

“I  _ crashed _ her wedding,” Johnny pointed out. For a moment he looked like he was about to continue arguing, but he stopped and let out a long sigh. “Look, can we not do this today? It’s  _ Christmas _ . Let’s just… let’s just exchange gifts and have a nice holiday, okay?”

Peter pressed his lips together, not wanting to let this go, not yet, but Johnny seemed to read him and cut him off again. “Peter, this is my first Christmas in like, three years, can you please drop it?”

With a guilty flush, Peter realized that this was Johnny’s first Christmas since coming back from the Negative Zone. From Johnny’s perspective, this would be the first holiday he’d had in  _ years _ . As much as Peter felt like continuing the argument, making his point, he knew he’d feel like too much of a heel for ruining Johnny’s day to get any sort of satisfaction from it.

Peter forced himself to relax, to let the tension bleed out of his shoulders. He still felt the cold lump inside of his stomach, but for Johnny, he could swallow it back down. “Sorry,” he said quietly. “I didn’t mean to… nevermind. Here,” he said, thrusting his present at Johnny.

Johnny took the bag and carefully dug through the tissue paper Peter had packed into it to pull out a T-shirt. It was one of the bootleg shirts that had popped up all over the city, white with the words ‘Flame On!’ written in rainbow glitter across the chest. Peter had seen it in a tourist trap and knew he’d needed to get it for Johnny, if only to get a laugh out of him.

It didn't disappoint, and Johnny snorted the moment he laid eyes on it. “Cute,” he said. He pulled out a little box from his pocket and handed it over.

Peter rolled the box over his hands once, trying to guess what was in it—it was fairly heavy for being so small. He unwrapped it carefully, his aunt's voice in his head reminding him to save the pretty ribbon that had been tied around it. Opening up the little cardboard box, Peter pulled out a snowglobe, with a little Spider-man wearing a santa hat inside.

“Honestly, the amount of merch of me that gets sold, I should be taking a cut,” Peter said, giving the globe a little shake, watching the glitter flurry around inside.

“Speaking of,” Johnny said, pulling out a card. Inside was a cheque for a couple thousand dollars. “You were on the team for like a half a second, and there wasn’t really enough time for merch to get sold, but they did make some stuff with your face on it. It wasn’t finished in time for any of it to be sold while you were on the team, so we decided to sell it to some collectors as limited editions and made a little bit of money off them. That’s your share.”

“Wow, thanks Johnny,” Peter said. “I didn’t even know there were plans to include me in the FF merch.”

“Yeah well, I ended up not being gone that long, at least by your time,” Johnny said, getting a far off look in his eyes for a moment. “Most of what was made was just prototypes. The little plush dolls looked okay, but the action figures were super wonky looking.”

Peter snorted. “Well, it can’t be worse than this,” he said, shaking the globe again. “The eyes are lopsided and the spider on my back only has six legs.”

Johnny smiled. “I know, I got the worst looking one on purpose.”

“Of course you did,” Peter said, smiling back.

They moved at the same time, both coming together just like they always had. Peter wrapped his arms around Johnny, pulling him in for a tight hug. He was warm as always, the heat of him seeming to seep into Peter. It was almost as if there was a part of Johnny that was trying to stay with Peter always. At least, Peter liked to think of it that way.

They moved back, and for a moment the air seemed to still around them as they stared into one another’s eyes. Johnny was a fraction shorter than Peter, and had to look up ever so slightly. As close as they were, Peter could see the variations of blue in Johnny’s eyes, the flecks of darker and lighter colours that made up the bright, clear blue of Johnny’s eyes. Peter could spend hours listing all of the different blues in his eyes and still not get anywhere close to describing how beautiful Johnny’s eyes were.

Almost involuntarily, Peter’s gaze dropped to Johnny’s lips. He wasn’t wearing makeup today, but there was no denying the bright pink of his lips wasn't eye catching on their own. They were also incredibly plush and full, and looked incredibly soft to the touch. Johnny parted them slightly, his warm breath fogging in the cool air. For a moment Peter was so mesmerized that he didn't even realize he was staring.

“Peter?” Johnny asked, voice cutting through the chilled air. He sounded breathy and startled, like he wasn't sure if he was dreaming or not, and it brought Peter snapping back into reality.

Peter cleared his throat and let go of Johnny. “Merry Christmas Johnny,” he said.

Johnny stared at Peter like he was trying to see inside of his brain. After an uncomfortable extended moment, he seemed to give up. “Merry Christmas Pete,” he said.

Peter forced a smile, but couldn't seem to penetrate the silence around them. There was something lost sorrowful in Johnny’s eyes, something Peter couldn't quite figure out. He almost reached for Johnny again, almost took him back into his arms and asked what was wrong, what Peter could do to fix it. In that moment, Peter felt like he would do anything to make Johnny smile again.

The rising sun glinted off part of the ice sculpture and into Peter’s eyes. The moment passed.

“I should get going,” Johnny said finally. “Kids will be up soon and I always make breakfast.”

“Of course,” Peter said, the words banging around in his hollow chest.

Johnny flashed a smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes. He flamed on and suddenly the blue was consumed by fire, unreadable. “I’ll talk to Bobby about… this. I promise.”

Peter nodded, but his voice clogged in this throat. With one last wave, Johnny flew out over the water towards the city, leaving Peter standing on the statue alone, surrounded by ice, watching as Johnny’s light faded into the distance.

A cold wind whistled through the spikes of the statue’s crown. Peter shivered, already missing Johnny’s warm presence. He glanced over at a large intricate ice rose, glimmering beautifully in the rising sunlight. Growling, Peter slammed his fist into the center of it, shattering the whole section of the sculpture. The force of his blow jolted through his body, causing him to slip on the slick ice under his feet. Unable to get a grip in time, Peter landed hard on his back, winding himself as he landed.

Peter gasped and struggled to catch his breath, staring up at the pale yellow sky. In the distance he could hear a helicopter—his ride home—coming across the water towards him. He managed to get his breathing to steady out and banged his head once against the statue.

“Fuck,” he swore, at the universe or himself, he wasn't quite sure.

* * *

Johnny spent the rest of the day doing his best to put that morning out of his head, instead focussing on spending time with his family. He made breakfast for everyone and exchanged gifts, laughing and playing with the kids. For the most part he was able to forget about the weirdness from that morning—Bobby’s misstep, Peter’s hissy fit, and then… whatever that had been at the end. If he didn't know any better, he’d have thought Peter had wanted to kiss him.

Like  _ that _ would ever happen.

It wasn’t as though Johnny had never thought about it, he  _ had _ been in love with Peter for years, since they were kids basically. There had been more than one night that he’d kept himself awake at night, wondering what it would be like to kiss that proud mouth. Peter never seemed to bother with moisturizer or lip balm, would his lips be chapped and rough? Would Peter be forceful and take control of the kiss, or would he be sweet and gentle? Johnny had long been intrigued by Peter’s strength, not only by how he used but how he  _ didn’t _ use it. Peter had the capacity to be brutal and vicious, but he could also be impossibly gentle and kind. How would he hold Johnny in those incomprehensibly strong arms?

How would he make love to Johnny?

Johnny had kept himself up very late with questions like that.

But now wasn't the time to revisit his old crush, not when he had a sweet, attentive boyfriend in Bobby. Not when Peter was completely straight and always would be. Not when Peter would  _ never _ look at him that way. Johnny was better off just forgetting about Peter entirely and focussing on his relationship with Bobby.

That in mind, Johnny made his way over to the school like he and Bobby had planned, his present tucked under his arm. He rang the front bell and waited, somehow feeling incredibly anxious. It wasn’t long before Kitty stuck her head through the door.

“Oh, hey Johnny,” she said, smiling at him. “Hold on I’ll let you in.” She disappeared back through the door again, and a moment later the door swung open to let him inside. “Bobby’s upstairs, you can head right up.”

“Thanks Kitty, Happy Hanukkah,” he said, making his way towards the stairs. There were more kids around than he expected there to be for a holiday, but then Johnny remembered that a lot of the kids probably couldn't go home for the holiday, their families rejecting them for being mutants. Johnny’s heart ached for them.

Putting that thought aside for the moment, Johnny headed up to Bobby’s room. The door was slightly open so Johnny let himself inside, following Bobby’s voice out to where he was pacing on the balcony, talking on his phone. He seemed slightly agitated, pacing up and down on his balcony and spreading frost with each step. He noticed Johnny and gave him a half smile and a wave, then mimed a noose around his neck while Johnny set his present down on the nightstand.

“What? No I’m listening,” Bobby said, going back to pacing across the balcony. “Yes… yes… yes of course I—what? No Mom, of course not,” he said, getting more and more agitated as he paced. “Listen Mom, I need to go, I… I have a guest.”

Johnny tried not to let it sting, knowing that Bobby tended to avoid talking about tough subjects with his parents. They must have known that Johnny and Bobby were dating, it had been all over the gossip vines for months now, but it wasn’t something they’d ever brought up with Bobby, and Bobby had never tried to talk about it with them either. Johnny understood, he knew that Bobby’s relationship with his parents wasn’t great and it was all Bobby could do to be civil with them at times, but it did feel a little like Bobby was ashamed of him.

Bobby finally hung up the call and let out a long groan. “ _ Parents _ ,” he grumbled. “Why is it always such a nightmare to talk to them?”

“I wouldn't know,” Johnny said as neutrally as possible. What he wouldn't give to talk to either of his parents for five minutes.

Bobby seemed to realize his misstep and cleared his throat. “So now that the obligatory uncomfortable holiday phone call with my folks is over, hi,” he said, wrapping his arms around Johnny and pulling him in for a kiss. There was a light dusting of frost on his lips, which melted the moment they met Johnny’s.

“Hi,” Johnny hummed, melting just as fast as the frost. “Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas. Sorry about earlier,” Bobby said, colour rising in his cheeks. “I really had no idea that was like, a special spot for you and Spider-man.”

“We  _ are _ kind of a landmark,” Johnny said, but he kept his tone light. “Don’t worry too much about it. Spidey will get over himself eventually.”

“Yeah but in the meantime, he’s  _ scary _ ,” Bobby said with an exaggerated shiver. “He’s one guy I  _ never _ want to be on the bad side of.”

“He’s not that bad,” Johnny said.

“You don't notice it because you're his favourite,” Bobby pointed out.

Johnny scoffed. “I’m not his favourite.”

“You’re his favourite,” Bobby said. “But that’s okay, because I’m  _ your _ favourite, right?” he asked, grinning and tugging on Johnny’s belt loops.

Johnny chuckled. “Of course you are,” he said, leaning in for another kiss.

They stayed that way for a while, kissing leisurely. The balcony door was still open, but they paid no attention to the cold breeze tugging at their clothes. Bobby’s hands found their way under Johnny’s shirt and roamed across his back, feeling the sinewy muscle and smooth skin. Johnny hummed and deepened the kiss, tangling one hand in Bobby’s short hair.

“Hm, so,” Bobby said, breaking away from Johnny for a moment. “I know this morning was a bust, but let me make it up to you?”

“Alright,” Johnny hummed, kissing along Bobby’s jaw. “What did you have in mind?”

Bobby grinned and kicked the balcony door closed, then pulled Johnny over towards the bed. “I think I’ve got a few ideas,” he purred into Johnny’s ear.

Johnny shivered. “Well, don’t let fear and common sense stop you.”

Bobby grinned and bit Johnny’s earlobe lightly before making his way down Johnny’s neck, kissing and sucking little marks into the sensitive skin. Johnny hummed and reached down to tug Bobby’s shirt up and off. Bobby paused to toss it over the side of the bed, then helped Johnny do the same. Bobbly fell back on top of Johnny, bumping their noses together as he tried to catch his mouth. Johnny laughed and tilted his head for a better angle, hands roaming across Bobby’s chest and back. Bobby settled on top of Johnny, their pelvises pressing together. Johnny sighed, the pressure sending little tingles of pleasure through his body.

“Hey,” Johnny managed between kisses. “I think you should open your present.”

“Now?” Bobby groaned, nibbling a hickey into Johnny’s collarbone.

“Now,” Johnny insisted.

Bobby let out a long dramatic groan and hauled himself up off the bed, reaching for the nightstand. He gave Johnny a curious look before tearing into the paper.

“Oh, this—” Bobby gasped slightly when he finally revealed the present; a large, brightly coloured dildo, new and still in it’s box.

“Merry Christmas,” Johnny purred, sitting up to lay kisses to Bobby’s collar. “I thought we could have a little fun for the holidays.”

Bobby flushed pink. “That’s—yeah I’m down for that,” he said.

Johnny grinned and reached around to squeeze Bobby’s ass through his jeans. “So, did you want me to use it on you?” He flopped back on the bed, spreading out over the pillows and giving Bobby a sultry look. “Or did you want to use it on me?”

The pink in Bobby’s cheeks went all the way up to his ears and down onto his chest. “You,” he choked. “I wanna use it on you.”

Johnny’s grin widened. “Well, what are you waiting for?”

Bobby shivered and fumbled around with the box, trying to get it open. After a moment of fumbling around with the plastic, he managed to jerk it open, the dildo flopping out and landing on Johnny’s chest. Johnny laughed at Bobby’s embarrassed sputter and picked up the dildo, rubbing a thumb along a silicon vein.

“We should probably give it a wash before we use it,” Johnny said. “You’ve got a cleaner?”

“Yeah in the bathroom,” Bobby said, eyes following Johnny’s fingers on the dildo. He reached out to take it back from Johnny, their hands brushing. “I’ll be right back.”

“I’ll be waiting,” Johnny purred as he watched Bobby head to his bathroom.

The bathrooms in the school were all shared between at least two people, and to Johnny’s knowledge Bobby shared with Hank. Hank wasn’t at the school at the moment, so Bobby went straight in without knocking. Johnny dug through the drawer in the end table for the lube Bobby kept there and wasted no time in shucking his pants, pouring lube over his fingers, plunging them into his hole.

Johnny had just pushed a second finger into his ass when Bobby returned, making a high pitched whine when he saw Johnny. “You’re going to kill me one of these days,” he said.

“Hopefully not before you come over here and help,” Johnny purred, spreading his legs a little wider for Bobby to see.

Bobby made a choking noise and took two long strides towards the bed and hopped onto it. He stared down at Johnny, eyes bright and hungry. Johnny smiled and moaned loudly, throwing his head back and thrusting his fingers into himself, putting on a show. Bobby sucked in a breath, reaching out to smooth a hand over Johnny’s stomach, feeling the bumps and ridges of his abs.

“Fuck,” Bobby swore. “It’s like watching living art.”

“You and I must go to different galleries,” Johnny panted, pushing another finger into his hole. “Bobby  _ please _ .”

Bobby groaned and wrapped his hand around Johnny’s cock, stroking him slowly. Johnny sighed and sped up his fingers, groaning when he managed to brush over his own prostate. He could feel Bobby’s gaze on him, burning against his skin.

“Bobby,” Johnny moaned. “I’m ready, I need it.”

“Okay,” Bobby said, letting go of Johnny’s cock and reaching for the lube. He poured a liberal amount over the shaft of the dildo and gave it a stroke to coat it.

Johnny removed his fingers and spread his legs to give Bobby a better angle. Bobby licked his lips and grabbed the back of Johnny's knee, hoisting his leg over his shoulder and positioning the toy at Johnny’s hole.

“Ready babe?” Bobby asked, pressing the slick, blunt head against Johnny’s hole.

“Give it to me,” Johnny groaned, trying to thrust his hips down onto the toy. With his leg up on Bobby’s shoulder, it was actually quite difficult to move. The restriction was a lot more thrilling than Johnny anticipated.

_ I should get some handcuffs _ , Johnny thought to himself before all rational thought was chased out of his brain as the thick toy was pressed into him. Johnny gasped as he was stretched, the toy uncompromising in its girth. He’d chosen something reasonably sized at the store—at least in comparison to some of the monstrosities he’d seen while shopping—but it was considerably different to have it pressing into him.

“You okay?” Bobby asked, voice shallow and breathy. Steam curled up from where his hand was rubbing Johnny’s thigh.

Johnny panted, trying to string together enough brincells to talk. “Yeah, it’s good,” he gasped. “Bobby,  _ more _ .”

“ _ God _ you look amazing like this,” Bobby groaned, pushing the toy in deeper. “All stretched out and open. I could watch you come undone like this forever.”

“Please,” Johnny begged, trying to grind down onto the toy to little avail. The way his hips were spread made it nearly impossible to move the way he wanted to.

“Do you have any idea what you look like?” Bobby said, starting to thrust the toy in and out of Johnny, shallow little movements as Johnny adjusted to the size. “Do you have any idea how crazy you make me?”

Johnny moaned loudly, toes curling in pleasure, both at the feeling of the toy inside of him and at Bobby’s words. “Bobby,” he moaned. “Please, more,  _ please _ .”

“I love hearing you beg,” Bobby said, suddenly leaning forward, bending Johnny over. Johnny wailed as the toy brushed against his prostate with the new angle.

“Do you do this to yourself when I’m not around?” Bobby asked, “When there’s no one around to satisfy your needs, do you get yourself open with your fingers? Do you fuck yourself like this?”

“Yes, yes,” Johnny babbled, anything to keep Bobby thrusting the toy inside him.

“What do you think about?” Bobby asked, sucking marks into Johnny’s thigh and speeding up his thrusts. “What do you imagine when you fuck yourself with your toys?”

“Bobby,” Johnny whined. “Bobby, oh God,  _ Bobby _ .”

“Tell me baby,” Bobby purred, ducking down to lick a stripe up the inside of Johnny’s thigh, tongue perilously close to Johnny’s balls. “Tell me what you like. Tell me what you want.”

Johnny tried to reach something through the fog of lust. “I want… I want to be held down,” he heard himself saying.

“Held down?” Bobby asked.

“Yes,” Johnny gasped. “Yes, hold me down, make me  _ take _ it.”

A shiver traveled through Bobby’s entire body. “Oh God Johnny,” he groaned, thrusting the toy deeper into Johnny.

Johnny cried out loudly, practically shouting now. He should probably have been more conscious of keeping his voice down, he wasn’t sure how well the school was sound proofed, but he could barely remember his own name, no matter how loud he was being. Bobby didn’t seem to be making any effort to keep him quiet, so Johnny could probably blame him later if anyone heard them. For right now, all Johnny wanted was  _ more _ . More of Bobby, more of his steady strong thrusts with the toy, more of his delicate touches across what skin he could reach, more of his voice whispering in Johnny’s ear, telling him how gorgeous he was and all the things he wanted to do to him.

The heat began to pool in Johnny’s belly. “I’m close,” he whined. “Bobby,  _ please _ I’m so close.”

“That’s good baby, that’s perfect,” Bobby breathed. “Come for me, just like that baby.”

Johnny wailed as his orgasm crashed over him like a wave, every nerve ending suddenly on fire. Bobby fucked him through it with the toy, practically slamming it into Johnny until he was entirely overwhelmed and overstimulated. He dropped Johnny’s leg and let go of the toy, leaving it inside Johnny’s hole. He swung himself over Johnny’s chest, taking his wrists and pinning them back.

“You wanted to be held down, right?” Bobby asked, breathing hard. His cock jutted out from between his legs, practically bumping into Johnny’s chin. “Is this—can I—?”

Johnny flexed his wrists under Bobby’s hands. “Yes,  _ yes _ ,” he whined.

Bobby shivered and scooted forward, leaning heavier on Johnny’s wrists as he thrust his hips towards Johnny’s mouth. Johnny obediently opened his mouth and swallowed Bobby’s cock down. He fought off his gag reflex and tried to keep his throat relaxed as Bobby fucked his mouth.

Bobby didn’t last very long, making a few erratic thrusts down Johnny’s throat before he pulled back, releasing one of Johnny’s wrists to jerk himself off. He came with a pitchy whine, spilling into Johnny’s open mouth and over his face before collapsing to the side, thankfully not on top of Johnny.

They laid there for a moment, panting heavily. Johnny grimaced as the come on his face began to cool and dry. “I swear if you got it in my hair,” he rasped, rolling over to grab some tissue from the nightstand, pausing slightly as the toy shifted inside of him.

“Sorry,” Bobby said, sitting up. “But that was good right? That was okay?”

Johnny flexed his wrists, feeling the phantom pressure of Bobby’s weight holding him down. “It was good.”

Bobby grinned. “Okay, good. I just wanted to make sure,” he said. He trailed his fingertip along Johnny’s side, tracing the smooth skin. “That was really hot.”

“I’m sparing you the obvious pun because yes, it was,” Johnny said, tossing away the dirtied tissues. He rolled back over, and groaned when the toy shifted again. “Bobby, can you—?”

“Oh shit, right, hang on,” Bobby said, getting up and scooting down the bed to carefully remove the toy from Johnny’s oversentive hole.

Johnny shivered as it slid out. “I’m going to need a shower,” he said, feeling the patches where lube was drying on his skin.

“We’d have to hurry up, I think Hank is coming home soon,” Bobby said. “You do  _ not _ want to use the shower after him. If he doesn’t clean it out afterwards, there’s blue fur  _ everywhere _ , and if he does clean it out, it takes forever and there’s  _ still _ fur everywhere.”

Johnny laughed and rolled off the bed. He made his way over to the bathroom, putting a littl sway in his hips, known Bobby was following him with his gaze. He stopped and cast a hooded glance over his shoulder.

“Coming?” he asked.

“I should hope so,” Bobby said, leaping off the bed and following Johnny into the bathroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There originally wasn't going to be any porn in this chapter, Bobby and Johnny were going to have a fight, but honestly they just have such good communication that I didn't have any other option.
> 
> Also I don't know why I gave Bobby a toy/voyer fetish it just happened.


	13. Part II.ix: Dipole

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took foreeeever but despite the odds I finally finished it! I got into a really good writing groove and then my computer's keyboard decided to die on me. I actually finished this on my work laptop, which I'm technically not allowed to do but I was going to get this chapter finished **today** gosh darn it.
> 
> Trigger warning for a homophobe.

Peter did his best to put what happened—what nearly happened—at the Statue of Liberty out of his mind. So he’d had a moment where he’d been completely mesmerized by his best friend’s lips, that wasn't such a big deal. Johnny was an attractive guy, you'd have to be blind not to notice that. Just because Peter had  _ thought _ about kissing him didn’t mean he actually wanted to go through with it.

Something similar had happened back in college, when Peter had been dating Gwen. Sure, he’d  _ considered _ what it would be like to kiss MJ in  _ passing _ , but he’d never have  _ done _ it while he was with Gwen. This was basically the same situation. Well, of course Peter wasn’t actually seeing anyone right now, so there was that, and MJ was obviously a woman as well, but other than that it was basically the same. The fact that he’d ended up dating MJ eventually was circumstantial and in no way meant he actually did want to kiss Johnny eventually or ever.

Right? Of course right.

Despite this flawless logic however, Peter found himself going back to that moment in his head often. Several times a day often. Seemingly everything seemed to trigger the memory, making it leap back into the forefront of his mind. A newspaper with a front page story about the Fantastic Four, a head of curly blonde hair catching his eyes, the sky on a clear day reminding him how blue Johnny’s eyes had looked in that moment, anything and everything seemed to make him think about the moment where he’d been so entranced by Johnny’s mouth that he might have kissed him if he wasn’t completely heterosexual. It was starting to get a little ridiculous. Peter was a busy guy, he couldn't keep getting lost in thought thinking about what it would be like to kiss his friend.

The loud blare of a car horn and the ringing of his spider-sense in his head had Peter leaping back just in time not to get smacked by a car. A couple of other people at the crosswalk gave him a strange look, but didn't say anything. Peter sighed internally and tried to keep his head in the present. After all his years putting his neck on the block for the city, it would be just too ironic to die getting hit by a car, and he wasn’t about to give the universe that kind of satisfaction.

Waiting for the crosswalk to light up this time, Peter continued on his way home, bags of groceries swaying gently from his hands. He’d considered swinging home with his groceries, but that always seemed to end up with him getting attacked or ripping a grocery bag, so he was walking back from the store, hoping to fend off any trouble until he could at least get his ice cream in the freezer.

The universe seemed to have other ideas however. As Peter turned a corner, who should he spot but one Johnny Storm out on the streets of New York City? He wasn't even in Peter’s direct line of sight, but it was as if Peter’s eyes were magnetically drawn to Johnny, picking him out of the crowd in an instant. It was as though the rest of the world was washed out and grey, and Johnny was the only part of it in vibrant colour.

He was sitting at a cafe across the street, way out of Peter’s way, but before Peter could even consider leaving him be, he was crossing the street. He only realized his mistake as he got closer—Johnny was not alone. Bobby was sitting across from him, and they were clearly on a date. Neither of them were dressed for the weather, sitting outside even though it was below freezing out.

Johnny laughed at something Bobby said, his whole face lighting up. He was wearing something loose and flowy looking that was cut way lower than it needed to be, and he’d decided to wear some light makeup, his lips shiny and pink. Peter wished he had his camera.

_ Turn around and go home, _ Peter told himself, putting one foot in front of the other, moving closer to Johnny with each step.  _ Leave before he sees you. He’s on a  _ **_date_ ** _ for crying out loud. What the hell are you doing? _

Too late—Johnny looked up at that moment and spotted him in the crowd. His smile widened and he lifted an arm, waving at Peter and gesturing him over. Peter felt himself smiling and quickened his step, reaching Johnny in moments that somehow felt entirely too long.

“Hey Pete,” Johnny said as Peter reached them. “What brings you to this neighborhood?”

“I live right around the block,” Peter pointed out. “You’ve been to my place, you  _ lived _ there.”

“For like one day,” Johnny said, rolling his eyes. “Before you kicked me out.”

“You were the worst roommate I’d ever had,” Peter huffed. “My bathroom has never been the same.”

“I have no idea what you're talking about,” Johnny huffed.

Peter opened his mouth to keep teasing Johnny, but at that moment Bobby leaned over in his seat and smiled up at Peter. “Hey there, I’m Bobby. You’re a friend of Johnny’s?”

Johnny and Peter shared a quick look—it was sometimes hard to keep track of who was aware of Peter Parker being Spider-Man, especially when they cross-sected with Johnny’s life as well. Peter could usually keep himself in check, but there was always the question of how to explain why he knew Johnny so well.

“Peter Parker,” he said, shrugging his shopping bag onto his wrist so he could reach out a hand for Bobby to shake.

Bobby smiled, friendly as ever, and took Peter’s offered hand. “Nice to meet you,” he said. “Have we met before? I swear I’ve heard your name somewhere.”

“Possibly from the papers,” Johnny said. “Peter was the guy who used to take all those photographs of Spider-Man.”

“Right!” Bobby said. “For the Daily Bugle, right?”

“Yeah, that’d be the one,” Peter said. Somehow the benign smalltalk was starting to grate on his nerves.

“Cool, those were really good photos,” Bobby said. “We always saved the ones you took of the X-Men.”

“You had a subscription to the Bugle?” Peter asked, raising an incredulous brow when Bobby nodded a confirmation. “They  _ hate _ vigilantes.”

“Well yeah,” Bobby said, “but they’re one of the few New York based newspapers that aren’t anti-mutant, so…” he trailed off, letting the unsaid explanation hang in the air.

“Right,” Peter said, conceding the point.

An awkward silence hung in the air for a moment as none of them spoke. Bobby cleared his throat. “So how do you and Johnny know each other? Through Spider-Man I’m guessing?”

Johnny and Peter shared another glance. “Sort of,” Johnny said. “It’s kind of weird.”

“I also interned for Reed for a while,” Peter said.

“Before he fired you,” Johnny pointed out, a grin creeping across his face. Peter had to force himself not to look at Johnny’s shiny pink lips.

“That was a misunderstanding,” Peter said, “and also your fault.”

“ _ My _ fault?” Johnny squawked. “How is you being a  _ moron _ my fault?”

“It’s always your fault,” Peter huffed. “Everything wrong in my life traces back to you somehow and I won’t be taking criticism on this.”

“Oh  _ really _ ?” Johnny glowered, eyes narrowing. “That’s how you want to do this? Because I can and will list all the dumb shit you’ve done that I’ve told you is dumb and you shouldn’t do it.”

“You should know by now that telling me not to do something dumb only wants to make me do it more,” Peter pointed out. “Therefore it’s still your fault.”

“How is you being a contrarian  _ asshat _ my responsibility?” Johnny huffed. “It’s like you're trying to make me lose my mind.”

“What are friends for?” Peter asked, grinning brightly.

Johnny rolled his eyes, but Peter could see the mirth and delight shining in his gaze. It was the look Peter always strove to invoke—there were few things he enjoyed more than pushing Johnny’s buttons, but one of them was definitely getting Johnny to smile at him like he was now.

There was a beep. All three of them paused to check their phones, but it turned out to be Johnny’s phone. He winced when he checked the alert. “Crap, I have to get going to Jan’s,” he said. He turned to Bobby and reached for his hand. “I’m going to have to get going.”

“I’ll walk with you,” Bobby said, getting up and helping Johnny gather his things. He turned to Peterand smiled, friendly as ever. “It was nice to meet you,” he said.

“Sure, same,” Peter said, that odd, churning feeling in his gut starting up again.

“I’ll see you later, okay Pete?” Johnny said, offering a cheerful smile. Whatever gloss he was wearing on his lips glinted in the grey light of the day.

“Yeah, see ya,” Peter said, forcing himself to look at Johnny’s eyes and not his mouth. It was almost worse, looking into those bright pools of blue and remembering how entranced he’d been.

They said the rest of their goodbyes and Johnny and Bobby walked off down the street, their backs to Peter. Bobby slung an arm around Johnny’s shoulders, his hand taking a moment to smoothe across Johnny’s back, seemingly just enjoying touching him. Peter felt like throwing up.

Peter watched them until they disappeared around a corner, standing stock still in the middle of the sidewalk despite the annoyed glances of the people having to step around him.  _ You should have kept walking _ , he thought,  _ You just couldn’t leave him alone. You did this to yourself for no reason. _

Someone bumped into him. “Hey buddy, what the hell is wrong with you?” they snapped, trying to elbow him aside as they hurried past. Peter didn't even flinch at the shove.

“I wish I knew,” Peter grumbled, finally turning and heading back in the direction of his apartment.

* * *

“He seemed nice,” Bobby remarked absently.

Johnny glanced up. “Who, Peter?” he asked. “Yeah he’s great.”

Bobby hummed, a carefully neutral expression on his face. “You two seemed close,” he said after a moment.

Johnny raised an eyebrow. “Yeah I guess, we’ve known each other for a long time.”

Bobby nodded, staying suspiciously quiet. Johnny glanced at him out of the corner of his eye again. “Something wrong?” he asked.

“No no, nothings wrong,” Bobby said. Then, after a minute, “Well, I mean—”

“What?” Johnny asked, trying not to jump to being annoyed.

“You’ve never mentioned him,” Bobby said. “I didn't even know you knew the guy who took pictures of Spider-Man.”

“I—” Johnny started to defend, but cut himself off, realizing that he didn’t really talk about ‘Peter’ much. Whenever he did talk about him, he tended to talk about him as Spider-Man, a leftover from when he didn't know Spidey’s identity.

“It’s… sort of a weird relationship,” Johnny said eventually. “We didn’t like each other for a long time. Teenaged rivalry sort of stuff.”

“Right,” Bobby said, going quiet again for a long moment. “He’s pretty handsome,” he mentioned a minute later.

Johnny gave an annoyed sigh. “Okay, so whatever ‘jealous boyfriend’ thing you’ve got going on right now, I’m going to ask you to knock it off. It’s  _ not _ cute, and Peter is just a friend.  _ Just _ a friend.”

“I’m not jealous,” Bobby said. “But if I was—”

“Oh boy,” Johnny sighed.

“ _ If _ I was,” Bobby repeated, “I think I’d have at least a little reason. I mean, he’s clearly in love with you.”

A laugh jumped out of Johnny’s throat before he could stop it. “Are you kidding me? Peter?  _ In love _ with me? You’ve lost it babe.”

Bobby huffed. “I mean he was flirting with you pretty hard back there,” he said.

“He wasn’t flirting,” Johnny said, rolling his eyes. “That’s just how Peter is.”

“Uh huh,” Bobby said, clearly not convinced.

“Seriously,” Johnny insisted. “Peter Parker is the straightest guy in the  _ universe _ . I once made him breakfast in my underwear and a flirty apron and he didn’t clue in at  _ all _ .”

“So you  _ do _ like him,” Bobby said, his easy smile at odds with the way his hand tightened on Johnny’s shoulder.

“ _ Liked _ , as in  _ past tense _ ,” Johnny admitted finally. “But seriously, it would never go anywhere. He’s  _ completely _ straight. It was just… it was just a  _ crush _ .”

“Mm-hm,” Bobby hummed,too smug for his own good. “A crush that you made breakfast in your undies for.”

Johnny rolled his eyes and pinched Bobby’s side. “Like you’ve never had a crush on any of  _ your _ straight guy friends,” he scoffed.

“Hey hey, I’m not judging you,” Bobby said. “That Peter guy is  _ hot _ . Those broad shoulders and that jawline? Mm, de-lish-ous,” he whistled. “My point was that he’s hot for  _ you _ .”

“You are out of your mind,” Johnny laughed, shaking his head. “Peter’s been my friend for years, he's not in love with me.”

“So you say,” Bobby said, “but he sure looked like he was in love with you.”

“Yeah right,” Johnny huffed.

“Seriously,” Bobby teased. “Besotted, smitten, over-the-moon, capital ‘L’ in  _ love _ with you,” he said. “I could practically feel the cold shoulder he was giving me, and I know a thing or two about cold.”

Johnny rolled his eyes and spun around to face Bobby when they reached the crosswalk. “You have officially lost it.”

“I have an outsider’s perspective,” Bobby said, grinning as he leaned in for a quick kiss. “A year ago I would have given anything for a guy to look at me the way he was looking at you.”

“Absolutely batshit crazy,” Johnny said, stealing another kiss. He lost himself in the moment, the coolness of Bobby’s lips against his. He sighed and tilted his head to deepen the kiss.

“There are  _ children _ watching,” someone hissed. Johnny broke away to see a sneering young woman, heavily pregnant and pushing a stroller with a toddler in it. The toddler seemed more interested in his Iron Man doll than he was in Johnny and Bobby.

Johnny rolled his eyes and—just to be an asshhole—pulled Bobby in for a long, deep kiss. The woman squawked and trundled off, steam practically pouring out of her ears. Johnny smirked into the kiss, turning his concentration back to Bobby for the remainder of it.

“You’re terrible,” Bobby mumbled against his lips.

“You love it,” Johnny teased.

“I love  _ you _ ,” Bobby laughed.

Johnny jolted like he’d been shocked. “What?” he asked, startled.

Bobby dropped his grip on Johnny’s waist, stepping back a pace and leaving Johnny—ironically—cold. “Sorry, I—that just kinda slipped out.”

“Right,” Johnny said, heart tripping in his chest.

“You don't have to say it back,” Bobby assured him. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to spring that on you out of nowhere.”

“It’s fine,” Johnny said, mind still trying to catch up to the words. His phone chimed and he cursed. “That’s probably Jan,” he said.

Bobby waved him off. “Go, we’ll catch up later.”

“I’ll call you,” Johnny promised, stomach still twisting.

“Of course,” Bobby said, putting on a bright smile. He shoved his hands in his pockets, forcing his posture into something casual even though Johnny could see the tension in his shoulders.

“Okay,” Johnny said awkwardly, not knowing what else he could do to fix things in that moment. He leaned forward and planted a quick kiss on Bobby’s cheek, then flamed on and flew the rest of the way to Jan’s studio.

Forgoing the door, Johnny flew straight up to Jan’s window, flaming off a hand and tapping on the glass. Jan bounded over to the window and let him inside, grinning wide and excited.

“Okay, so I think I’ve finally got it  _ perfect _ ,” she said before Johnny could even touch down. “It took a lot of work but I think I’ve got the fabric to work the way we need it to.”

“That’s great Jan,” Johnny said, barely hearing her.

Jan was too excited to pick up on Johnny’s mood, fluttering around her studio and talking excitedly about the textile processes she’d used to get the effect they’d wanted. Johnny watched absently as Jan darted around, mind still reeling about what had just happened.

It wasn’t as though they hadn’t said the L-word at all since they started dating—they’d both said it, but it had always been in conjunction with something  _ about _ them, never just their entire person. Of course Johnny had been excited for the day, for the moment that Bobby would tell him he was in love with him, that he couldn't live without him and they should run away together forever, fantasizing all the ways it might happen, but he’d never pictured it as being at some random crosswalk after they’d kissed to spite a bigot. It seemed so weirdly mundane and out of place considering how crazy their usual lives were.

Even the way it had been said had been so ordinary.  _ I love you _ , the words had tumbled from Bobby’s lips so casually, like he’d been telling Johnny he liked the shirt he was wearing, or that he enjoyed dinner last night. The sky is blue, the grass is green, I love you. Johnny flushed at the memory.

“Hello, earth to Johnny,” Jan called waving a swatch of fabric in front of Johnny’s face. “Where’d you go spacehead? I need you back in the present.”

Johnny gave himself an internal shake. “Sorry Jan, I was having a moment.”

“You looked like you were having several,” Jan said. She raised a critical brow at him, eyes softening. “You okay?”

“Fine,” Johnny said, putting on a smile. “You were saying you got the fabric to work finally? Let me see.”

Jan stared at him for another moment before handing over the swatch in her hand. “Flame on just a little bit. Not a full fire, just a little flicker.”

“Flicker not fire, got it,” Johnny said, taking the swatch in his hands.

Johnny concentrated on keeping the temperature low, remembering Jan saying something about the fabric not being able to withstand anything above a certain point. He let the tips of his fingers light up slightly, enough to send up some sparks. The fire traveled along the fabric, hardly affecting it until the flames reached a very slight raised circle in the middle. The moment the fire touched it, white sparks jumped up, and a perfect circle burned into the fabric, creating a circle pattern where before it had just been a solid colour.

“It works!” Jan shouted in excitement—a little too close to Johnny’s ear for his liking. She snatched the scrap of fabric back and began to inspect it. “This is perfect! It’s  _ exactly _ what we need.”

“That is pretty good,” Johnny said, interested now. He’d thought they might have to scrap his original idea for the outfit if they couldn’t get the fabric to work the way they wanted it to, but now he might actually get to have the outfit he wanted.

Jan cheered and spun around. “I am a  _ genius _ !” she exclaimed. She bounded over to her worktable and swept a large pile of slightly charred fabric to the floor. “So the drape is a little heavier than what I had in mind, but I can make it work, I promise.”

“Well I was thinking a heavier drape might actually work better actually,” Johnny pointed out, walking up to the table beside her. “What with all the beading weighing it down.”

“Excellent point,” Jan said, scrambling for a pencil. “Okay, so I’ve got most of the mockup done, I just need to adjust the fit.”

“You have my measurements,” Johnny said.

“Yeah but I need to make sure the cut looks right,” Jan said. “There’s no way to put any stretch in this fabric without seriously messing with the way it ignites, so we’re going to have to be really precise.”

“Alright then,” Johnny said. “Are you going to have enough time to get this completed?”

Jan hummed. “Probably, if nothing else goes sideways,” she said. “Anyway, strip. I need to see you in the mockup.”

“Why Miss Van Dyne, how forward of you,” Johnny crooned, putting a hand to his cheek in satirical shock. He laughed as a crumpled ball of pattern paper bounced off his head.

“Quit stalling brat. You were the one who was complaining about not having enough time to finish this,” Jan said, readying another ball of pattern paper.

“You’re not that much older than I am,” Johnny pointed out, sauntering over to the little curtain that sectioned off a corner of the studio to change.

“Yeah yeah, we’re both getting old, just get naked already,” Jan huffed, exchanging the paper for a pile of fabric Johnny guessed was the mockup.

“Well if you kept up with your moisturizing routine,” Johnny said, laughing as Jan threw the mockup right at his face.

* * *

It was late by the time Johnny got home. He and Jan had worked long into the evening on getting the measurements and fit just the way they wanted it, and then Johnny had stuck around to help draft the pattern and do some menial tasks for Jan. By the time Johnny realized the time and headed home, Baxter was almost completely dark. The kids were all in bed and it didn’t seem like anyone was up. Johnny tried to keep quiet as he made his way through the common floor, not wanting to disturb the peaceful silence.

As he passed the living room, Johnny noticed the soft glow of the TV flickering in the dark. So much for not disturbing anyone. Johnny poked his head into the living room to see a huge stoney shape sitting on the couch, the TV volume turned low.

“Isn’t it a little late for soap opera reruns?” Johnny asked.

Ben looked up. “S’never too late for soaps. That’s the point of soaps,” he said.

Johnny hummed, hesitating for a moment before stepping into the room and flopping down on the couch next to Ben. Ben raised an eyebrow at him, but Johnny kept his gaze on the glowing TV screen and said nothing. Eventually Ben relaxed back into the couch, the two of them sitting in companionable but stirring silence. Johnny tried to keep his attention on the cheesy melodrama unfolding on the TV, but he couldn’t seem to quiet his mind. He kept thinking about earlier, about what had happened with Bobby.

_ I love you. _

“Hey Ben?” Johnny asked, his voice barely cutting into the silence.

“Hm?” Ben grunted, possibly starting to fall asleep.

“Do you… do you think Bobby and I are good together?” he asked, the words fluttering like anxious birds.

Ben tilted his head to look down at Johnny. “What’d he do?” he asked.

Johnny rolled his eyes. “He didn’t  _ do _ anything, don't get your undies in a bunch,” he huffed.

Ben grunted and settled back down against the couch again. “Alright alright, fine. What was the question?”

Johnny considered brushing it off for a moment, changing the subject to something else. Ben would understand, he wouldn't push or try to get Johnny to explain himself, he’d just let them both forget that Johnny had ever asked anything. It would probably be easier to just avoid it, not think about it, but Johnny couldn’t stop the strange anxiousness in his chest.

“Do you think Bobby and I are good together?” Johnny asked. “As a couple?”

“Sure, you two are peas in a pod,” Ben said. He glanced at Johnny out of the corner of one blue eye. “Why’re you askin’?”

Johnny took a deep breathe, feeling his chest expand, concentrating on getting the words out properly, carefully pronouncing each syllable. “Bobby said ‘I love you’ for the first time today,” he said, words coming out on the exhale.

Ben raised a rocky brow. “He did, did he?” he asked, continuing when Johnny confirmed with a nod. “And how’re we feeling about that?”

Johnny sighed, making a movement with his shoulders that was almost a shrug. “I kind of freaked out in the moment. I mean, it was completely unexpected. He said it to me at a crosswalk, just on a random street corner, completely out of the blue.”

“Not exactly romantic,” Ben agreed. “But you’ve been dating a while, was bound to happen sooner or later.”

“Yeah I know but…” Johnny trailed off, not sure what to say, how to describe the weird feelings twisting through his chest like snakes around his lungs and heart.

Ben let things be quiet for a moment, let Johnny try to get the words out on his own before he asked. “Do you love him back?”

That was the question, wasn't it? It was one thing to date Bobby, to enjoy being with him and care for him so deeply he felt like he could drown in it sometimes, but was he  _ in love _ with Bobby? He’d always wanted to be in love, so much so that he’d fooled himself so many times over the years, trying to force himself to be in love—for all the good that had ever done for him. Now here was Bobby, offering up that love on a plate for Johnny’s taking, and he couldn't bring himself to taste it.

“I don’t know,” Johnny said softly. “I think I am? I  _ want _ to be, but… I just don’t know.”

“That’s fine,” Ben said. “It’s okay if you don’t know kid, figurin’ this stuff out is a fool's errand.”

Johnny sighed and slumped over into Ben’s rocky side, letting himself sink into his warmth. There was something about the way the rough stone of Ben’s skin held onto the warmth of the day that soothed Johnny to his core. Maybe it was just the way he associated it with Ben, with the comfort that Ben’s presence brought, but Johnny decided it didn't matter in the end, it calmed him all the same. Ben had been a near-constant in his life since he was sixteen, and Johnny wasn’t sure what he’d do without him.

“I  _ want _ to be in love with Bobby,” Johnny sighed. “I want it so badly. But… is this what it feels like? Is this how it’s  _ supposed _ to be?”

Ben let out a deep sigh and moved to wrap and arm around Johnny, so he was encased by Ben’s warm, stoney body. “I just wish I knew if I’m doing this right,” Johnny said. “The last time… the last time I  _ thought _ I was in love was…”

Johnny clammed up, wincing internally when Ben shifted against him. They didn't really talk about Lyja, about what happened back then. Johnny had thought he loved Alicia, had thought she was the ‘one’ despite all the red flags. Even when it blew up in his face, when Alicia had turned out to be Lyja, he’d still desperately clung to her,  _ convinced _ that he was in love and that he could make it all work out in the end if he just tried hard enough.

“Well,” Johnny continued, “we both know how that ended up.”

“Yeah,” Ben gruffed, relaxing again after a few long moments.

Johnny didn’t blame Ben for being reluctant to talk about it. Most days Johnny did his best to forget it ever happened. Even if it hadn’t turned out to be Alicia in the end, Johnny had still put his friendship with Ben on the line for something Johnny had known deep down was doomed from the beginning. Sometimes Johnny felt like he was waiting for Ben or Alicia to bring it up, and then found himself wondering if they were waiting for him.

“I know I  _ love _ Bobby,” Johnny said, cracking through the awkward silence. “Like, I  _ care _ about him, and I want him to be happy, just like I want all the people in my life to be happy.”

“But I don’t know if I’m  _ in _ love, you know?” Johnny said. “I… I spent so long chasing love in the wrong places, breaking my heart each time. I don’t… I don’t know if I’m doing this right. I d-don’t want t-to screw this up,” he said, gritting his teeth when he stuttered.

Ben gave him a small squeeze, his hand that could crush steel like tinfoil heavy on his shoulder but so incredibly gentle. “You’re not gonna screw it up kiddo,” he said. His voice was deep and rumbly, echoing around his cavernous chest. “Listen, I’m gonna tell you somethin’ okay?”

Johnny furrowed his brow and looked up at Ben, who was looking down at him with those sparkling blue eyes of his. “I’ve known you a long time, right?” Ben asked rhetorically, giving Johnny another little squeeze. “Since you was a little kid, taggin’ along behind your sister and bein’ a nuisance.”

Johnny scoffed, but couldn't help but smile. The corner of Ben’s mouth quirked up and he continued. “I watched you grow up Johnny,” he said, starting to get a little choked up. “I watched you go from a little sprig of a boy into a grown man, and I want to say that I don’t think I’ve  _ ever _ seen you happier in all those years than since you came out.”

Johnny sucked in a breath, ready to defend himself, but the words wouldn’t come. He hated to admit it, but Ben had a point. He’d spent all those years denying what made him happy, denying himself, and now he no longer had to. He really did feel so much happier now.

Ben continued. “I can’t tell you what it means to me kid,” he said, eyes shiny and wet, “seein’ you bounce around like the happiest man in all Kodny. Thinkin’ about you spendin’ all those years—” Ben’s voice choked slightly and Johnny could feel his own eyes start to sting. “Thinkin’ about you  _ not _ being happy all that time makes me feel like the dumb pile o’ rocks I am.”

“You’re not,” Johnny said softly. “You’re not dumb.”

“And you ain’t either kiddo, no matter how much grief I give you about it,” Ben said, grinning slightly. “And you deserve to be loved, Johnny. Okay? Look at me.” He reached out with his other hand to tilt Johnny’s chin back up when he looked away. “You  _ deserve _ love, alright? Say it.”

“I-I—” Johnny’s voice stalled in his throat, thick and clogged with emotion. Ben’s gaze was pressing though, and Johnny forced the words through the blockage. “I d-deserve love.”

Ben’s expression did something complicated before he managed to pull it into a smile. “Good. Good,” he said, reaching up to ruffle Johnny’s hair a little. He pulled back after a moment and quickly scrubbed at his eyes. “Now, as for you and icicle brains, I think you two are sweet together. He’s good to you, which is for the best because I’d have to clobber him otherwise.”

Johnny rolled his eyes. “You know he’s an omega level mutant, right? The same way people like Storm and  _ Magneto _ are omega level mutants?”

Ben scoffed. “Like we never whooped Mags’ butt before,” he said. “Point is, Bobby’s a good man, and he treats you right.”

“He is, he  _ does _ ,” Johnny said, putting on a weak smile.

“But that don’t mean you  _ have _ to love him,” Ben continued. “Don’t give me that look, I  _ know _ you Johnny,” he said, cutting Johnny off when he started to protest. “If you love Bobby, that’s great, and I’m happy for you, but if you ain’t, that’s okay too. It’s somethin’ you gotta figure out for yourself kid.”

Johnny bit his lip, digesting the words. Ben had a point; there was a part of Johnny that felt like he  _ should _ love Bobby just to reciprocate his feelings, born of a lifetime of trying to convince himself he was in love with someone he wasn’t. It wouldn't be fair to either himself or Bobby, but Johnny didn't want to consider his life without Bobby.

“I just… I just wish I could  _ know _ , you know?” Johnny said softly. “Like Sue and Reed, it seems so easy for them, like it comes naturally.”

Ben let out a long sigh. “It does seem like that,” he said quietly, “but that don't mean they don’t have their own problems. You’ve seen ‘em spat before.”

“Yeah, but I never doubted they would ever  _ actually _ break up,” Johnny said. “They just… they just  _ fit _ .”

Johnny fought off a pang of jealousy at his own words. It wasn't that he was  _ bitter _ about his sister’s happiness, not in the slightest, he’d always been happy for her to have found the one person in the universe who was absolutely perfect for her. He simply envied her—he longed deeply for the kind of love she had, wishing that he could be as sure as she was the first time she’d come home from a date with Reed, glowing like a star from happiness. Johnny had impatiently waited for his turn, for that moment when he was so sure that he was with the right person that it seemed like it was written in the stars.

Johnny didn't know if that was what he had with Bobby.

Ben let out another long sigh. “Yeah, they’ve got something special,” he agreed. “It’s hard not to be jealous sometimes.”

Johnny looked up at Ben, surprised for a moment—didn’t Ben have Alicia? But then he remembered all the years they’d seemed to dance around each other, like planets orbiting the same star, getting caught in one another’s gravity but never quite meeting. They were together now, but would this finally be the time they stuck to it? It was hard to say.

“Yeah,” Johnny agreed, voice barely more than a whisper.

On the TV screen, a man on screen begged his wife to take him back after he’d cheated on her with her sister and her cousin. The woman was crying hysterically and ran to the balcony, seemingly flinging herself off of it to the garden below. The episode ended with a narrator trying to play up the cliffhanger.

Ben yawned and switched off the TV. “Alright, think that’s enough for tonight.”

“You don’t want to know what happens next?” Johnny asked.

“Nah, already know what happens next,” Ben said. “She falls into the strapping young gardener’s arms and runs away with him at the end of the season.”

Johnny raised an eyebrow. “You’ve seen this one before?”

“Nope,” Ben said, “but sometimes it's fun to make up your own ending.”

Johnny snorted. “You should write a fanfic,” he teased.

Ben scoffed and gave Johnny a little shove, but didn’t push him off. They stayed there for a while in the dark, neither of them moving away from each other, Johnny still tucked up into Ben’s side with Ben’s arm around him. Neither of them spoke, both stewing in their own thoughts. Eventually Johnny noticed his eyelids drooping and his head starting to loll as he began to get sleepy.

“Alright,” Ben exhaled, not quite a sigh, “time for bed kiddo.”

“I’m not a kid anymore,” Johnny protested, words slurring a little with drowsiness.

Ben huffed and slowly got up from the couch, careful not to accidentally squish Johnny at any point. He reached a hand out and helped Johnny up off the couch, tugging him up gently.

Instead of letting go, Ben pulled Johnny into a tight hug. Johnny was pressed into Ben’s rocky chest, arms like tree trunks surrounding him. Johnny sank into it, bringing his arms up to grip at Ben’s ribs, not even close to making it around his massive torso.

“The most important thing is that you're happy Johnny,” Ben said softly. “That’s all any of us want for you, kid.”

Johnny took a deep, steadying breath. “Thanks Ben,” he mumbled.

Ben gave him one last squeeze before letting him go. “G’night kid,” he said, shuffling off towards the elevator.

Johnny stood in the dark for a few more minutes, thoughts turning over in his head. He let out a long sigh and made his way up to his suite, taking the stairs so he had more time to think. Instead of going to bed, he headed out onto the balcony to get some fresh air.

It was a dark night, the cloud cover blocking out the moon and stars. A fog had settled over the city, not quite blocking out the lights of the city, but making it glow oddly, like it was underwater. Johnny stood there for a while, leaning on the railing and thinking about the day.

Johnny replayed that afternoon in his head—the teasing banter with Bobby, the bigoted woman,  _ I love you _ . He shivered, remembering the way the words sounded in Bobby’s voice, the way he’d smiled at Johnny as he said it, eyes sparkling with delight. Neither of them had been dressed for the cool weather, and Johnny had felt how cold Bobby’s hands were through his shirt.

_ I love you _ , Johnny replayed the words over in his head again, remembering the shock he’d felt, how they’d bumbled around each other afterwards, Johnny not knowing what to do and Bobby trying to pretend like it was all fine.

Suddenly Johnny remembered he’d promised to call Bobby later. Cursing, Johnny pulled out his phone and swore again when he saw the time. It was probably way too late to call, but Johnny didn’t want to just leave it. His finger hovered over the ‘call’ button, trying to decide. Maybe he should send a text? No, that seemed too flippant.

Letting out a sigh, Johnny pressed ‘call’ and held the phone up to his ear. If Bobby wasn't up, Johnny could just leave a voicemail.

One ring. Two rings. Johnny chickened out and disconnected. Groaning, he leaned down and pressed his forehead to the railing, wondering if he shouldn’t just fling himself over it. Maybe a night midnight flight would help sort his head out.

Johnny’s phone rang, startling him so hard he nearly dropped it off the balcony. He fumbled with it for a moment before answering the call. “Hello?”

“Johnny?” Bobby’s voice came from the tiny speaker, sounding a little worried and more confused. “Are you okay? You just called.”

Johnny bit his lip. “Yeah, I’m fine,” he said. “Sorry, I pushed the button by accident.”

If Bobby noticed that Johnny hadn’t specified whether or not he’d called or hung up on accident, he didn't say. “It’s okay. I was just worried for a sec that something happened to you,” he said. “I’ve had friends get kidnapped sentinels and evil organizations too many times not to get suspicious when people almost call but it doesn’t go through.”

“I’m fine,” Johnny said. “I promise I haven’t been kidnapped.”

“That sounds like something someone would say if someone  _ had _ been kidnapped but the kidnapper had a gun to their head,” Bobby said, voice light and teasing. “Do you need a codeword? Quick! What was the last thing we ate together?”

Johnny laughed, feeling light and warm in his chest. “You’re ridiculous.”

“I’m not hearing an answer. I’m firing up the X-Wing,” Bobby said. There was a shuffle of fabric over the line like Bobby was actually about to get up and round up the X-Men to check on him.

“Oh my God,” Johnny laughed, throwing back his head and facing the sky. “We had lunch today. I had an apple danish and you got a chocolate croissant from the little bakery Piotr suggested.”

“Ah well, all seems to be fine then,” Bobby said.

There was a pause between them, the unacknowledged elephant stretching between them, over the invisible waves of electricity that connected their phones, a million points of data pinging between the cell towers to reach across the miles that separated them. Johnny’s mind raced, trying to pick the right words. He thought back to that afternoon, the street corner, his conversation with Ben, all of it tumbling over and over in his mind.

“Bobby,” Johnny said, breath clouding in the cool air, “about this afternoon…”

“You don’t have to say anything,” Bobby said. “I didn’t mean to spring that on you like that.”

“Bobby—”

“It’s fine Johnny, really—”

“ _ Bobby _ ,” Johnny said a little more forcefully before Bobby could start rambling. “Listen for a second okay?”

“Okay,” Bobby said, voice small.

Johnny could picture his nervous face, the drawn together eyebrows, perhaps he was biting at his lip or nail. The idea was inexplicably charming and Johnny found himself smiling. He wanted to reach through the phone and smooth away the line between his eyebrows.

“I wanted to say I was sorry for bailing earlier,” Johnny said. “I should have taken a moment to talk to you about it.”

“It’s fine,” Bobby said. “I  _ did _ spring it on you out of the blue.”

“Still,” Johnny said, “I shouldn’t have run off and left it like that.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Bobby said. “This was me goofing up. It’s totally fine.”

“It wasn’t a goof up,” Johnny said. “Unless…”

“Unless?” Bobby prompted.

“Unless you didn't mean it,” Johnny said, fighting to keep his voice steady.

There was a long moment of silence as Johnny waited for an answer. His heart was thudding so hard in his chest that he was sure Bobby could hear it over the phone. He wasn’t sure what answer he wanted to hear.

“Yes,” Bobby said. “I meant it.”

Johnny let out the breath he’d been holding, the cloud of fog thick with the heat he’d been holding in. “Okay,” he breathed. “Good.”

“Good?” Bobby asked, sounding hopeful.

“Yeah,” Johnny said.

“Oh, okay,” Bobby said, relief audible. “That’s good.”

“Mm-hm,” Johnny said. “Bobby?”

“Yeah?”

Johnny took a deep breath.

“I love you,” he said.

There was a pause over the phone, but Johnny swore he could  _ hear _ Bobby smile. “I love you too,” Bobby said, voice soft and fond.

Johnny smiled, feeling a warmth that had nothing to do with his powers fill his chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so excited for next chapter y'all don't even _know_.
> 
> I hope everyone is keeping safe out there! Remember ACAB!


	14. Part II.x: Big Bang

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, guess who's fucking alive!
> 
> This chapter was basically finished at like the end of September, but then I got a big old case of the Depression for all of October from a death in my immediate family (no condolences in the comments please, go to twitter or tumblr or something). I've been slowly clawing my way back and finally got around to getting this finished for y'all. I don't know who's still reading but enjoy!

The MET gala was in spring, so theoretically Johnny and Jan should have had plenty of time to have the outfit finished long before the gala. However, due to various elements—the both of them being super heroes, having scheduling conflicts (in part related to being super heroes), the problems Jan had run into with the textile manufacturing, Johnny having partially burnt one of the samples—they ended up a little behind schedule. Spring was nearly upon them and they were starting to feel the pressure. Jan was uncompromising in her work and refused to cut corners, which was both appreciated and really fucking frustrating at times.

“Ow!” Johnny yelped as a pin jabbed him.

“Quit moving,” Jan huffed, tugging him back into position.

“Stop pincushioning me,” Johnny grumbled, but obediently let himself be manhandled back to where he’d been standing before.

“Need a daring rescue?” Bobby chuckled from his seat in the corner where he’d mostly been paying attention to his phone.

“Maybe,” Johnny said as Jan’s assistant got dangerously close to his ankle with a stitch ripper.

“If you move one step, we will be here for six more hours fixing it,” Jan threatened.

“Okay okay, I’m being still, sheesh,” Johnny huffed. “I’ve fought super villains that didn’t try to stab me this much.”

“I’m not _trying_ to stab you, this fabric just hates being pinned,” Jan said. “I have to use a million pins or the fabric just bunches up or folds weird. If I don’t pin it a certain way the threads pull and shred. This is an extremely time consuming endeavor and it will go all-the-faster if you _stop moving_ ,” she hissed.

Johnny grumbled but stayed still, letting Jan concentrate on her work. Bobby smiled up at him and did a circle around the platform Johnny was standing on, carefully avoiding getting too close and having Jan yell at him (again). He gave an appreciative whistle.

“This is coming out really nice,” Bobby said, taking a few extra moments to stand directly behind Johnny in order to—presumably—ogle his butt. “You’re going to wear it for a bit after you come home right? So I can enjoy it too?”

“You could just come to the gala and enjoy it there,” Johnny said, probably a little too fast.

It didn’t necessarily _sting_ that Bobby had declined to go to the gala, he understood these kinds of events weren’t for everyone, but Johnny couldn’t deny that having to go to his first big event after coming out of the closet alone—especially when he had an amazing boyfriend—was a little disappointing.

“I’m good,” Bobby said. “This is your thing, I don’t want to distract you.”

“You’re my boyfriend, you wouldn’t be distracting me,” Johnny said, rolling his eyes. “I mean, not unless you showed up shirtless.”

“I think that would be against the rules for a fancy party like this,” Bobby chuckled.

“It’s the MET Gala, there are no rules,” Jan said around a mouthful of needles.

“Exactly,” Johnny said. “Did you see what Billy Porter wore last year?”

“I might have seen it on twitter?” Bobby said. “This sort of thing isn’t really my scene.”

Johnny chuckled. “Well, if you’re sure you don’t want to go.”

“I’m sure,” Bobby repeated, smiling up at Johnny. “From what I gather there’s going to be a bunch of heroes there, so it’s probably a good idea to have others on standby in case anything happens.”

“That’s fair,” Jan said distractedly.

“Plus I never know what to do at fancy parties like that,” Bobby said. “I always feel like people are judging the way I hold my fork.”

“It’s a dinner party, not meeting the Queen,” Johnny said, rolling his eyes. Then he thought about it for a moment. “Though I think T’Challa is going, so there will be royalty there.”

“T’Challa cancelled actually,” Jan said. “Something back home in Wakanda needed his attention or something, I only skimmed his email.”

“Either way,” Bobby cut in. “I’m fine letting you have the spotlight. This is your night baby.”

Johnny smiled. “I certainly hope so, I spent enough money on this outfit.”

“You’re the one who wanted real Swarovski crystals,” Jan said.

“Can you blame me?” Johnny said, turning his head to admire himself in the full length mirrors. “I look _amazing_.”

“You’re definitely going to break some hearts,” Bobby said, smiling fondly up at Johnny on the stand.

“You can still come and break hearts with me,” Johnny said, trying one last time.

“Pass,” Bobby laughed. “I don’t even have a suit.”

“I do _not_ have time to make him anything, so don’t even ask,” Jan hissed, jabbing a needle through the hemline.

“Fine, party pooper,” Johnny pouted. “I guess I’ll have to go all on my lonesome.”

“Sorry babe,” Bobby said. “I just get too nervous at these things. Trust me, I’d just embarrass you.”

“You think that’s something I care about?” Johnny asked. “I show up to places with Ben all the time.”

“I’m telling him you said that,” Bobby said, chuckling. “Really Johnny, it’s fine. I don’t want to go.”

Johnny tried not to feel upset by that. He understood why Bobby didn’t want to go—he wasn’t used to the gala and charity circuits the way Johnny was. Throwing him into the deep end with the MET Gala probably wasn’t the best way to get his feet wet either. It would probably be a while before Johnny would be able to parade his boyfriend out on any kind of event.

“You’ll at least watch me on TV right?” Johnny asked.

“Of course,” Bobby said. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

Johnny beamed, feeling a little better. He’d still have to talk to Bobby about eventually getting comfortable enough to be his plus one at events, but for now he could just be happy that his outfit was coming along so well.

“Ow!” Johnny yelped.

“Sorry! That one’s on me,” Jan said.

* * *

Whenever Peter walked past the Daily Bugle, either on foot or by swinging, he couldn’t help but enjoy the rush of fond nostalgia that came over him. It had been his first ‘real’ job, and had allowed him to help his aunt keep a roof over their heads and food on the table. Sure, Jonah was a blowhard and had probably shaved enough off his paycheques over the years to buy a decent car, but there was something about the building that felt a bit like a second home to Peter. Very often Peter found himself walking by, just to bask in the warm feeling in his chest.

The warm feeling evaporated when he caught sight of Betty Bryant making a B-line towards him, practically barrelling over the pedestrians in her wake, eyes alight with a fire that always seemed to end up with Peter being the one getting burned.

“Whatever it is, _no_ ,” Peter said as she reached him. He might have run, but he was in line for his favourite hot dog cart and not willing to give up his spot.

“You don’t even _know_ what it is yet,” Betty scoffed. “At least hear me out before you shoot me down.”

“Not a chance. I know how these things go Ms. Bryant,” Peter said, waggling a finger at her. “You’re not going to trick me with your feminine wiles today.”

Betty rolled her eyes despite the smile across her lips. “Funny man. I just need some pictures.”

“I don’t do nudes sorry,” Peter said just as he reached the front of the line. The vendor raised an eyebrow but said nothing and started to prepare his usual order.

“I’ve seen it anyway, I don’t need a reminder,” Betty said without missing a beat, causing Peter to choke and the vendor to snort. “It’s the MET Gala, we need a photographer.”

“You have photographers,” Peter pointed out, accepting his hot dog and fishing for his wallet.

Betty pulled a bill from her pocket and paid the vendor before Peter could stop her. “ _Had_. Our usual guy for the society circuit bailed. Pneumonia or something, he’s not going to be well enough in time for the Gala.”

“You don’t have a backup?” Peter asked.

“Our backup is getting married. She’s going to be in Quebec for her honeymoon,” Betty said.

“Other backup?” Peter asked, feeling the snare beginning to tighten around his neck.

“Cancer,” Betty said.

“Oof,” Peter grunted.

“They’re pretty sure he’s going to make it,” Betty said. “They caught it early and he’s very healthy otherwise. Still, he’s taking time off to deal with that,” she explained. “Which brings us back to—”

Peter groaned. “Betty, you know I love you and I would literally step in front of a bus for you, but this? I take—I _took_ photos of the caped crowd, not socialites and celebrities.”

“Exactly, this is _so_ much easier,” Betty said. “No chasing them around, dangling out of windows for the perfect shot, they stand and pose _for_ you.”

“God that sounds so boring,” Peter said, unwrapping his hot dog and taking a bite.

“It _sounds_ like easy money Pete,” Betty said. She took hold of his wrist and pulled the hand holding the hot dog so she could steal a bite. “Come on, all you have to do is stand around and take pictures of beautiful people in ridiculous outfits. I can even bully Jonah into paying you double for the shots. We’re desperate for a good photographer Pete.”

Peter could feel his resolve crumbling. “Ugh, _fine_ , but only because you bought me a hot dog.”

“The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach,” Betty said, smiling triumphantly.

Peter chuckled and threw an arm around her shoulders. “Aw you know I can never say no to a pretty face.”

“I know,” Betty said, leaning into his side. “That’s why Jonah sent me out here and not some pimply intern, or Jonah himself.”

“I don’t know, I heard ol’ JJJ was a fox when he was younger,” Peter said, grinning when it got a laugh out of her.

“God you’re so terrible,” she said, resting her head on his shoulder.

They stayed that way for a moment, enjoying one another’s company. Maybe Peter was feeling more nostalgic than usual, but he couldn’t help but feel a rush of affection surge up in his gut as they walked together.

“Hey,” he said, quiet and barely audible over the noise of the city. “Remember when we were kids?”

“No,” Betty said, chuckling softly. “I grew up way too quick and you were born with the soul of an old man.”

Peter pinched her side lightly. “I thought I was supposed to be the funny one.”

“You rubbed off on me,” Betty said. “For better or worse.”

“I’d like to think for the better,” Peter said, a little too genuine for it to be teasing.

Betty let out a hum, the two of them going quiet for another moment before she picked her head up off his shoulder. “You’ll really do it?”

Peter looked down at her and gave her a fond smile. “Eh, what the heck. Like you said, it's easy money right?”

Betty smiled up at him and stretched up to give him a kiss on the cheek. “Thanks Pete, I owe you one.”

“Why don’t we call this one a freebie?” Peter said. “After all, you did already buy me this delicious hot dog.”

Betty snorted. “All this time and you still eat like a sixteen year old,” she huffed. “Meanwhile if I so much as _look_ at a slice of pizza I gain two pounds.”

“You’re as beautiful as the day I met you,” Peter cooed, giving her a little squeeze.

“I said I was getting fat, not ugly,” Betty said, elbowing him in the ribs as she extracted herself from his side. “I need to be getting back. I’ll email you everything you need for the night.”

“I’m looking forward to it,” Peter said, taking a large bite of hot dog, somehow managing to slop mustard over his hand.

Betty rolled her eyes. “I’ll make sure there are drawings included with the rest of the instructions.”

“I’m a certified genius,” Peter huffed, licking the mustard off his hand.

“Is that what they’re calling it these days?” Betty tossed over her shoulder as she walked away from Peter, disappearing back into the Bugle.

Peter shook his head, but he didn’t bother fighting the grin on his face. Sure, he’d just been conned into a boring night of taking pictures of celebrities in dumb outfits, but at least he’d gotten a free hot dog out of the deal. Plus it was always nice to see Betty.

It was weird sometimes, to think back on how long they’d known each other for, how much they’d been through together. Peter had known her before almost anyone—MJ, Harry, even _Gwen_ , they hadn’t been there for him as long as Betty. There were very few people in his life who had been around that long. There was Flash and Liz, and he didn’t think Aunt May counted but he was still grateful for her presence in his life, and of course there was also Johnny.

It was a little jarring to think of Johnny as one of his oldest friends. Maybe it was because he and Johnny hadn’t actually become _friends_ until a few years later, their early years filled with petty rivalry—though the same could be said of his friendship with Flash. Perhaps it was because, for most of their friendship, Johnny hadn’t been _Peter’s_ friend, but _Spider-Man’s_. 

Peter pushed down a wave of guilt, remembering Johnny’s words on Christmas about not being one of Peter’s ‘real’ friends. They’d never really brought it up again, it being another one of those fights they had sometimes where they put a pin in and just never unpinned it. Peter had _meant_ to bring it up the next time they saw each other, but instead he’d said something stupid about Johnny’s hair, and they gone right back to their old ways, teasing each other and having a good time, letting all of the bad in the world fall away.

Peter wondered if Johnny didn’t have a point however. Sure, it was kind of awkward to explain why he and Johnny were friends in the first place, but it wasn’t like Peter hadn’t been coming up with weird excuses for things for most of his life. It probably wouldn’t be too difficult to come up with something, especially since it wasn’t exactly a secret that Peter had interned for Reed once. In fact, the more Peter thought about it, the more believable scenarios he came up with.

With a sigh, Peter made a mental note to try and bring it up with Johnny some time and clear the air, maybe even apologize for being such a jerk, if the mood struck him. Johnny was a reasonable person for the most part, he would probably understand.

Maybe Peter could even put whatever weird feelings he’d been having to rest, once and for all.

This in mind, when Spider-Man had finished his rounds that evening, he webbed up a note between two skyscrapers for Johnny to meet him at the Usual Place. It wasn’t as effective as flaming letters in the sky, but Johnny would see it eventually on the news or on his timeline. Of all the times for Johnny being addicted to his phone to come in handy.

Peter headed over to Liberty Island as soon as he finished with the note, but it still took him a while to web raft over. By the time he was pulling onto the shore, there was a streak of fire overhead signalling that he’d been beaten.

“You could have just texted,” Johnny said as Peter swung up onto the statue’s head.

“It’s more romantic this way,” Peter teased, crouching precariously on one of the spikes of the crown. “What’s up, matchstick?”

“Isn’t that my line? You’re the one who called me out here,” Johnny huffed, rolling his eyes—Peter didn’t miss the smile threatening to spread from the corner of his mouth.

“Too good to hang out with your old buddy Spider-Man now? I’m hurt Torchie, real hurt,” Peter crooned, swaying dramatically on his perch.

Johnny reached for Peter instinctively, grabbing his arm and yanking him forwards. Peter’s feet remained firmly stuck to the crown’s spike, and Johnny glared at Peter, who was grinning through his mask. “Jerk,” he grumbled. “I’ll let you fall next time.”

“I won’t fall,” Peter chuckled, elbowing Johnny lightly.

Johnny elbowed him back a little more aggressively. “Not unless I push you.”

“Ha!” Peter cackled. “I’d like to see you _try_!”

“For a guy who’s supposed to be a genius, you seem to forget that I can literally _light on fire_ a lot,” Johnny said, crossing his arms.

“Aw don’t pout kid, I’m only teasing you,” Peter said, slinging an arm around Johnny’s shoulders.

Johnny scoffed. “ _Kid_ , I’m a year older than you,” he said. “And you never answered my question. Why’d you call me out here?”

“Actually you didn’t ask, but I’ll tell you anyway,” Peter said, just to watch Johnny roll his eyes. “I just wanted to hang out. It’s been a while, I missed you.”

Johnny’s face softened and he smiled. “Well if you actually showed up to movie nights.”

“Hey, you were the one who cancelled last time,” Peter pointed out, moving to sit down on the statue’s head.

Johnny sat next to him. “Fair enough. Sorry, I’ve been really busy lately.”

Peter waved a hand. “It’s fine, God knows I’ve bailed on you more than enough to deserve it,” he said. “So what have you been up to that’s been keeping you so busy?”

Johnny groaned and slumped back on his hands. “It’s the MET gala. Jan and I have been working on my outfit for _weeks_ now and we’re hitting crunch time. There was a delay on the small sized crystals so we’re having to sew a thousand of these little bastards into the pattern with less than a month to go.”

“Why does it need so many crystals?” Peter asked. At Johnny’s incredulously raised eyebrow he put up his hands in surrender. “Fine, I know, _fashion_ or whatever, but seriously.”

Johnny scoffed again. “You’ll understand when you see it,” he said. He turned and smiled brightly at Peter. “Are you going to watch it?”

“Sort of,” Peter said. “I got suckered into taking a photography job for that thing, so I’ll be seeing it in person.”

“Seriously?” Johnny asked, lighting up almost literally. “That’s amazing!”

Peter groaned. “Sure, nothing like standing around taking pictures of people who get their pictures taken for a living.”

Johnny continued like he hadn’t heard Peter. “This is great! You always get the best photos. I’m going to look so great!”

“Glad to be of service,” Peter said, barely not rolling his eyes. “I live to cater to your needs specifically.”

“Ha ha,” Johnny intoned sarcastically. “What I mean is—you’re an amazing photographer and you're going to blow everyone else out of the water with your shots.”

“Thanks,” Peter chuckled, “but don't get your hopes up too much. I’m used to taking photos of moving targets, so this is going to be a little different for me. I’m going to be so completely bored out of my skull.”

“Then why do it?” Johnny asked. “If you’re going to have such sour grapes over the whole thing, why agree in the first place?”

Peter sighed. “Well first Betty cornered me—”

“Ah, of course,” Johnny cut Peter off with a knowing smirk. “Suckered by a pretty face. We’ve all been there man, don't worry about it.”

“Well the money won’t be anything to turn my nose up at either,” Peter said, nudging Johnny’s shoulder slightly.

“Yeah right, like anyone could get you to do anything for money alone,” Johnny said. “You’re way too stubborn for your own good.”

“I once ate a bug for a dollar,” Peter pointed out. “Though I suppose it was more of a pride thing, so you probably have a point.”

“Gross,” Johnny said, gagging a little.

“I was _eight_ ,” Peter said. “You can’t hold anyone accountable for anything they did before the age of twelve. Thirteen year olds are fair game, but anything before that has passed the statute of limitations.”

Johnny laughed loud and bright, tossing his head back with it. Peter couldn't have fought off the smile on his face if he tried—he didn’t think he’d ever get tired of bringing out that particular laugh from Johnny. They faced so much every day, every time they put on their suits. It could weigh on any of them, and someone as bright and warm as Johnny didn’t deserve that kind of burden. If Peter could lift that from his shoulders, even for a moment, by making Johnny smile and laugh like he didn't have a care in the world, then Peter would consider that a good day.

“So,” Peter said once Johnny’s laughter had calmed a little, “other than spending your time and money on an outfit you're only going to wear once, how have you been?”

“I’ve been good,” Johnny said, leaning back on his hands and looking out over the bay. “Things have been really good lately.”

“Yeah?” Peter asked, feeling his smile grow soft. “That’s nice. I’m happy for you.”

Johnny tilted his head and smiled at Peter, eyes bright and happy. “Thanks,” he said. “Yeah, I’ve been doing well. The makeup company I’ve been working with is coming out with a new line of lipsticks, so I’ve got some work lined up with that.”

Peter’s throat went a little dry and his eyes involuntarily dropped to Johnny’s lips. “Oh yeah? Sounds fun, in that way that makeup has always been _so fascinating_ to me and all.”

Johnny snorted and shoved his shoulder. “Asshole.”

“Just defending my title,” Peter teased, nudging Johnny back. “What else have you been up to?”

“Well,” Johnny said, drawing the word out, like he was considering saying anything. “Bobby has finally started considering telling his parents about us.”

A cold shock ran through Peter’s body. “Oh yeah?” he asked, glad he was still wearing his mask to help cover whatever expression might be on his face. “I’m surprised they don't know already.”

“I mean,” Johnny said, turning away and looking down at the water below them. “They _know_ , it would be really hard for them _not_ to know. Bobby says his mom likes to keep up with the society articles, so they _must_ know. They just… they don't talk to Bobby about these things, and he doesn't really talk to them either. So they just sort of… dance around each other, not talking about it.”

“Seems like a big thing to not talk about,” Peter said, leaning forward a little. “So what, he just doesn’t talk to his own family about important things? Like the person he’s been _dating_ for months?”

Johnny sighed deeply. “It’s different for Bobby, he’s not like us,” he said. “Bobby’s parents… they don’t really approve of him, in a lot of ways. He’s had problems with them in the past when it came to being a mutant, and now being gay… it’s complicated.”

Peter frowned. “And you're okay with being kept a dirty little secret?” he asked.

Johnny turned to glare at him. “It’s not like that. Don’t be an asshole.”

Peter put a hand up as though to wave away the heated stare. “Fine fine,” he sighed. “You know I’m just trying to look out for you, right?”

“I can look after myself you know,” Johnny said, rolling his eyes. “And yeah, it sucks a little bit, but it’s not like I’m going to force Bobby into something that would make him so uncomfortable. It’s his family, he’s got to work it out with them himself.”

They lapsed into silence for a moment while Peter tried to come up with something to say that wasn’t insensitive. It ended up being Johnny who broke the silence. “Anyway, he’s started mentioning taking me to dinner with them soon, so that’s something to look forward to.”

“Yeah, totally,” Peter said. “You want to set up a secret signal in case you need me to rescue you? Fake phone call about giant alien hornets trying to colonize Long Island?”

Johnny snorted. “No, I’ll be fine. Thank you though.”

“You’re welcome,” Peter said, grinning widely under his mask. “Just another day in the life of your friendly neighbourhood Spider-Man.”

Johnny laughed again, but his eyes were soft and warm, causing something funny and fluttery to make itself known in Peter’s chest. “I mean it Pete,” Johnny said softly. “You’re a really good friend. I’m glad I have you.”

The funny, fluttery thing in Peter’s chest intensified. “Of course,” he said. “I mean, of course I’m here for you. Whenever you need me.” He reached over and laid a hand on Johnny’s arm. “I’ll always be here for you Johnny.”

Johnny smiled and leaned over into Peter’s side, resting his head on his shoulder. “I know you will,” he said quietly. “Thank you.”

Peter took a deep breath, inhaling the scent of fire and the faint traces of some sort of expensive shampoo Johnny insisted on using. It was as familiar to Peter as the line of heat against his side, something so completely Johnny Storm that trying to extricate them from each other would be impossible.

The fluttery feeling in Peter’s chest settled into something warm, spreading through his entire body. It felt strangely _right_ , like it always should have been there. Peter wrapped his arm around Johnny’s shoulders and pulled him close.

Johnny hummed. “You know you're my best friend, right?”

It was as if someone had doused the feeling in a bucket of tepid water. Which was stupid because why should he feel disappointed by being Johnny’s friend? Johnny _was_ a friend, a really good one too. There was no reason for Peter to feel like something was stepping on his heart.

“You too,” Peter said eventually, giving Johnny a little squeeze, ignoring how much he wanted to chase that warmth again.

* * *

Despite the fact that Peter would much prefer to spend his evening swinging above the New York streets dressed in skin-tight spandex, he couldn’t argue that the MET Gala really was a sight to behold. Peter had done the event circuit before with MJ once or twice before, but there was no comparison to the sheer opulence and spectacle of the MET Gala. It was truly frightening what the rich and glamorous would spend their money on.

 _Well,_ Peter thought as he snapped another photo of another glittery outfit, _at least I’m getting paid for this._

Peter didn’t really keep up with the society circuit that much other than to note when someone he knew was caught up in it, but even he could admire some of the artistry that went into these events. This year people seemed to have gone all out, taking the theme of ‘cosmic’ to the furthest extent that they could. Stars and planets featured heavily, as well as celestial bodies and beings—Peter was fairly sure at least three people he’d seen had based their outfits on Galactus.

“That is the improper arrangement of constellations,” Peter muttered to himself behind his lens. At least the lighting was all set up beforehand and Peter didn't need to adjust his settings.

“Does it really matter?” the woman next to him asked, clicking away at her camera rapid fire.

“If you’re going to make a point to use the constellations on your outfit, at least take the extra step to arrange them properly,” Peter said. “Otherwise you just look stupid.”

“They’re celebrities, they’re allowed to be stupid,” the woman chuckled.

Peter snorted. “True, _however_ —” he paused to snap a few pictures of someone he was pretty sure was a pop star, “it’s the _designers_ who actually make the outfits. They _do_ need to be smart.”

The woman laughed. “Fair enough,” she said. They lapsed into silence for a moment as a larger group of people flounced through their section of the walkway. Other photographers jostled around them and called out various names that Peter probably should have known. Peter and the woman next to him stayed quiet, letting the others around them make a racket.

“So what was your name again?” the woman asked when they had a moment of respite.

Peter glanced down at her. She was short but curvy, though Peter would wager a guess that she had a fair amount of strength hidden under her squishy appearance. She had straight black hair that was pulled back and clipped out of her face, though a little loop of hair was escaping at the back. She was cute, enough so that Peter couldn’t help but grin as she turned her hazel eyes up at him.

“It’s on my nametag you know,” Peter pointed out, watching as she fiddled with her settings.

She rolled her eyes. “I know that, I was trying to be polite,” she said. She raised an eyebrow at him. “Are you this much of a jerk with everyone else or just the people who flirt with you?”

“I think I’m just a jerk in general,” Peter answered, picking up his camera again as another cluster of people came through. “I’m Peter, by the way. Peter Parker.”

“I thought I recognised you,” she said, even as she took photos rapid-fire. Peter applauded the speed of her fingers. “You’re the superhero guy.”

Peter hadn’t worked as a photographer for a long time, and his talents were somewhat niche, so it was always pleasantly surprising when people recognised him. He supposed he shouldn’t have been that surprised, recalling that _Webs_ had been a bestseller, but it always threw him for a second.

Peter flashed her a quick grin. “That’s me. You’ve seen my work?”

She scoffed. “It’s kind of hard to be in the New York photography crowd and _not_ see your work. You’re the only person I’ve ever seen that made a guy dressed in spandex swinging on a bungee cord look actually cool.”

“ _Bungee cord_ ,” Peter scoffed under his breath. “It’s all about capturing dynamic movement,” he said. “You’ve gotta have the _eye_ for it.”

“The _eye_ for it,” she repeated mockingly. “Whatever, guess I can’t argue with the results.”

“You know it,” Peter said with a grin. “And you? What name do you hail by?”

“You’re so weird,” she said, chuckling a little. “I’m Nicole.”

“Nicole,” Peter hummed, rolling the name over his tongue, enjoying it for the moment. “That’s really pretty.”

“I actually go by Nick most of the time,” she said. “I like to keep people on their toes.”

Peter laughed. “I can tell,” he said. Another cluster of people sauntered past and they went quiet for a moment as they both snapped photos. “You here with a paper or are you freelance?”

“Magazine actually,” Nick said. “It’s mostly a fashion rag, but sometimes it dips into celebrity gossip. They pay pretty decently though.” There was a break in the crowds of people and she took a moment to check her shots. “What about you? You're with the Bugle right?”

“Technically I freelance,” Peter explained, “but I got suckered in for tonight as a favour to a dear friend.”

“I was wondering why you were here,” Nick said. “It doesn't seem like your usual scene from what I’ve gathered from your work.”

“What can I say? I’m weak to a pretty face,” Peter said with an overdramatic sigh.

Nick snorted, but was cut off from saying anything as another group of people sashayed by. Peter took another second to regard her before returning to his work. How long had it been since he’d been in a relationship? Or even been on a date? Quite some time, now that he gave it some thought. Nick was obviously interested, and there was enough chemistry between them for Peter to imagine it. Maybe after all the work was done, Peter would swipe her number and end the night with a kiss.

As Peter was trying to imagine what kind of restaurant Nick might enjoy most, there was a series of gasps from up the walkway and the sound of dozens of cameras clicking away. People around him jostled and murmured, trying to get a better look at who it was coming down the lane.

Peter leaned in, camera ready to snap some shots of whatever celebrity it was that was causing people to freak out so much. Whoever it was, they must have been pretty spectacular to cause such a commotion. Peter leaned a little further over the barrier to get a better look.

It was Johnny.

“Oh wow,” Nick said, genuine awe in her voice.

Johnny was _magnificent._ Dressed in yellow and orange satins and silks and glimmering from head to toe with crystals, the cut of the piece a perfect blend of masculine and feminine. The neck of the shirt was open and dived low, exposing his throat and collarbones. A long cape billowed from Johnny's shoulders, fading from yellow to orange to finally flashes of red at the edges. Crystals and golden embroidery cascaded in swirling patterns across Johnny's chest, down the cape, and down the sides of both legs. White silk evening gloves and a golden tiara-like headpiece gave the impression of regality, like Johnny was some kind of prince. His hair had been styled into fluffy curls, perfect and looking soft to the touch. Golden dust had been brushed across his cheek and collarbones, drawing the eye. Red and orange makeup framed his eyes, making the blue irises all the brighter. His lips were bright red and shiny

For a second, all Peter could do was stare, practically forgetting how to breathe. The flashes of the cameras around him made it look as though Johnny was sparkling as he walked slowly up the aisle, pausing every so often for the photographers. A flash went off next to Peter's face and he remembered that he was supposed to be working. He lifted his camera and started taking pictures.

Johnny continued up the aisle, smiling brightly at everyone vying for his attention. He spotted Peter and grinned wider, taking a few steps so Peter would have the best shot. Peter bit his lip, trying to concentrate on getting the shot and not on just staring at Johnny.

After a moment, Johnny's grin turned wicked and he winked at Peter. _Watch this_ , his eyes seemed to say. He delicately took the edge of his cape, lifting it ever so slightly. He glanced at Peter one more time before turning into a spin, flaming on as he did so.

Gasps and shrieks erupted from the crowd as Johnny spun, the flames travelling down his body, sending white sparks into the air. Dark lines burned into the fabric of the cape, forming designs between the crystals. Sun and star decals appeared, completing the pattern that until then hadn't even seemed unfinished. The flames travelled down the cape as Johnny spun, ending with a little flourish, a ring of flame flicking off the edge of the cape. Only the headpiece remained aflame, licks of fire curling up over Johnny’s head like a magnificent crown or halo.

Peter was spellbound, hardly noticing the clamour around him. Jan had really outdone herself this time. Johnny was _beautiful_ . Every line, every crystal, every single _stitch_ seemed to be dedicating it's entire existence to making Johnny appear not as a common prince, but as some kind of ethereal being, there to grace the undeserving masses with his radiant visage. Distantly Peter remembered the theme of the gala to be 'cosmic', but Johnny had far outstripped that and gone right to being downright _celestial_.

Johnny caught his eye again and smiled, mischievous and bright, but with a softness underneath. Peter had seen the smile before—it was the one he had when he was playing an affectionate prank, or sharing an in-joke between the two of them. It was playful and private, but suddenly it seemed like so much _more_.

It was like the air had been sucked out of the room, the whole world turning in slow motion. Peter felt like he was at the top of a swing, that split second before gravity took hold and he was suspended weightlessly in the air. For a second he forgot where he was, what he was doing. All that existed at that moment was him and Johnny, sharing that intimate smile. It would be the easiest thing in the world to cross the gulf between them, sweep Johnny into his arms, lean down to press a kiss to his plush red lips and—

Oh.

_Oh._

_Oh_ **_shit_ ** _._

All at once it felt like the universe was simultaneously condensing and expanding around him. Peter could hardly breathe as his entire existence seemed to shift three inches to the left. Every moment he’d spent with Johnny, every laugh, each tear, all suddenly came into razor sharp focus. All the years of the two of them caught in each other’s orbit suddenly deconstructed in front of his eyes, reforming in the same instant with a single difference in the molecular makeup.

 _I’m in love with you_ . The thought came clear and sharp in Peter’s mind like an arrow to the brain. _I’ve been in love with you this whole time._

In front of him Johnny gave one last little wink to Peter, the motion sending a shock through his body, restarting his stuttered heart, making it pound so hard it made him dizzy. With a coy smile, Johnny began to move along, heedless of the lesser beings calling out his name, vying for his attention. Peter could only watch him leave, rooted to the spot by his world-shattering realization.

At the end of the walkway Peter had stationed himself at was a staircase leading up into a different section of the gala. As Johnny approached the bottom, a semi-familiar man sidled up to him. Peter would later learn that this was some B-list actor who had recently gotten some backlash due to some mildly homophobic comments. He’d made a half-assed apology on twitter, but he already had a reputation for being something of an asshole when it came to gay men.

From where he was standing, Peter could just make out what Mr. B-list was saying, his lips turned up in a mocking little smile as he offered his arm to Johnny to assist him up the stairs like a damsel. Peter could see the exact moment he realized his mistake, his eyes going wide and his jaw going slack as Johnny flashed him that coquettish smile of his, quirking that perfect brow. As Johnny took the offered elbow, Mr. B-list couldn’t take his eyes off Johnny, enthralled by the radiant creature at his side. Johnny, for his part, seemed to know _exactly_ what he was doing, knew that every eye in the room was rightfully on him. He knew just what effect he was having on everyone in the room, and was enjoying it thoroughly.

As they reached the end of the stairs, Johnny extracted himself from Mr. B-list with another knowing smile and a (mocking?) curtsey, disappearing into the crowd like a fey creature. Mr. B-list stood at the top of the step, seemingly in shock, teetering like he might fall back down in a heap.

(A month later that same actor would come out as bisexual, apparently spurred into a realization by ‘the most beautiful man he’d ever laid eyes on’.)

 _I know exactly how you feel man_ , Peter thought in the moment, his whole world still tilted on its axis like he’d been hit by a meteor.

The rest of the night passed in a blur. Peter was distantly aware of piloting his body, taking pictures on cue and giving monosyllabic answers whenever someone spoke to him. He felt at some point during the evening Nick move away from him, losing interest in him when he stopped trading witty banter with her. It hardly mattered anyway, Peter could only think of one thing.

 _All this time_ , Peter thought, _all this time I thought I was being a shitty friend._

Everything made so much more sense now. His jealousy when it came to Johnny with other men, his obsession with Johnny’s fashion choices, his sudden and inexplicable dislike of Bobby. It all seemed so obvious now that Peter wasn’t sure how he’d missed it.

_The biggest, most oblivious idiot on the planet._

The next thing Peter was fully conscious of, he was swinging high above the city, panting hard and heart pounding so hard it felt like it might burst out of his chest. He could feel the sweat clinging to him under the fabric of his suit. How long had he been swinging?

Just as Peter had the thought that he should probably stop and get his bearings, he was viscerally made aware of where he was as the billboard of Johnny came up at his left, causing him to jerk and lose his grip on his webline. Despite his spider-sense blaring in his skull, he didn’t have enough time to react and went crashing to the rooftop, landing hard enough to wind himself.

Peter stared up at the sky as he gasped for breath, the giant billboard of Johnny’s face just in his periphery, mocking him. Above him there was a meagre amount of stars visible, reminding him further of the man he was apparently in love with and had been for some time.

 _How did I not fucking see it?_ Peter thought as he lay there. So many times over the years he’d known Johnny that were so _glaringly_ obvious now. All of the feelings he’d kept locked away in his chest, never truly realizing what they _were_ until now. All that time wasted pining, not realizing deeply those feelings went.

And now it was too late. Johnny was with Bobby now, and they were happy together. There had been a gulf of months between Johnny coming out and him dating Bobby, ample time for Peter to have had made a move if only he wasn’t an absolute fucking _fool_.

 _He confessed he was in love with me_ **_to my fucking face_ ** _,_ Peter thought bitterly, grinding his teeth hard enough to make his jaw ache.

“Fuck!” he swore to the heavens, slamming both fists down onto the roof beneath him, hearing it crack slightly. Peter felt like he’d just come out of a fight with the Sinister Six, his whole body aching like he’d been tossed around like a ragdoll. He groaned and dug the heels of his palms into his face, wondering if he could push hard enough to squeeze all the stupid out of his head.

“Spider-Man?” a voice called. There was the sound of someone landing on the rooftop next to him. “You okay?”

Peter opened his eyes to see Daredevil standing over him, a frown marring the visible part of his face. “I’m fine,” he coughed.

“You sure? I heard something fall and then heard you scream,” Matt said, crouching next to him. “Your heart is pounding like crazy.”

“Yeah, I’m good,” Peter groaned, hauling himself up into a sitting position. He glanced over at the large billboard of Johnny. “Just feeling really fucking stupid right now.”

Matt hummed. “And that’s different from usual?”

Peter sighed. “I don’t know why I bother.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And with that, we finally reach the end of part II!
> 
> Thank you especially to Sop who did the amazing artwork for Johnny's outfit and was so amazing and talented and put up with my weirdness and has been so patient about me getting this chapter out. Their twitter is [here](https://twitter.com/sopjustsop?lang=en)and their tumblr is [here](https://lanfibio.tumblr.com/). Check them out!

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/Misha_the_Berry) and [Tumblr](https://mishatheberry.tumblr.com)!


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